DHS Terror Document Lists Yawning, Goose Bumps As Suspicious Behavior. So, this means everyone who listens to an Obama speech and yawns is a terrrorist?

{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Notsosilent March 16, 2012 at 9:31 pm

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Yea, just ignore the beard, turban, and the sixty pounds of c-4 in their man bag.

Ruben March 16, 2012 at 9:45 pm

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TSA Agent #1: “Psssst… see that 85 year-old white lady over there?”
TSA Agent #2: “Which one? The one mixed in there between the dozen Somalis whispering to one another?”
TSA Agent #1: “No, over a bit further.”
TSA Agent #2: “The one to the right of the Iranian carrying the briefcase with the hazmat sticker on it?”
TSA Agent #1: “NO! THAT ONE (pointing)… just to the left of the 19 year-old Saudi kid mumbling to himself.”
TSA Agent #2: “Oh, yeah… what about her?”
TSA Agent #1: “She yawned.”
TSA Agent #2: “Careful… I see she’s giving you goosebumps!”
(Audience laughs… nervously)

KimmyQueen March 17, 2012 at 10:16 am

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Trickie March 17, 2012 at 2:53 am

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The ones who get goose bumps are the ones who make me nervous

Progressive Hemrrhoid March 17, 2012 at 4:27 am

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Meanwhile the nervous looking Middle Eastern male between the ages of 25 and 40 walks right through.

Bonfire of the Absurdities March 17, 2012 at 6:50 am

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Yeah, how about people who get nervous and develop goosebumps when TSA lackeys gawk at them to see they’re nervous or have goosebumps?

MGAP March 17, 2012 at 8:23 am

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Sorry for the length of this.

Hehe, I found this out just last week. I was in a TSA line and several things happened at once. I yawned as the guy in front of me turned and exhaled his fresh cigarette/garbage truck breath in my direction. The inconspicuos TSA agent leaning against the pillar ( look next time, there’s usually one or two ) and I made eye contact. I flinched from the stench from the guy’s mouth and she looked like she was about to mess her pants. I watched her in my peripheral vision and I could tell she was eyeing me too. Time for some fun! I shuffled out of her view and got directly behind stinky mouth. She went straight to her mic and made the call, she had a hot one! I then put my backpack up to my ear and listened for a few seconds. She turns white and calls into her mic again. Agent #2 hustles to her side I can see them pretending not to look at me, but once she had me identified, agent 2 casually strolls over in my direction and gets behind and to the side of me. Agent 1 nods slightly. I then decided to end the game and pull out my airport ID. I flipped it to the side where agent two could see it from where she was stationed. Fun part, my airport ID has higher clearance than TSA agents!

flashingscotsman March 17, 2012 at 8:36 am

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Oh, you’re just being mean!


MGAP March 17, 2012 at 8:58 am

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Keeping my wasted tax dollars on their toes. I was hoping for a full on “package” search from agent #2!!!!

KimmyQueen March 19, 2012 at 6:00 am

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I am in trouble as standing in line at the airport bores me and I start to yawn. I still dont understand why the Jews are not being consulted here?