Columbia’s Cons: Ivy League social work program run by team of former prisoners

Columbia’s Cons: Ivy League social work program run by team of former prisoners. Welcome to Conlumbia University where the ex-inmates run the asylum. Here your child can earn a Masters Degree in Criminalism, with available minors in Bomb-Making, Domestic Terrorism, Kidnapping, Extortion, Bank Robbery, Cyber-Crime, ID Theft or Murder Techniques. We also have an on-site bail bondsman who can assist if your child gets caught on a field trip. With a degree in Criminialism, your child will be able to hold his or her head high when walking the cell block. We also offer post conviction correspondence degrees in Prison Smuggling, Bribing Prison Guards, Prison Pimping, Prison Gangs and Their Nuances and How to Fake Various Diseases So You Can Take a Vacation at the Prison Hospital for a Few Days.