Keith Olbermann – I HATE THE MEDIA ™

How Goodfellas kept us from acquiring a priceless Keith Olbermann memento

When we found out that Olbermann’s Golden Mike was for sale on eBay, we realized that we wanted it more than life itself.

Back in 1986 Keith Olbermann won a semi-prestigeous Golden Mike Award when he was a silly-looking sportscaster on KNX-TV in Los Angeles

Randy Kerdoon currently does news at KNX Newsradio in Los Angeles and he found a copy of Olbermann’s award in the trash bin when KNX was moving from one building to another.

When we found out that Randy had offered the Golden Mike for sale on eBay, we realized that we wanted it more than life itself. After all, who wouldn’t want a little piece of a broadcasting legend like Olbermann.

We weren’t sure what we’d do with it, but there are always doors that need to be propped open and bugs that need to be squished, so we were pretty sure it would come in handy.

We were willing to go as high as $200. The bidding on eBay rapidly reached $129, but then just sat at that price day after day. The bidding was scheduled to end at about 4:40 p.m. last Sunday so we it flagged on our calendar, fully intending to swoop in at the last minute and place the winning bid.

Then we got busy watching Goodfellas on TV for the 27th time and just plain forgot about Olbermann’s award. Our computer was in the next room and we didn’t hear it beeping out its alerts and the damn award sold for the $129 ($145 including shipping).

LARadio.com reports the results of the auction:

The ‘Mike’ sold for over $145 including shipping to a Keith Olbermann fan in Texas. Her reason for buying it was touching. Seems she and her husband were watching Olbermann co-host the Vice-Presidential debates at night a few years ago. Her husband wasn’t feeling well. He excused himself to go to bed and told her as he left ‘now you just stay down here with Keith.’ He passed away the next day. So basically the last real conversation she had with her husband was about Keith Olbermann.

If the Editor dies tomorrow morning, Mrs Editor will remember that the last story he ever wrote was about Keith Olbermann.

Our post mortem advice: Don’t buy any old awards to commemorate the event, honey.

H/T: LARadio.com

Keith Olbermann looking for hippies to fill the streets in protest

Oh, how Keith Olbermann longs for those glorious days of his youth when the streets were filled with protesters and the air was filled with smoky haze of a million joints.

Here’s his plaintive response to the passing of the debt ceiling deal:

And the only response is to be organized and unified and hell-bent in return. We must find again the energy and the purpose of the 1960′s and early 1970′s and we must protest this deal and all the God damn deals to come, in the streets. We must arise, non-violently but insistently. General strikes, boycotts, protests, sit-ins, non-cooperation take-overs – but modern versions of that resistance, facilitated and amplified, by a weapon our predecessors did not have: the glory that is instantaneous communication.

The problem with this concept is that Keith Olbermann’s audience couldn’t fill a phone booth, much less the streets of a small village.

Hilarious: Olbermann has to pay guests to appear on his low-rated TV show

Guests generally appear on most broadcast and cable news shows for free. But that’s not how it currently works for Olbermann at Current TV.

Guests generally appear on most broadcast and cable news shows for free. They do it for the exposure, to help them sell books or newspaper columns or to build reputations. But that’s not how it currently works over at Current TV.

Business Insider has the inside info:

Interesting tidbit form Keith Olbermann’s Q&A with Cindy Adams in today’s New York Post.

Here’s how Olbermann made sure his new Countdown on Current got good guests: he pays them.

Being a smaller network, any difficulty in getting A-1 guests?

“It was a concern considering we’re starting from scratch, so I decided to formalize guests. Pay them even if it’s not much money. Make law professors, nonpolitical people, contributors. We built this in a matter of weeks, but the baseline is we’ve formalized it so it wouldn’t be a problem.

Paying guests is unusual, but certainly not unheard of. We wouldn’t be surprised to find out that Olbermann has to pay viewers, too.

And there ain’t enough money in the world.

Source: Business Insider

A confederacy of douches: Keith Olbemann wants Anthony Weiner to join Al Gore’s TV network

If there were ever three kindred spirits, they would have to be Keith Olbermann, Anthony Weiner and Al Gore. Dickhead, dick, and dickless.

Olbermann, making the rounds of the media to promote the premiere of his new show on Gore’s failed Current TV, responded when Jimmy Fallon asked if Weiner might eventually end up on CNN.

CBS News reports the former MSNBC host’s supposedly witty riposte:

“Well, you know, I’ve got a nine o’clock show that I am probably going to hire somebody for,” Olbermann told Fallon, referring to the space immediately after his upcoming new show, Countdown with Keith Olbermann on Current TV.
Fallon asked Olbermann if would hire Weiner.

