Top 15 reasons CNN anchor Martin Savidge can’t catch his breath

What the hell is going on with CNN anchor Martin Savidge in this clip?

IHateTheMedia.com correspondents around the country have come up with the Top Fifteen Reasons CNN anchor Martin Savidge is short of breath.

1. Those little blue pills also cause shortness of breath!
2. WARNING! Man corsets can cause the vapors!
3. Cross dressing under your suit proves to be a bad idea when the lift and support begins to shrink and squeeze.
4. After “accidentally” locking himself in his dressing room, Martin later.

needed an X-Ray to locate the key.

5. In an unlucky twist of fate, Martin Savidge accidentally witnesses Joy Behar’s body waxing right before going on air.
6. Snow in Atlanta may signal end to easy climate change stories.
7. Guys in control room are showing video of Fox hotties again.
8. Momentarily stunned by suggestion that Taliban insurgents may be terrorists.
9. All mainstream anchors slip into panic attack on mention of the word “Christmas.”
10. Smoking blunts the night before at CNN Kwanzaa party.
11. George W. Bush ordered this asthma attack.
12. Maybe taking the stairs to the 32nd floor was, in retrospect, not a good idea.
13. New FCC air neutrality ruling restricts breaths of media.
14. Picked a horrible time to test out The Bro, a new undergarment for male anchors.
15. The breathtaking decline in CNN ratings.