Sarah Palin wrote the sentence. Wink, wink.
Here’s one of the funniest things we’ve ever seen. Over at Slate.com, KevClark64 posted the following sentence from an autobiography:
Sentence, actual
by KevClark64
11/18/2009, 1:09 PMUnder “Sentence, actual” how about this beauty:
“The apartment was small, with slanting floors and irregular heat and a buzzer downstairs that didn’t work, so that visitors had to call ahead from a pay phone at the corner gas station, where a black Doberman the size of a wolf paced through the night in vigilant patrol, its jaws clamped around an empty beer bottle.”Wow! That wouldn’t make it through freshman English class, and I mean high school, not college. What’s the sentence about anyway? The apartment? The gas station? The Doberman? How about sticking with one complete thought before going on to three more? Just goes to show that some people should stick with politics and give up any presumptions of being a writer.
That sent the pack of liberal coyotes howling. Sarah Palin wrote it! Sarah Palin wrote it! Numerous comments followed, each attacking Palin’s poor writing skills:
Easy Translation
by LeRoy_Was_Here
11/18/2009, 1:23 PMThe black Doberman belonged to Sarah, because she didn’t want no stinkin’ liberal visitors, and that’s why they made sure the buzzer downstairs didn’t work, too, and, oh, the Doberman was always carrying around an empty beer bottle, because Sarah and Todd had trained it to get rid of all their beer bottles after they were done with drinkin’ ‘em, on account of they didn’t want their place lookin’ like a buncha white trash lived there!
See how easy that was?
And the floors were all slanting towards the right, of course.
HooHoo!
by reJoinder
11/18/2009, 1:45 PMThat’s great, all it needed was the lead-in “It was a dark and stormy night.” Great stuff!
I remember well the breathless, run-on sentences of my High School days…:)
The Bulwer-Lytton Bad Writing Contest
by LeRoy_Was_Here
11/18/2009, 1:46 PMThat sentence by Sarah Palin could be entered into the annual Bulwer-Lytton bad writing contest.
It could have a chance at winning a honorable mention, at any rate.
Then KevClark64 came back to spring a little surprise on the libs:
Re: Sentence, actual
by KevClark64
11/18/2009, 1:50 PMI probably should have mentioned that the sentence quoted above was not written by Sarah Palin. It’s taken from the first paragraph of Dreams from My Father, written by Barack Obama.
While some readers realized what a brilliant “gotcha” moment it was and laughed, others suddenly reversed course and decided that the sentence was no longer awful, but was, in fact, brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
Re: Sentence, actual
by paxterminus
11/18/2009, 3:24 PMThere is nothing wrong with this particular sentence. Although Americans prefer the abbreviated version of the English language (both grammar and the vocabulary) it is fairly commonplace for highly educated people (especially in GB) to use complex sentences with the full range of dependencies allowed by the language. Not all written word is a TV commercial or a Hollywood movie with a guiding principle of not confusing stupid people.
We’re not here to judge whether Obama’s sentence was good or bad. Although we must admit that our feeble conservative brains certainly had trouble following his point by the time he reached his second independent clause.
Our training is in advertising. We believe in short sentences. Punchy sentences (see, we just did one).
But we find it hilarious that Slate.com’s posters laughed their asses off when they thought Sarah Palin wrote the sentence, then reversed course and decided it was brilliant as soon as they learned Obama wrote it.
At least we think Obama wrote it.
Might have been William Ayers.
Who knows.
(See? More of those short, punchy advertising sentences.)
Source: Slate.com
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{ 27 comments… read them below or add one }
No, William Ayers last sentence would have read, “and we had to live there because “the man” was keeping us down.”
I’d rather have a president that can’t write but holds the good of the people in highest priority than a president that can write but holds the good of his/her campaign supporters in highest priority.
who might that be?
so youd rather have sarah palin and john mccain in office? we agree!
This is awesome…thank you for sharing this…
In the end, this is more of a joke on Palin then the bloggers at SLATE. If you were to take the time and read the entries on the SLATE ‘contest’, which started this whole thing, you would then see how utterly ridiculous it is to believe that Palin’s book was written in her words.
How so? Please elucidate.
Thallus, http://www.slate.com/id/2236477/……I‘m sure you can find your way around on this link to elucidate yourself.
Come on, at least try to defend your position. Cowards offer only a link instead of a rhetorical defense followed by a link as further support. Later on this thread, you state that this is just your opinion. Why not try to back that up?
I bet she knows the difference between then and than.
I’m quite sure she DOESN’T……remember, this is the person that thought Africa was a country, didn’t know what the V.P did, didn’t know the countries in NAFTA, didn’t know the Bush Doctrine etc. etc.
Here’s Palin’s greatest hits to refresh your memory.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NrzXLYA_e6E
I noticed it is highly edited. By the way, you can see Russia from Alaska. While in the Coast Guard, the ship I was on passed between the two islands that face each other, one part of Alaska and one part of Russia.
Re sentence actual, YOU are a fool, just because you think you are a liberal does not mean that you have to be a liberal.
YOU have no idea who I am or what I believe.
You mean the opinion you gave was not your own, rather one parroted from slate.com? As such, you probably are not terribly anxious to defend it, especially if you compare the “Write like Sara Palin” article with the little experiment by Leroy_was_here. See above.
Doh….yes it is MY opinion, my humble opinion!!!!
Well mental giants.. with selective memory.. often overlook the number of States there are… but the joy is as always is in… one’s humble opinion.. go figure!
Hey Feline-here is some unimpeachable evidence that Barry has half the brain Palin does.