“Eliot Spitzer is doing okay on CNN at eight o’clock,” Olbermann replied with a smile.

Spitzer’s doing OK? Looks like Olbermann is playing as fast and loose with the truth as ever.

Friday, the night that Olbermann uttered these words, Bill O’Reilly had over 3,000,000 viewers. Nancy Grace wrangled in 1,677,000 on HLN. Lawrence O’Donnell attracted 903,000 to MSNBC. And Spitzer drew a mere 541,000.

So now we know what Current considers the benchmark of success: Half the viewers of the number three show in the time slot.

Source: CBS News, MediaBistro.com

Al Gore, Keith Olbermann and Rupert Murdoch walk into a bar

What are the odds of finding one story that includes Al Gore, Keith Olbermann and Rupert Murdoch? Well, this is your lucky day.

In short, Rupert Murdoch hates Keith Olbermann. Al Gore hired Olbermann to work at Current TV. Murdoch-owned Sky Italia TV dropped Current TV from its programming roster. In Gore’s mind, A equals B and B equals C, therefore A equals C.

gore-olbermann — Does anyone know how to say "pompous asses" in Italian?

The Guardian UK reports on the Vice President’s paranoia:

He [Gore] added that the decision reflected how News Corporation operated worldwide. “News Corporation is an international conglomerate with an ideological agenda. It seeks political power in every nation they operate. They wield that power to shut down voices that disagree with the agenda of Rupert Murdoch,” Gore said.

The decision, he added, was “a complete shock” but Current TV executives were told “off the record that the decision was taken on News Corp instructions from New York”. The primary reason, he said, was “because Current is launching Keith Olbermann next month”.

Olbermann – who styles himself as a leftwing alternative to the rightwing shock jock journalism of Fox News – worked at rival cable news network MSNBC until he left abruptly in January. This came after he was briefly suspended by MSNBC in November for making donations to three Democratic candidates in the midterm elections without seeking prior approval, in breach of company rules. “Olbermann has often been critical of News Corporation,” Gore added.

It’s always someone else’s fault with liberals. Why can’t Gore just accept that no one in Italy wants to watch an American network that even Americans don’t want to watch?

Source: Guardian UK

Keith Olbermann update: No one wants to work for the world’s worst person

Still in need of an executive producer and other staff, famously difficult Olbermann has crawled back to his contacts at MSNBC, many of whom he offended while there, to beg for staff.

This is one of the best stories we’ve ever heard. Keith Olbermann is denying it –- repeatedly denying it, we might add –- but you tell us if it doesn’t sound 100% probable.

angry olbermann — Pompous. Arrogant. Angry. Nasty. Bitter. Self-centered. Sounds like the perfect boss.

The New York Post reviews the current situation at Current TV:

Gasbag Keith Olbermann can’t seem to wrangle staff for his Current TV show, “Countdown.” Still in need of an executive producer and other staff, famously difficult Olbermann has crawled back to his contacts at MSNBC, many of whom he offended while there, to beg for staff. “Everyone is laughing,” said a source. “They would never leave the network to work for him.”

Pompous. Arrogant. Angry. Nasty. Self-centered. Bitter. Fired from every job he’s ever had. Sounds like the perfect boss.

Applications now being accepted at Current TV.

Source: New York Post

Keith Olbermann proves he’s an even bigger ass than you ever suspected

During a Cornell University Q & A session, Olbermann took a question from the president of the university’s conservative club. His answer is exactly what you’d expect from Olbermann.

Keith Olbermann was invited to speak at Cornell University, his alma mater. Apparently, Charlie Sheen was unavailable.

During the Q & A session, Olbermann took a question from the president of the university’s conservative club.

His answer is exactly what you’d expect from Olbermann.

Source: Breitbart.tv

Keith Olbermann’s new network has fewer viewers than IHateTheMedia.com has readers

Can Keith Olbermann increase the audience at Al Gore’s Current TV? Well, let’s just say that the bar has been set pretty damn low.

The Hollywood Reporter has the devastating details:

keith olbermann current tv — You could fit all of Current TV's viewers in an average NBA arena. With room to spare.

Olbermann’s Current show will likely premiere in late May, when the non-compete clause in his exit agreement with NBC Universal will have reached its conclusion. Sources tell THR that that agreement also stipulates that Olbermann cannot work for any network considered a competitor.

“He had no choice but to go to a place like Current because his non-compete excluded just about every other place,” said an MSNBC insider.

