CARREY: ‘FUX NEWS’ A ‘MEDIA COLOSTOMY BAG.’ Poor Carrey. Based on this comment he couldn’t win on a show titled: Are You Funnier Than a Third-Grader?

History lesson about the racist past of the Democrat Party. “Make the Democrats own their history. They don’t like it very much, and who can blame them?”

Video: Planned Parenthood Official Argues for Right to Post-Birth Abortion: Planned Parenthood was started with the belief in the right of the few super-humans to sterilize and slaughter the many “sub-humans” that stood in the way of the society they wanted to build. The goals of the progressives have not changed over the decades. But it is utterly chilling that they are starting to openly express them again.

Turin Shroud “is not a medieval forgery”. “The Turin Shroud is not a medieval forgery, as has long been claimed, but could in fact date from the time of Christ’s death, a new book claims.” Centuries-old mystery continues to be mysterious.

NPR laments “confusion” campaign to teach two sides on climate change. Yeah, ’cause that’s how science is s’posed to work: once the politicians, journ0lists and celebrities vote on the truth, it’s settled and everybody shut up.

Egyptian Cleric: U.S. aid to Egypt constitutes Jizya Tax. “Jizya tax is the extra tax imposed on non-Muslims who live under Muslim rule according to the Qur’an and hadith.” How about we sequester this money, bozos?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=mubO2BavNOM#!

EPA to unveil plan to clean up tailpipe pollution that critics say would raise gas prices. Now the rest of the country can be like California. You will soon have to assume the position when you fill up your car.

Study finds Community Reinvestment Act did, in fact, lead to the financial crisis. Most IHTM readers already know this, but it’s good to review the facts because liberals love to buy votes by handing out mortgages with our money… and Obama is pushing the same policies now that brought us to ruination before.

Obamacare gets Juicy: Obama hipsters learn health care law comes at a heavy cost. Hip, trendy, high-end NYC retailer Juicy Couture downsizes 128 FT employees to 19 as result of Obamacare costs. Hip, trendy young Obama voters discover: 1. The law of unintended consequences 2. Elections do matter 3. There’s no free lunch. Juicy!

And the least free state in America, is… New Yawk, of course, with California hot on its heels. The bottom 5 are all blue states while 4 out of the top 5 freest states are red. Check out the interactive map to see where your state falls.

State auditor: California’s net worth at negative $127.2 billion. Yet Jerry ‘Moonbeam’ Brown and his Sacramento Clown Circus still think we need to be blowing yet more billions upon billions on the Bullet Gravy Train to Nowhere.

THE NO. 1 THREAT TO TEXAS — AND IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH POLITICS OR ECONOMICS. Nope, it’s not all those ex’s running around and isn’t Ross Perot either.

Parody Video Makes Fun of Jim Carrey’s Anti-Gun Song. Gotta love it when someone strikes back at a Hollywood hypocrite.

California’s jobless claims rise by 3,000. Looks like Jerry Brown’s tax plan is starting to work it’s “magic.”

Cypriots show patience and pragmatism as banks reopen. Looks like the banksters experiment worked out just fine. They ripped off 40% of everyone who has deposits in excess of $100,000 Euros and all the sheeple have done is bend forward and take it. Watch for this coming to the country you live in soon.

 

Company releases new bacon-flavored condoms. Well, someone had to say it. This gives whole new meaning to the term ‘getting porked.’

Massive oil spill in Minnesota as freight train carrying haul from Canada derailed and spilled 30,000 GALLONS of crude. So tell us again envirotards: Why you don’t want the Keystone XL pipeline? It’s obviously much safer than rail.

Two Redfords in one. “Actor-director Robert Redford used his opening address at the Sundance film festival last night to add to the pressure on Hollywood to rein in its depiction of gun violence in the wake of the Newtown school massacre.” “Redford’s next film, due out in American theaters early next month, is a homage to Bill Ayers and the Weather Underground.” Well, like another Hollywood brain might say, it’s violence but it’s not violence-violence.

The UK horsemeat scandal goes from bad to worse. DNA testing of the meat in an Indian restaurant’s lamb curry found no trace of lamb and furthermore “concluded that the meat chunks were not beef, chicken, pork, goat, horse or even human flesh.” Hmm… anybody seen Walt Disney’s 101 Dalmatians lately?

Squatters, looters overrun Sandy-Ravaged Staten Island. In other news, imperious, self-righteous mayor ignores problems he was elected to manage in order to devote his time to stuff that’s none of his effing business.

Janet Napolitano: Immigrants Will Change Arizona From Red To Blue. Interesting that we have a treasonous pendeja running DHS. Can you spell voter fraud? (Meanwhile the ball-less Republicans do absolutely nothing).

IDENTIFYING TARGETS? NEWSPAPER PUBLISHES INTERACTIVE MAP SHOWING ALL PUBLIC SCHOOLS WITH NO SECURITY OFFICERS. This smells to us like they’re just begging for another nutcase to massacre more kids to further their anti-gun agenda. We pray no one uses this to do evil, but if they do, we hope the people who run this paper and Gannet are prosecuted as accessories to murder. This is tantamount to yelling fire in a crowded public place.

The worst TV promo ever: “Only we have the exclusive video of Jesus being whipped.” Mrs Editor is watching Entertainment Tonight and I just heard the blonde bimbette deliver the worst — the absolute worst — promo ever. “Coming up next: Only we have the exclusive video of Jesus being whipped.” Seriously. I think the line was delivered by the hostette below, but they all look alike, so who knows?

Medicare Has Stopped Paying For Diagnostic Tests. Death panels? We don’t need no stinkin’ death panels. We’ll just let everyone die! (Unless your last name is Garcia, Torres, Gonzalez….) We think we’ll start buying stock in coffin manufacturers, crematoriums and cemeteries.

 

MRCOLIONNOIR Responds to Jim Carrey’s Cry for Attention: This Mr. Noir person is great. And we really can’t add much to what he has said here. So instead we’ll just beg Mr. Carrey to go against the grain a little and make a movie that doesn’t suck. That way our boycott won’t feel so much like a cheat.