Funniest thing your father ever did? I was watching Joe’s trip and started thinking about the funniest things my father ever did. Well, I have a list, but one of the best was after he was diagnosed with dementia. I was at their assisted living facility near Dallas and my step-mother (who also had dementia), was complaining they needed to get toilet paper. My father said “We have toilet paper” and walked into their bedroom. Out he comes with a roll of paper towels. I said, “That’s not toilet paper.” He replied, “Yes it is, it’s the large economy size, you cut it in half and you have 2 rolls of toilet paper.” I busted a gut laughing. To this day I’m not sure if, at that point, he was serious or not.
This post was last modified on April 2, 2021
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When my dad was in his 40s we were talking and he told me that this one old lady we knew that was in her 80s made his dick hard.
I almost passed out from a combination of shock, embarrassment, and trying not to laugh!
Maybe I've told some of this before, but when I used to take Dad to the VA facility, he was of course a star because he would be wearing his World War II cap and World War II vets are the bigwigs at the VA--they have seniority. But Dad was hard of hearing and the stuff he would lean over and "confidentially" say to me was actually blared to the whole neighborhood. One time he saw a female vet go by and he blared out, "What the hell is a woman doing here?" "Dad, there are lots of female soldiers now." "Nurses?" "Not just nurses, Dad, some of them carry guns. And just in case she's one of the ones who carry guns, maybe you could talk a little quieter." Another time a vet whizzed by in his motorized wheelchair and Dad was immediately jealous. "How the hell did he get that?" he blared to the whole waiting room. "I want one of those!" Even the guy in the motorized wheelchair was laughing. He was there for his annual physical once, when an absolutely model-beautiful black nurse came out to call him back for his exam. I stayed in the waiting room as she pushed him away in his wheelchair. Afterward I pushed him down to the lab for his blood and urine samples, and while we were waiting he leaned over and confidentially blared to the whole area, "Was that black nurse good looking?" I looked at my mostly-blind, mostly-deaf, 100-year-old father as the whole area waited for my answer, and replied, "Oh yeah, she was hot, Dad." "Thought so. I still got peripheral vision."
Dad passed away this past August at age 101 and it still hurts.
Mine passed away on April 15, 2020 at 90. Still hurts. I know how you feel.