Current averaged 18,000 homes in primetime for fourth quarter 2010, lower than any other network measured by Nielsen.

They averaged just 18,000 homes? For god’s sake, man, that’s pathetic. When a network has fewer viewers than IHateTheMedia.com has readers, you have nowhere to go but up.

As we reported the other day, MSNBC’s ratings have completely tanked since Olbermann was unceremoniously shown the door. The universe of far left television have proven to be a mere sliver of the population, so one would assume that there will be a direct relationship between any increase in Current TV viewers and a decrease in MSNBC viewers.

“It needs salt,” one cannibal said to another.

Source: Hollywood Reporter

Ratings disaster at MSNBC: That sound you hear is the muffled chortle of Keith Olbermann

Keith Olbermann’s last show on MSNBC was on Friday, January 21. Who would have guessed that he was the glue that held that network together? Without him, its ratings have fallen off a cliff.

Look at this comparison of ratings and audience size on Thursday, February 10 vs. Thursday, January 21, the day before Keith Olbermann’s sudden departure from MSNBC.

It shows that Fox has picked up huge numbers of viewers and CNN has picked up considerably fewer viewers, but MSNBC has absolutely imploded. Wow. It must be vodka and prescription drug time around 30 Rock.

Network	Show	Jan 21	Feb 10	(+/-)
Fox	O’Reilly	2,918,000	3,325,000	+407,000
Fox	Baier	1,940,000	2,335,000	+395,000
Fox	Hannity	2,079,000	2,293,000	+214,000
Fox	Beck	1,780,000	2,243,000	+463,000
Fox	Shep	1,786,000	1,936,000	+150,000
Fox	Greta	1,460,000	1,744,000	+286,000
MSNBC	8:00 PM	1,106,000	843,000	-267,000
CNN	Morgan	1,025,000	941,000	-86,000
MSNBC	9:00 PM	976,000	765,000	-211,000
MSNBC	10:00 PM	855,000	575,000	-280,000
CNN	Cooper	826,000	740,000	+86,000
MSNBC	6:00 PM	760,000	592,000	-168,000
MSNBC	7:00 PM	700,000	677,000	-23,000
MSNBC	5:00 PM	612,000	844,000	+232,000
CNN	Blitzer	524,000	1,036,000	+512,000
CNN	ParkerSpitzer	522,000	724,000	+202,000

Let’s analyze these numbers by hour rather than by host, because, quite honestly, we tried breaking it down that way but the shuffling of hosts made it almost impossible for us to comprehend our own analysis.

MSNBC 5:00 – This was the one bright spot for MSNBC. Matthews actually increased his audience from 612,000 on January 20 to 844,000 on February 10 for a gain of 232,000. It’s such a bizarre anomaly in the overall MSNBC disaster that we don’t quite know what to make of it. So let’s just say congratulations, Chris. It appears that you are now MSNBC’s biggest star. Of course, that concept must be driving MSNBC programming executives onto the ledges atop 30 Rock.

MSNBC 6:00 – When they call Cenk Uygur a temporary fill-in host, the emphasis is on temporary. He took Ed Schultz’ 760,000 viewers and turned them into 592,000 viewers. Losing 168,000 viewers is no way to get yourself a full-time gig, Cenkie.

MSNBC 7:00 – Many years ago the Editor had to attend a big quarterly board meeting in New York City. His office had miserable numbers and he dreaded having to report them to the New York bigwigs. He was seated to the immediate left of the Chairman of the Board. When it came time for each office to report it’s quarterly numbers, the Chairman started on his right and went around the table. One after another, each office manager reported worse results than the previous one had. By the time it got to the Editor, he was able to say, “Well, we aren’t making what we’d hoped for, but we’re still turning a slight profit” and the room erupted in applause simply because the numbers sucked less than everyone else’s. That’s the position Chris Matthews finds himself in. The bad news? He lost 23,000 viewers. The good news? Everyone else at MSNBC lost a lot more.

MSNBC 8:00 – Keith Olbermann’s numbers were nothing to brag about, but O’Donnell makes him look like a ratings god. The time slot has gone from 1,106,000 viewers with Olbermann at the helm to a meager 843,000 with O’Donnell. Career enhancement opportunities do not follow losing 267,000 viewers in 30 days.

MSNBC 9:00 – So much for those tall tales of Rachel Maddow’s star power. Without Olbermann as her lead-in she lost 211,000 viewers.

