Author: A. Smithee

Saying Merry Christmas is worse than fornicating, drinking alcohol, or killing someone.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFW3ZNC8sjw&feature=player_embedded

Obama Admin Skews Deportation Figures. “The Obama Administration drastically inflated statistics to show that it has deported a record-high number of illegal immigrants with criminal records, according to federal data obtained by a nonprofit university group dedicated to researching the government. The new documents reveal the figure is actually at an all-time low and rapidly decreasing, leaving the Obama Administration with egg on its face just weeks after bragging about removing an unprecedented number of criminal aliens.” C’mon you haters! They were only off by 40% or so…

CA Gov. Jerry Brown announces new cuts to state spending. “Governor announces automatic cuts due to tax revenue shortfall – to the tune of $1B. Students, the developmentally disabled and libraries among those affected.” No scare tactics here! Good thing he’s not going after the salaries of all those politicians! Or a freeze on raises for government employees. Whew!

Physicists close in on elusive subatomic “GOD” particle. Instead, Scientists should focus on isolating the grain of logic in any liberal argument.

HAMAS-linked CAIR leader calls for boycott of Lowe’s for pulling their ads off TLC’s ‘All-American Muslim’. CA State Senator Ted Lieu is threatening legislation against Lowe’s if they don’t apologize and start running their ads on the ‘All-American (sic) Muslim’ show again. Suddenly, I feel the need to buy all my CHRISTmas gifts at LOWES!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7gmPiPU7Lo&feature=player_embedded

Newt’s Iowa AD —
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=brdrjLavTzU

EGYPT: Newly elected radical Islamic leader issues fatwa against women wearing high heels. “The recent emergence of the hardline Salafi trend in Egypt after the January 25 revolution has given way to a series of controversial fatwas that mainly focused on women, Copts, culture and democracy.” Just when you thought there couldn’t possibly be any more fatwas against women’s rights… this must be the vision Obama had for the new Arab democracies! Gee Wally, looks like we’ve traveled back to the middle ages!

Obama rolls out new 2012 theme. President Barack Obama’s Kansas speech will show “his vision of an America where everyone engages in fair play, does their fair share and gets a fair shot.” It’ll be “fair” alright – except for those rich bastards… oh, and those who don’t agree with us or vote for us… and don’t forget those evil non-union people… and those gun owners… add in those crazy people who believe in God…

Black Friday Best-Seller: Guns “Numbers from the Federal Bureau of Investigation show an all-time one-day high for background check requests from gun buyers last Friday.” All I want for Christmas is my 2 barrel 12 gauge! Best way to arm people, turn them into conservatives, and get people back to God is to let the left march in their little parades and camp out in our parks.

Saudis fear there will be ‘no more virgins’ and people will turn gay if female drive ban is lifted. “Repealing a ban on women drivers in Saudi Arabia would result in ‘no more virgins’, the country’s religious council has warned. A ‘scientific’ report … warns that allowing women to drive would ‘provoke a surge in prostitution, pornography, homosexuality and divorce’.” These same scientists have also proven muslim women on rollerskates cause perfectly rational followers of islam to wear explosive vests.

A $230,000 Taxpayer-Funded ‘Green Jobs’ Website, but No Jobs Listed. “The Department of Energy has awarded a $230,000 contract to the Association of Energy Services Professionals to develop a website on energy efficiency jobs — but the agency has prohibited the listing of actual position openings.” Even The New York Times wrote, ”federal and state efforts to stimulate creation of green jobs have largely failed” and Obama’s goal of creating 5 million new green jobs within 10 years is a “pipe dream.” Green Job + Pipe Dream = Marijuana Farming! Added Bonus! >> Smithee’s Movie Tip: Idiocracy 2006

Barbi twins: Obama abandoned the horses. “Congress approved the Conference Committee report on spending bill H2112 for Thanksgiving, giving funding to USDA for horse meat inspections and lifted the 6 year slaughter ban. More than 70% of Americans don’t want slaughter houses here. While Obama was pardoning a turkey, he abandoned our horses.” Too bad he won’t abandon his presidency.

