Fla Man arrested for… releasing helium balloon with his girlfriend. “Anthony Brasfield saw romance when he released a dozen heart-shaped balloons into the sky over Dania Beach with his sweetie. Also watching the romantic gesture: an FHP trooper, who instead noted probable cause for an environmental crime.” Can we get much more stupid? YES WE CAN!

DOJ admits Aaron Swartz prosecution was political. Another unicorn vanishes: “This is making me angrier than almost anything I’ve heard since Aaron died. I finally figured out why: Because I worked my ass off to elect the Obama administration in 2008. I helped these people get in power. And then they drove the man I loved to suicide because they didn’t like something he said once.”

Illegal immigrants set free from detention centers as sequester approaches. The most cynical move yet in Prince Obama’s “don’t blame me for my idea” sequester kabuki dance. “The move is proving controversial. Immigrant-rights groups say it shows the administration was detaining folks it never should have gone after in the first place, while Republicans questioned the decision-making.”

FARRAKHAN ENDORSES HAGEL. First Iran and now Farrakhan endorses him. Do we REALLY want this anti-semite, Muslim butt-kisser for Secretary of Defense? Why are many of the Republicans hiding behind mommy’s skirt?

Oops, Obama’s Organizing For Action forgot to register domain name. So an enterprising fellow named Derek Bovard registered OrganizingForAction.net and set it up to redirect people to the National Rifle Association.

Kanye West: “I hate business people . . . Since when was making art about getting rich?” Mr. West might be relieved to know that often times there is no correlation between making art and making money. Which is precisely why he is a millionaire.

John Kerry to Germans: Americans have “right to be stupid.” It’s nice to have a Secretary of State who backs his words with personal example.

OFA selling WH access to donors? “The New York Times reported over the weekend that donors who contribute and raise $500,000 for President Obama’s Organizing for Action will get special access to the President. That’s right. They’re selling access to the President.” “This just looks bad,” says MSNBC’s Chuck Todd. Or as Captain Renault might say, “I’m shocked, shocked to learn that prostitutes perform sex acts for money…”

Brooklyn Democrat hosts party wearing blackface. “I was just, I think, I was trying to emulate, you know, maybe some of these basketball players,” said Dov Hikind afterward, trying to defend himself. “There is not a prejudiced bone in my body.”

FujiFilm has new material that generates electricity from the human body. Once they start making clothing out of this stuff, everybody will be a walking power plant. And since bigger people will presumbably generate more power, Michael Moore and Al Gore will finally be worthwhile human beings.

“Loud Groans” heard in Academy Awards media room when Michelle Obama announced as surprise presenter. “When Michelle Obama was introduced by Jack Nicholson most of the reporters in the media room groaned….loudly.” Overexposed? Wait ’till she turns up as a Redskins cheerleader, a visiting DC detective on “CSI” and first violin on “Live from the Met”. What about “pinch hitting for Albert Pujols”? Would you believe she wrote this post?

Obama: ‘We’ve got to do some governing’ Bend over makers. King Barry needs more of your money.

John Kerry invents country of Kyrzakhstan. “John Kerry has suffered his first gaffe as the new US secretary of state, inventing the nation of ‘Kyrzakhstan’.” New SoS Herman Munster is just trying his hand at some nation building. Wonder how ‘Kyrzakhstan’ feels about climate change? We’re sure they’re for it.

Biden: Americans ‘No Longer Worried’ About Economy. Stupid, just like the economy, is something these guys just can’t fix.

Bob Menendez plays race card, blames conservatives for scandals. “Democratic Senator Bob Menendez blamed conservatives for his ethics scandals, framing them as a racial attack on him because of his Hispanic heritage.” To tell the truth, he could pass for one of the media’s “white hispanics”, a term the MSM coined to abet their demonization of George Zimmerman. Or maybe he just said he was a minority because he wanted to make friends, as did Fauxchahontas Warren.

MSNBC almost “A bona fide organ of state propaganda”. “The cable channel that flies under the banner of NBC News is now all but a bona fide organ of state propaganda, an information channel that speaks in the same dominant voice as the folks running the government–and tries to mask what it is up to.” The word “almost” was never used so hilariously.

Michelle Obama surprises Oscars by presenting Best Picture award: The real surprise will come when the tax payers get the bill for making yet another one of Michelle Antoinette’s fantasies come true.

Affleck Grants Wish of Ex-Ambassador, Thanks Canada in Acceptance Speech, But didn’t thank the Americans, and the CIA and State Dept. in particular. We’re just surprised he didn’t thank Jimmy Carter.

Stalker teacher harassed, assaulted, and threatened another teacher… but the teachers’ union said the Department of Education could not fire him. Remember, though, it’s not unions waging the war on women – it’s Republicans.

UPDATE: FIFTY-NINE Gun Companies Now Boycotting New York. We hope that soon all gun and ammo companies are boycotting. NY and any other city, county or state that tries to pull this.

Liberal astroturf group offering $9 to $11 per hour to join its gun-control campaign. This is what the libtards do when they can’t get enough support. Too bad gas bags like Karl Rove don’t use their PAC money to spread what they do all over the USA.

CHER CALLS GOP STAR TED CRUZ A ‘BIGOT,’ ‘CREATURE FROM THE NETHER REGIONS.’ We think she’s just mad because no one wants to check out her “neither regions” anymore.

Yes! We Should Defund The U.N.’s Intergovernmental Panel On Climate Change. We suggest they take it one step further and defund the whole UN insane asylum.

Pro-American vs. anti-American at the box office. Two movies with the same production team, same director, and same screenwriter. One movie has a positive view of American efforts in the War on Terror, the other makes U.S. soldiers look crazy and irresponsible. Guess which one did seven times better at the box office?

Florida doesn’t have enough doctors for Medicaid expansion says Fla Med Assoc. Interesting is that this “news” paper alludes to the FMA as a “lobby group” in its headline. What are the odds if pro-ObamaCare advocates announced “New health bill is AWESOME!” the group saying same would be labelled with an appellation sure to cast doubt on the legitimacy of the conclusion? Maybe they more likely be called something neutral like “consumer group”? Just askin’.