MSNBC 10:00 – Poor Ed Schultz was convinced that the only thing keeping him from success even bigger than his head was a better time slot. So in the wake of Olbermann’s departure, MSNBC moved him from his 5:00 fringe-of-prime time slot to the much-coveted 10 pm slot. The audience responded by pretending Ed was a sinking ship and they were rats. Not only did Ed attract 185,000 fewer viewers at 10 pm than he did at 5 pm, but he also managed to lose 280,000 of the viewers that Lawrence O’Donnell had attracted when he filled the 10 pm slot. Nice work, Ed. We would have said that was impossible, but you proved us wrong.

Source: MediaBistro, MediaBistro

The trifecta: Roseanne Barr, Keith Olbermann and Olbermann’s eyebrows, all in one story

We googled Christina Aguilera’s screeching version of the Star Spangled Banner at the Super Bowl and stumbled upon this fascinating video clip.

Let’s go back to 1990 when Roseanne Barr did the all-time worst rendition of the national anthem at a San Diego Padres game.

Let’s go back to when Keith Olbermann was the sports guy on a local Los Angeles TV station commented on that event.

And let’s go back to when Olbermann’s eyebrows seemed to be independent life forms.

Sad news: Rupert Murdoch won’t be rehiring Keith Olbermann, “He was a nut … it was impossible.”

We have bad news for those of you hoping for a reunion between Rupert Murdoch and Keith Olbermann. It ain’t gonna happen. Murdoch has made it clear he doesn’t want the obnoxious former MSNBC host anywhere near Fox Sports.

The Daily Caller has the disappointing details:

In a FNC interview that aired Wednesday, host Neil Cavuto asked News Corporation CEO Rupert Murdoch if he would consider rehiring Olbermann, who was canned from the network.

“No,” Murdoch said. ”We fired him once, we don’t believe in firing people twice.”
“You called him a ‘nut,’” Cavuto said.

“Well he was a nut on…We had him on ‘Late Night Fox Sports’…It was impossible,” Murdoch said.

Olbermann worked at Fox from 1998 to 2001, when Murdoch gave him the boot.
“I fired him…He was crazy,” Murdoch said.

C’mon, Rupert. Don’t you think it would be fun to rehire Olbermann just so you can fire him again? Kind of like Val Halen does with David Lee Roth and Sammy Hagar every couple years.

Hire him, Rupert. Fire him, Rupert. Make his head spin like Linda Blair in the Exorcist.

Source: Daily Caller

You, sir, are a complete ass

Among Olbermann’s many annoying affectations was one that he sprinkled liberally through his Special Comment feature – the use of the word “sir.”

We were always taught not to speak ill of the departed, but this is Keith Olbermann we’re talking about here, folks, so all rules of civility are off.

Among Olbermann’s many annoying affectations was one that he sprinkled liberally through his Special Comment feature – the use of the word “sir.”

He loved it like heroin addicts love needles. Like liberals love other people’s money. Like socialists love taxes. But we repeat ourselves.

Here’s a compilation of all 173 times Olbermann used the word “sir” in his Special Comment segment.

It really does make him look like the ass he was. And is. And, we fear, will be again someday.

O’Reilly talks about what’s his name who got fired at MSNBC without mentioning what’s his name’s name

Bill O’Reilly took a few minutes to ruminate about The Olbermann Incident without mentioning his former competitor by name. Not once. And from Olbermann’s point of view, that’s probably the worst insult O’Reilly could have delivered.

“They took one of their guys out and then they’re moving everybody else around. Doesn’t matter who he is or why they took him out,” O’Reilly said. “[I] don’t want to get involved with any of that personal stuff.”

When he says they’re moving everybody else around, we’re pretty sure he means like deck chairs on the Titanic.

O’Reilly noted that MSNBC was ranked 28th overall in cable ratings, which he said demonstrated failure, especially considering the fact the network has the resources of NBC behind it.

“Sure, look — we know the double standard, but it is and we’ve accepted the double standard, Bernie and I have because we can’t do anything about it,” O’Reilly said. “Bernie left CBS. I left CBS. Now we are here at Fox News. But let me ask you this: When you read in the print press about all of this garbage and that’s what it is, this network with NBC’s resources behind it to be ranked 28th is a disgrace. That’s a failure. Now they could squeeze out a few million dollars of profit, I guess, but it’s a failure. But the Fox News Channel is a colossal success – colossal success. You never read that. I very rarely read that.”

Source: Daily Caller

Flashback: Olbermann says Glenn Beck knows nothing about how TV works, names him “World’s Worst Person”

Last November, Glenn Beck was bestowed with the honor of being named World’s Worst Person by Keith Olbermann. What had Beck done to deserve this singular honor? He had the temerity to predict that Olbermann would be dumped by Comcast as soon as it completed its acquisition of NBC.

