CNN

Pseudo-conservative Kathleen Parker makes fool of herself on CNN. A mouthpiece for establishment Republicans, she was trying to attack Ted Cruz but instead ended up looking silly and ignorant. (Not that the sort of people who watch CNN are likely to have noticed…)

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Rape Victim Challenges President Obama at CNN Gun Control Town Hall: The President tells her that she need not worry about his fiat restrictions because she probably couldn’t defend herself with a gun anyway. So be sure to remember, the next time you hear about the war on women, that it isn’t binders they should fear but rather Presidents that are actively enabling rapists.

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Email Shows CNN’s Invite Only Gun Control “Town Hall” With Obama is a Total Sham. Proof Obama, CNN and sham are synonyms.

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CNN Goes All Out To Cover Missing Plane, Cancels Entire Sunday Morning Lineup. Rumor has it that they’re trying to dump Wolf Blitzer and get Fox Mulder to explain how space aliens did it.

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CNN/ORC Poll: Bush surges to 2016 GOP frontrunner. Communist News Network pushes the guy they think Hillary can beat.

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CNN’s opening paragraph should have been “Even Democrats abandoning Obama.” Instead it was “Barack Obama’s base is behind another term for the president, according to a new CNN/ORC International poll.”

barack-obama-celebrates

Barack Obama celebrates after seeing on CNN that he has been re-elected

It’s really almost amusing to watch the way CNN spins the results of its own poll:

Seven in 10 Democrats say they’d like to see Obama as their party’s presidential nominee next year.

But wait. There’s real news buried somewhere in this article:

That figure may seem promising, but support for Obama’s re-nomination has fallen 11 percentage points since June.

And yet, despite the fact that other polls show the Obama’s support has plummeted with every group that got him elected in 2008, CNN deems Obama re-elected:

Without a prominent primary challenger, Obama’s bid for re-election seems to be safe for now.

His re-election seems to be safe. Not his re-nomination, but his re-election. Move along now. Nothing to see here.

Source: CNN

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After just nine months on the air the former governor of New York is now the former host of a political talk show. Eliot Spitzer has been CaNNed. The smarmy, smirking political prostitute has whored himself out on for the last time. On television, that is.

eliot-spitzer

Eliot Spitzer: The TV talk show host with a face made for radio

The New York Times has the obligatory obituary:

CNN on Wednesday cancelled Eliot Spitzer’s 8 p.m. political talk show, “In The Arena,” after only nine months, and said it would shift Anderson Cooper’s 10 p.m. nightly newscast into the time slot.

The cable news channel also said that Erin Burnett, a new hire from CNBC, would take over the 7 p.m. time slot on weekdays, replacing John King, who will move to 6 p.m. “The Situation Room with Wolf Blitzer,” which currently runs from 5 to 7 p.m., will move to 4 to 6 p.m.

The phrase “rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic” comes to mind.

The shake-up is intended to stabilize CNN’s television ratings and create better transitions between shows. The only prime time show that is unaffected is “Piers Morgan Tonight,” the 9 p.m. interview show that was introduced six months ago.

… The executive in charge of CNN/U.S., Ken Jautz, said in an internal memorandum that the channel is currently “in discussions with Eliot Spitzer about an alternative role.” But Mr. Spitzer’s own statement cast doubt on that possibility; it concluded by saying, “I thoroughly enjoyed my time at CNN.”

Spitzer could have added, “Being a political talk show host was a real role reversal for me. I’d been used to being the john, but CNN gave me the opportunity to get paid for screwing people.”

Two indirect consequences of this action: Kathleen Parker is unable to wipe the smile off her face and Piers Morgan is unable to wipe the flop sweat off his brow.

Source: New York Times

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Based on her first question to President Obama, we don’t think Jessica Yellin, CNN’s new White House correspondent, will keep that front row seat in the White House press briefing room much longer.

She might have couched her question in polite terms, but there’s no doubt that she was mocking the president. Maybe even calling him a liar.

Go to the 4:15-ish mark.

