Swedish scientists prove Obama should not be compared to a chimp

"I knew Santino the chimp. Santino the chimp was a friend of mine. Mr. President, you're no Santino the chimp."
"I knew Santino the chimp. Santino the chimp was a friend of mine. Mr. President, you're no Santino the chimp."

Last month, the New York Post and one of its cartoonists caught holy hell. All because Al Sharpton and his racemongering posse decided the paper’s infamous “chimpanzee” cartoon intentionally compared Obama to a chimp.

Now Swedish animal behaviorists have conducted a study that proves our President is absolutely nothing like a chimpanzee.

According to a report in Current Biology, Santino, a 31-year-old alpha male chimpanzee in a Swedish zoo starts each day by collecting rocks inside his enclosure. Around midday he begins hurling those rocks from his weapons cache at human visitors who have gathered outside his enclosure.

We have analyzed this study in great depth and determined that Al Sharpton is correct. It is offensive to compare the President to a chimp for the following reasons:

Unlike President Obama, the chimp developed a clear plan and followed it.

Unlike President Obama, the chimp knows he must save his assets and not throw them away all at once.

Unlike President Obama, the chimp believes in stockpiling weapons to use against his enemies.

Unlike President Obama, the chimp is dedicated to defending his homeland.

Unlike President Obama, the chimp didn’t announce that he wanted to negotiate with any of the “moderate” humans who hold him captive.

Unlike President Obama, the chimp hasn’t announced that he will stop throwing rocks in 19 months.

And finally, unlike President Obama, the chimp didn’t demand that the rich gorillas in the next cage share their rocks with him.

We don’t like to brag on ourselves at IHateTheMedia.com, but it’s rare to find one website that is able to analyze science and political science in such a deep, meaningful way and explain it so clearly to the masses.

SOURCE: Associated Press

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