February 2014

Michelle Obama: America’s moms are “confused and bewildered,” “defeated” by grocery shopping. What confuses and bewilders us is how did humanity ever survive the last 10,000+ years before you showed up to explain these things, Moochy?

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 29 comments | Share Link

Surviving Climate Change – By Genetically Altering You. In our opinon it looks like someone’s been watching Waterworld too often.

- by CO2Insanity | 7 comments | Share Link

U.S. economic growth revised sharply downward. Looks to us like it must be about time for Summer of Recovery 5.

- by CO2Insanity | 11 comments | Share Link

OBAMA COULD PULL RUSSIA TRIP AMID UKRAINE TUMULT. We bet Putin’s really quaking in his boots about this threat. Perhaps that red line Obama drew was actually pink.

- by CO2Insanity | 16 comments | Share Link

Supreme Court debate. Below is hidden footage from a secret camera, the first video ever of the Supreme Court in action.

Oops! Sorry but to to technical difficulties you can find the real footage here.

- by CO2Insanity | 9 comments | Share Link

Computer-generated fake papers are flooding academia. Scientific conferences and publications can’t seem to tell the difference. One of the main instigators of this trend says, “I’m psyched, it’s so great. These papers are so funny, you read them and can’t help but laugh. They are total bullshit.” Now we know how Global Warming got into print.

- by J.P. Travis | 14 comments | Share Link

All the President’s IRS Agents. “The targeting of groups opposed to the Democratic agenda has not ended—it’s gotten worse. … Few presidents understand the power of speech better than Barack Obama, and even fewer the power of denying it to others.” The Demofascists response to any questioning of their sooper-geniusness the last 6 years has been “SHUT UP!”

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 5 comments | Share Link

Ukraine says Russian troops take over airports in Crimea. What will President “Red Line” do now? Ignore it and play golf? Or, ignore it and take another vacation?

- by CO2Insanity | 27 comments | Share Link

Obamacare victims are “liars,” says top Democrat. Well, in the former USSR, anybody who didn’t like the benevolent gubbermint policies was “crazy”. So there.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 21 comments | Share Link

Barack Obama: Beyoncé is the perfect role model for my daughters. Talk about a blast from the past (2012). Well, all we have to say is that was certainly a mouth full Mr. President.

- by CO2Insanity | 20 comments | Share Link

Are Climate ‘Deniers’ Anti-Women? Study: ‘Global Warming Will Cause 180,000 More Rapes by 2099′ – Can a carbon tax save you from being raped?! It’s a lot more than 180,000! Try a few hundred million. The rape isn’t sexual, the rape is paying all these carbon taxes, which affects everyone, male and female alike.

- by CO2Insanity | 8 comments | Share Link

Another Republican politician without a spine. Jan Brewer vetoed Arizona’s new religious freedom legislation, pretending in her press conference that it was a drastic erasure of gay rights even though all it did was bring Arizona into line with about thirty other states.

- by J.P. Travis | 11 comments | Share Link

Most Americans disappointed in Obama’s presidency, poll says. Dissapointed sounds rather mild. Flabbergasted, disgusted, pissed-off and appalled sound more realistic to us.

- by CO2Insanity | 8 comments | Share Link

Beyoncé’s lyrics on new release:

Driver roll up the partition please
I don’t need you seeing Yonce on her knees
Oh he so horny, yeah he want to f—
He popped all my buttons, and he ripped my blouse
He Monica Lewinsky-ed all on my gown
I just wanna be the girl you like, the girl you like…

Does anybody in the music industry actually make music anymore?

- by J.P. Travis | 48 comments | Share Link

Greenpeace co-founder: No scientific evidence of man-made global warming. “…the Earth is in an unusually cold period and some warming would be a good thing.” From the comments: “…no theory worth its’ salt, needs to be protected from others’ right to question, challenge, or discuss it.” Yeah, but certain political theories seem to need that a whole lot.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 11 comments | Share Link

Biden says Voter ID laws evidence of “zealotry” and “hatred”. Ironically, as the article notes, the warm-bucket-of-spit’s alleged home state itself has voter ID requirements. Way to go, Slow Joe.

biden at an internet cafe

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 24 comments | Share Link

Minnesota explosion linked to Al Qaeda. The January explosion, which killed three and hospitalized thirteen others, was in a predominately Somali neighborhood in a building owned by a man officially associated with Islamic terrorists but the local FBI office, without bothering to conduct an investigation, quickly announced that there was “no evidence of terrorist activity.” Then they went back to work… investigating Tea Party groups.

- by J.P. Travis | 16 comments | Share Link

Florida Democrat: Without immigration reform, where will we get our landscapers and maids? Well, the entitled political class in medieval times simply captured people and forced them to do such jobs…

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 15 comments | Share Link

Egyptian Army announces device that cures AIDS. Works on Hepatitis C, too. “I take AIDS from the patient, and feed the patient on AIDS, I give it to him as a kebab skewer to feed on,” said Gen. Dr. Ibrahim Abdel-Atti, presumably speaking metaphorically.

- by J.P. Travis | 13 comments | Share Link

Dirty Jobs’ Mike Rowe under attack by the left, including CBS News. They’re angry because he narrated a Wal-Mart ad in which the company pledges to pump $250 billion into U.S. manufacturers – horrors! – so naturally they started lying and accused him of being a “shill for the oppressors.” Long story short: another reason to like Mike Rowe.

- by J.P. Travis | 25 comments | Share Link

Ex-President Carter planning trip to Venezuela. “Former U.S. President Jimmy Carter is expressing concern about Venezuela’s escalating political crisis and wants to meet with leaders on both sides to help ease tensions in an upcoming trip.” It’s bad enough the house is on fire but now the toilet is about to overflow.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 18 comments | Share Link

Bernanke Writing A Book On The Fed And The Great Recession: Zero Interest.

- by Kip Hooker | 11 comments | Share Link

Small Banks Disapearing Under Dodd- Frank: This is why what we do with our deposits should never have been left to men that could not control their own.

- by Kip Hooker | 8 comments | Share Link

West Hollywood Bar To ‘Deny Entry’ To Lawmakers Who Back Anti-Gay Legislation: So far as we know this establishment does not sell wedding cakes. They seem to traffic mostly in hypocrisy.

- by Kip Hooker | 13 comments | Share Link

Black Pastors: Impeach Holder. “A coalition of black pastors … calling for the impeachment of Attorney General Eric Holder for violating his oath of office by trying ‘to coerce states to fall in line with the same-sex marriage agenda.'” Let’s just say consistent, gross abuse of power. Gross.

- by Bonfire of the Absurdities | 18 comments | Share Link