Obama: Jessica Yellin. Congratulations, your first question here.
Yellin: Thank you, Mr. President.
Obama: No pressure. You’re going to do great. (Laughter.)
Yellin: Thank you. Your administration has laid out four different dates by which you’ve said that the debt ceiling must be raised or the U.S. would face potential dire consequences. Three of those dates have come and gone and we haven’t faced financial calamity. Some of your critics have argued that these are then scare tactics to force a deal. So why should the American people believe that the August 2nd deadline is the final deadline by which a deal must be raised? And would you also spell out for us what you believe will happen if the debt ceiling is not raised by that date?

The President who cried, “Wolf!”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rhw9G5EKnhw

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CNN loves the new Arnold Schwarzenegger story. On Tuesday night it covered the former California governor’s paternity scandal at least once every hour.

Well, that’s not quite accurate. We should have said “at least once every hour with the notable exception of one hour.”

eliot-spitzer

The reason Eliot Spitzer doesn't talk about Arnold Schwarzenegger's sex scandal

NewsBusters delivers the specifics:

During its 5 p.m.-12 a.m. EDT coverage, CNN reported the story every hour except during the 8 p.m. EDT slot – the prime-time show In the Arena with Eliot Spitzer. Spitzer made no mention of the story.

Spitzer was embroiled in a scandal of his own just three years ago as governor of New York. A federal wiretap linked him to a high-end prostitution ring, and he resigned his office abruptly after the news was made public…

Spitzer did find time to offer extensive coverage of IMF chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn’s rape allegations. He also hosted for a sympathetic interview the CEO of the NBA’s Phoenix Suns, Rick Welts, who has publicly revealed that he is gay.

Our best guess? Spitzer is offended that he had to pay for it, but Arnold didn’t.

Source: NewsBusters.org

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What the only thing better than watching a former CIA agent smackdown two CNN newsettes? Hearing him say that they’re just carrying water for the Obama administration, that’s what.

Former CIA Counter-terrorism analyst Michael Scheuer is vehemently opposed to the Obama’s administration’s Libyan policy. That, of course, proves that Scheuer is smarter than we are because he’s apparently figured out what that policy is.

Liberty Underground has the smackdown specifics:

Scheuer believes that there isn’t a strong case for America’s intervention especially at a time when the country hasn’t even recovered from the recession. Also, Scheuer had doubts if the rebels that we are arming would really be any better than the Gadaffi regime: “I’m not sure that that the opposition, if it takes power, is going to be much better than was Gadaffi.” Moreover, Scheuer argues that the US involvement in Libya would serve as a recruitment tool for extremists. “In the muslim world, this is Americans killing Muslims again, and it looks like its for oil.”

Scheuer also suggested the rationale behind US involvement in yet another war “at a time when we’re nearly bankrupt.” to which the CNN host, Christine Romans, expressed disagreement suggesting that Libya and US economy are two distinct issues. Scheuer protested “they are not separate issues, ma’am, you’re just carrying the water for Mr. Obama.”

C’mon, Michael, that’s unfair. Give credit where credit is due. They’re also carrying ice cubes and little lemon slices.

H/T: YT

Source: The Liberty Underground

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You learn something every time you watch CNN. For example, until we saw this report we didn’t even know that corporations had anything to do with the dispute in Wisconsin. We thought it was the state versus the public employee unions.

So we’d like to thank CNN’s Carol Costello for informing us that it’s really the corporations that stand to win here. Because, you know, we wouldn’t want them to win. We’d much rather have the blood-sucking union thugs win so that the rest of us can work until we drop to pay for their rich pensions and lavish lifestyles.

CNN, the Most Trusted Name In News. Not to mention the most trust name in propaganda.

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Despite all the hype and all the promotion and a huge first night, Piers Morgan’s ratings are dropping faster than F-bombs from a rapper.

Glenn Garvin, TV critic at the Miami Herald, has the details:

piers-morgan-cnn

Much to his dismay, the former judge on America's Got Talent is learning that America's also got discernment

Talking about ratings in the first couple of weeks of a talk show is usually unfair; it takes a new one time to build an audience. But in Morgan’s case, he’s losing an audience. His show debuted on January 17 with 2.1 million viewers tuning in to see him chat up Oprah Winfrey. They were so impressed that almost half of them didn’t return for day two.

Since then, Morgan’s ratings fell every day except for a small upward blip last Tuesday when Rudy Giuliani was the guest. By the time the Kardashians had finished hyperventilating Thursday night, Morgan had lost more than three-quarters of the viewers he started with last week.

