Author: Bonfire of the Absurdities

As problems mount, the siren song of magical thinking becomes ever more irresistable to feckless politicians and the voters alike. The reasons why it usually fails. If it, like Marxism, always fails, why do we keep doing it? As Thomas Sowell once remarked, what works is less attractive than what “sounds good.” Besides, dude, it’s magical! What part of “magical” don’t you understand, bro?

Most of the August UK rioters were at best repeat offenders and at worst career criminals, rather than the “desperate poor”, which will come as no surprise to those who noted that the looters were stealing TVs, iPhones and Nikes, rather than bread and warm clothing. Another glib Leftist meme gets blown to hell, but like Marxism itself, repeated failures don’t discourage these clowns from trotting out the same old, tired, WRONG crap every time. When you’re desperately trying to stop the implosion of a bankrupt ideology, keep flinging nonsense and hope some of it sticks.

Robert Redford, raaaaacist: “Since early August, three administration decisions — on Arctic drilling, the Keystone XL pipeline and the ozone that causes smog — have all favored dirty industry over public health and a clean environment. Like so many others, I’m beginning to wonder just where the man stands.” Like so many other Hollywood nitwits, Redford’s limos, private jets, air-conditioned mansion and heated pool apparently all run off unicorn farts. Oil is something he puts on arugula. Gas is something he passes after he eats arugula. But who are we to question a fellow raaaaacist? You show him, Bobby…. when you write your Obama 2012 campaign check, don’t get an erection. That’ll teach him.

Jay Carney gives the WH position on Teamster President Jimmy Hoffa’s “war” and “sons of bitches” comments: “The president wasn’t on stage, he didn’t speak for another 20 minutes, he didn’t hear it… Perhaps Obama ought to have his hearing tested as he didn’t hear the crap his buddy Rev. Wright spouted for the 20 years he sat in Wright’s church, either. Funny, Obama wasn’t in Afghanistan the night Osama was killed but he sure managed to hear about that and comment on it as well. Time for another Obama excuse: chronic convenient deafness: “I never heard the economy sucked!”

Although Obama has previously called for strategic government investments to stimulate the economy, only 37% of California voters said they favor such an approach. Instead, the Republican view — that slashing government spending to restrain the deficit will better lead to prosperity — was preferred by 49% of respondents, according to the survey sponsored by the USC Dornsife College of Letters, Arts and Sciences and The Times. Wow, Obamunism is such a failure even Californians are starting to notice. Obama’s “strategic government investments” is in reality a strategy for investing government money in his cronies’ bank accounts.

Swedish retail giant Ikea used political prisoners in East Germany as “slave labour” to make furniture, secret police files unearthed by a German broadcaster appear to show. Quoted in a Stasi file, Ingvar Kamprad, Ikea’s founder, said while he had no official knowledge of the use of prison labour, if it did indeed exist “in the opinion of Ikea it would be in society’s interests.” In 1942, Kamprad was a member of the New Swedish Movement, a fascist party supportive of the Nazis. Nazis and Commies, they go together like the Obamas and lavish taxpayer-funded vacations.

A Frenchman has been ordered to pay his ex-wife £8,500 in damages for failing to have enough sex with her during their marriage. The economies of Europe are collapsing but the enlightened gubbermints there can take time out from their busy schedule of FAILURE to diddle with married folks’ diddling. BTW, WHO defines how much is enough? Is it the same amount in Germany as in France or Belgium? Was the amount agreed to in the Maastricht Treaty? Does this give anyone a clue as to WHY Europe is failing? Anyone? Bueller?

Europeans are plagued by mental and neurological illnesses, with almost 165 million people or 38 percent of the population suffering each year from a brain disorder such as depression, anxiety, insomnia or dementia, according to a large new study. Before the utopia formerly known as the USSR fell apart like a poorly designed healthcare plan, the Soviet heaven on earth had the highest rate of alcoholism in the world. Folks who couldn’t afford potable booze drank brake fluid, anti-freeze and/or methanol. Let’s see… a spiritually, intellectually and economically bankrupt nanny state run by a bunch of self-stlyed technocratic elitist nitwits…. nah, must be a coincidence.

The election to replace Anthony Dick Weiner is thisclose. Dem candidate David Weprin has been running an “owl” campaign (Barack Whooo?) but Organizing for America director Jeremy Bird can’t take a hint. He sent out an email blast last week calling on Obama supporters to stump for his “strong ally” Weprin… Obama still under the delusion voters can’t get enough of him. With “friends” like Barack Obama, political enemies are redundant, just ask Jon Corzine or Martha Coakley.

An Iranian official has announced that U.S. filmmaker Michael Moore plans to visit Iran in autumn. “He has asked [for permission] to travel to Iran, and we are trying to invite him to the Cinema Verite,” said Deputy Culture Minister for Cinematic Affairs Javad Shamaqdari. “Trying to invite him” means they are having trouble rounding up the requisite number of cheesebugers. Will we be seeing a movie critical of the repressive Iranian regime entitled “Mahoud and Me”? Fat chance.

Fonda’s second husband, Tom Hayden, a Left-wing activist with a bulbous nose and acne-scarred cheeks, had forbidden her to have either a washing machine or dishwasher. Far too bourgeois. She couldn’t even wear her Cartier wristwatch any more, because Hayden disliked any show of possessions. So she’d replaced it with a cheaper Timex. Fonda “subjugated” herself to Hayden because she was so enthralled with his left-wing principles. This proves what we’ve said all along – these people really don’t have any brains whatsoever. Hayden fantasized that he was presidential material; at least we dodged THAT bullet.

