Woman’s new phobia of bananas is completely justified. “…when I had a closer look [at the bananas] I saw some funny looking spots…and was horrified to see they were spiders. They were hatching out on the table, scurrying around on my carpet.” Deadly venomous spiders, in fact. The moral is when choosing bananas or presidents, it behooves you to look them over closely.
This post was last modified on January 26, 2021
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I like your comment comparing picking presidents like fruit, look them over more than once. Like picking your favorite puppet. Ha.
I had this bump on my forehead. I picked at it and it popped. Hundreds of tiny spiders came scrambling out of the tiny hole. I freaked at first, but once I realized they thought I was their momma, I chilled out and wound up naming them all. It was hard to tell them apart at first and hurt like a btich the first time they found my nipple and tried to nurse. Our cat went apeshit and killed them all though.
Ok, I made some of that up.
You need to stop eating chocolate before you go to sleep.
Clearly I need to give up huffing paint fumes AND chocolate.
But, PLEASE continue your fascinating translations of Oblivious' posts!
"The moral is when choosing bananas or presidents, it behooves you to look them over closely"
In that case I'll take my chances with the spiders, I can stomp them.
Democrats are pretty squishy, you should be able to stomp them too.
But they are like roaches, they make a cracking sound and you think they're dead, but when you lift your foot, they run like hell.
TIP
Were these bananas in New Mexico, too? http://benswann.com/police-search-for-non-existent-drugs-by-forcing-man-to-undergo-enemas-cavity-searches/#ixzz2jnW8012K
Walmart Parking lots are private property. They had no probable cause to pull him over in the first place.
Actually Rose, parking lots are quasi public. Police do have authority to pull a person over in them. They also enforce laws such as handicapped parking and fire zones.
I just read about that. He's got about a dozen different lawsuits going now, the police, the county, several officers individually, the hospital, and the doctors. I hope he doesn't blow all the money he's going to be getting.
OK I know this isn't really here about the bananas, but this IS from The Sun --
and an ANCIENT urban legend . . . just sayin' . . .
Sounds like some commodity brokers sold short on banana futures.