Last November, Glenn Beck was bestowed with the honor of being named World’s Worst Person by Keith Olbermann.

What had Beck done to deserve this singular honor? He had the temerity to predict that Olbermann would be dumped by Comcast as soon as it completed its acquisition of NBC. They were, Beck said, more interested in building an audience and generating profits than spewing left wing propaganda.

Those opinions, Olbermann said, were proof that Beck knows nothing – absolutely nothing – about the television businsss.

Sixty days later, Comcast takes over, and whoosh, Olbermann is gone.

Get to Las Vegas, Glenn. You’re on a hot streak.

Let the party begin: Keith Olbermann out at MSNBC

Uh-oh. Looks like Keith Olbermann has worn out his welcome at yet another TV network. The worst person who ever called anyone else the World’s Worst Person is suddenly, unexpectedly out at MSNBC.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWX9QtUwWa4

The Los Angeles Times has the big news:

MSNBC announced Friday night that its marquee “Countdown” anchor and talk show host Keith Olbermann was out. The network did not provide a reason for his abrupt departure.

“MSNBC and Keith Olbermann have ended their contract. The last broadcast of “Countdown with Keith Olbermann” will be this evening. MSNBC thanks Keith for his integral role in MSNBC’s success and we wish him well in his future endeavors,” NBC Universal said in a statement.

Olbermann and his bosses have clashed in recent months. He was suspended in November for two days after revelations that he gave donations to a Democratic political candidate, which was a violation of the company’s ethics policies for news employees.

Our guess is that Ed Schultz is next to go. C’mon, the guy’s act is horrible.

Source: LA Times

Keith Olbermann ends 2010 just as obnoxious as he began it

Looks like MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann is off his medications again. He’s erupted in a flurry of off-color tweets aimed at anyone who has the temerity to challenge his super superior intellect and/or support Fox News.

Richard Nixon once told the California press, “You won’t have Dick Nixon to kick around anymore.” We enter 2011 praying that Keith Olbermann will be there for us to kick around all year long.

It was a very bad year: Keith Olbermann’s ratings down by 25% in 2010

The bad news keeps coming for MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann. The 2010 ratings data is starting to trickle in, and the news is not so great for the Countdown host.

There’s nothing that gets us in more of a schadenfreude-ish mood this time of year than finding out that things aren’t going well for Keith Olbermann. And this story has our schadenfreude meter pegged all the way to the right.

PoliticsUSA.com reports the bad news for Olbermann and the good news for us:

The bad news keeps coming for MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann. The 2010 ratings data is starting to trickle in, and the news is not so great for the Countdown host. In a down year for cable news where all three networks registered a decline in viewers, Keith Olbermann lost 11% of his total audience, but what is most troubling is that among the coveted age 25-54 demographic Olbermann lost 25% of his audience.… Keith Olbermann’s total drop in viewership was 2% higher than MSNBC’s network average, (11% vs 9%). In contrast, Rachel Maddow lost less of her audience than MSNBC as a whole. Maddow only declined by 6% compared to the network’s 11%. Maddow’s total loss was almost half of her lead in Olbermann, (6% compared to 11%). Olbermann also lost a higher than network percentage of those viewers age 25-54. MSNBC lost 18%. Olbermann lost 25%. Maddow only lost 14%.

As Freud said, “Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.” And as schadenfreude said, “Sometimes a horse’s ass is just a horse’s ass.”

Source: PoliticsUSA.com

New York Times says Jon Stewart is today’s Edward R. Murrow. Keith Olbermann hardest hit.

Jon Stewart — despite all his protestations that what he does has nothing to do with journalism — the modern-day equivalent of Edward R. Murrow?

That pathetic sound you hear is Keith Olbermann whimpering over in the corner. The New York Times has undoubtedly devastated the left wing lunatic by naming someone else as this generation’s Edward R. Murrow.

olbermann-murrow — Keith Olbermann is Edward R. Murrow. Just ask him.

We don’t want to get in the middle of this little spat, so we’ll just let the Times explain its own bizarre designation:

Did the bill pledging federal funds for the health care of 9/11 responders become law in the waning hours of the 111th Congress only because a comedian took it up as a personal cause?

And does that make that comedian, Jon Stewart — despite all his protestations that what he does has nothing to do with journalism — the modern-day equivalent of Edward R. Murrow?