(Hey, you wanna know who’s really enjoying reading this? Larry King. In its final six months, his show was averaging 613,000 viewers, was low enough to get him kicked off the air after 50 years in broadcasting. But it’s about 20 percent bigger than Morgan’s audience Thursday night.)

At the rate Morgan’s ratings are dropping, they’ll soon be smaller than the opening in one of Larry King’s ventricles.

Source: Miami Herald

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No, not that C-word. A completely different C-word. One that had never required an apology until ten days ago.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lt9ulRezH34

CNN’s John King:

“Before we go to break, I want to make a quick point. We were having a discussion about the Chicago mayoral race just a moment ago. My friend Andy Shaw used the term ‘in the crosshairs’ in talking about the candidates. We’re trying, we’re trying to get away from that language. Andy is a good friend, he’s covered politics for a long time, but we’re trying to get away from that kind of language. We won’t always be perfect. So hold us accountable when we don’t meet your standards.”

As you can see in this 1986 commercial, such violent rhetoric is nothing new at CNN. To the best of our knowledge, every CNN star in this commercial for “Crossfire” was assassinated because their participation in a show with such a violent name and for contributing to the nation’s violent discourse.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=au-7n6WIALg

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A little decorum is in order, Mr. Murdoch. Please refrain from dancing on your competitors’ graves while the cameras are rolling.

loser-cnn-msnbc-hln

A special message for CNN, MSNBC and HLN

BusinessInsider.com has details of the decimation:

The ratings are out for 2010.

Perhaps not surprisingly Fox News continued its march of dominance through the cablesphere, clocking its second-highest rated year ever in total viewers.

It was also the only news channel to hit the top 10 in cable networks, ranking fourth in Primetime behind USA, ESPN and TNT.

Want some context for that? Fox News’ total viewers for the year exceeded MSNBC, HLN, and CNN combined.

That dominance came primarily at the expense of CNN which lost 29% of its total viewership in 2010 and 34% of its prime time viewers. Yes, you read that right.

MSNBC, meanwhile stayed the course in total day total viewers – it was the only news channel not to drop in that category — but dropped 5% year over year in prime time total viewers and 9% in the prime time demo.

At MSNBC, Keith Olbermann is reportedly figuring out how to staunch the loss of viewers by consulting with the ghost of James Thurber. At CNN, Anderson Cooper knows he’s doomed because he’s starting 2011 by teaming up again with Kathy Griffin to host the annual New Year’s Eve broadcast. And on HLN … well, we really don’t know what’s going on there because like the rest of the American people, we don’t even know what channel they’re on.

Source: BusinessInsider.com

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If we were giving out awards for the dumbest friggin’ question of 2010, CNN’s Alina Cho would have earned her nomination in the last week of the year.

She interviewed Lorena Bobbitt, who wisely decided that the only way she’d ever get another date was to change her name to Lorena Gallo, in a Where Are They Now segment.

In the middle of the interview, Cho asked what may be the dumbest question ever:

“After all these years, are you finally able to laugh about it?”

Remarkably, the former Mrs Bobbitt says she is able to laugh about cutting off her husband’s penis. No word on whether John Wayne Bobbit is laughing yet.

H/T: Breitbart.tv

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Today’s headlines on CNN: Bombs found in house … students protest tuition hikes … Jeff Daniels has diarrhea … and CNN wonders why its ratings are in the dumper.

Somebody screwed up at CNN. We assume some video editor was watching Dumb & Dumber instead of paying attention to what he was supposed to be doing. The result? A disgusting scene from the raunchy comedy showed up in the middle of a CNN story about, well, we’re not really sure what it was about because, after all, it was CNN and we weren’t paying attention, either.

It can happen. We have a friend who had a brief brush with notoriety back in the late 60s when he was a videotape editor at a TV station in Southern California. Late one night he made the mistake of hitting the wrong button while watching porn at work, sending a graphic scene out over the air.

The bad news? He got fired. The good news? He became famous when Johnny Carson mentioned it in his opening monologue a few nights later.

H/T: Mediaite

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They call themselves The Most Trusted Name in News, but they may have to change that to The Most Lust-filled Name In News. It’s not a newscast, it’s a soap opera.

