ArmyManual.jpg
U.S. Army working on new manual for troops in Afghanistan. The new handbook orders soldiers not to criticize the Taliban, advocate for women’s rights, or say anything bad about pedophilia… because that would be “culturally insensitive.”

{ 53 comments… read them below or add one }

ooddballz December 12, 2012 at 10:46 am

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You have GOT to be ki…..oh, Obummers second term. Never mind.

jcrowley1985 December 12, 2012 at 1:10 pm

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We wouldn’t even need an army if Ron Paul were president.

Alien December 12, 2012 at 1:17 pm

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what.. just nukes, carrier groups, airforce, and armed populace? And hope the rest of the planet keeps trade lanes open?

JPTravis December 12, 2012 at 1:54 pm

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I had to remind someone recently why I didn’t support Ron Paul for president. One, he sent out disturbingly racist newsletters in the 80s and 90s, then pretended he didn’t write them or know what was in them. Two, he took double reimbursements for travel expenses for years, then pretended he didn’t realize it. Three, he was too old to be running for president. Nobody wants a president over 80 years old – the mind starts to go at some point.

In short, he’s a doddering old racist crook.

RobertW December 12, 2012 at 3:26 pm

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Ron Paul: doddering old racist crook

flashingscotsman December 12, 2012 at 3:44 pm

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Still would have been an improvement over Obama.

KimmyQueen December 13, 2012 at 1:16 pm

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Ahhhhhh…. I want to agree with you but I don’t… know if I can… Ron Paul is terrible.

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 2:00 pm

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he’s natural born
he can pass for white
he can manufacture any lie they want…

i understand your quandary.

Trickie December 13, 2012 at 4:02 pm

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Paul should enter rehab so he can claim all the things he’s said in the past was because he was stoned instead of stupid

poppajoe49 December 13, 2012 at 6:16 pm

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Nobody would fall for that.

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 6:48 pm

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except:
number one answer: marion barry
number 2, (and i do mean deuce) barry mammoth blow

KimmyQueen December 13, 2012 at 1:16 pm

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He has done NOTHING of value in all of his years. NOTHING. He was a waste of time and money. I have NO IDEA why anyone continues to vote for him.

poppajoe49 December 13, 2012 at 6:18 pm

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Just look at who votes for him, and you’ll have your answer.
They’re all Moonie rejects..

Not so silent December 12, 2012 at 7:15 pm

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Well we all here at IHTM DON”T NEED YOU……Goodby Creepy Crowley….Don’t let the Internet door hit you in that large ass on the way out.

KimmyQueen December 13, 2012 at 1:14 pm

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Ah Lord! Why…? Why did I even read that? Why? Why do I this to myself?

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 1:57 pm

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to witness for the LORD. imo.

RKae December 12, 2012 at 10:48 am

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Damn! It’s “walking on eggshells” time in the US military! You can’t say anything bad about women’s rights (and I’m guessing homosexuality and a truckload of other leftist victim groups) if you’re standing in the room with another US soldier, and you can’t say anything good about it if you’re standing in the room with one of the locals.

So… what do you do if you’re standing in the room with one of your fellow soldiers AND one of the locals? I suppose it’s a bit like being at the office with your wife and your mistress in the same area: you just don’t say anything, and you chuckle overly-politely at whatever either one of them says.

Pathetic. XTC was wrong: Sgt. Rock is NOT going to help us.

flashingscotsman December 12, 2012 at 11:57 am

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Which, in my mind, is an official government statement that those things ARE part of Islam. I’ll be pointing to this whenever someone says that Islam isn’t like that.

sifi December 12, 2012 at 12:55 pm

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So much for liberating the oppressed.

JPTravis December 12, 2012 at 1:59 pm

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Good point. So what exactly is our purpose at this point? To make Afghanistan more comfortable for the Taliban? To make sure any hope the oppressed citizens might have harbored is completely extinguished?

I say either leave or wage un-PC war. This in-between mode is stupid.

Sidekick December 12, 2012 at 3:02 pm

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Testing the social engineering of the military in a combat theater.

KimmyQueen December 13, 2012 at 1:18 pm

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For real… I thought the Taliban are the enemy… If they aren’t then why are we there?

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 2:04 pm

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enforcing freedoms we dare not retain for ourselves?

well you asked.

*(mumble mumble) barry ‘em barry (mumble mumble) crap-head bastid (mumble mumble) 10 mins alone in a room with you we have a come to Jesus meetin’ I gay ron effen tee you monkey farmin so and so!

Alien December 12, 2012 at 1:02 pm

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bloody hell.. i guess my old thought that our troops could’ve secured girls access to school never stood a chance.

what a damn shame

MDLION December 12, 2012 at 3:06 pm

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They aren’t supposed to say anything bad about pedophilia? I have a hard time believing the Democrats and particularly, Hillary Clinton, would accept that. After all, they are all about “the children”(at least the ones who are allowed to be born).

poppajoe49 December 13, 2012 at 6:27 pm

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True, but it’s more about placating Muslims.

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 7:21 pm
Sidekick December 12, 2012 at 3:37 pm

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I get that the manual says that soldiers may not insult the Taliban. Are they still allowed to shoot them?

