Which Democrat are you? Take the quiz and see which Democrat you most resemble. We surmise no one’s like Barack Obama because there’s nothing about lightbringing and sort-of-godliness in any of the questions (also nothing about golf or red lines either.)
This post was last modified on January 26, 2021
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What, you mean theirs no "D. None of the above"?
I tried to take the test, but there was only one question that had an answer I could check, the favorite movie one, I checked The Godfather and came up Domenic Recchia.
That's who I came up too! But did answer them all, including, yes, The Godfather.
Not a valid test. The "what is your favorite movie" question does not include 'An Inconvenient Truth' and other enviroscare favorites as options. And no questions on race or gays?
"JESUS AND THE DEMOCRAT"
A Republican, in a wheelchair, entered a restaurant one afternoon and
asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Republican
looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over there?"
The waitress nodded "yes," so the Republican requested that she give Jesus
a cup of coffee, on him.
The next patron to come in was a Libertarian, with a hunched back. He
shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down,
and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the
restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus, over there?"
The waitress nodded, so the Libertarian asked her to give Jesus a cup of
hot tea, "My treat."
The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Democrat on crutches.
He hobbled over to a booth, sat down, and hollered,
"Hey there honey! How's about getting me a cold mug of Miller Light?" He
too looked across the restaurant and asked, "Isn't that God's boy over there?"
The waitress nodded, so the Democrat directed her to give Jesus a cold beer.
"On my bill," he said loudly.
As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Republican, touched him, and
said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Republican felt the strength come back into
his legs, got up, and began to praise the Lord.
Jesus passed by the Libertarian, touched him, and said, "For your
kindness, you are healed."
The Libertarian felt his back straightening up, and he raised his hands,
and he too began to praise the Lord.
Then, Jesus walked towards the Democrat, just smiling. The Democrat jumped
up and yelled, "Don't touch me ... I'm on disability."
For Those Who Understand, No Explanation Is necessary.
For Those Who Do Not Understand, No Explanation Is Possible.
That's the gag in Life of Brian!
EX-LEPER
Alms for an ex-leper!
BRIAN
Did you say "ex-leper"?
EX-LEPER
That's right, sir, 16 years behind a veil and proud of it, sir.
BRIAN
Well, what happened?
EX-LEPER
Oh, cured, sir.
BRIAN
Cured?
EX-LEPER
Yes sir, bloody miracle, sir. Bless you!
BRIAN
Who cured you?
EX-LEPER
Jesus did, sir. I was hopping along, minding my own business, all of a sudden, up he comes, cures me! One minute I'm a leper with a trade, next minute my livelihood's gone. Not so much as a by-your-leave! "You're cured, mate." Bloody do-gooder.
BRIAN
There's no pleasing some people.
EX-LEPER
That's just what Jesus said, sir.
Good joke!
What joke? I saw that happen in person!
I tried to take the test, but my micro-aggression got in the way...
Fascist!
Which Democrat are you?
If I were a caring Democrat I'd be the one that committed suicide.