Author: Bonfire of the Absurdities

Vice President Biden remarked to a Pennsylvania crowd that high faculty salaries were one of the reasons tuition costs were skyrocketing. The gaffe-tastic one blunders into the truth once again. Hey, Sheriff Joe, you should check out how much Lizzy Borden Warren is making at “Havaaad.”

Demonstrators protest bank opening on MLK Day, hand out leaflets “Dear TD Bank, you are defying the King holiday. Shame, Shame, Shame. This is a racist act. Shame, Shame, Shame.” Ummm, but aren’t the demonstrators themselves working on MLK day by demonstrating? Raaaaacist, protest thyself, eh?

The Keynesian School of Economics Leads to Violence. What happens when a continent runs out of makers and there’s little left for the takers to take? It’s not a change you wanna believe in.

Liz Warren said “No one gets rich on their own.” She herself relies on Harvard and government jobs to make her pile. Just like her idol, King Putt. Didja ever notice that the biggest boosters of big gubbermint are the ones that profit the most from it? Must be one of those “coincidences” we keep hearing about.

Huntsman to drop out of GOP race, endorse Romney. Media journolists (sic) hardest hit.

Look at this cover, what do you see? A crappy, leftist MSM has-been (who now writes for Newsweak) has forsaken the traditional progressive raaaaacist bilge for the more centrist and pedestrian pejorative, “dumb.” Yeah, it is a case of the slug calling the grasshopper “slow”, but a refreshing change of inanity nonetheless.

President Obama and his family headed out to church this morning for the third time in a month, the latest sign that the president may be using religion to boost his image as the campaign heats up. Nah, we’re sure this is all about seeking spiritual enlightenment – Barack is making himself available in case God decides to seek it.

This is not a “Vote-For” election. This is a “Vote-Against” election. This is not a “Sit-It-Out-And-Pout” election. This is a “Get-Obama-Out” election. That is what it is about and that is all it is about. Whether his eventual opponent is Romney, Newt or an empty cardboard box – the important thing is unelecting the unrelentingly lousy Obama and his clown car administration.

Nanny Bloomberg slanders victim of NYC’s hyper-active gun laws. Woman, licensed to carry in TN, tried to check her pistol at Ground Zero Memorial and was arrested. His Dishonor quipped, “Let’s assume that she didn’t get arrested for carrying a gun. She probably would have gotten arrested for the cocaine that was in her pocket.” (It turned out to be powdered aspirin.) Bloomers once wanted to run for president as a “no labels” candidate. We’re sure he’s got a lot of labels now.

CBS: 12 clean energy companies are having trouble after collectively being approved for more than $6.5 billion in federal assistance. Five have already filed for bankruptcy. Obama is the anti-Midas: any gold he touches turns to a foul-smelling brown substance. Failure on a scale you can barely believe in.

Punished for not crying: Thousands of North Koreans face labour camps for not being upset enough about death of Kim Jong-il. “The authorities are handing down at least six months in a labour-training camp to anybody who didn’t participate in the organised gatherings during the mourning period, or who did participate but didn’t cry and didn’t seem genuine.” Wonder if Jimmy Carter and the other celebutards who praised this place will join in the labor-training camp fun.

Only 10% of proceeds from Kim Kardashian’s charity auction actually goes to good causes (the rest heads straight into her bank account). Glenn Selig, President/CEO of Selig Multimedia: “Many times, the public assumes that all the proceeds go to charity and not the celebrity. But that is often not the case. The public should never assume that 100 percent goes to charity.” Sounds like she could have a great future in politics.

Advisory Board says LightSquared can’t coexist with GPS. The board said ain’t no way LightSquared is gonna work without screwing up GPS. In response, LightSquared said the test results reflect “bias and inappropriate collusion” because the PNT committee included non-government employees with ties to the GPS industry. In other words, it included people Obama doesn’t control. No fair.

