Bonfire of the Absurdities

Complete Fiasco. “Putin’s winning without even having to invade.” At this rate, by the time January 2017 rolls around, Putin will be not even having to invade Ohio.

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86M full-time private-sector workers sustain 148M benefit takers. The corollary, as tweeted today: “Taxes are the price we pay for 7 of the 10 richest counties being within commuting distance of DC.” Buying votes with OPM.

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Bloomberg: “I have earned my place in heaven. It’s not even close.” “Pointing to his work on gun safety, obesity and smoking cessation, he said with a grin: “I am telling you if there is a God, when I get to heaven I’m not stopping to be interviewed. I am heading straight in.” Ummm, not too self-righteous, is he?

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Harry Reid on Bundy range war: “It’s not over.” “We can’t have an American people that violate the law and then just walk away from it.” Yeah, that’s just for politicians and journOlists.

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Officials: Russian fighter jet buzzed U.S. ship. “…in a 90-minute encounter, the Russian SU-24 fighter jet made a dozen low passes … near the USS Donald Cook.” Just Putin’s way of telling Stinkburger “I fart in your general direction.”

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George Will: “Liberalism has a kind of Tourette’s Syndrome these days.” “It’s become a joke among young people. You go to a campus where this kind of political correctness reigns and some young person will say looks like it’s going to rain. The person looks and says, ‘you’re a racist’.” That statement’s undoubtedly racist according to the current Democrat-Media complex style guide.

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State Department to spend $400,000 for camel statue in Pakistan. “Public art which will be presented in the new embassy should reflect the values of a predominantly Islamist country.” A big statue of a horse’s ass will reflect the values of this one.

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Record-High 60% of Californians say they pay too much tax. Hmmm, and the Kleptocrats usually win 60% of the vote in California. Coincidence, we’re sure.

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Standoff at Bundy Ranch ends, with photo of the year so far. “The new head of the BLM, Neil Kornze, worked for Harry Reid as a policy adviser from 2003 to 2011.” That probably explains everything.

blm police dog

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US warns Russia of “additional consequences” over Ukraine. Doing the same thing over and over and over and over again and expecting a different result.

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Science communicator: “I’d like nothing better than if thousands of middle-class white people died in an extreme weather event.” “…Joe Q. Flyover doesn’t understand science. He wants evidence.” Apparently a satire but it sounds so much like something a Gore or Kerry would say, it reveals the depths that contemporary “climate science” has plumbed.

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Divorce Beltway Style. “The Democratic breakup that exposes Washington’s rotten core.” “Law making” today is about politicians throwing obstacles in everyone’s path and then charging money to navigate rent-seekers around them. When the Democrooks rail about “money in politics”, they’re railing about themselves. “The Podestas are the One Percent.”

podestas

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Individuals targeted as San Francisco tech money protests intensify. No Republicans in Frisco so the Lefties declare war on each other. Q: Why is constant use of class warfare rhetoric for political gain like pissing in the wind? A: Who cares, protestors are burning down my million-dollar condo! More here.

protest

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NATO: Satellite photos show Russia mobilizing on Ukraine border. Is Putin showing more weakness or is he just trying to protect the Ukraine desert tortoises?

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One-Trick Pony. “All 134 times Harry Reid has mentioned the Koch Brothers on the Senate Floor.” Not a pony, just the rear half of one.

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Rep. Frank Wolf to withhold funds from lawless Eric Holder. “When our FY 2015 bill is marked up this spring, I intend to withhold $1 million for every overdue report from the FY 2013 and FY 2014 bills.” Expect the Dept of “Justice” to hold an assault weapon fire sale (excuse our double entendre) in Mexico soon.

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UK Minister: Fight Climate Change by reducing “smelly emissions” from baked beans. Pardon us, old chap, but most of those “smelly emissions” emanate from politicians and other fools with a preponderance of feces in their crania.

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The Red Line and the Rat Line. “Bombshells expose Obama’s fraud in Syria and Benghazi.” Why isn’t this a major story plastered over front pages and being read phonetically by TV talking heads all over the sh*t-stream media? Simple, a Republican isn’t president.

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Emails show Democrat on Oversight Committee was working with Lois Lerner to target True the Vote. “That [Rep. Elijah] Cummings (D-MD) and the IRS sought nearly identical information raises the strong probability of collusion between the government agency and the Democrats on the House Government Oversight and Reform Committee.” Not a smidgen of corruption so finding evidence of any is raaaaaacist.

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Hank Aaron compares Republicans that oppose Obama to KKK. Yeah, and if Obama was a baseball player, it’d be racist to strike him out. So there.

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Eric Holder plays race card. “You look at the way the Attorney General of the United States was treated yesterday by a House Committee. … What Attorney General has ever had to deal with that kind of treatment?” Let’s turn that question around: what other AG has peed on Congress as much as you?

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IRS under fire: Vote for Obama stickers, campaign cheerleading commonplace. “…it was ‘commonplace’ in a Dallas IRS office for employees to have pro-Obama screensavers on their computers, and to have campaign-style buttons and stickers at their office.” Not a smidgen of corruption… Hey, a glob the size of Jupiter ain’t no smidgen.

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North Korean official reportedly executed by flamethrower. Progressive!

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Holder to Louie Gohmert over contempt charge: “You don’t want to go there, buddy!” Holder holds you guys in contempt, no reason you shouldn’t return the favor.

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The spread of “debate is over” syndrome. “On climate and other issues, many in academia, media, government insist their viewpoint is unassailable and won’t tolerate dissent.” Nobody expects the American inquisition… our chief weapons are “SHUT UP”, “YOU’RE FIRED” and “RAAAAAACISM”…

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