Man wearing TIN FOIL to ‘prevent microwave signals from entering his head’ arrested for threatening to burn down four schools. Looks like we found a replacement for Alan Grayson (D-FL 9th District). If he ever gets out of jail he should immediately move to Floriduh and run for election in thre 9th District.
Could massive floods on Mars have caused climate change? New 3D maps suggest the red planet suffered major upheaval. We’re now waiting for Al Gore to come out with a new movie titled ‘An Inconvenient Flood.”
‘I don’t want to die, please don’t let me die’: Last words of Hugo Chavez revealed as medics admit president died of heart attack. Yet another brave dictator goes out like the coward he is.
Bin Laden’s son-in-law captured, charged in US with conspiring to kill Americans. OK, great we got him. Great he’s spilled the beans. But why’s he being charged in Federal Court in NYC? Another dog and pony show to distract the peons from the reality of Obama? We think it’s a moron move and endangers NYC with terrorist attacks. This guy should be locked away in GITMO. Where’s Mayor Nanny on this? Oh right, he’s worried about real problems like trans fat, big gulps and ear buds.
At GOP outreach dinner, Obama picks up the tab. Wanna bet tomorrow’s Obama expense reimbursement report gets turned into a national secret ala his birth certificate and college rercords?
Our Galactic Neighbor 40,000 Light-Years Closer To Milky Way Than Previously Believed. Hmmm, is this the same NASA that presumes to know what things like the temperature, weather and sea-level will be 100 years from now? Now that’s funny.
Gore sued over Current TV sale to Al Jazeera. Al will no doubt find some way to blame this on global warming.
BREAKING: Anti-Second Amendment Legislator’s Criminal Record Exposed. “According to a Colorado Bureau of Investigations report obtained by Media Trackers, State Representative Rhonda Fields (D-Aurora) was arrested in 1976 on a charge of larceny and again in 1991 on a charge of shoplifting.” Great qualifications for an entry level Democrat! Other people’s money! She probably just wants to ensure next time she or her Democrat buddies rip someone off they won’t get shot in the butt. H/T DefHarryMelon
Chief witness in Trayvon Martin case lied under oath. At this point we have to ask: Why are the idiots at the DA’s office continuing to persecute prosecute Zimmerman? There’s too many lies, obfuscation and evidence withholding to ever get a jury of 12 to convict.
Florida bill would require anger management courses for bullet buyers. We have a better idea. How about all people in public office, regardless of their position, be required to take a course on the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, and if they’re state officials, be required to take an additional course on their state’s constitution?
WAPO BUSTS WHITE HOUSE IN ANOTHER SEQUESTER LIE. This reminds of of one of Aesop’s fables.
The President Who Cried Sequester
There once was a man named Obama who was bored as he sat on Capitol Hill watching the village sheeple. To amuse himself he took a great breath and sang out, “Sequester! Sequester! The sequester is going to cause massive problems for you sheeple!”
The villagers came running up Capitol Hill to help Obama drive the sequester away. But when they arrived at the top of Capitol Hill, they found no sequester problems. Obama laughed at the sight of their angry faces.
“Don’t cry ‘sequester’, Obama,” said the villagers, “when there are no sequester problems!” They went grumbling back down Capitol Hill.
Later, Obama sang out again, “Sequester! Sequester! The sequester is causing massive airport delays for the sheeple!” To his naughty delight, he watched the villagers run up Capitol Hill to help him drive the sequester away.
When the villagers saw no airport delays they sternly said, “Save your frightened song for when there is really something wrong! Don’t cry ‘sequester’ when there are NO sequester problems!”
But Obama just grinned and watched them go grumbling down the hill once more, then headed for the golf course.
Later, he saw REAL sequester problems that would affect his flock. Alarmed, he leaped to his feet and sang out as loudly as he could, “Sequester! Sequester!”
But the villagers thought he was trying to fool them again, and so they didn’t come.
At sunset, everyone wondered why Obama hadn’t returned. They went up Capitol Hill to find Obama. They found him weeping.
“There really was a sequester here! Michelle can’t go on vacation! Biden has to take AMTRAK! I have actually PAY for my golf games! I can’t go on endless campaign trips and have to stay in Washington, DC! I cried out, Sequester! Why didn’t you come?”
And the moral to the story? “You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time.” Abraham Lincoln.
Mayor Bloomberg’s new health crusade: too-loud earbuds. Another day, yet more BS from the world’d greatest control freak.
BIDEN IS ‘DUMB AS AN ASHTRAY’: THE BEST PARTS FROM THE ‘VANITY FAIR’ PREVIEW OF THE NEW ROGER AILES BIOGRAPHY. As for President Obama, he’s “lazy.” When Hollywood makes a movie about Obama perhaps they can call it Dumb & Lazy.
Sean Penn on Hugo Chavez’s death: ‘I lost a friend.’ OK, so here’s Sean. Yes, Sean, probably the only friend you have outside of Oliver Stone. So who’s ahead in the Hugo ass kissing contest? Sean or Jummuh?
Jimmy Carter remembers Chavez for his contributions to the ‘neglected and marginalized.’ Jimmuh must still think he’s in the POTUS chair in the Oval Office. So far he appears way ahead of the pack in the Hugo ass kissing contest. We’re still waiting to hear from Sean Penn, though.
REVEALED: HOLDER SAYS PRESIDENT COULD AUTHORIZE MILITARY DRONE STRIKES INSIDE U.S. IN EMERGENCY. First it was on foreigners, then on US citizens outside the US, now it’s US citizens inside the US. Seems to be a very slippery slop here. What’s next? Drone strikes OK on Republicans?
Scenes from the Sequestrocalypse: TSA to spend $50 million on new uniforms. Funny that she threatened everyone about sequester cuts yet she has $50 million to blow. We wonder if the new uniforms will be brown with little SS lightning bolts on the collars?
INTERNAL GOVERNMENT EMAIL: MAKE SEQUESTER CUTS AS PAINFUL AS POSSIBLE. Typical Democrat tactic. Meanwhile we don’t hear of any delays at airports or a mass exodus across the southern border. More BS from the Obama administration.
Hugo Chavez dead. Hugo’s never looked so good!
NAPOLITANO BLASTS MEDIA FOR EXPOSING ILLEGAL ALIEN CRIMINAL RELEASE. Looks like fat cockroaches hate the light. She needs to visit the Roach Hotel.
Ice-Free Antarctic, Arctic Predictions in the Toilet. Eeek! There will be no ice in 2020! No it’s 2025! No it’s 2050! No it’s 2100! Well, sometime in the future! How’s that for some real scientific accuracy?
Mayor Bloomberg’s go-to adjectives for bad ideas: ‘dumb’ and ‘stupid’. If anyone should know a stupid idea when he hears one, the king of stupid ideas should.
Beat the press. It’s not only Bob Woodward being abused by the Obama administration. “In an e-mail, they called her the vilest names — b..ch, c–t, a–hole.” Real class act these Obama thugs, eh?
‘Are we just going to let this lady die?’: Dispatcher’s desperate plea for nurse give CPR to save elderly woman, 87, after caretaker refused. Never mind. Nothing to see here. Just practicing for Obamacare.