Then there was the speech when he stated “Iran doesn’t pose a serious threat to us”, stating further that “tiny countries with small defense budgets can’t do us harm”……the very next day he stated “I’ve made it clear for years that the threat from Iran is GRAVE”
1) He thought a tornado in Kansas killed 10,000 people
2) He thinks there are 57 states
3) He thought that Hillary was beating him in KY because of it’s close proximity to Arkansas! That one was great-speaks to the 57 states thing a bit.
4) He said his parents met because of the Selma Alabama march-which occurred in 1965……now, since he was born in 1961, I guess that either makes him a moron, or he is in fact a liar and a moron-(insert your humble opinion here)
5) He thinks that translators working in Iraq, who speak ARABIC or KURDISH, while the Afghanis speak Farsi Pashto, and 5 or 6 other NON-ARABIC LANGUAGES.
6) He had no idea what the Hanford Nuclear Site clean up was(a superfund site, that is the worst nuclear waste site in the US). He had however voted at least once on a bill that funded that exact clean up!
7) Then there was the non-existent Life magazine article that he referenced in Dreams From My Father about a black man mentally and physically scarred from trying to lighten his own skin…the Life Magazine in-house historians said the article DIDN’T EXIST.
The Following all were improperly screened and were guilty of criminal tax evasion that was overlooked for prosecution, or dropped out of their nominations for cabinet positions. Speaks to his intellectual thought processes and his ability to use simple logic in picking employees.
9) Tom Daschel
10) Bill Richardson
11) Nancy Killefer
12) Hilda Solis
13) Susan Tierney
14) Jane Garvey
15) Timothy Geithner
16) Annette nazareth
17) Caroline Atkinson
18) Sanjay Gupta
19) Ron Kirk
20) The stimulus package-didn’t work. The markets are artificially inflated, while unemployment is at a near all time record high. And all the while he is signing bills that add more taxes to the backs of ALL AMERICANS.
21) Health Care theft. This bill will end innovation in the field. It will force the resignation or early retirement of an estimated 40% of all doctors and nurses (for which there is already a major shortage-and less kids going to med school every year)
22) Driving away the Israeli government-which will cost us our most important Ally in the middle east.
23) Joe Biden-if something happens to barry, we are doomed
24) Steven Ratner-busted for $1M pay to play scheme-resigned in disgrace
25) Iraq is starting to become a real mess.
26) More troops have died in Afghanistan (the war he said was a necessary war) while he has been in office than in the previous 8 years.
27) H. Rodgin Cohen-dropped out of the process of being named Deputy Treasury Secretary in the 11th hour-no one knew why-but as a long time Wall Street insider…..(insert humble opinion here).
As a thinking man, I would have to say that one’s action speak to one’s character, intellect, and moral compass. There is no end of criticism that can be sited in the case of Mr. Obama, his stance on pithing living human babies, when they are vacuumed from their mother’s wombs in pieces, his sitting in “reverend” wright’s “church” for 20 years listening to his hate filled diatribes, and the company he keeps. There is no end of criticism that can be sited in his decision making process. There is no end of criticism that can be sited in his looking into the camera in every address he has made to the American public and LIED. The healthcare pitch is a perfect example.
I must say that I have yet to hear Sarah Palin lie to the public. I have yet to hear her give a wishy-washy answer on Afghanistan. I have yet to hear her disavow fraternity with any of her friends, the way Barry Soetero did William Ayers and Reverend Wright, even though the contradictory evidence was so starkly irrefutable. So, as you come to a site like this and want to spout the party line, parroting it nearly word for word from a left-wing smear site, think twice. Generally, we right wing radical ex military domestic terrorist types have read more in the last month than the average lefty has read in their last 10 years of life. Granted, you could all probably beat us in a contest for who can take the most bong-hits, beer bongs, and high score on Grand Theft Auto, but we don’t really take that too seriously, as the fact we get drug tested for our white collar jobs, that require college degrees, and showing up for work daily is a certain sort of pride for us.
And as I always say, I would rather have a 2 year Governor, and 6 year city councilwoman/mayor of a town of 15,000 in Alaska with her finger on the button, than a 1 term US Senator who has never run so much as a lemonade stand, who consorts with America hating, white people hating, bomb throwing terrorists and their abettors!
Happy Thanksgiving
Matthew S Harrison, all I can say is wow. Thank you for saying this much, much, better than I. Looking forward to reading more input from you.
Well done. Come back and post again – you have done your homework!
Wow, impressive you made a list of 27 items in which most were misreported, debunked or not even true (like in – it never happened). I guess my suggestion to you would be that you catch up with what is really going on…..like Obama is in the WH and Palin is not, and probably never will be……of which I am so grateful!
I realize that you went to a lot of trouble to compile this information for your comment, but it doesn’t make Palin any smarter than you would like her to be.
Hope nobody on Slate got whiplash from the sudden change of direction there. Ouch that hurts when you get slammed that hard.
Happy Thanksgiving Everyone! Enjoy your turkey day.
It’s too bad he told them what was going on so early! Doubtless there would have been many more gems.
If anyone would like to pull off their own similar gag, please let us in on it when you are doing it and we’ll publish it all immediately when the mission is completed. Or, if you have an idea for something like this, and would like us to do it, send us the idea. Either way, use the contact form to get in touch with us.
It’s Thanksgiving and I didn’t want to read all of the comments, but this is just the greatest thing I have seen since the last great thing you put up. Love it.
Still no word from Jon?
They exposed the truth too soon.
Should have let more liberals expose themselves for the condescending asses that they are.
I agree with this statement. They should have waited… even PERHAPS waited until MSNBC and Chris Matthews and Oldbermann and Co picked it up THEN say guys this is from Obama and then let the crap hit the fan…