Author: J.P. Travis

Official probe concludes Obama administration broke the law. State Dep. employee Maria Otero stonewalled the investigation but officials persevered and discovered that federal funds were used to promote abortion in Kenya. Given past Obama reactions to criminal activity, we expect a quick promotion for Ms. Otero.

Pennsylvania newspaper retracts 150-year-old editorial. Who said newspapers were slow to admit they’re wrong? Whoever it was, they might have a case:

“We write today in reconsideration of “The Gettysburg Address…” Our predecessors, perhaps under the influence of partisanship, or of strong drink, as was common in the profession at the time, called President Lincoln’s words “silly remarks…” In the fullness of time, we have come to a different conclusion.”

Al-Qaeda rebels in Syria mistakenly behead one of their own. He looked like an infidel, doggone it, so they chopped his head off in front of video cameras. Then they realized it was their wounded buddy, Mohammed. Clearly, no IQ test is required for membership in Al-Qaeda.

Global warming scientists discover world’s oldest living creature. Then accidentally kill it trying to determine its age.

Obama used nonexistent fatwa to justify talks with Iran. In September, the serial-misspeaker president said in a speech to the U.N. General Assembly that Ayatollah Ali Khamenei “has issued a fatwa against the development of nuclear weapons.” No, he has not. No such fatwa exists. What’s more, the Ayatollah is on the record saying it would be premature to issue such a ruling.

Architect of Obamacare blames website failure on Fox News. We predict “Ezekiel Emanuel” will someday be listed in dictionaries as a synonym for “smug bastard.”

The New York Times invents a brand spankin’ new phrase… to help them through the balance of Obama’s term in office. “Incorrect promise” is what they call an Obama lie now.

Add WebMD to the list of media we hate. The consumer health care website people trust with medical questions has been writing positive articles about Obamacare… without telling people they were being paid by the government to promote Obamacare.

Unofficial Obamacare navigator has solution for higher insurance premiums. Solution: find a sugar daddy.

The Sugar Daddy Insurance Plan
Most Americans believe the only options for getting healthcare and avoiding “Obama-drama” are through your employer or your parents. Well, they thought wrong! If you’re a young and beautiful woman (or man), SeekingArrangement.com has got you covered.

Plaque on building at Northeastern Illinois University in Chicago. The plaque, which the university refuses to change, was installed in 1905 so that’s how long the Democrat Party has been trying to revise history to hide their ignoble past.

“Muslims can take the property of Christians and Jews.” So says imam Yasir Qadhi, professor in the Religious Studies Department of Rhodes College, in Memphis, Tennessee. (What? You thought this came from some foreign whackjob in Egypt or Saudi Arabia?)

Guess who took the food stamp money. No, it wasn’t Republicans who caused the cuts to food stamps. Obama diverted $4.5 billion from the program to fund Michelle’s bean-sprout-heavy Let’s Move! school lunch program… which kids refuse to eat.

Three guys build alternative Healthcare.gov over the weekend. For free. And it works. So what did taxpayers get for that $630 million we spent on the official government version? Other than lots of campaign donations to Obama?

White guy wins Houston election by pretending he’s black. Thereby garnering the black racist votes.

Windmills killed at least 600,000 bats last year. When you add the bats killed to the birds killed, factor in the screeching and howling noises that drive people crazy, consider the fact that many have stopped working from lack of maintenance, all of them stop working when the wind blows too hard or too soft, and even when they work they produce electricity so expensive utilities must be forced by legislative fiat to buy it… well, by golly, windmills are the perfect liberal idea.

Brother of Barack Obama might qualify as enemy combatant. So that would make two of them in the family.

Another video lie from network television news. This time it’s ABC with an animation showing the LAX shooter holding an M16 with attached M203 grenade launcher. In real life, Paul Ciancia used a Smith & Wesson M&P15 sporting rifle… not nearly scary-looking enough for gun-control preachers.

Antarctic sea ice hits 35-year record high. One climate scientist can’t understand how this is possible. “Why would sea ice be increasing?” asks Jinlun Zhang of the University of Washington… then goes on to insist that “the overwhelming evidence is that the Southern Ocean is warming.”

Anti-Tea Party protesters scared of Billy Graham. According to one protester, some activists are staying away from the evangelist’s 95th birthday party because they’re “scared of being struck down by lightning.” He does look a little bit like Charlton Heston.

Marvel Comics announces new Muslim superheroine. Hopefully she won’t be asked to use her superpowers in Saudi Arabia because she isn’t wearing a burqa. And they don’t let women drive cars.

How many current health insurance plans are “substandard” under Obamacare? Answer: 98%. Even people with plans heretofore considered “Cadillac” plans are getting cancellation notices.

Obama administration rules that Obamacare is NOT a “federal health care program.” Oh goody, more fodder for late-night talk show comedians.

Eric Holder STILL threatening George Zimmerman. When you put a suit on a thug, all you end up with is a thug in a suit.

Hallmark forced to apologize for miniature sweater Christmas ornament. They changed the word “gay” to “fun” and gay people were offended even though the word gay in “Deck the Halls” originally meant fun and therefore didn’t refer to gay people at all. Got that? So anyway, Hallmark apologized. For something. (We’re as confused as you are.)

White House attacks Stage IV cancer patient. When an unfortunate woman in California had the audacity to complain about Obamacare causing the cancellation of her health insurance, Dan Pfeiffer, senior advisor to President Obama, decided calling her a liar was an appropriate and constructive response. For decades the left has been promising a classless society – now we know what they meant.