Author: J.P. Travis

Biden claims he played on the University of Delaware football team. He didn’t. He made the claim during a campaign stop in Ohio where they take football kind of serious, so the lie probably didn’t help his cause. For Joe’s sake, we hope he doesn’t follow up with jokes about hairless nuts.

State Dept. hired small British firm with no experience to protect Benghazi consulate. Then the manager of the contract flew out of Libya hours before the attack, leaving his employess with nothing but tasers and handcuffs to defend themselves. Something stinks in the Clinton world again and this time it’s not Bill’s cigar collection.

Racist, perverted, misogynist Reddit troll exposed by Gawker. He posted with the ID “Violentacrez,” his real name is Michael Brutsch, that’s his picture, and he’s worried about losing his job now that his identity is known. After starting forums with names like “Creepshots,” “Jailbait,” “Chokeabitch,” “N*****jailbait” (at IHTM we have standards), “Rapebait,” and more than 400 others, he isn’t getting much sympathy.

Another silly Peace Prize from Norwegian leftists. They gave the Peace Prize to the European Union for maintaining peace “for over six decades.” Never mind the awkward fact that the EU wasn’t formed until 1993, never mind that it’s currently imploding financially, and never mind that it was NATO, at enormous cost to the United States, that maintained peace in Europe since Word War II.

State Dept. security chief says, “We had correct number of assets in Benghazi… at time of 9/11 for what had been agreed upon.” As for whether the attackers were terrorists (or irate YouTube watchers), Deputy Assistant Secretary of State Charlene Lamb tells congressional investigators, “I have just presented the facts. I am not making any judgments on my own.” But, gee whiz, isn’t that what they pay you for, Princess?

Hundreds of British hospital patients accidentally died from lack of food and water last year. Remember Donald Berwick? He’s the egghead Obama recess-appointed as Administrator of the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services because he “loved” the NHS and thought it was a model the U.S. should copy.

Norwegian scientists say electric cars NOT good for the envronment. This is pretty much what we’ve all been thinking so it’s probably good science. After all, you have to make noxious batteries and then charge the damn things with electricity generated by burning coal, right? One caveat: these are Norwegians… the same people who gave Nobel Peace Prizes to Jimmy Carter, Al Gore, the IPCC, and Barack Obama.

Sometimes we forget… that leftists and Islamists are natural allies. Both belief systems require government control and anti-semitism to flourish. Meet Greta Berlin, founder of the Free Gaza Movement, who provides a timely reminder: “Zionists operated the concentration camps and helped murder millions of innocent Jews,” Tweeted Greta on September 30… before apologizing and claiming the Tweet was intended for her private Facebook friends. Which apparently makes it okay.

U.S. military ordered Royal Marines not to shoot Taliban. U.S. commanders were afraid noisy night operations with all the rude nasty bright lights might disturb local Afghans who were trying to sleep. So Sergeant Peter Rayner (above) watched with night vision goggles as the enemy planted IEDs and wasn’t allowed to fire on them. A few days later, Sergeant Rayner was blown up by an IED.

This is Colleen Lachowicz. Colleen is a Democrat candidate for state senate in Maine. She’s also the rogue orc Santiaga in World of Warcraft, where she goes around stabbing people in the back and poisoning them. “I’m a level 68 orc rogue girl. That means I stab things… a lot,” says Colleen proudly. So basically, being a Democrat, her real world and online personas are in harmony.

How bad is the financial crisis in Italy? Venice wants to secede. They say they’re sending tons of money to Rome and not getting much back. Let’s hope Texas, Alaska, and North Dakota don’t pick up on this idea.

Daily Kos accuses Romney of using cheat sheet. The Romney campaign says it was a handkerchief and if the libtard “journalists” at Daily Kos had bothered to watch the rest of the debate they would have seen Mitt wipe his nose with it.

Facebook reaches one billion users. Here’s the math: one billion regular users times fifteen updates per month each (average) equals way too many cute cat photos, way too many “I’m going to bed now! Goodnight Facebook!”s, and way too many people you don’t like in real life trying to be your friend online.

Chris “Thrill up my leg” Matthews unhappy with Obama’s debate performance. “I don’t know what he was doing out there!” raged the thrillmeister. “Obama should watch MSNBC. He will learn something every night on this show and all these shows.” B.B. King described this situation perfectly.

Government health care – another encouraging example. In Australia the government distributed a poster of the female body that has the esophagus running into the lungs, put the pancreas inside the stomach, and seems to show the bladder sitting atop the uterus… among other things. Meanwhile the brain is a small saucer sitting above the hairline which is reasonably accurate for a government bureaucrat.

Rappers have angry fight at BET Hip Hop Awards. Rick Ross (pictured above) and Young Jeezy got in a shoving match backstage… probably not because Mr. Jeezy was jealous of Mr. Ross’s sexy physique. Then a bodyguard went to the parking lot, got a gun out of his car, and started firing. The show resumed shortly afterward because, hey, this is hip hop we’re talking about, not the MacArthur Foundation.

Charismatic Henrique Capriles giving Hugo Chavez a run for his money. The elections are this coming Sunday and not only does Capriles look like a serious threat to beat Chavez, he promises to stop giving Venezuela’s oil to Cuba and stop the cozy relationship with Iran. The most worried man in Venezuela? Capriles’ life insurance agent.

Katie Couric voted Worst Reporter in History of Man. She barely edged out Dan Rather. Apparently the voters forgot about The Wall Within, which puts Rather in his own league.

Joe Scarborough mocks Romney for something that didn’t happen. First Thomas Roberts, then Chris Matthews, now Morning Joe. Let’s call it The Week Of Stupid at MSNBC. Or not… “every week at MSNBC” would be just as accurate.

Democrats darken photo of Mia Love for campaign mailer. This is the opposite of what the media did with Trayvon Martin’s photo. According to liberal reasoning, lighter is good, darker is bad, so this should hurt the Republican’s chances of getting votes. But remember, conservatives are the racists.

Matt Damon anti-fracking movie financed by oil-rich United Arab Emirates. It’s always a conundrum for Hollywood leftists when their anti-Americanism collides with their anti-capitalism. For Mr. Damon the issue was resolved by using foreign oil money to create a propaganda film attacking the energy extraction method which threatens to make America energy independent.

Reuters and AP publish photo of Israel’s prime minister frozen in Heil Hitler salute. Both wire services, supposedly acting independently, decided that showing Benjamin Netanyahu in this pose was ethical journalism.

North Carolina hog farms importing 826,733 tons of corn from Brazil. Meanwhile, thanks to Global Warming alarmists and liberal pipe dreams, the U.S. will turn 4.3 billion bushels of corn into ethanol for automobile gas tanks in 2012. This is what Mugabe did to Zimbabwe – turned a food exporter into a food importer.

Thomas Roberts is as dumb as Chris Matthews. We talked about Chris Matthews getting the unemployment rate wrong Friday night. Earlier that same day, his MSNBC colleague made a fool of himself insisting that Obama didn’t enjoy a Democrat-controlled Congress for two years. It’s like they’re putting stupid pills in the MSNBC water coolers.

Obama fills 5,000-seat arena with 18,000 people. On Saturday Obama gave a speech in Milwaukee’s BMO Harris Pavilion. Media sources like The Wall Street Journal and Politico wrote that 18,000 people attended… but the pavilion only holds 5,000. And there were empty seats. Journalism: the oldest profession.