December 2011

Happy 2012, AKA the year we un-elect Obama.

- by CO2Insanity | 18 comments | Share Link

Happy 2012! And don’t worry . . . if the Mayans knew anything about predicting the future Cortez would have never made it to the shore.

- by Kip Hooker | 3 comments | Share Link

Cops: Man tried to use $1,000,000 bill at Walmart. We wonder why he didn’t buy a wheelbarrow for his change?

- by CO2Insanity | 76 comments | Share Link

The parking space, assessed at nearly $300,000, is attached to his condo with an amazing view of downtown Pittsburgh just upstairs. The newly assessed value of his condo is less than $230,000. Well, cities have gotta get the dough to make good on those pensions from somewhere. In post-Obama America, parking will be a luxury. Transformative!

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 7 comments | Share Link

Christopher Dodd, Sen. Lieberman’s former colleague, left office a pariah, statewide and countrywide, but quickly landed on his feet by becoming chairman and CEO of the Motion Picture Association of America. The Sweetheart of Countrywide, part of that large segment of the one percent OWS didn’t see fit to harass.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 8 comments | Share Link

Obama signs sweeping defense bill into law. “He expresses some misgivings about bill and pledges his administration will use discretion in interpreting legal requirements to ensure U.S. citizens suspected of terrorism are not detained indefinitely by military.” In Obama We Trust.

- by A. Smithee | 18 comments | Share Link

Fisker Recalling 239 Karma Plug-In Hybrids for Fire Hazard. A $100,000 car made in Finland using $529M in loans from US Taxpayers catches on fire? How many levels of stupid can you count?

- by A. Smithee | 17 comments | Share Link

Vancouver health authority begins its free crack pipe program for addicts. “The glass pipes are heat-resistant and shatterproof, which experts say should reduce injury to the users’ lips and mouth – wounds that can make them more susceptible to diseases such as HIV and Hepatitis B and C.” What a crackpot idea.

- by A. Smithee | 15 comments | Share Link

Siri Tells Little Boy to ‘Shut the F— Up,’ Calls Him ‘Ugly.’ This makes us wonder if Steve Jobs has already been reincarnated as an Apple app.

- by CO2Insanity | 5 comments | Share Link

Norman Lear: The Occupy Wall Street movement has unleashed patriotic outrage or something. Still bloviating after all these years – the meathead who gave the world “meathead” decides pooping in the streets is the highest form of patriotism. Somehow, he fails to notice the Wall St. bankers he hates are big supporters of his Democrat pals, and like any good egomaniac manages to spend a few paragraphs talking about his favorite subject: himself.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 11 comments | Share Link

Cocaine found on nine out of 10 public baby changing tables in UK. Ummm, poop and pee mixed with cocaine… and no telling what the dealer might have put in it. Oh, and congratulations are in order: the UK has now been named “cocaine capital of Europe.”

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 7 comments | Share Link

The Obama Admin picked a Brazilian company with Iranian ties over an American outfit to produce a new military light attack aircraft. Now the Kansas company is going to court to find out why. Having a company controlled by the Brazillian govt and with connections to Iran produce US military equipment? What’re they, stupid? Well, that may be the best case scenario.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 26 comments | Share Link

Occupy Wall Street: The Lego Set. Wonder if Elizabeth Warren is getting royalties.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 14 comments | Share Link

Occupy’s Rose Parade float: 70-foot octopus of corporate greed: We tried to register our own float illustrating Flea Bagger greed. But the good folks putting on the Rose Parade objected to our giant effigy of a coddled trust fund baby raping the middle class so that it could keep buying Starbucks and Macbooks even after daddy’s credit card had been maxed out.

- by Kip Hooker | 11 comments | Share Link

Chevy to Recall Over 4,000 Cars to Check for Missing Brakes. We guess having one lemon called the Chevy Volt just wasn’t enough for Government Motors.

- by CO2Insanity | 14 comments | Share Link

“Middle Class Warrior” dines out for $260.00: Barry’s greed runs a world in need.

- by Kip Hooker | 11 comments | Share Link

Where’s Waldo Keith? Has Olbermann already worn out his welcome with Al Gore’s Current TV? The NY Times said KO will be conspicuously missing from Current TV’s upcoming election coverage. Apparently the network didn’t even bother to tell Keith his show is being pre-empted Tuesday by its Iowa caucus specials. Sounds like he’s gone from Murrow to burrow.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 14 comments | Share Link


- by CO2Insanity | 17 comments | Share Link

Ed Schultz – Tea Party Republicans are like “sewer rats”. A case of the sewerage calling the kettle “sewer rat”, a holiday present from the sewer of networks….

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 38 comments | Share Link

Obama DOJ approves internet gambling – tax on the poor? Screw the poor, we got a machine to run: “The memo was written by Virginia Seitz, head of Justice’s Office of Legal Counsel and a possible Obama nominee to the Supreme Court. To win Senate approval to serve on the court, she would need the support of Senate majority leader Harry Reid (D) of Nevada.” Home of the gaming industry. Crony capitalism strikes again.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 13 comments | Share Link

Beaver Borough, PA: Sledding is permitted in Roosevelt Park although children under 12 must wear helmets, but the ordinance limits sledding to only Beaver Borough residents. “Non-resident ban was recommended by borough’s insurance company.” Soon you’ll need permission to step out of your house and walk down the street – residents only, please.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 9 comments | Share Link

Defiant Iranian Likely to Face Execution for Tossing Shoes at Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. More love brought to you by the religion of peace. We say give the next guy a couple of hand grenades that look like shoes.

- by CO2Insanity | 18 comments | Share Link

Now might be time for the brace position! The Himalayan airport so dangerous only eight pilots are qualified to land there. Next time you think you had a rough landing think about this place.

- by CO2Insanity | 15 comments | Share Link

How many of you think Alaska is an island? Some twitters did, apparently because all the US maps they’ve seen show it “all by itself.” And BTW, it’s not Sarah Palin that thinks they can see Russia from their house, but some others further east may…


- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 243 comments | Share Link

Alexandra Pelosi, daughter of House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi, says that her mother wants to leave Congress–and that she remains in Washington only at the behest of her campaign donors. “She would retire right now, if the donors she has didn’t want her to stay so badly. They know she wants to leave, though…. It’s obligation, that’s all I’m saying.” We understand… as Tricky Barack said, “Sooner or later you’ve made enough money.” (And we’re sure Alexandra meant to say Nancy’s staying for the children.)

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 7 comments | Share Link