I HATE THE MEDIA ™

The WaPo’s Bob Woodward says “The White House has a secret plan to win the election, and it’s complex and it’s secret…” Yep, Obama says he has a secret plan to win the election but we’ll have to vote for him to find out what it is. And why does this toxic, preening, empty suit still want the job he obviously sucks at? MATTHEWS: But this week’s big question: what is President Obama’s biggest goal on the world stage? WOODWARD: Win the election. We’d tell you more, but we have to go watch the dog chase his tail now.

Pat Buchanan: Occupy Wall Street will turn violent with colder weather. We don’t know if cold weather will be the catalyst but it does seem that the Whiney-Whine percent carries great potential to be violent. They are, after all, a group that wants to take property that doesn’t belong from them from people unwilling to give up what they’ve earned. Goals like that require violence to be achieved.

Elizabeth Warren to Western Massachusetts: “You know you’re not as landlocked as some parts of the state.” Shortly after making this statement Warren finalized paperwork for a purchase of some delightful ocean front property in Arizona.

Presidential hopeful Michele Bachmann appeared on ABC’s This Week today, and Christiane Amanpour put Bachmann on the defensive when she asked the candidate if her non-interventionist Libya position would mean she would have been okay with “hundreds of thousands” of dead civilians in the streets of Libya and Moammar Gadhafi still in power. Does this mean we can start calling Amanpour a chicken-hawk, war-monger and a neocon?

Snowstorm, Cold Makes Life In Zuccotti Park Difficult For OWS Protesters. In other news the Flea Baggers demands being met would make life difficult for productive members of the country. Especially the ones that make up the middle class.

Shootings and crime in NYC are going wild, mostly due to Mayor Nanny Bloomberg’s coddling of OWS. So what does nanny do? Push for gun control in Virginia! Bloomberg is a genius and everything he does is correct, so if bad sh*t is happening, it must be someone else’s fault (who does that remind you of?) As one Virginian put it, “He’s an arrogant bastard who shouldn t be meddling.” Well said.

Hamdi Nur, of Rochester, is appalled that any Muslim woman would be forced to take off her headbag (hijab). “It’s a command of god that goes with you wherever you are, whether your in jail or not, so whether in jail or out it doesn’t matter because it is a command from god,” said Nur. Maybe allah should have commanded her to stop raising money for terrorism and stay out of prison…

No wonder she’s strong! Father-of-two makes bodybuilding comeback… as a transgender woman. “This is me. I race cars and I love football. I may be a third hybrid.” Actual mileage may vary.

Underwater Lava: Eruptions Could Create New Island in the Canaries. OK, so where are all the warmers when an island rises above the sea? Oh, I forgot, they only believe in islands sinking due to global warming. Nevermind.

U.S. relaxes Canadian border checks as agents are told to stop searching buses, trains and planes for illegal immigrants. If you start noticing an influx of people with French accents who say ‘ehh’ after every sentence you’ll know whom to blame.

Why the latest eurozone bail-out is destined to fail within weeks. Fiddling while Rome burns: “the Italian government on Friday paid 6.06pc for 10-year money, up from just 5.86pc a month ago and a euro-era high. Such borrowing costs are disastrous, given that Rome must roll-over €300bn of its €1,900bn debt in 2012 alone. A default by Italy, the eurozone’s 3rd biggest economy, and the 8th largest on earth, would make Lehman look like a picnic.”

‘Our human rights have been violated’: Muslim students accuse Catholic University in 60-page dossier. “They have accused education chiefs of banning them from forming a Muslim student group and failing to provide prayer rooms without Christian symbols. The Office of Human Rights is investigating 60 pages of allegations against the private university in Washington DC.” No one could be this dumb. Is this another step in the Muslim takeover of America? We know what would happen if we went to a Muslim institution and pulled this crap.

Scientist whose climate change research on polar bears was cited by Al Gore will face lie detector test over ‘integrity issues.’ Did scientists lie and did polar bears die? It appears yes and no. This was all based upon 4 dead polar bears that weren’t even autopsied. More anthropogenic BS.

Boring rides, rusting tracks and foul toilets: Welcome to the North Korean funfair where FUN definitely isn’t an option (but at least the queues aren’t bad). Yes comrades, life is good in the worker’s paradise of North Korea. Don’t believe us? Watch this dummy. Still don’t believe us? Check out this state of the art cruise ship. Walt Disney would be….umm…appalled.

Teenager Passes Out Marrying Cow He Had Sex With. Just when you think it can’t get any weirder, someone exceeds your expectations.

Child marriages: 9-year-old flees hospital following acid attack. “A nine-year-old girl who was seriously injured following an acid attack by her ‘husband’ fled the DHQ Hospital in Jhang on Friday afternoon.” Muslim Love means not having to say you’re sorry for those burns over 46% of your 9 year old wife’s body.

Washington ready to negotiate with Mullah Omar. “Washington is ready to negotiate with Taliban leader Mullah Omar and now regards his involvement as crucial to the prospects for peace in Afghanistan, Hillary Clinton has said.” The man who sheltered Osama bin Laden as he plotted the September 11 attacks? Keep your friends close and your enemies closer – don’t get in bed with them! (apologies for mentioning Hillary in the same paragraph).

Boston communters complain Occupy Boston hogging train station toilets. “Commuters and merchants in South Station say they are fed up with Occupy Boston squatters who are hogging electrical outlets and taking sponge baths in bathroom sinks, turning the bustling terminal into a unsanitary locker room.” Remember to vote for Elizabeth Warren for Senate, folks!

MSNBC analyst: GOP sees Herman Cain as a “Black man who knows his place.” Ummm, what place would that be? 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue? Once again, the new Orwellian definition of “racist” is revealed to be “someone who does not vote Democrat.” Does MSNBC realize that being an “anal-yst” has nothing to do with being an “a$$hole”? Apparently not.

OWS vs. Tea Party We surmise no statistics were kept for “number of incidents of participants pooping in the streets in public”, but no need as OWS would also win that one in a walk…. make that, “would win in a squat.” Just a reminder, Elizabeth Warren created the intellectual foundation for column A.

Pelosi defends Obamacare waivers to 1,800 firms: “They’re small companies.” Uuuuh, did she say “companies” or “cronies”? In the age of Obafacism, we need a new word to describe state-favored enterprises: how about “cronpanies”?

Castro Valley Democrat charged with felony shoplifting. Ummmm……that wasn’t shoplifting, it was ummmm…..redistribution of wealth. Yeah! That’s the ticket!

Look who’s deciding American court cases. Looks like the sharia camel has its nose under some judges’ robes.

New poll finds Obamacare viewed favorably by 52% – of Democrats. Obama’s folly (well, his BIGGEST folly) hits a new low for this poll, 34% favorable vs. 51% unfavorable, “driven by waning enthusiasm for the law among Democrats, among whom the share with a favorable view dropped from nearly two-thirds in September to just over half (52%) in October.” Seems he can’t get his “message” thru to his own side now as well as us.

Good Grief… Leftie Hero Scott Olsen Is Founder of “I Hate the Marines Corps.com” & Is a Jew-Basher. Oops! The the MSM seems to have forgotten something. “Scott Olsen, the former Marine who was injured while rioting in Oakland on Wednesday night, is the founder of I Hate the Marines Corps.” Just a minor detail conveniently omitted in trying to make OPD look bad.