… Though the scale of the impact of Mr. Stewart’s telecast on public policy may not measure up to the roles that Mr. Murrow and Mr. Cronkite played, Mr. Thompson said, the comparison is legitimate because the law almost surely would not have moved forward without him. “He so pithily articulated the argument that once it was made, it was really hard to do anything else,” Mr. Thompson said.

How dare they? Why, this is an insult to Olbermann, MSNBC’s self-styled heir to the Murrow legend. Look for him to demand satisfaction. A duel at sunrise, perhaps. The Times’ choice of weapons.

In lieu of a duel, we certainly expect the Times to be named Worst Person in the World. And they deserve that title.

After all, does Jon Stewart sign off his show by saying, “Good night and good luck” like Murrow did? No. Does Jon Stewart remind his viewers that he is the heir to Murrow’s courage and tenacity? No. Is Jon Stewart a pompous ass with no viewers? Oh, wait. That’s an entirely different subject.

Source: New York Times

Obama doesn’t like the left to compare politicians to Nazis. Especially if he’s the politician.

Now that Keith Olbermann has compared Obama to the Nazis, he’s decided that those comparisons are verboten.

We’ve been racking our brain and we just can’t recall President Obama complaining when his left wing cohorts called George Bush a Nazi. But now, now that Keith Olbermann has compared Obama to the Nazis, he’s decided that those comparisons are verboten.

obama-nazi — Don't blame us. Keith Olbermann said it.

Politico.com has the tale of Obama’s displeasure:

White House press secretary Robert Gibbs advised the liberal commenter Keith Olbermann on Monday to refrain from using comparisons to Nazi Germany after the MSNBC host likened President Obama’s deal on tax cuts to Nazi appeasement.   

“Whenever you compare anything to what the Nazis did, if you ever get to that point in your speech, stop, because nothing does, and hopefully, God willing, nothing ever will,” Gibbs told reporters.   

Asked if Obama heard Olbermann’s “special comment,” Gibbs replied, “I doubt the president heard that.”

Olbermann was reportedly devastated by the news that the President doesn’t tune in to catch his nightly therapy session.

“The President doesn’t watch my show? But I went to an Ivy League-ish school. I read James Thurber on the air every Friday. I was once fired by Rupert Murdoch. I say ‘good night and good luck’ at the end of my show just like Edward R. Murrow. The only conclusion I can draw from this unwarranted rejection is that Obama really is a Nazi.”

Source: Politico.com

Keith Olbermann is even angrier at Obama than he is at Republicans. Or maybe it’s the other way around.

As you watch this overbearing Olbermann clip, keep one thing in mind: Keith Olbermann is loyal to principles. But if you happen to forget it, don’t worry, because Keith will remind you.

Would you call this a meltdown? Pseudo-righteous indignation? Over the top smugness? Or all of the above?

As you watch this overbearing Olbermann clip, keep one thing in mind: Keith Olbermann is loyal to principles. But if you happen to forget it, don’t worry, because Keith will remind you.

Sarah Palin’s Alaska inspires other politicians to pitch their own reality TV shows

Following the successful debut of “Sarah Palin’s Alaska,” agents representing other politicians are rushing to Hollywood to pitch reality shows for their clients.

Few original ideas have ever been generated in Hollywood and even fewer have ever come from Washington, DC. The two towns were made for each other.

So following the successful debut of “Sarah Palin’s Alaska” (TLC reported a record 5,000,000 viewers for the premiere episode), agents representing other politicians are rushing to Hollywood to pitch reality shows for their clients.

So here are some other reality programs we’re looking forward to in the near future:

“Harry Reid’s Nevada”

Join the soon to be former Senate majority leader as he goes prospecting for gold on K Street. Visit his boyhood home in Searchlight, Nevada and learn how he became wealthy working in the private sector for a mere two years. Watch him give charisma lessons to other Democrats. Don’t miss a moment when Harry Reid’s Nevada premieres Sunday, Nov. 14 at 9/8C only on MSNBC.

“John Kerry’s Massachusetts”

Deep in the wilds of a Massachusetts gated community, John Kerry faces the toughest decision of his life: where to dock his new yacht. The gang from Jersey Shore make a cameo to explain to Senator Kerry how lowering taxes can promote economic growth and result in more government revenues. Later, Kerry fights for wind power in someone else’s backyard. It’s “John Kerry’s Massachusetts” premiering Monday, November 22 at 9/8C on CNN.

