I HATE THE MEDIA ™

Biden: Gabby Giffords ‘Was Shot and Mortally Wounded’: Rumors of Gabby Giffords’ demise have been greatly exaggerated. As have been the rumors that Biden has a functioning brain.

Smoke signal say, “White man pissing away heap big money.” The free government cell phone program gets worse and worse. Turns out that cell phone companies get paid $9.25 per month for most of the phones, but they get $25 per month for cell phones provided to Native Americans living on tribal lands. Honest freakin’ Injun.

Poll: Even Democrats skeptical Obamacare will improve health care quality, reduce costs. “…37% of Democrats said ‘the cost of health care for the nation as a whole’ would be better as a result of the law, just 39% said health care quality would be better and 27% said consumer protections for private insurance would be better.” So we’re doing this why then? To make Obama look good? Well then it’s all worth it, right?

Obama urges Israelis to compromise for peace: So what is to be the compromise in a situation where the people of Israel don’t want another holocaust and the Arab interlopers do?

Rangel: “We’re talking about millions of kids dying, being shot by assault weapons”. Reminds us of the old Dylan song: “Idiot wind, blowing like a circle around my skull, From the Grand Coulee Dam to the Capitol. Idiot wind, blowing every time you move your teeth, You’re an idiot, babe. It’s a wonder that you still know how to breathe.”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=1eqyDyMb7Kk#!

Governor Cuomo forced to ease gun legislation he just passed. For one thing, he discovered there’s no such thing as a seven-bullet clip. Oops. When it comes to Democrats passing legislation in a hurry during the middle of the night, Obamacare was The Hangover and New York’s anti-gun legislation is The Hangover Part II.

Obama compares Israeli-Palestinian conflict to arguments between US and Canada. Yes Mr. Genius President, those Canadian rockets fired from Toronto at Buffalo day in and day out are just horrid.

Massachusetts principal calls off Honors Night because it could be ‘devastating’ to students who missed mark. Speaking of stupid teachers. We wonder if Fabrizio was a loser in school and now he’s getting his revenge of the turds?

PETA killed more than 1,600 cats and dogs at its Virginia headquarters last year – almost 90% of the animals handed over to the charity’s American shelter. Evidently PETA now stands for People Euthanizing Terrified Animals. Typical libtard hypocrites.

Minn proposal could hike Alcohol Tax 300%. Tax on spirits would go from $5.03 per gallon to $17.82, wine $.95 per gallon to $8.24, beer from $2.40 per 31-gallon barrel to $13.97. Besides businesses closing, people crossing state borders in droves to buy booze and/or an upsurge in folks making their own, what could go wrong?

Do you want to know what propaganda looks like? The WaPo published this picture, purportedly of a power plant emitting black smoke. It’s really white smoke, condensing water vapor, photographed at a time of day when the setting sun makes it look ominous: “That power plant has state-of-the-art ‘scrubbers,’ which which cost over $400 million, and which remove 95% of the SO2 and nearly all of the particulate matter. Almost nothing visible is left except steam.”

Death Wish Coffee: the world’s strongest java. “Double the strength of an espresso, Death Wish Coffee even comes with a disclaimer warning drinkers to expect ‘many sleepless nights’.” Keep some on hand for Obama’s next prime time speech – on second thought, make ours a decaf.

Jerusalem Post editor: “We can’t figure out what he’s doing here”. “Caroline Glick, Senior Contributing Editor of the Jerusalem Post said the Israeli people consider President Obama ‘a hostile president overall…'” We know the feeling. We can’t figure out what he’s doing here, either.

Bolshoi Ballet has been turned into a giant brothel. That’s what a former soloist claims. She says female dancers are forced to sleep with wealthy patrons or lose their spots. In other words, the Bolshoi is Russia’s version of Hollywood.

Dickheads studying duck dicks. We’re flat broke. Tapped out. But “The National Science Foundation (NSF) has awarded a $384,949 grant to Yale University for a study on “Sexual Conflict, Social Behavior and the Evolution of Waterfowl Genitalia…” Let us save you some money. Duck dicks are small. That’s why you’ve never heard anyone say, “That guy’s hung like a duck.” (By the way, if you want to see some really crazy stuff, do a Google image search for “duck” and “penis”. WTF?)

Barack Obama gets his March Madness picks in on time. “His White House closes tours while he continues to play golf and host lavish parties. He’ll be two months late with his budget, but he got his NCAA basketball brackets in right on time before heading to the Middle East.” Well, to be candid, we’d likely be better off if a basketball coach were making foreign policy. Why not just swap?

Menendez donor Melgen courted President Obama, Harry Reid. Since there about as many selfless politicians as there are snakes with hiking boots, it’s likely there will always be influence peddling. The solution would seem to be to give them less influence to peddle, but we’ve been going the opposite way.

Yesterday’s AP story about Rand Paul endorsing amnesty for illegal aliens? Totally untrue. AP writer Erica Werner wrote that Senator Paul wants illegals to gain citizenship but he didn’t even use the word “citizenship” in his whole speech.

It is March of 2013 and Paul Krugman is going on about the Iraq War again: Remembering the anniversary of the start of the Iraq War is all fine and dandy -even if for some reason you can’t remember Libya or a President that has done more to destroy civil liberties than any American since FDR. But it is another war we are more concerned with. And that is Mr. Krugman’s war against the middle class. That is his war on the value of our labor. That is his war on the value of our savings. That is his war on any measures allowing us to maintain a greater say-so over our welfare than the planner baron’s have. And this is no accident. A strong middle class means no need for a tubby little statist that can seem to remember everything about history except for the part where his economic totalitarianism failed every time it was tried.

ICE ADMITS 200+ SERIOUS CRIMINAL ILLEGALS RELEASED. THIS is nothing more than Obama having a temper-tantrum and making certain everyone pays.

Harry Reid uses death of Marines to politicize sequestration, Marines respond. Regardless if the Democrats abuse dead Marines over sequestration or dead children over gun control, it just shows what scum many of them can be to further their agendas. It sounds to us like the USMC response is being overly polite. We suggest they put Clint Eastwood back into his Gunny Sargent attire from Heartbreak Ridge and let him respond. We suspicion he’d refer to Reid as a “clusterf***.

TSA Humiliates Injured Marine. Looks like the Totally Stupid A-Holes are again taking extraordinary steps to ensure safety. They should perhaps rename it the MRM. Morons Rejected by McDonald’s.

McCain and Graham on Syria: Obama’s “red line” has been crossed, so it’s time to take action. We say if these two wheelchair warriors want to start another war no one will ever win, that them, their spouses, children, grand children, brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles and cousins be the first to volunteer to be cannon fodder.

Not even 40 votes in the Senate for the assault-weapons ban, says Reid. “Assume that all 45 Republicans in the Senate are voting no on the AWB; that means, per Reid’s number, that there are at least 16(!) Democrats prepared to vote no as well.” Savor the richly deserved defeat of Feinstein’s “assault weapon” ban. May there be many more such richly deserved defeats.

Cyprus lawmakers reject bank tax; bailout in disarray. “The rejection, with 36 votes against, 19 abstentions and one absence, brought the east Mediterranean island, one of the smallest European states, to the brink of financial meltdown.” Eurocrats desperately search for new plan to keep Cyrpus in the EU Roach Motel.