I HATE THE MEDIA ™

Obama calls his wife “Michael”. This may explain many, many things…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8cgk732vfGQ&feature=player_embedded

Finally, a real smart car! Unfortunately the term has already been hijacked for a clown car being marketed to overly smug individuals suffering from a disturbing lack of ability in the arena of critical thinking.

Hairy, crazy ants invade from Texas to Miss. Hmm, an invasion force destroying the local economy and placing the citizens in physical danger. Sounds like a group that would benefit immensely from the passage of the DREAM Act.

Van Jones hates old people and wants them to starve to death! Alright so that might be a bit of hyperbole, but it is hardly more ridiculous than the rhetoric the left routinely engages in. And, unlike us, they’re most decidedly not engaging in what they believe to be satire. All the same it is important to note that with Jones’ support for the classless warriors raging against Wall Street (but not the government control that defines Wall Street) he is strongly standing against those that depend on the institution to be for them what Social Security could only promise to be. And in the end Wall Street isn’t so far removed from Main Street so long as Wall Street remains the place where Main Street’s retirement lives.

Obamas celebrate wedding anniversary with lavish dinner at stylish $150-a-head restaurant. To be fair $150.00 doesn’t go nearly as far as it did before Bernanke and Obama gutted the value of our dollar.

Scare: Suspicious white powder sent to residence of Biden’s brother. No word yet if Biden’s daughter was supposed to be staying over that weekend.

Fellow walks away from mortgage; a year later, is hit with a judgement for $192,000. Forty-one states allow lenders to sue for mortgage debt if a home fetches less than the mortgage in a foreclosure sale. They’re called “deficiency lawsuits” and they’re giving rise to a new industry, companies that buy banks’ soured mortgages and sue the borrowers for the remaining debt. Lawsuits, the Democrats’ favorite type of entepreneurship!

Roseanne Barr wants to behead rich people if they won’t give up their wealth. “I first would allow the guilty bankers to pay back anything over $100 million (in) personal wealth, because I believe in the maximum wealth of $100 million. If they’re unable to live on that amount, they should go to re-education camps. And if that doesn’t work, they should be beheaded.” Since Rosanne suggests the $100 million cut-off mark (you’ll pardon the expression), is it safe to assume that she has only $99 million or so.

CDC issues another bogus disease alert. To summarize the CDC’s comments on the dreaded HEV68 virus: This variation of the common cold has killed just three people in three years (two of them in a third world country) and that fact that more cases are showing up can probably be attributed to the fact that better diagnostic tools are now available. Nevertheless, expect frantic demands for more reseach money in 3 … 2 … 1 …

Recent flooding spawns new wave of aggressive mosquitoes in Vermont. Not to worry. Vermonters have a fool proof method of getting rid of bloodsuckers; they send them to Washington. And yes Bernie Sanders, we’re talking about you.

Muslim mother stabbed daughter 40 times and cut out her liver in ritual killing to ‘exorcise evil spirits.’ “A Muslim woman disemboweled her daughter as a sacrifice to God after she became convinced the four-year-old was possessed by spirits, the Old Bailey heard. Shayma Ali, 36, stabbed the girl up to 40 times and took out her liver while Koranic verses played in the background.” Gotta love that religion of peace!

Wall St. protestors shut down Brooklyn Bridge. One irate driver, a Ground Zero construction worker, blasted the pedestrians. “I work my ass off all day, and these g**damned hippies close down the Brooklyn Bridge so I can’t get home?” he said. “This ain’t right!” Embattled Congressman Charlie Rangel tried to lend his support was chased away by a heckler. Sometimes the news is fun.

The hardship of not having your mum around to make your bed and bring you cookies and milk.

Company will load loved ones’ ashes into ammunition. You had to see this one coming… now you can have a “Shotgun Funeral”. Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust, I hope they left me the shotgun when they drew up their trust.

Al Sharpton and the free $500 stimulus checks. All you have to do is give Al’s National Action Network your name, address, birth date, and social security number. Identity theft? Don’t be paranoid!

White House sends Hill Fast & Furious docs, but withholds some. “These internal NSS emails are not included in the enclosed documents because the [Executive Office of the President] has significant confidentiality interests in its internal communications.” Significant in that they might tend to incriminate someone?

Rep. Darrell Issa (R-Calif.) said in a letter to the Ford Motor Company on Thursday that he was “deeply concerned about undue political pressure exerted by the White House.” to pull their “no bail-out” commercial: Ford claims there was no such pressure and that television ads were discontinued in accordance with a pre-existing schedule. True or not these commercials have created more buzz and good will than any advertisement we can ever remember (with the possible exception of those GoDaddy ads with the half-naked girls traipsing around). And in any event, given the immense popularity of this commercial, Ford must ask itself a very important question: Do they want to sell cars, or do they want to sell Obama?

Barack Obama wants jobs bill back. What a coincidence, Americans want their jobs back. The only problem is . . . these two goals are mutually exclusive. For one to succeed the other has to fail.

GAO: 42% of USHCN Weather Stations Fail to Meet NOAA Standards. Not surprising when for years photos have been surfacing on the internet showing weather stations in goofy places such as at the end of airport runways, next to air conditioner exhausts, adjacent to or on concrete or blacktop pavement. All places that conveniently add warming to the actual temperature.

Thar’s oil in them thar hills: …by 2017, investment bank Goldman Sachs predicts the US could be poised to pass Saudi Arabia and overtake Russia as the world’s largest oil producer. While President Softee and the no-Keystone cops are flushing our money down a Solyndrical tube, North Dakota oil producers are getting rich and reducing our energy imports. The center of gravity in global energy is shifting, no thanks to you-know-who.

We’ve obviously displeased Obama in some way because he hasn’t delivered all the hope and change he promised us. How can we get Obama to like us again? “Stop worrying about math so much. People are always wondering why the budget doesn’t add up and why we’re spending more than we take in, and Obama obviously really doesn’t like us focusing on that.” Making Obama like us is really not worth the trouble.

NEIN, NEIN, NEIN, and the death of EU Fiscal Union. “If this means the euro will shed some members or blow apart – as it almost certainly does – then the rest of the world must prepare for the day.” Germany has drawn a line in the sand, and refuses to keep throwing good money after bad. German national guilt over World War II may have finally reached its limit.

Harvard-educated historian says Obama “grammatically challenged.” Seen on our milk carton this morning: “Missing – evidence of Obama’s superior intellect, since AT LEAST 2008.” And in other news, Janeane Garofalo says grammar is for raaaaacists.

Obama’s former campaign funders on Wall Street turn against him. Romney raised $4.9 million before June 30 of this year, nearly twice what Obama gathered. Huh? You mean those evil rich guys aren’t funding your campaign? Too bad most of your supporters don’t pay taxes, they could have checked that $3 for the Presidential campaign box…

“If somebody gives a gun to somebody knowing they’re going to commit murder guess what we call them?” It seems everyone knows this but the perpetrators themsleves, or at least they’re in denial.

http://youtu.be/IC2C2lIwNSA

State Gets $5 Mil Bonus For Food Stamp Sign Up. Speaking of abusing the welfare system, looks like Oregon may be  blowing California out of the water. The Obama administration appears to be stacking the voter deck at the taxpayers expense.