Who has the biggest penis? New research says it’s probably not anyone reading this story.

by editor on March 29, 2011

We present the following information strictly as a public service to our readers. Specifically, we refer those readers who a couple weeks ago involved themselves in a comment thread regarding a man’s size “down there” and whether it mattered.

The Herald Sun Australia reports:

THE internet is full of useful information, much of it unverified but eyebrow-raising.

And the latest addition to this genre is a table of the average penis size by country.

The data, which says it is a mix of stated and undefined sources, has some ego-shattering information for Australian men if it is to be believed.
Australia comes in 94th on the list, with a “measured” average penis size of 13.2cm.

NOTE: We’re sad to report that American men ranked even further down the list with an average girth of just 12.90 cm.

The information is attributed to “Australia’s national agency for health and welfare”.

Number one on the list is the Congo, with an average “self-reported” penis size of 18cm.

Rounding out the top five are Ecuador at 17.5cm (measured), Ghana at 17.3 cm (self-reported), Colombia at 17cm (measured) and Venezuela at 17cm (measured).

It is a little known fact that IHateTheMedia.com’s Editor is Congolese and the Administrator is Ecuadorian.

world-penis-map

Click to enlarge. Get it? Enlarge. Never mind.

Source: Herald Sun Australia

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Harry Lubis
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Harry Lubis

Wonder why almost one third of world population coming from the smallest? Is size really matters?

drew gerhard
Guest

lol wat a bunch of pencil |)iKs…and I do not for one second believe that the canadians nor mexicans have bigger penises than us. Mexicans penises are little, u would know this if u had ever been with a mamacita.

Mistella
Guest
Mistella

Americans, we are so fat that they measure our penis’ girth rather than length.

YT
Member
YT

Sorry America, I thought I was pulling the average up enough for everyone 😉

anarchocapitalist
Guest
anarchocapitalist

Damn, I’m glad I don’t live on a coast! It looks as though, according to the map, that men in those areas don’t even have a penis.

magilla
Guest
magilla

“self-reported” length?!Well, I’m self-reporting that my man-hood is 25 cm.
I dare any of you to prove otherwise.What’s that sweetheart? No, I don’t need help, I think my arm is long enough to reach.

Paden
Member
Paden

Jamal Ginsberg the Hasidic homeboy 🙂

CaliforniaDave
Member
CaliforniaDave

A man meets an attractive woman on an airplane. The conversation gets to work, and she reveals she’s a sexual researcher.

“According to data I’ve collected and analyzed, Native American men have the largest penises in the world. However, Jewish men have the greatest amount of sexual stamina.” She blushes. “I’m sorry – my name is Betsy Thomas.”

“Nice to meet you,” says the man. “I’m Buffalo Shapiro.”

Paden
Member
Paden

You say Liberals correlated this data ?
Oh great here comes a penis tax.

Now we know why so many liberal men become liberal women.

JPTravis
Member

“Oh great here comes a penis tax.”

Don’t worry, they outlawed poll taxes with the 24th Amendment: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twenty-fourth_Amendment_to_the_United_States_Constitution

ocmadam
Member
ocmadam

The Kappa Sigma fraternity at USC today tried to debunk the study.

http://blogs.laweekly.com/informer/2011/03/usc_kappa_sex_nude_photo.php

hisham
Guest
hisham

Were they successful, or did they have to slink back into their burrows?

ocmadam
Member
ocmadam

someone got suspended so i guess it was good enough

shagstar
Member

all i know is,,i may not reach bottom but,i sure raise hell on the sides!!

cpierce
Member

There’s no way that the Mexicans and Canucks have bigger “disco sticks” than Americans, and absolutely no way that the French are bigger.

andycanuck
Member
andycanuck

I don’t know, cpierce, people call me a big prick all the time.

Quayzar
Member
Quayzar

Now, wait; what kind of sickos took the measurements and calculated the averages? I imagine most guys don’t get their penis sizes recorded, so I imagine the data has its share of holes.

Besides, I think it should be noted that many of the, er, better equipped nations have low life-expectancies. I think I would prefer longevity to length any day. Besides, as long as an organ of mine serves its purpose and doesn’t lead to my death, I’m plenty satisfied with its size. As for what a woman might think… well, I guess I’ll find out eventually.

JPTravis
Member

You will notice that some of the “bigger” countries’ statistics were “self-reported,” not measured. As most women will probably verify, self-reportage is not reliable when it comes to penis size.

RockingHorseGuy
Member

I’m sure that, one way or another, the American Taxpayer paid for the study, and the measuring.

KimmyQueen
Member

Yes that is true. Men DO tend to lie on that sort of thing.

drew gerhard
Guest

yah, u have to tell them with body language these days or they won’t believe ya.

JJJRO
Guest
JJJRO

I DID NOT read this story! But I DO love it when KimmyQ is “up front” with it! XXX Yeah Baby! OH, and I am selling a new caucasian friendly man ruler.

Neo-7
Member
Neo-7

What would be a better seller , centimeters or inches ?

KimmyQueen
Member

So basically black AND/OR hispanics have it going on… Uhm I guess I better stay in house then.

And yes it does matter, even if a woman learns how to deal with it, I have spoken to many women who would attest that if her man could be bigger they wouldn’t mind a bit… and any woman who says different is either lying to herself or her husband as far as I am concerned. Don’t hate me because I am just being honest and up front with it.

JPTravis
Member

Up front is the only way to be when it comes to this subject… in my opinion… and not that there’s anything wrong with being another way.

KimmyQueen
Member

O-K…

whiskeyriver
Member
whiskeyriver

Don’t listen to the hype KQ, it isn’t the size of the wand, it’s the magic in it.

Would you rather get a wham, bam, thank you ma’am with a world record cucumber? Or a long, slow, half the night loving with a world record der weinerschnitzel?

KimmyQueen
Member

Neither….

JustAl
Member
JustAl

So much for the preamble of the Declaration of Independence. I think they could have gotten better data by poling , err, polling, the working girls around the world. Does anyone really think it a coincidence that the $100 bill is exactly 6″ long?

CO2Insanity
Admin

I can hear Mrs. Administrator and Mrs. Editor laughing all the way up here in SF!!!