Not one of the Barbi twins…

Senate Approves Bill that Legalizes Sodomy and Bestiality in U.S. Military. “The Senate on Thursday evening voted 93-7 to approve a defense authorization bill that includes a provision which not only repeals the military law on sodomy, it also repeals the military ban on sex with animals–or bestiality.” Surely this is in sensitivity to the muslim soldiers…

Euro and risk currencies rally, China PMI looms. Tumble, tumble, tumble! Watch the dollar tumble! RAWHIDE!

All in the name of ‘art’: The 65-year-old professor who poses nude with students. No wonder the price of education has gone up – liability insurance is expensive! Oh, and extra credit is a b*tch.

Taliban fighters get £100 a month to stop shooting our troops. “They are also effectively given an amnesty, meaning they will not face trial even if they have attacked and killed British forces, or committed other atrocities, such as the murder of women and children.” They also get to keep their AK47s. What could possibly go wrong?

Second electric car battery fire involving Chevy Volt. “The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration said Friday that three Volt battery packs were crash-tested last week. In one instance, the battery caught fire afterward, and in another the battery emitted smoke and sparks.” GM blamed goverment officials for “not storing the tested batteries correctly”. It seems, finally, that every last finger has been pointed.

Wife proves quite ‘handi’ in kitchen for all the wrong reasons. Zainab tried a new ingredient for Korma yesterday – her husband. The korma popularised in UK curry houses is invariably mildly spicy and may often feature nuts, usually almonds or cashews, and coconut.

Not exactly Top Chef material. Catchy title? or just a lame reason for posting a photo of Padma Lakshmi?

See more here.

Russian News Anchor Gives Obama The Middle Finger On Live TV… Think of the number of people who do this to the TV when Obama is on… Can anyone translate this for us?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=E7jKKZTpzh4

Obama Gives Poor Free Internet After U.N. Says It’s A Basic Human Right. Following a laughable United Nations declaration that high-speed internet access is a basic human right, the Obama Administration is investing north of $400 million to expand broadband into poor, rural areas of the U.S. The Human Rights Council of the United Nations General Assembly recently determined that, like healthcare, shelter and food, broadband access is a basic human right that allows people to “exercise their right to freedom of opinion and expression.” Shall we call it FREE ObamaNet?

Saudi women with attractive eyes may be forced to cover them up. “Women in Saudi Arabia already have to wear a long black cloak, called an abaya, cover their hair and, in some regions, conceal their faces while in public. If they do not, they face punishments including fines and public floggings. They are also banned from driving by religious edict and cannot travel without authorisation from their male guardians.” All this to prevent women from being too “tempting”. Just how weak are these muslim perverts? Wouldn’t be easier to blindfold the men?

http://youtu.be/3Al9blQOhNw

Vatican slams Benetton ‘unhate’ campaign. “Clothing firm Benetton has been heavily criticised by the Vatican for using an image of Pope Benedict kissing an imam on the mouth in its latest shock advertising campaign.” The Pope is ANGRY! Barry, not so much.

DOD Global Warming Intel Unit Could Be In The Works. “Although the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) already has a special center dedicated to global warming, a new government report claims the nation’s intelligence community needs yet another taxpayer-funded entity to better determine the impact of climate change on national security.” The dreaded threat of the .01 degree heat invasion! AHHH! Run for the hills!! Sure, the middle east is now controlled by radical islam, but it’s that climate change that’ll slit our throats!

KFC – Koran Fried Chicken. “According to KFC’s website, the chain is running a ‘halal trial’ in 96 of its stores. In these outlets, all meat has been killed according to Islamic slaughter methods, with a verse from the Koran recited at the time of slaughter by an ‘appropriate person’.” Animal torture is only a drive-thru away!