“I’m talking about a jobs program of a trillion dollars or more. We’ve got to put Americans to work. That’s the only way to revitalize this economy,” Rep. Maxine Waters (D-CA) told NBC’s “Meet the Press.” Yeah, because the last trillion-dollar fiscal enema worked so well… at least for the pols and their cronies. who were like a bunch of pork-barrel pigs in you-know-what. Stuck on stupid? BTW, why is MTP talking to Waters about this stuff? Is Obama stuck in a quicksand trap or something?

“Our situation is extremely serious,” the postmaster general, Patrick R. Donahoe says. “If Congress doesn’t act, we will default.” Labor represents 80 percent of the agency’s expenses, compared with 53 percent at United Parcel Service and 32 percent at FedEx, its two biggest private competitors. Damn Al Gore for inventing the internet!

America’s 14 million unemployed aren’t just competing with each other for jobs, they’re also up against 8.8 million part-timers who want full-time work. When (if?) the economy improves, more competition may ensue as 2.6 million workers who have stopped looking return to the job market. Obama’s got the solution, another stale remake of “The King’s Speech.” Is hiring 25.4 million caddies for his next round of golf out of the question?

“If they [banks] don’t come up with loan modifications and keep people in their homes that they’ve worked so hard for, we’re going to tax them out of business,” Waters said. No need, Maxine, the FHFA is going to sue them out of business. BTW, is your husband still associated with the OneUnited Bank?

In 2005, the Supreme Court decision in Kelo v. New London upheld the city’s use of eminent domain to seize property from private owners and hand it over to a developer who promised more than 3,000 new jobs and $1.2 million in tax revenue. Not only has the city’s project failed with the 91 acre site sitting empty and overgrown with weeds, but New London has now designated the site as a dump for vegetation following Hurricane Irene. Arrogant politicians bully the people they’re supposed to be serving and end up falling flat on their stupid faces. Good.

The ancient cliché that “only losers join” is long dead now. The military is now a club that many want to join, but only few are good enough to get in. Back a few years ago, Commodore John Kerry of the Rhode Island Tax Free Yacht Club and Ketchup Tasting Society told an audience “You know, education, if you make the most of it, if you study hard and you do your homework, and you make an effort to be smart, uh, you, you can do well. If you don’t, you get stuck in Iraq.” Slap down! Percentage wise, there’s probably a lot more losers in congress (and the White House) than the military.

Feds set to sue banks for making bad loans the feds demanded they make. The Community Reinvestment Act, championed by the likes of Barney Frank and Barack Obama, required banks to lend money to people unlikely to pay it back. Now, the Feds are about to sue those same banks for making those same bad loans. A Democrat is someone who blows up a building and then sues the manufacturer for making a dangerous explosive, the builder for putting up a building for him to blow up and the police for failing to stop him. And if you point this irony out to him, he’ll say you’re blaming the victim.

Newly obtained emails show that the White House was better informed about Operation Fast and Furious than was previously known. The administration claims the emails don’t prove anyone in the White House was aware of the covert “investigative tactics” of the operation: “Yeah, we thought those guns were gonna be used by Mexican Civil War re-enactors!”

The U.N. nuclear agency said Friday it is “increasingly concerned” about a stream of intelligence suggesting that Iran continues to work secretly on developing a nuclear payload for a missile and other components of a nuclear weapons program. Iranian head nitwit Ahminadinnerjacket should expect a very strong letter of rebuke from the US’s top golfer. Unless, of course, he’s too busy working on his super-fabulous employment plan… “Hey, knock off the nuclear explosions, will ya? I’m tryin’ to create zillions of jobs in here!”

In what could be a way of lowering expectations for next Thursday’s big economic speech, aides to President Obama are privately spreading word that he will not present his entire jobs plan in his address to a Joint Session of Congress. No way he wants to lower expectations. If anything, Obama thinks his “plan” is so supercraptasticly cool that nobody but a rocket scientist like himself will be able to absorb all the drooly-dreamy fabulousity in one night. Besides, splitting it up will give the lumpenproletariat more chances to watch the thing they love most on TV: Barry reading off his teleprompters. Oooh, sign us up for more that.

Snowballs formed in hell today after control-freak President Barack Obama WITHDREW a controversial EPA regulation (yes, you read that right) designed to tighten smog rules. Apparently things are so BAD in the economy even Barack Obama has noticed. When it comes to his re-election, there’s NOTHING he won’t throw under the bus. Memo to Krugman, Friedman, et al: Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Employers add ZERO net jobs in August; unemployment rate unchanged That’s ZERO as in “no”, “nada”, “zilch”, “none whatsoever”, “not even a rumor of a job”. Unemployment rate? Unchange we can believe in. The prediction was for 70,000 jobs so the MSM will report “job creation narrowly misses expectation by a mere 70,000.” Just call him “President Zerobama.”

The “Obama Clock” iPhone app is a countdown to … his final days as President of the United States. In addition, the application will download and update the following important voter metrics: Approval Rating, Public Debt, Unemployment Level, Gasoline Cost Per Gallon, Housing Price Index This is an app Dante might’ve created to mark the time until he could escape the inferno. In that context, the app’s display of Obama’s visage is entirely apropos.

Democrats Distancing Themselves From Obama. The president’s dismal poll ratings, should they continue into next year, could sink Democratic hopes for reclaiming ground in the House and retaining control of the Senate — especially in battleground states and swing districts. Unemployment is what’s dragging the economy down and Obamacare is what’s keeping unemployment high. Congressional Dems could save their worthless butts and be heros by repealing Obama’s vastly unpopular signature curse. No brains, no guts, no nothin’.