I HATE THE MEDIA ™

Steve Bridges dead at 48. One talented man. Our thoughts go to his family. If you’ve never seen his George Bush impersonation… you owe it to yourself to look it up.

Revealed: Barack Obama’s gay transgender prostitute nanny who made him laugh by trying on his mother’s lipstick. “‘Evie’ (pictured in drag) cared for the boy she called Barry (inset) when his mother Ann Dunham moved to the Indonesian capital of Jakarta in the late 1960s. Openly gay, she would leave the house dressed in full drag – but was very careful that Barack never saw her. After the family moved back to Hawaii, she started to work as a prostitute and now lives in a slum.” Everything Barry touches ends up screwed and out of work.

Seeing Obama live for the first time: “This is one strange dude — part narcissist, part Chicago ward heeler, part neo-Alinskyite marxist, part talk show host smoothie, part nowhere man.” “The ideas might be there, traceable back to Ayers, Dohrn, and Reverend Wright, but he has pushed them far away, almost as if he were trying to forget them. They were no longer functional and had to go, but he is left with… what?” Golf.

Breitbart’s last work: The Vetting, Part I: Barack’s Love Song to Alinsky. “Andrew did not want to re-litigate the 2008 election. Nor did he want to let Republicans off the hook. Instead, he wanted to show that the media had failed in its most basic duty: to uncover the truth, and hold those in power accountable, regardless of party.” Let it be so.

Wiki leaks: Obama secretly took Russian money for his campaign. Looks like Putin has been Putin some money on Comrade Obama. We wonder what the payoff is?

Debbie Wasserman Schultz: “It would take 45 years to produce out of oil shale from the Keystone Pipeline as much oil as we save in the increase in fuel efficiency standards from President Obama’s policy that would be implemented by the middle of the next decade.” We think she’s trying to say Obama’s policies will save as much oil by 2025 as the Keystone Pipeline will produce in 45 years. Fine. What’s wrong with doing both things?

White House to Congressional Dems: no money for you. Democratic congressional leaders were hoping for $30 million but it’s not happening. “It was a stark admission from a presidential campaign once expected to rake in as much as $1 billion of just how closely it is watching its own bottom line.” Maybe Barry can lower his “My dinner with Obama” price again. Cue the 1930s fave “Ten Cents a Dance”!

Obama Adviser: ‘References to Size, Power or Sexual Potency…Could be Banned From Automobile Advertising’. John P. Holdren aka “NutJob”, the White House science adviser to President Barack Obama, thinks the government should force advertisers to remove all that sexy talk from what they consider to be “bad” products. Holdren is a “population control” kook too. GOD complex anyone?

Full schematic of Chevy Volt. Note: no user-serviceable parts. For service, contact nearest Obama political crony only.

Buffalo, NY teachers get free plastic surgery. “The sweet deal that all the 3,400 teachers in Buffalo are eligible to get under one of their insurance plan options, they are billed nothing for any plastic surgery procedure, such as botox, liposuction, tummy tucks, and there is no deductible. Last year, Buffalo’s schools spent $5.9 million on plastic surgery which is also known as a cosmetic rider.” Apparently the plan doesn’t cover cranioanal extractions.

Did Iran test a Nuclear Bomb in North Korea in 2010? “…the Obama administration’s intelligence chiefs claim that Iran is not an imminent threat, while a former top German official warns of immediate danger to the Jewish state. The fact is that there are some Germans who do not want to be responsible for a second Holocaust.” The first “evidence” of an Iranian bomb may be when it goes “BOOM!”

Obama: Iran problems Bush’s fault. Yup, when all else fails, blame Bush, who’s apparently still president more than 3 years into the Obama administration.

If government treated obesity the way it treats sex, it would encourage schoolchildren to explore their enjoyment of Twinkies, Oreos, and moon pies… What if government just went back to “fact-finding” Bali junkets and playing golf and left us the hell alone?

Three Occupy Oakland protesters arrested for robbery and a hate crime, both felonies. Memo to Barack Obama: your “Tea Party” called, they need more bail money. Memo to Elizabeth Warren: thanks for the “intellectual foundation” you provided.

Look out Kate Upton, AZ pol pushing anti-Photoshopping bill! Nanny States of America! We’re not going to tell you what you can and cannot do… we’ll just make the prices “necessarily skyrocket.”

Why Re-Electing Obama Could Bring An Economic Disaster. Could? It should be titled ‘Why Re-Electing Obama Will Make the Current Economic Disaster Worse.’

Japan invents speech-jamming gun that silences people mid-sentence. Build it right into the teleprompter, right? Unfortunately, it might not work on Obama: “They found that the device works better on people who were reading aloud than engaged in “spontaneous speech” and it cannot stop people making meaningless sounds, such as “ahhh,” that are uttered over a long time period.”

Winning the future, one sign at a time. Undoubtedly a bus that uses solar-powered plastics and lubricants, eh?

It’s campaign season and that means it’s time for more fainting at Obama rally. “Bread and circuses” was the ancient Roman politicians’ formula to distract the rubes’ attention away from bad news and attain political power. Today, the world is out of bread so let’s have a big hand for your ringmaster, Barack….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=RE8rCP0-ROs

I Have A Say (In How You Have to Spend Your Money to Get Me Laid): Sandra Fluke. There has been some controversy over certain talk-show hosts insinuating (although in jest) that this girl is a prostitute. We disagree. We disagree most emphatically. Prostitutes don’t have any problems getting persons to pay them for sex. This girl, on the other hand, can’t seem to get a John without an act of Congress.

Revealed: US plans to charge Assange. We’re conflicted. We like knowing what our government is doing. But at the same time we don’t want to endanger national security or diplomacy that can only exist along with discretion. So we will content ourselves with pointing out the obvious. This is what happens to the idiots when they are no longer useful.

Abbott & Costello explain the unemployment problem. You don’t need Bud and Lou to make a comedy sketch out of the unemployment stats nowadays, the BLS does a pretty good job of that themselves. Or as the MSM might say, “unexpectedly funny.”

GM suspending Chevy Volt production due to low demand. Well how’s President Obama going to buy one now? We suggest a new advertising campaign themed “Only Dolts Buy Volts” with video of people like the President, Barbara Boxer, Barney Frank, Anthony Weiner, Nancy Pelosi and other Democrats buying a new one (with their own money).

Public Pension Ponzi Scheme; New York cities borrow from pension plan to make contributions. Borrowing from Peter to pay Peter… and yet, people say “you can trust the gubbermint to make good decisions” with a straight face.

Andrew Breitbart, dead at 43, was to release explosive tapes featuring Obama. Coincidence or was he assassinated? So, where’s the tapes?