That Guy December 12, 2012 at 4:01 pm

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No, the Taliban are poor, oppressed freedom fighters. Instead of shooting them our soldiers are ordered to turn over their rations, rifles, and any money on their persons in order to make up for America being culturally insensitive.

If this results in any casualties, they will be blamed on the Bush administration for propagating the myth that the Taliban want to kill Americans, and that their hatred of women’s rights and love of pedophilia is wrong.

RobertW December 12, 2012 at 4:04 pm

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turn, bend, pov.

poppajoe49 December 13, 2012 at 6:28 pm

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FORWARD!

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 9:21 am
Progressive Hemrrhoid December 12, 2012 at 4:43 pm

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No bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.
George S. Patton

RobertW December 12, 2012 at 4:46 pm
KimmyQueen December 13, 2012 at 1:20 pm

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Exactly…

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 2:11 pm

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I’d like to point out at this time, that of all the leaders, in all the nations, in all the world, can no man claim beyond refutation of oral and written history, that my LORD, Jesus is his name, and I regard only his name to be reverend, is the only man who can be attested to as NOT being a bastard?
or that he wasn’t born where and when in time it was written that he would be born? for what? peace on earth and goodwill toward men on whom His favor rests. just as important as His birth, His death, burial and resurrection to prove. beyond every shadow of every doubt, that Jesus Christ is LORD, to the glory of God, the Father, the Alpha and the Omega, Beginning without End. Amen

ThatGuy December 12, 2012 at 8:53 pm

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So I guess bringing up the goat f*cking is a bozo no-no also?

We should just litter that country with Lady Smith and Wesson 38 revolvers when we leave. Give the ladies a fighting chance…

A-stan, the only place in the world where they gave up on mortar and just dry stack stones for walls till the next missle strike.

flashingscotsman December 13, 2012 at 8:54 am

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“So I guess bringing up the goat f*cking is a bozo no-no also?”

Coffee, meet screen. Screen, coffee.

Thanks, I needed that.

poppajoe49 December 13, 2012 at 6:32 pm

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No, bringing up the goat screwing is OK, as long as it isn’t a kid.

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 7:28 pm

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um, i reckon you wouldn’t be makin a ref to medic trainin w/goats sirrah.

moudoka December 13, 2012 at 4:45 am

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There is a stark difference between not knowing your allies, and not knowing your enemy. I would embrace any handbook, or guiding principal that dictates exactly what the Taliban, and terrorists as a whole, are. Should our troops understand the local culture? Yes, but within bounds. Our soldiers are not over there on a cultural exchange. They are in a combat zone, and I do not believe they give two shits about which Taliban hate-monger believes being a pedo is okay, and which isn’t. ANYONE who thinks pedophilia is okay is NOT right in the head. Stop giving our boys more red tape, and let them do their damn job.

JPTravis December 13, 2012 at 7:56 am

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Hear, hear! And let them shoot back or let them come home. Right now the rules of engagement mandate that American boys being fired upon cannot return fire until they are absolutely sure no civilians are in the firing zone – then they have to try for an arrest as first priority rather than trying to kill the enemy. People call WWII the good war – well, my father says if Germans fired at them out of a civilian home they destroyed that home, no ifs ands or buts, no regard for the fact that they were in Belgium or France. It’s called war. It’s ugly, it’s a mess, and you shouldn’t engage in it if you don’t have your priorities straight.

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 8:40 am

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cannot return fire until they are absolutely sure no civilians are in the firing zone – then they have to try for an arrest as first priority
fornicate that cacophony!

you shouldn’t engage in it if you don’t have your service-members straight. and that goes from the cic down to the lowliest shave-tail private!

flashingscotsman December 13, 2012 at 8:56 am

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I say we put birth control in the water supply, and bring our soldiers home. In a few decades, there’s nothing left to worry about.

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 9:22 am

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you’re a genocidal idiot!

unless you’re not serious, then ha ha, very funny. :D

poppajoe49 December 13, 2012 at 6:34 pm

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I vote for arsenic as birth control.

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 7:29 pm

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i’ll talk to yew laters. arsenic my aunt’s fanny. i’ll poison cowardly.

Not so silent December 13, 2012 at 10:25 pm

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Imagine if this kinda shit had gone on during WWII? Half of us would be speaking German, the other half Japanese, and everybody in Florida would be speaking Italian……..

RobertW December 13, 2012 at 10:44 pm

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and dr. zoizburg would be roasting on a spit, with some lemon garlic cow’smilk butter, salted non-all-organic
nom noms…. where was i? nvm… i kick they bootay!

Sidekick December 14, 2012 at 4:52 am

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Meanwhile we are drone striking the shit out of the region. The inconsistencies of the policies over there are amazing. Don’t insult anyone but perfectly okay to violate another country’s airspace and remotely bomb people. I’m not judging the drone strikes just the bi-polar DOD.

poppajoe49 December 14, 2012 at 5:51 am

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But, it’s not the DOD it’s the CIC.
All roads lead back to The One.

Sidekick December 14, 2012 at 5:53 am

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You’re right.

poppajoe49 December 14, 2012 at 5:54 am

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None of this kind of shit happened 8 years ago.