Author: CO2Insanity

Hmm. Turns out Karl Marx was just as smelly and personally useless as his modern-day acolytes! If they’d had Cheetos back then you can bet smelly old Karl would have lived on them.

‘TEN COMMANDMENTS’ RERUN BEATS JIM CARREY, TINA FEY & ‘GIRLS.’ Now THIS is funny!

COULD THIS LAWSUIT REALLY KILL ‘OBAMACARE’? Perhaps Justice Roberts is a lot smarter than everyone thought he was. If this case wins, it knocks the whole thing out of the ballpark, not just sections.

Obama Says “I am not a dictator! I am Emperor!” Dateline April 1, 2013. At this morning’s press conference Obama declared himself Emperor Nero II. He made Joe Biden Imperial Jester and immediately declared Sharia Law. He announced Biden will be replaced by George Soros who will have the new title of Vice Emperor Darth and that Janet Napolitano is now Generalissimo of Empire Security. He then refused to answer questions, muttered something about Imperial golf being the new official sport of the land, said he was late for his game and left. Jay Carny, now sporting a new toga announced Air Force One would henceforth be referred to as Chariot of the God 1 and then declared the press conference over. We thought you’d enjoy this story about fools on April Fool’s Day.

Why the Euro Is Doomed in 4 Steps. Just wait until New York, Illinois and California puke and see what happens here. Probably a bank robbery bail-in.

ON EASTER, GOOGLE HONORS CESAR CHAVEZ. Frankly, we’re surprised they didn’t have a picture of Obama on the cross, ready to be resurrected so he can go play golf.

Bank of Cyprus ‘haircut’ for big depositors detailed. Now that the EU has Cypress bending forward for 40%, they want them to bend over and spread ’em for 60%. Cypress should tell them to stuff it ala Iceland and watch the EU go into panic mode. We assume their politicians are as nutless as ours are and their next move will be to grab their ankles.

COMMON CORE USES SCIENTOLOGY VIDEOS TO TEACH STUDENTS THEY HAVE RIGHT TO FOOD, HOUSING, CLOTHING, MEDICINE, EVEN A JOB. We say the UN and Scientology are a fluke of the universe and have no right to be here.

CARREY: ‘FUX NEWS’ A ‘MEDIA COLOSTOMY BAG.’ Poor Carrey. Based on this comment he couldn’t win on a show titled: Are You Funnier Than a Third-Grader?

EPA to unveil plan to clean up tailpipe pollution that critics say would raise gas prices. Now the rest of the country can be like California. You will soon have to assume the position when you fill up your car.

State auditor: California’s net worth at negative $127.2 billion. Yet Jerry ‘Moonbeam’ Brown and his Sacramento Clown Circus still think we need to be blowing yet more billions upon billions on the Bullet Gravy Train to Nowhere.

THE NO. 1 THREAT TO TEXAS — AND IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH POLITICS OR ECONOMICS. Nope, it’s not all those ex’s running around and isn’t Ross Perot either.

Parody Video Makes Fun of Jim Carrey’s Anti-Gun Song. Gotta love it when someone strikes back at a Hollywood hypocrite.

California’s jobless claims rise by 3,000. Looks like Jerry Brown’s tax plan is starting to work it’s “magic.”

Cypriots show patience and pragmatism as banks reopen. Looks like the banksters experiment worked out just fine. They ripped off 40% of everyone who has deposits in excess of $100,000 Euros and all the sheeple have done is bend forward and take it. Watch for this coming to the country you live in soon.

Company releases new bacon-flavored condoms. Well, someone had to say it. This gives whole new meaning to the term ‘getting porked.’

Massive oil spill in Minnesota as freight train carrying haul from Canada derailed and spilled 30,000 GALLONS of crude. So tell us again envirotards: Why you don’t want the Keystone XL pipeline? It’s obviously much safer than rail.

Janet Napolitano: Immigrants Will Change Arizona From Red To Blue. Interesting that we have a treasonous pendeja running DHS. Can you spell voter fraud? (Meanwhile the ball-less Republicans do absolutely nothing).

IDENTIFYING TARGETS? NEWSPAPER PUBLISHES INTERACTIVE MAP SHOWING ALL PUBLIC SCHOOLS WITH NO SECURITY OFFICERS. This smells to us like they’re just begging for another nutcase to massacre more kids to further their anti-gun agenda. We pray no one uses this to do evil, but if they do, we hope the people who run this paper and Gannet are prosecuted as accessories to murder. This is tantamount to yelling fire in a crowded public place.

Medicare Has Stopped Paying For Diagnostic Tests. Death panels? We don’t need no stinkin’ death panels. We’ll just let everyone die! (Unless your last name is Garcia, Torres, Gonzalez….) We think we’ll start buying stock in coffin manufacturers, crematoriums and cemeteries.

Julia Pierson named first female director of the Secret Service after Colombia prostitution scandal. We bet there’s lots of Secret Service Agents who are very happy that Obama didn’t hire Lorena Bobbitt.

Huckabee: If the GOP switches on gay marriage, evangelicals walk. We think they already walked anyway. There was a large number of Republican voters who voted in 2008 who didn’t vote in 2012. We think they weren’t going to vote for a Mormon President and didn’t want to vote for Obama, Gary Johnson, Ron Paul or Roseanne Barr, so they plain didn’t vote. They probably gave the election to Obama. We say no one will really notice if they’re gone because in spite of all the noise they make, they’re never here when you need them anyway.

Tennessee lawmakers confused and fearful after mistaking mop sink installed in men’s room for a Muslim foot-washing station. Frankly, we would have guessed it was a douche station for Barney Frank.

Video shows dog belonging to Mark Kelly’s daughter attack sea lion. Perhaps the Kelly family shouldn’t have any guns. They can’t even control their dog.

Gun shop blocks Mark Kelly’s right to buy AR-15, citing political ‘intent. Not to mention hypocrite intent.