“Use anti-abortion instead of pro-life and pro-abortion rights instead of pro-choice. Avoid abortionist, which connotes a person who performs a clandestine abortion.”
Ted Cruz just called Mitch McConnell a liar on the Senate floor. We wish we had been there to give him a standing ovation.
In wake of Planned Parenthood videos, Justice Department launching investigation. No, silly goose, not into Planned Parenthood’s selling of baby parts! The Justice Department is going to investigate the Center for Medical Progress for making the videos.
Former President Carter staffer wants to save planet by shooting Republicans. Because, like, humans are parasites, dude, and Republicans don’t like animals, ya know? Or something.
IRS used conservative organization donor lists to target audits. Which of course is exactly the opposite of what they said at the time.
Obama on The Daily Show says IRS targeting of Tea Party never happened. Even though internal auditors at the IRS say it did happen and even though the Justice Department is (supposedly) still conducting a criminal investigation into it. With encouragement like that from the boss, we can guess how hard those Justice investigators are working on this…
Kerry surprised and “very disturbed” by news from Iran. With ink on the nuclear treaty barely dry, Secretary Oompa Loompa is shocked—shocked I say!—that it sounds like Iran bargained in bad faith.
Rachel Dolezal: “I didn’t mislead anybody; I didn’t deceive anybody.“
“I wouldn’t say I’m African-American,” she continued, “but I would say I’m black and there’s a difference in those terms.”
Meet Hillary Clinton: Named after Sir Edmund Hillary even though she was born a year before he climbed Everest, canny investor who turned $1,000 into $100,000 trading cattle futures, combat veteran who barely survived sniper fire, tried to join the Marines but was rejected—“You’re old, you can’t see, and you’re a woman… go join the Army.”—and turned down by NASA when she wanted to be an astronaut. Let’s face it: Granny is a very impressive fictional character.
1998: “So what are the effects of increasing minimum wages? Any Econ 101 student can tell you the answer: The higher wage reduces the quantity of labor demanded, and hence leads to unemployment.”
2015: “There’s just no evidence that raising the minimum wage costs jobs…”
O’Malley apologizes for saying “white lives matter.” Logically, that means he thinks white lives don’t matter. Doesn’t that mean he doesn’t matter?
Utica shale deposits larger than previously thought. The new estimate is 782 trillion cubic feet of natural gas and 1.9 billion barrels of oil—twice as much oil and twenty times more natural gas than the 2012 USGS estimate. Looks like “peak oil theory” just took another hit.
The Huffington Post decides not to cover Donald Trump campaign. Except in the “Entertainment section” as a “sideshow” like “the Kardashians and The Bachelorette.”
Stampede at largest mosque in Africa injures 80 people. Worshippers were enjoying the holiest night of Ramadan when a mouse ran over a woman’s foot. She screamed and bolted for the door. Mass panic ensued.
Slovenian artist invents font that tells you when the NSA is watching. The font analyzes what you type and any word flagged by the NSA is automatically redacted. So your emails end up looking like the picture.
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GAO discovers HealthCare.gov “not set up to detect fraud.” Phony applicants that GAO investigators signed up last year were automatically re-enrolled this year, sometimes with even bigger government subsidies.
Obama’s nuclear deal obligates federal pressure on state pension funds to invest in Iran. You can’t make this shit up.
Obama’s nuclear deal forces U.S. to HELP Iran’s nuclear program. You can’t make this shit up.
One third of vets waiting for VA medical care already dead. Well, that’s one way to shorten the list.
Oakland School Board formally recognizes “Nigritian Ebonics.” Oakland schools will now have special teachers trained to communicate and educate children in this newly recognized “language.”
New York City spiraling downward under communist mayor. Now the city council wants to decriminalize public urination, because who doesn’t want to see a homeless man’s junk while he’s peeing in the street?