“Barbara Boxer’s California”

Wham-Bam-Don’t-Call-Me-Ma’am. Barbara Boxer gets in a tiff with a barista at Starbucks who refuses to call her grande skinny latte a “Senator Grande Skinny Latte.” Join Barbara as she explores the California Aqueduct through the dried-up breadbasket of California’s Central Valley and all the way back to the spawning grounds of the endangered delta smelt, stopping, of course, at 5-star resorts along the way. “Barbara Boxer’s California” debuts Tuesday, November 23 at 9/8 Central on MSNBC.

“Elliot Spitzer’s New York”

Experience New York like you never have before as Elliot takes you on a wild romp through the Empire State. Accompany him as he rides bareback through the canyons of the Adirondacks. Catch crabs with the former governor as he plunges his rod into the pristine waters of the Hudson. Bone up on you local history as he navigates the annals of the world’s oldest profession. “Elliot Spitzer’s New York.” Premiering next Friday at 9/8 Central only on IHTM-TV.

“Lisa Murkowski’s Alaska”

Lisa Murkowski debates changing her last name to Smith to ease future write-in campaigns. A trip to the hairdresser ends in disaster when the resulting new doo looks “too modern, like something out of the nineties.” She decides to keep her 70s-inspired locks for additional coverage on the Drudge Report. “Lisa Murkowski’s Alaska.” Don’t miss this special premiere Monday, November 30 at 8/8 Central on Animal Planet.

“Dennis Kucinich’s Ohio”

In this episode Dennis Kucinich plays Risk with two old high school chums, but opts out when the game becomes, “increasingly militaristic.” After accusing his old friends of imperialism, Kucinich breaks from the game to immediately build a peaceful agrarian community on his board. Noam Chomsky makes a guest appearance. “Dennis Kucinich’s Ohio” premieres Monday, November 29 at 9/8 Central only on Pravda TV.

“Barack Obama’s Kenya”

Travel back with the President as he returns to his homeland. Be with him as he makes the adjustment from the imperial opulence of the White House to the spartan furnishings of his brother’s one-room shack in Nairobi. Travel the land as he seeks out anyone who remembers his birth and pays them to forget it. Watch the dramatic premiere of “Barack Obama’s Kenya” this Sunday, Nov 28 at 9/8 Central only on IHTM-TV.

“Chuck Schumer’s New York”

This is the reality show in which the star is never off camera. He stars in all the commercials, voice overs and station breaks. Experience the seesaw excitement as Chuck demeans Wall Street bankers one minute, then strong arms them for campaign contributions the next. Don’t miss “Chuck Schumer’s New York,” premiering November 24 at 8:00 p.m. on PBS.

“Maxine Waters’ South Central”

Yo, what you looking at, honky? Turn your damn TV off. This show is for black people only because you white people have had your own TV shows for too damn long. Co-stars Demond Wilson from “Sanford & Son” and “Rodney King from Can’t We All Just Get Along?” “Maxine Waters’ South Central” debuts November 24 at 8/9 Central on BET.

“Al Franken’s Minnesota”

Al Franken, Minnesota’s favorite son, shows you the highways and byways and underhanded ways of the Land of Ten Thousand Missing Votes. Visit comedy clubs across the state in search of someone who finds him funny. Discover that the Al Franken persona is an act, but the Stuart Smalley persona is real. Don’t miss the series premiere of “Al Franken’s Minnesota,” November 24 at 8/9 Central following the season premiere of Prairie Home Companion on PBS.

Keith Olbermann: Jack Webb? No. Jack-off? Definitely.

We want to point out the empty rhetoric of Keith Olbermann’s Wednesday night attack on Glenn Beck and his 3-part expose of George Soros.

IHateTheMedia.com is a form of civic duty and we’re proud to be able to do our part for the cause. But you know what sucks about it? What really sucks about it? We have to view MSNBC clips.

For example, today we want to point out the empty rhetoric of Keith Olbermann’s Wednesday night attack on Glenn Beck. But in order to provide the correct clip we have to watch the show again, and even worse, and to make sure we get the quotes correct we have to watch it over and over again and listen very closely to make sure we get the transcript correct. And as anyone with a functioning medulla oblongata knows, watching Olbermann even once is painful enough. Watching over and over again is a form of self-imposed cruel and unusual punishment.

But we digress.

In his attack on the three part series Beck is doing on George Soros, Olbermann mocks Beck for making his point with puppets and dismisses the Fox host as paranoid and psychotic.

What he does not do is challenge Beck on a single fact – typical of most left wing attacks on Beck.

