I HATE THE MEDIA ™

Corrupt former mayor right at home teaching at Harvard. Say what you like about JFK, but he no doubt would puke over this puke.

THE STUNNING THING OBAMA’S FORMER BODYMAN CLAIMS THE PRESIDENT DID DURING DAY OF BIN LADEN RAID. This is what you call a leader?

“Most people were like down in the Situation Room and [Obama] was like, ‘I’m not going to be down there, I can’t watch this entire thing,’” Love recalled during a Q&A at an Artists & Athletes Alliance event.

And playing Spades? Isn’t that racist?

NOW CNN WEIGHS IN: IS TED CRUZ ELIGIBLE TO BE PRESIDENT? Both Obama and Cruz have mother’s that were US Citizens and fathers who were not. We consider Obama’s birth certificate to be dubious at best, we assume Cruz’s is available to see. At least we know where Cruz was born, we’re not certain about Obama. Obama’s school records are sealed, we assume Cruz’s are or will be made available. It’s interesting how Obama’s situation is perfectly OK with the same MSM that’s already starting to excoriate Cruz. This seems to tell us that what unnerves liberals is a strong Tea-Party type and not the RINOs that Karl Rove wants to run.

WHITE HOUSE ISSUES ANOTHER OBAMACARE DELAY ON KEY MEASURE. We’re beginning to think Obamacare was designed to be a 4 year long distraction to keep everyone’s eyes focused upon it so the rats in Washington, DC can get away with murder.

JOURNALIST MICHAEL HASTINGS WAS INVESTIGATING CIA DIRECTOR JOHN BRENNAN BEFORE HE WAS KILLED IN FIERY CAR CRASH. Yep, that sure was an accident. Wasn’t it?

NOAA closes 600 ‘hot’ weather stations. Well, it looks like we’ll have less dystopian weather reporting from the government. This may be an upside of James Hansen retiring.

Swiss shop clerk says Oprah Winfrey is lying. “This is absurd. I would never say something like that to a customer. Really, never… I don’t know why she is making these accusations. She is so powerful and I am just a shop girl.” Poor girl doesn’t understand racial politics in the U.S. – where even the wealthy and powerful still want to pretend they’re victims.

Whistleblower says 400 U.S. missiles stolen in Benghazi. The stolen missiles are now in “the hands of some very ugly people,” says the whistleblower’s lawyer. No wonder the Obama administration is tight-lipped about Benghazi – when airliners are getting shot out of the sky and people start asking where Al Qaeda got the missiles, White House press conferences are gonna get very awkward.

Eric Holder caught lying. Again.

Federal judge strikes down another Bloomberg police state policy. He’s probably throwing a giant control-freak temper tantrum right now: federal judge Shira A. Scheindlin ruled that New York’s stop-and-frisk policy violates constitutional rights.

Chuck Schumer holds presser to warm people to check for ticks: Chuck Schumer warning us about blood sucking parasites? Looks like the Senator from New York really, really doesn’t like competition.

Meet Bill Killian, the asshat who sent an innocent man to prison for 15 years. And take a good hard look at what gun control by the federal government looks like.

MURAL OF GEORGE ZIMMERMAN SHOOTING TRAYVON MARTIN UNVEILED IN FLORIDA STATE CAPITOL. This painting should be named “Cognitive Dissonance.”

Largest conference ever devoted to female orgasm. This weekend, Friday through Sunday, in San Francisco. Sounds great – the “Stroking Clinics” sound especially edifying – but we heard a rumor that a conference devoted to male orgasm was supposed to run concurrently except the men arrived about noon Friday, were finished by 12:15, and then left town.

Better read the fine print, Mr. Bank! Our new hero: Sick of the fine print banks put into their credit card offers, a man in Russia added a bunch of his own fine print – like 0% APR and a $182,000 cancellation fee – then signed the offer and used the card for two years without making a payment. (Why should he with 0% interest?) So far the courts have sided with him.

Jason Richwine asks: Why can’t we talk about IQ? He wonders why journalists have a cow every time the subject arises. Short answer: Because journalists have very low IQs, Jason! And they’re sensitive about it! … Duh.

Famous atheist says Muslims peaked in the Dark Ages, haven’t done much since. Twitter row ensues.

Democrat senator from Hawaii threatened to molest a sheep in college? Sen. Brian Schatz belonged to a college fraternity that kept a sheep, intended for use in the fraternity’s initiation ceremony, locked in a closet with no food and water. During initiation, prospective members were told, “just give the sheep one poke” to pass the test, or refuse and be denied membership. We don’t know what choice Brian made – the sheep is unavailable for comment – but screwing barnyard animals would be good practice for a future Democrat politician.

Sharknado star Tara Reid goes on Discovery Channel to discuss sharks. She expounded enthusiastically about her belief that whales and sharks have sex… thereby producing whale sharks.

DID YOU CATCH THE PRESIDENT’S U.S. GEOGRAPHY FAIL ON LENO TUESDAY? Somewhere in those 57 states are Gulf of Mexico ports located on the Atlantic Ocean. Eleventy!

List of curious coincidences in Barack Obama’s life. An eye-opening tour de force that doesn’t even mention the curious coincidences involving his birth certificate or citizenship.

Obama rebukes Putin by punishing Sweden. Because Russia gave Snowden asylum, Obama has decided he will not meet with Vladimir Putin in Moscow after the Group of 20 economic summit in St. Petersburg. Instead, he will travel to Sweden… where the Swedes are probably wondering, “Hey, what did we do wrong?”

MITT ROMNEY OFFERS ADVICE TO GOP AMID EFFORT TO DEFUND OBAMACARE. Great. Get advise from losers. With Mitt Romney and Karl Rove giving advise the GOP is GUARANTEED to lose by a larger margin than last time.

The 7 Craziest Obamacare Conspiracy Theories: Like any agit-prop organ worth their salt Mother Jones will often pepper their posits with positions that are composed largely of straw. For this reason we will not address any of the specific “theories” they are claiming have been made. Instead we will suggest that one merely look to the past to find what we were once told were “conspiracy theories”. Ideas that you might not be able to keep your insurance provider. That resources will become scarce. That rationing will occur. That costs will skyrocket. That it will drive down employment. And now that these things are happening the proglodytes forget that they once called each and everyone of them a fantasy and a conspiracy theory. Now, of course, they claim that nobody could have seen these things coming.

Mother Jones: Another Reason Janet Yellen Should Run the Fed. We will go ahead and spoil the surprise for you. It is because she is a woman. Yes, Mother Jones figures that the person put in charge of nearly every aspect of your economic life should be determined on the basis of whether they have to sit down when they pee. We, however, figure something vastly differently. Mostly that you should be in charge of your own economic life. Sadly Mother Jones has no interest in freedom of choice. At least not when it comes to your body, property or labor.