Top 10 reasons Obama cancelled the Rapture

by editor on May 23, 2011

Well, another end of the world has come and gone. This time Harold Camping predicted the Rapture would occur on May 21, 2011 at 6 p.m. Eastern time.

And we’re still here. At least We at IHTM are still here. There’s a good chance we wouldn’t be on the short list of folks raptured up.

camping-harold

Harold Camping: Nuttier than Aunt Leota's fruitcake

Our guess is that President Obama cancelled the Rapture with another one of his undisclosed executive orders.

Here are our top ten reasons President Obama did it:

10. Too busy cooking up his own little Armageddon in Israel.

9. Listen. The world will end due to a range of problems associated with anthropological global warming. Got it? Good.

8. Hollywood called. They didn’t have time to prepare the necessary disaster movie.

7. This whole Rapture thing started during the Bush era!

6. Biden slept through the Rapture preparation meeting. Again.

5. Pre-Rapture golfing outing took a little longer than usual.

4. Thought Rapture was a street poet who extols the killing of police officers.

3. God did not clear this with Rapture Czar.

2. From sound of it, New Jerusalem will not need a community organizer.

1. What Rapture? He’s a Muslim.

– Written by Sven Waring at DotPenn.com

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KimmyQueen
Member

He just wasn’t ready to give up his King of Kings and Lord of Lords ambitions.

Ruben
Member
Ruben

Although, in Denver during the 2008 convention, he did have his white horse.

KimmyQueen
Member

He did? :-/

Ruben
Member
Ruben
KimmyQueen
Member

Ahh… interesting. Ty.

RockingHorseGuy
Member

It wasn’t his “top priority.”

KimmyQueen
Member

EXCELLENT. Give RHG an award yo.

Ruben
Member
Ruben

Another reason: Obama hates trumpet music. He’s more of a kazoo buff.

Tesslea
Member
Tesslea

Only the Anti-Christ decides when the world ends, showbama wasn’t about to be one upped.

Homersdad
Member
Homersdad

For once, Obummer wasn’t “caught up in the moment” so to speak.

The Obumbly Obomster
Member
The Obumbly Obomster

He’s waiting until Summer 2011 so he can start the rapture, then declare martial law and remain as King.

However, the lefties were convinced that Bush would do that as well…….i’ll give Obama the benifit of the doubt on this one.

bokk
Guest
bokk

Camping is still alive ala gore, obama, etc ergo winners r wot? the one’s that get the media headwind {media headwind copyright} r the winners, not wot u see or anyone else that reads this, mock when appro and just discount the rest, somone on Huffpo will set the masses right (ie if ur logical and ethical u is fkd).

Jay
Guest
Jay

Your post is way too hard to read. Try actually making the effort to spell words!

Ruben
Member
Ruben

Que? No comprendo, Hombre… in any language.

KimmyQueen
Member

Odd, your first post was just fine… you must have been tired?

Michael Harkins
Guest
Michael Harkins

Oh oh…that picture is not Harold Camping. It is Marshall Applewhite who had 39 of his Heaven’s Gate followers commit suicide in 1997 when Comet Hale-Bopp paid a visit near Earth. Is Camping just as insane as Applewhite was?

bokk
Guest
bokk

and exactly how does this get me Oprah’s endorsement? i ididn’t even know she was one of them jew things. oh by the way Detroit is now a christian free zone, will we have to send back those canuk icey hockeye players or just go back to the 6 team nhl boundaries?