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John Roberts and Kyra Phillips give the phrase "Action News" a whole new meaning

The New York Post has the lurid details:

CNN anchor Kyra Phillips’ pregnancy with John Roberts could bring big changes at “American Morning,” insiders say. Roberts, who broadcasts from New York, is likely to move to Atlanta to be with his fiancée, who’s expecting twins. Since CNN ex-president Jon Klein recently rebuilt the prime-time lineup, insiders say his replacement, Ken Jautz, will focus on daytime, and his first step will be to dismantle “American Morning,” the lowest-rated cable morning show. We hear the staff is frustrated with co-anchors Roberts and Kiran Chetry.

“John is a tyrant, freaking out over stories and guests, and Kiran is dumb as a rock,” a staffer said. “He has a chip on his shoulder because he was considered the heir apparent to Dan Rather at CBS.” During an interview with David Axelrod last month, Roberts snapped at Chetry on-air for typing too loud. Chetry could be the first go.

The only thing that could make this story better would be a DNA test proving that Larry King is real father of Kyra Phillips’ twins.

Source: New York Post

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If you hear of any television stations or cable news networks that are looking for an ignoramus anchor, please let Rick Sanchez know.

CNN just released this statement:

“Rick Sanchez is no longer with the company. We thank Rick for his years of service and we wish him well.“

This, of course, comes just hours after the public became aware of Sanchez’ satellite radio interview with CNN contributor Pete Dominick in which the now-former anchor said:

“I’m telling you that everybody who runs CNN is a lot like (Jon) Stewart, and a lot of people who run all the other networks are a lot like Stewart, and to imply that somehow they, the people in this country who are Jewish, are an oppressed minority? Yeah.”

We ended our previous Rick Sanchez story by asking the question, “How long until Sanchez is fired?” The answer, it turns out, was about four hours.

Adios, amigo. You were usually good for at least one “stupid anchorman” story each week. So let’s bid Rick a fond farewell by taking a look back at three of Rick’s most embarrassing comments.

This is for you, Rick.

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The stupidest man in news has gone beyond mere stupidity to career suicide. He’s now become the Mel Gibson of cable news.

The CNN moron went off on Jon Stewart and his Jewish bosses on Pete Dominick’s satellite radio show yesterday. He got things rolling by calling Stewart “a bigot” and it went downhill from there.

Dominick: How is he a bigot?
Sanchez: I think he looks at the world through, his mom, who was a school teacher, and his dad, who was a physicist or something like that. Great, I’m so happy that he grew up in a suburban middle class New Jersey home with everything you could ever imagine.
Dominick: What group is he bigoted towards?
Sanchez: Everybody else who’s not like him. Look at his show, I mean, what does he surround himself with? … I’m telling you that everybody who runs CNN is a lot like Stewart, and a lot of people who run all the other networks are a lot like Stewart, and to imply that somehow they, the people in this country who are Jewish, are an oppressed minority? Yeah.

Two questions:

  1. How long until Sanchez is fired?
  2. How long until some liberal media maven calls Sanchez a “conservative bigot?”

UPDATE: The answer to question #2, it turns out, was just four hours. Go to Rick Sanchez fired by the evil Jewish media overlords at CNN

Source: Mediaite

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CNN’s John King must think Carly Fiorina’s new commercial is effective, because he tried to criticize it and her. Fiorina was having none of it. She slapped King around like he was Chris Brown’s girlfriend. In a totally respectful way, of course.

H/T: TheBlaze.com

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Small town radio stations, too poor to field their own reporters and writers, are famous for reading the news straight off the pages of their local newspaper.

Now the Associated Press is accusing CNN of doing the same sort of thing on a much larger scale.

cnn-stealing-associated-press-stories

Breaking news has been replaced by stolen news at CNN

AP has the devious details:

CNN Worldwide President Jim Walton told staff in June that the network was dropping its contract with the Associated Press and would provide its audience with content that is “distinctive, compelling and, I am proud to say, our own.”

But the AP has been closely monitoring CNN’s coverage and claims that the network routinely uses the wire service’s reporting, according to internal memos obtained by The Upshot. CNN, the memo states, “continues to rely heavily, and apparently systematically, on AP breaking news, exclusive enterprise and in-depth reporting.”

… AP spokesman Paul Colford, while not commenting on the memos, summed up the news organization’s problem with the network’s coverage. “CNN continues to make extensive use of AP’s original reporting, even though they no longer pay us for it,” Colford said. “We are monitoring it very closely, and are considering our options.”