Good news! Mass. crime victim won’t be prosecuted for stopping crime. Man sees his truck being broken into by armed druggie, man punches out druggie and stops crime, police arrest man. What’s wrong with this picture? Nothing, it’s Massachusetts! DA dropped charges, but said don’t do that again. As Sen. Martha Coakley once said, “In Massachusetts we try and discourage … self-help.”

Moore warns Obama: “There are enough pissed off people that will go somewhere else.” One percenter and the most famous film director in Iran, Michael Moore, feels taken advantage of by fellow one-percenter Barack Obama and warns him that his support could dry up. Moore says Barry could make amends by givin’ back all those dang Wall Street donations. BTW, can Moore’s vacation home be seen from space? Just curious.

Latest Obama blame target… Nixon! “President Obama, in announcing a restructuring proposal for the federal government, took a shot at a predecessor, President Richard Nixon — blaming him for the inefficient placement of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration within the Commerce Department.” Hey, when you come right down to it, this is all George Washington’s fault.

2006 Fed transcripts “clearly show some of the nation’s pre-eminent economic minds did not fully understand the basic mechanics of the economy that they were charged with shepherding.” Also: “The problem was not a lack of information; it was a lack of comprehension, born in part of their deep confidence in economic forecasting models that turned out to be broken.” No matter if it’s the Fed, Congress, the White House or whatever, it seems that down in Washington DC there’s no professors, just Gilligans.

Obama’s re-election campaign is considering moving the final day of the Democrat Convention to Bank of America Stadium to sell more skyboxes to wealthy donors. As President Tee Time once said, “sooner or later you’ve made enough money.” That’s YOU’VE made enough money, not him. Now that the MSM is tired of the OWS circus act, screw the 99% – the 1% are where the dough is. MORE cowbell and styrofoam Greek pillars!

Unemployment benefit applications jump to 399,000. And following all the glowing retail sales reports for Christmas, the actual numbers reported today show a mere .1% rise. Hey, remember last week when the U3 unemployment rate “fell” to 8.5% and the “good news” was all over the media like Adolf Hitler voter applications in Wisconsin? How many stories about this not-so-good news didja see today? We thought so.

There she goes again: Debbie the toxic chipmunk again tries blaming Tea Party for Jared Loughner’s insanity while ignoring OWS murders, rapes and street-crapping. A day without Debbie’s convoluted, venomous rants is like a day with sunshiine. Make that a month.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=zsUn3ltJnN8

PBS documentary looks at Bill Clinton’s career as well as his “personal struggles with fidelity.” Now that it no longer matters, PBS feels comfortable telling the truth about the Slickster (they also want to make sure that draft-Hillary talk remains just talk.) BTW, after Obama’s been out of office 10 yrs, expect PBS to notice he is a narcissistic, over-hyped empty suit with a lot of stupid ideas. Hopefully, they will do that program by 2023.

It’s a miracle! Dead people resurrect to vote in NH primary!
Voter ID? I don’t need no stinkin’ voter ID, I’m DEAD, dammit!

Obama jobs summit features numerous attendees disguised as empty chairs. The Fat Cat in Chief wanted to discuss “in-sourcing”, his term for “bringing jobs back to America from overseas” (the best way to do that would be to outsource his job.) Hey, if Obama gives a speech and nobody’s listening, does it still make a sound? Yeah, Splat!

Mercedes Benz rolls out Che Guevara to tout its new car-sharing initiative, “CarTogether.” Che once said “To establish Socialism rivers of blood must flow!” Wonder if Mercedes can find a place for that in their car-sharing campaign, like “To establish CarTogether rivers of blood must flow!” Cool, huh?

NYC’s Nanny Bloomberg sets his sights on booze. City Health Dept. proposes to slash the number of establishments that sell liquor as well as controlling liquor advertising. How long until this dope starts showing up on people’s doorsteps in a wig and a dress to admonish them to eat their vegetables?