Author: J.P. Travis

If this happened to a Republican… it would push coronavirus off the front page. Friday morning, former Florida gubernatorial candidate Andrew Gillum, a Democrat with a wife at home, was found puking in a hotel bathroom by ambulance personnel called by a third party to rescue a gay prostitute who was near death from a methamphetamine overdose.

Ignorant Muslim clerics of Iran hit new low. Even for Muslims this is startlingly stupid: they’ve been telling Iranians to kiss, shake hands, and lick Muslim shrines in order to spread the coronavirus faster and thereby build up herd immunity. The result: new satellite photos show them digging mass graves.

Bill Clinton describes sex with Monica as “things I did to manage my anxieties.” Based on all those trips to Pedophile Island with Jeffrey Epstein on the Lolita Express, he’s had a lot of anxiety since he left the White House, too.

Who needs Secret Service protection? Twice last night during his victory speech, Jill Biden jumped in front of attacking vegans to protect her husband. She’s like a pit bull in heels.

Man released under “sanctuary city” rules sexually assaults 3-year-old. It was never a question of if or when this was going to happen, but how often.

Journalist who virulently defended Katie Hill was dating her. When the congresswoman’s scandal first broke, Playboy Washington correspondent Alex Thomas defended her adamantly, even making wild claims about the NRCC shopping the scandalous photos, claiming he had evidence to back up his claims. Turns out he had no evidence. Turns out he had to walk back his claims. Turns out he was dating the scandalous congresswoman.

Joe Biden to South Carolina crowd of African Americans:

“I’m looking forward to appointing the first African American woman to the United States Senate.”

1) We’ve already had more than one African American woman elected to the Senate, including the one who was running against him for president, and

2) Presidents don’t appoint senators. Ever.

But the ignorant-ass audience cheered so apparently South Carolina Democrats are as dumb as Joe.

Pakistan to send 100,000-strong duck-army against locusts. The question for this army is the age-old question leaders always have about any army: will it stand and fight, or will it quack?

Crazy Bernie wants to help minorities by teaching them to sell drugs. Reminds us of an old saying Bernie ought to be familiar with since he’s as old as dirt: “Go teach your grandmother to suck eggs.”

Greatest. Twitter reply. Ever. When Keith Ellison gets done smoking, he should retire in shame and never show his face again.

Did you know Beau Biden was Attorney-General of the U. S.?

Did you know Joe Biden was arrested in South Africa?

Neither did anyone else. Just like nobody knew he was a coal miner. It seems there is a divergence between reality and Joe’s delusional imagination.

Gee, who saw that coming? (No pun intended) Andre Patterson, who was in prison for the “attempted murder of a government employee” (which probably means a cop) and then was convicted of murdering his cellmate, at some point decided he was a woman so they transferred him to a woman’s prison… even though he is anatomically male… where he is now accused of raping his cellmate.

NH man arrested for attacking 15-year-old Trump supporter. Look at that mugshot: the crazy is strong with this one. And the scariest part? He had just come from voting.

He said WHAT!? In New Hampshire a college student stood up and asked Joe Biden to explain his poor showing in Iowa. His reply to her:

“It’s a good question. Number one, Iowa is a Democratic caucus. Have you ever been to a caucus? No, you haven’t. You’re a lying dog-faced pony soldier. You said you were, but you’re–now you gotta be honest. I’m gonna be honest with you.”

How will Michael Mann ever sit down again? After getting his ass thoroughly verbally kicked by this Australian legislator? If you read this speech from beginning to end you will find yourself laughing out loud and cheering for the guy who gave it… and wishing you were Australian so you could vote for the guy.

Iowa caucuses turn into giant flustercuck. Again. We don’t have anything against the people in Iowa, but clearly they are unable to run any sort of election competently. This is the fourth presidential election in a row where the caucus process completely broke down and failed. It’s time to question why Iowa gets to go first in primary season and thereby embarrass the whole nation.

Another peaceful Muslim goes on mass stabbing rampage in London. The mayor of London must trade crime-fighting ideas with the mayor of New York.

Fox network refuses abortion survivors’ Super Bowl ad. But they did approve a commercial featuring two drag queens.

Man attacked and killed by his own cock. And that, CNN, is how you write a headline.

CNN analyst admits fabricating conversation between GOP senators. Joe Lockhart is the yahoo’s name and by the time he admitted he made it up, other liberal journalists were already re-tweeting his bullshit all over the Internet. And here’s the real irony: he recently appeared on the CNN show “Reliable Sources.”

Karma: West Virginia invites Virginia county to join their state. Apparently, a Supreme Court decision from 1861 reserved in perpetuity the ability of Franklin County to leave Virginia and join West Virginia, and with the current mismanagement and tyranny of Democrats in Virginia… well, this might be the time for Franklin residents to beat a hasty exit.

NBC News suggests it is illegal to vote for Trump. And people who do should be arrested for racism. No seriously, they really did say this. They have a whole column about it: a perfect example of the sorry, embarrassing, childish state of journalism in 2020.

Jabba the Jihadi arrested in Iraq. Those ISIS leaders seem to be eating fairly well, eh? According to Iraqi cops, this guy issued fatwas for the execution of ISIS enemies… apparently with a little too much emphasis on the “fat”.

The Swamp Strikes Back. After the FBI admitted and apologized for lying to the FISA court and abusing the FISA process, the FISA court announced it is hiring David Kris—a former Obama administration lawyer who has appeared on “The Rachel Maddow Show” and written extensively in support of the FBI’s surveillance practices for the left-wing blog Lawfare—to oversee the FBI’s implementation of reforms.