Author: Bonfire of the Absurdities

Democrats plan all-night “talkathon” on climate change. “The Democratic effort is cause for some confusion because these senators are calling for action in a chamber they control but without any specific legislation to offer up for a vote, or any timetable for action this year.” It’s a new low in transparent manipulation, even for these people.

Kerry urges US envoys to make climate change a priority. Remember the bad old days when the Secretary of State’s priority was trivial stuff like foreign policy? Let us Putin this another way: if the US doesn’t take its foreign policy seriously, no one else will has.

IRS caves on Lois Lerner documents. “If there’s not a Holy Grail email in this round of documents, then we’re not going to find it.” We’d have more confidence Congress is getting everything if the data had been released by a 3rd party, a la the Climategate or NSA stuff. Unless they’re slow Lerners, 8 months of stonewalling is plenty of time for IRS bureaucrats to dispose of anything really incriminating.

Juan Williams: Treatment of Condi Rice by Rutgers a hateful liberal double standard for black conservatives. “Black Americans must be obedient liberals on all things or risk being called a race traitor or an Uncle Tom.” Juan, they don’t even have to get off a plane, they just gotta say “I’m not voting Democrat.”

The woman who “can leave her body at will”. “…strange brain activity involved in out-of-body experiences.” Oddly enough, no brain activity is involved in politicians’ out-of-mind experiences. (Did we say “oddly”?)

DNC attendees can’t name a single Hillary accomplishment. What difference does it make?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a__A4fO7egs

Nearly 10,000 Las Vegas Casino workers might go on strike over ObamaCare. “The biggest hurdle to reaching settlements in Vegas is the new costs imposed on our health plan by Obamacare… Even though the president and Congress promised we could keep our health plan, … unless the law is fixed, that won’t be true.” Can’t wait to hear Harry “Koch head” Reid call them all liars.

School forces half-naked, sopping wet student to stand outside, frostbite results. So what did she do, bite her arugula into the shape of an AK-47? Not this time: “A Minnesota public high school was so committed to obeying its fire drill policy to the exact letter of the law that it forced a female student–dressed only in a swimsuit, and sopping wet–to stand outside in the freezing cold for ten minutes.” Skool! Where dey teech stoodents to tink!

Chevron wins RICO case over Ecuador shakedown artists. “The wrongful actions of Donziger and his Ecuadorian legal team would be offensive to the laws of any nation that aspires to the rule of law, including Ecuador – and they knew it.” Didn’t know that stuff still mattered in Obamerica…

Joe Biden Staff: “Harry Reid Can Go F*CK Himself!” The backstory is the Senate defeated a controversial Obama nominee to head the DOJ’s now-Orwellian-titled “civil rights” division, with 7 Democrats joining the Republicans in voting “NO!” Obama wanted this bozo confirmed but Biden decided he didn’t want to have to defend casting the tie-breaking vote come 2016 and started working behind the scenes to get him defeated. When Harry Koch Reid called Biden’s office to find out what the hell was going on, the words we love to hear were uttered.

Obama said to allow two-year renewal for old health plans. Sure, that’ll work – insurers are just dying to do a truckload of legal busy-work to re-establish plans that they’ll be cancelling again in two years. It’s not just Obama’s foreign policy that’s based on fantasy.

House to vote on making fine for disobeying Obamacare individual mandate $0. Sure, Harry “Koch on the Brain” Reid will never let it come to the Senate floor and King Putts would veto it anyway, but so what? Why not just do a “Deem and Pass” thingy like the Kleptocrats did? King Putts doesn’t follow the law, why the hell should anyone else. Exemptions for everyone, not just the 1%!

NJ teen sues parents for college tuition. “…she says they threw her out of the house when she was 18”, while dad says “daughter voluntarily left home in October because she didn’t want to abide by the rules, such as keeping a curfew and doing household chores.” If Obama had a another daughter… ah, the hell with it.

Lois Lerner fears for her life if she testifies at Wednesday’s oversight hearing. “Ms. Lerner has been the subject of numerous threats on her life and safety, and on the life and safety of her family. I left with the staff recent evidence of those threats.” It’s the Chicago way.

Cuddly liberal Alan Grayson accused of shoving and injuring estranged wife in domestic incident. Don’t expect to see this on the “news” ’cause he’s a (sssh!) Democrat: “That must also be why, per Guy Benson, the Sentinel doesn’t mention his party affiliation until the 23rd paragraph of a 25-paragraph story.” BTW, here he is from 2012, talking about a war of some sort…

Kerry: Russia may be pushed out of G-8. “He warned that Russia would also find itself isolated, facing asset freezes, visa bans and disruption of normal trade routines.” Sec’y of State Herman Munster takes time out from his important work on yachting and climate change to shake a fist in the general direction of Russia.

Obama administration lets anti-gay Muslim leader into U.S. “Even as the Obama administration denounced what it called anti-gay legislation in Arizona and the president sat out the Sochi Olympics because of Russia’s crackdown on same-sex couples, the State Department allowed an Islamic preacher who called for the death penalty for homosexuals into the country for a tour of hate.” How many sides of your mouth can you talk out of at the same time, eh bro?

Obama skips National Security team meeting on Russia, Ukraine. Maybe if they had held it on a golf course… Sorry bro, the NCAA tourney is coming up! Did he at least send his empty chair?

The Ukraine mobilizes. Jihadis in Central Europe, Nazis with nukes and the Chinese getting involved: “The heat from the approaching fire is finally being felt through the high walls surrounding both Brussels and Washington. The elites are beginning to pay attention. For some it will be their first contact with reality.” BTW, fools like Sarah Palin and Mitt Romney warned about this years ago, the dopes.

The uninsured like Obamacare less and less. “The Kaiser poll now finds that amongst the non-elderly uninsured, 54% say they do not approve of the health law while only 22% say they favor it, a split of 34 points.” Liars! Tools of the Koch Bros! There, now you don’t have to endure another dreary clip of Dingy Harry.

Michelle Obama: America’s moms are “confused and bewildered,” “defeated” by grocery shopping. What confuses and bewilders us is how did humanity ever survive the last 10,000+ years before you showed up to explain these things, Moochy?

Obamacare victims are “liars,” says top Democrat. Well, in the former USSR, anybody who didn’t like the benevolent gubbermint policies was “crazy”. So there.

Greenpeace co-founder: No scientific evidence of man-made global warming. “…the Earth is in an unusually cold period and some warming would be a good thing.” From the comments: “…no theory worth its’ salt, needs to be protected from others’ right to question, challenge, or discuss it.” Yeah, but certain political theories seem to need that a whole lot.

Biden says Voter ID laws evidence of “zealotry” and “hatred”. Ironically, as the article notes, the warm-bucket-of-spit’s alleged home state itself has voter ID requirements. Way to go, Slow Joe.

Florida Democrat: Without immigration reform, where will we get our landscapers and maids? Well, the entitled political class in medieval times simply captured people and forced them to do such jobs…