CNN. The most trusted name in news. Even if it’s someone else’s news.

Source: Associated Press

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ascot roland martin cnn

There may have been a more embarrassing photo of a TV personality at some point in history, but we doubt it.

If CNN management wants to know why its audience is diminishing so rapidly, they need look no further than the fact that the last guy to wear an ascot on TV was Thurston B. Howell III.

Well, the last guy until effete CNN contributor Roland Martin, that is.

MediaBistro has the details:

CNN contributor Roland Martin is renowned for his sense of style. Specifically, his mastery of the ascot, the tie-alternative that has seemingly been lost to time.

Fear no more, ascot fans. Martin is now selling his own line of ascots … and he is selling them with swagger.

Let’s let Verse 9, which designed the line, explain:

Whether telling it like it is on CNN, hosting “Washington Watch” on TV One, speaking in front of thousands at a conference or taking part in the nightlife of a mega metropolis near you, Roland S. Martin exemplifies the definition of swagger.

As Thurston B. might say, “Delightful, lovey.”

Source: MediaBistro.com

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First ladies have come under fire for everything from their words to their choice of clothes and china. But Obama’s role as the nation’s first African-American first lady adds a racial layer to the microscopic scrutiny her predecessors endured.

Some of the criticism may be driven by partisan politics. But others say the attacks are rooted in white resentment of the “uppity Negro.” They say there is no precedent for a Michelle Obama: a wealthy, independent black woman representing America who is not an entertainer.
In an effort to make Michelle Obama look like a cross between Mother Teresa and Joan of Arc, CNN.com played a bit fast and loose with facts. Heck, they even made some up.

michelle-obama-msnbc-resume-enhancement

Saint Michelle of Chicago, patron saint of MSNBC

In other words, America’s racist honkies would be fine with Wanda Sykes as First Lady.

Well, that’s an opinion and CNN is entitled to theirs, whether it’s adoring Michelle’s “toned, athletic arms” or believing that “Mrs. Obama’s youthfulness and glamour may seem dissonant with the public’s image of what a first lady looks like, particularly in the minds of older members of society.”

But then CNN gets a little “creative” with the facts by saying that Michelle’s independence “…is a big part of her story. She is a self-made woman who rose from a working-class background to become an Ivy League grad and hospital administrator who made good money, all before she met her husband.”

[Click to read all of this, new info you haven’t read before…]

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cnn-unfortunate typo NY mosque

Oooh, that was unfortunate. But in CNN’s defense, perhaps they were referring to the shit storm that’s erupted over President Obama’s contradictory comments about the mosque. Or perhaps they’re referring to the shits who want to build the mosque. Or maybe the people at CNN are just a bunch of dumb shits.

H/T: Gawker.com

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battlestar-galactica-starbuck

Kara Thrace (callsign "Starbuck"), our favorite economist

The what? The who? We thought the Elders of the Economy were a group of aliens from the original Battlestar Galatica, but no.

Turns out that this newly-revered group includes “Alan Greenspan, David Stockman, former budget director in the Reagan White House, and former Treasury Secretaries Robert Rubin and Paul O’Neil” and any other economist or banker who’s ever come out in favor of higher taxes.

According to CNN Money, “Former Federal Reserve chairman Alan Greenspan was first and has taken the most extreme position, arguing that all of the Bush tax cuts of 2001 and 2003 should be allowed to expire.”

Of course, everyone knows that the Obama administration doesn’t want to raise taxes. It’s just so alien (see the Battlestar Galactica connection?) to everything they believe in. “The White House and most Democrats have argued for keeping the taxes cuts in place for most households, but letting them expire for those earnings more than $250,000, about 2% of the country.”

Yes, the Democrats HATE to raise taxes, but if Alan Greenspan says they must, well, then they simply must. Because everyone knows that they worship the former head of the Fed and are obligated to obey his every pronouncement.

Of course, the guys that Democrats now call “Elders of the Economy” are the same guys they were calling “sons of bitches” not too long ago. But all they had to do was mention raising taxes and they were instantaneously transformed into heroes of the Democratic party.

As Starbuck might say, “It sure seems like the Obama administration is all fraked up”

Source: CNN.com

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