Soros, according to Beck, has messianic delusions, despises the United States and provides the funding for dozens of progressive organizations – Media Matters, MoveOn.org, ACORN, Tides Foundation, etc. Many people feel Soros is the man behind the Obama administration itself. The exact amount of money he has funneled to Obama cannot be determined due to the lack of transparency in the collection of foreign campaign contributions during the 2008 presidential election. He supports abortion, atheism, open borders, gun control, legalized drugs, and euthanasia.

Rather than respond to the facts Beck presented, Olbermann lamely reverted to a failed attempt at comedic schtick as a diversion from the real issues.

One can only imagine that Sgt. Joe Friday, with his preoccupation with “Just the facts” would be deemed “unemployable” by the Human Resources department at MSNBC.

– Written by Sonny Palermo

Self-styled Edward R. Murrow sends out his demo reel

You know that a man of Keith Olbermann’s immense talent wouldn’t have been out of work long when he can send out a demo reel featuring this kind of power, this kind of strength, this kind of intelligence, and dare we say it, this kind of charisma.

When a newscaster is looking for a new job, he puts together a reel of his best work and sends it out to prospective employers.

Before it was revealed that the entire Keith-Olbermann-has-been-suspended story was nothing but a publicity stunt, we had high hopes that Keith would end up as the co-anchor on a new Huntley-Brinkley style newscast with Dan Rather at the HD Network. Pairing those two losers would have been pure genius.

But whether it was the HD Network or some other network no one watches, you know that a man of Keith Olbermann’s immense talent wouldn’t have been out of work long when he can send out a demo reel featuring this kind of power, this kind of strength, this kind of intelligence, and dare we say it, this kind of charisma.

Good night and good luck, indeed, Keith. We missed you during your long weekend off.

If you thought Olbermann’s James Thurber readings were ratings killers, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet

In this remarkably unfunny segment, Olbermann attempts to rip Christine O’Donnell by using some of his trademark sophisticated wit. You know, that special brand of liberal comedy gold that’s sooooo far over the heads of ignorant conservatives.

Watch this train wreck for yourself. And tell us if you don’t agree that by the time it’s over even Olbermann knows the entire segment has been one giant stink bomb.

H/T: Mediaite

Keith Who? Rachel Who? Ed Who? No one knows MSNBC’s most popular hosts

If MSNBC’s executives are glass-half-full kind of guys, they look at the results of this new survey and say, “Hey, look at all the growth potential we have.”

If they’re glass-half-empty kind of guys, they say, “We are miserable friggin’ failures, we’re lucky we still have jobs, and the hosts we’ve hired couldn’t attract flies to shit. And come to think of it, that’s really a pretty good analogy.”

msnbc-hosts

Politico.com reports:

unknown-comic — MSNBC hosts are like the Gong Show's Unknown Comic. No one knows who they are. No one cares who they are.

The results show the growing influence that 24-hour cable news has on shaping the political consciousness, despite the fact that network newscasts still draw many multiples of the number of viewers of even the highest-rated cable news shows.…Fox’s opinionated personalities were also rated as having the greatest positive impact on the political debate in the country. Bill O’Reilly was rated as having, by far, the greatest positive impact, with 49 percent of respondents rating him positively, and 32 percent negatively.

…MSNBC’s personalities were largely ranked as unknown by respondents: 70 percent said they had never heard of Ed Schultz, 55 percent said they had never heard of Rachel Maddow and 42 percent said they had never heard of Keith Olbermann.

We would like to nominate the TV remote control as the greatest invention in history. Without it, someone might have actually lingered on MSNBC long enough to be familiar with Olbermann, Maddow and Schultz by mistake. With it, they get the anonymity they so richly deserve.

Source: Politico.com

JPTravis on Pro-Palestianian protesters are backed by a surprising source: Biden’s biggest donors: “That photo says it all. These protesters are spoiled, ignorant slobs. I don’t care at this point whether they are…” May 7, 06:19
deepthinker on Do Not Buy a New Fisker Ocean: “Proving again the old saying. “A fool and their money are soon parted” Anyone who has bought one of these…” Apr 3, 03:52
deepthinker on Justice Jackson Says 1st Amendment Is “Hamstringing The Government” In Efforts To Censor Speech: “The founders knew sooner or later fools like Jackson would pop up and spout off. That is the very reason…” Mar 31, 06:09
StrinaM on Justice Jackson Says 1st Amendment Is “Hamstringing The Government” In Efforts To Censor Speech: “Yes, KBJ, that is EXACTLY how the Constitution was designed: To hamstring the government.” Mar 29, 07:16
ooddballz on Justice Jackson Says 1st Amendment Is “Hamstringing The Government” In Efforts To Censor Speech: “That’s a feature, not a bug.” Mar 25, 04:40