Category: News New Format

States go after unclaimed property, use it to patch budgets. Next up: States go after claimed property, use it to buy more votes.

DOJ Official Praises the Southern Poverty Law Center’s Work in Combating Domestic Terrorism: As the Southern Poverty Law Center has inspired more than anyone’s fair share of “domestic terrorism” it seems a honest and beneficial Department of Justice would spend more time investigating them than praising them. Unfortunately, as is all to clear, we don’t have a Department of Justice that is honest or that is beneficial. At least not one that is beneficial in any equitable way.

Former Defense Secretary Makes Startling Claim About Joe Biden’s View of the Military. Ray Bans and a leather flight jacket do not a Commander-in-Chief make.

Conflict of Interest..Elijah Cummings is Knee Deep in IRS Scandal. He should be knee deep in shit, but being a member of the Congress Club will get him a free get out of jail card.

U.S. confirms October 10 missile test violated Iran nuclear deal. But wait, it gets worse: the missile test not only violated the new deal that’s not in place yet, it violated the old deal that’s been in place since 2010.

‘Family Guy’ creator: Sanders won the debate. If his position on Citizens United is any indication Bernie Sanders is far more interested in banning debates than he is in winning them. But thats just the sort of thing we’ve come to expect from everybody’s favorite rich, white, brown-people-hating, nationalist, socialist senator from Vermont.

2015 Antarctic Maximum Sea Ice Extent Breaks Streak of Record Highs. Global cooling here we come, right back where we started from.

Confederate flag supporters indicted under Georgia terrorism law: These morons should have joined the Black Lives Matter movement instead. Then they could have practiced “terrorist acts” to their hearts content with not just impunity from the state but its encouragement as well.

Investigation into Hillary’s email server focuses on Espionage Act and could get her 10 years in jail as FBI agent says she could be prosecuted just for failing to tell Obama: Hillary in the White House for four years or the big house for ten? The right choice seems obvious enough to us.

RETIRED TRUCK DRIVERS TO GET 50% PENSION CUTS. It appears the union label is getting pretty tattered. We’d wager the proliferation of non-union trucking companies has caused the funds depletion as there aren’t enough younger working members to pay for the retirees. Perhaps the Social Security Administration can fix it? No? How about Bernie Madoff?

France’s top weatherman sparks storm over book questioning climate change. Modern day version of burning Joan of Arc at the stake.

California Lieutenant Governor wants to do background checks…on ammo.  Lt. Governor Alcoholic-Cheater, just the guy to be telling everyone else what to do,

Scientists may have spotted alien artifacts orbiting distant star. The suspicious debris is approximately 1,500 light years away in the Cygnus constellation (above), so resolution is not optimum, but hey, it’s about time we found our first monolith.

Illinois delays pension payments; out of money. Should read ‘out of other people’s money.’

Democrat debate had eight million fewer viewers than Republican debate. But give it another year. By then Boehner and McConnell will have evened things out.

Who was that glowing-blue man in the Democrat debate audience? Some people are suggesting he was a wizard from Harry Potter’s world or from Middle-earth, but we at IHTM came to a different conclusion: given the average age of the Democrat field, he’s probably a candidate’s grandson.

The CNN Democrat Debate’s Meme? Free shit!

Naked woman goes berserk and trashes sandwich shop. In her defense, she isn’t the first woman to misunderstand that Subway footlong promise.

Senior European diplomat: “My government believes Obama is quite mentally unwell.” No shit, Sherlock.

MEXICAN NATIONALS ENSLAVED YOUNG GIRLS FOR SEX TRAFFICKING IN TEXAS. Look! Another one of Jeb!s acts of love.

HILLARY CLINTON VIEWS ‘REPUBLICANS’ AS ‘ENEMIES.’ I you want another 4 years of divide and conquer vote for Hillary.

Hillary Clinton Was Asked How She Would Be Different From Obama. Take a Look at How She Answered. Playing the vajayjay card over the mangina card.

AP FACT CHECK: Clinton, Sanders revise history in Dem debate. They both tied for the Nobel Pinocchio Award.

Best and worst Playboy Magazine covers of all time. Showing the deterioration in manly standards between December 1953 and November 2009. Hopefully, they stop publishing before Hillary makes the cover.

Lena Dunham says abuse on Twitter helped her appreciate Instagram: If you think its tough being Lena Dunham on twitter imagine how hard it must be for the Oberlin Republican named Barry that she falsely accused of rape.