Author: J.P. Travis

Desperate to sell Volts, GM makes cheaper version with weaker batteries. Who was the marketing guru who decided 38 miles per charge was too far?

Obama girl burns Obama T-shirt from 2008. She explains her metamorphosis from Obama lover to Obama hater:

“Mr. Obama, you are the biggest fraud that has ever been perpetrated on the American people.”

‘Nuf said.

Julia Louis Dreyfus poses naked for the cover of Rolling Stone… with the U.S. Constitution tattooed on her back, replete with the signature of John Hancock. Trouble is, John Hancock didn’t sign the Constitution – he signed the Declaration of Independence.

Democrat congressman debates inflation using Big Mac chart. Only trouble: those aren’t Big Macs.

Charlie Rangel not paying rent on his NYC office – blames Republicans. “As everyone knows,” explained the deadbeat congressman, whose rent for 2013 remains unpaid, “the GOP sequester not only constrained our nation’s economy, but also strained the budget of congressional offices.”

60 Minutes editor dubs sound of gasoline engine over footage of Tesla. Do you ever wonder if the backroom editing personnel of the major news networks are comprised of nothing but marijuana-smoking high school dropouts?

72 big screen TVs go missing after Democratic National Convention. “During a convention it’s not unusual to lose an item or two,” said a representative of LG Electronics, which loaned the Democrats hundreds of televisions for the convention, “but this was a lot.” Rule to live by, LG: lending TVs to Democrats is like lending chickens to a fox.

Bananageddon. A fungus threatens the world’s banana crops, upon which 410 million people rely for a third of their daily calories. That’s the part we find amazing: not that a fungus threatens bananas, but that 410 million people are dependent on those nasty mushy things.

Yellow Sac spider 2 – Mazda 0. The spider that “just likes the smell of gasoline” keeps ruining Mazda gas tanks, causing a second recall in three years. Hey Mazda, they’re spiders: they must be eating something – obviously you have bugs in your fuel system.

Impending formation of a leftwing media conglomerate. When the Obama supporters at Comcast (largest cable company in the U.S. and owners of the NBC/MSNBC propaganda network) merge with the Obama supporters at Time Warner Cable (second largest cable company in the U.S.), one hardcore liberal corporation will control the communications of more than a third of the American populace. (And the other two thirds isn’t much better.)

Venezuela AG formally charges opposition leader Leopoldo Lopez. Looks like the communists in Venezuela need another public image whitewash. Quick, somebody light the Bat Crazy Signal over Gotham City to alert Jimmy Carter.

Obama told service chiefs, “Accept openly gay soldiers or resign.” According to Coast Guard Commandant Adm. Robert Papp, the ultimatum was delivered to them in the Oval Office in 2010. While running for president in 2008, then-Senator Obama said he would never issue such an ultimatum, but hey, that was two years earlier so this is a world record for Obama keeping his word.

Queen gives Pope Francis eggs, whiskey, and beer. Apparently still bitter about the 1982 invasion of the Falklands, the Queen seems to be engaging in a little chemical warfare against the first Argentine Pope. The pontiff’s chambers will be ripe tonight.

MSNBC greenie Bill McKibben wants climate scientists to go on strike. We wholeheartedly support that idea. In fact, they should go on strike for as long as temperatures have not risen which is about sixteen years. See you in 2030, guys!

David Cameron running for re-election pledging to get rid of windmills. Everywhere you look, the green agenda is collapsing under the weight of false promises. When the top politician in the UK calculates there are more votes in attacking green energy than in financing it, you know the rout is on.

Frank Alfisi: April 23, 1940 – January 14, 2014. Obamacare’s first officially documented victim, killed by the bureaucrats on Medicare’s version of a death squad. Rest in peace, Frank. A nation which has lost its way, we apologize.

NBC News posts 1400-word story about female circumcision… without once mentioning Islam.

Obama admits his Syria strategy was no good. Whether or not the president understood that he was making such an admission is debatable, but there’s no other way to interpret what he said. Good thing Congress stopped him from making another blunder.

White House to regulate cow flatulence to battle Global Warming. Finally, a matter on which the Obama administration can legitimately claim expertise: bull shit.

National Science Foundation spent $700,000 on climate change musical. When challenged about the expenditure, White House science czar John Holdren replied with a typical Obama administration non sequitur: “This administration is committed to ensuring that America remains at the epicenter of the global revolution in scientific research and technological innovation.” Huh? It’s a musical, you nimrod!

29 mind-blowing photos of what liberalism did to Detroit. These are the ravages of which evil is capable, what the end of civilization looks like.

Nancy Pelosi calls pro-lifers “dumb.” Which, logically, is a compliment because, according to the Law of Double Negation, when the dumbest woman in the world calls you dumb, it means you’re really smart.

How dysfunctional is the education system? The 9-sentence piece of flotsam pictured above, a “Final Paper” for a course called AFAM 41 at the University of North Carolina, received an A-. Who knows what will happen to this brilliant young man? Someday he might teach Constitutional Law and run for president…

Democrat mayor of Charlotte arrested for corruption. Give Patrick Cannon credit for being a go-getter: only four months in office and he’d already collected a $20,000 bribe and was going back for more when the FBI arrested him.

Harry Reid “acknowledges” stealing $17,000 from his campaign. Prepare for the sound of crickets chirping as the mainstream media covers this story.