Global warming may drive aliens to destroy life on Earth. No, really.

It may not rank as the most compelling reason to curb greenhouse gases, but reducing our emissions might just save humanity from a pre-emptive alien attack.

mars-attacks

Until now, the threats climate change cultists warned us about have been terrestrial: sea levels rising, year-round snowfalls, year-round heat waves, etc. That wasn’t enough to frighten change-denying terrorists, so now the believers are rolling out the big guns: aliens!

mars-attacks
On one hand the government says aliens don't exist. On the other hand, the government says aliens will destroy us.

Even the UK Guardian seems a bit skeptical:

It may not rank as the most compelling reason to curb greenhouse gases, but reducing our emissions might just save humanity from a pre-emptive alien attack, scientists claim.

Watching from afar, extraterrestrial beings might view changes in Earth’s atmosphere as symptomatic of a civilisation growing out of control – and take drastic action to keep us from becoming a more serious threat, the researchers explain.

When Neil Armstrong said, “One small step for man…”, one of the lizard people said, “There goes the astronomical neighborhood.”

“Green” aliens might object to the environmental damage humans have caused on Earth and wipe us out to save the planet.

Hmmmm. The aliens sound a lot like progressive Democrats.

“These scenarios give us reason to limit our growth and reduce our impact on global ecosystems.”

ETs may not like the growth that’s already here. We’d advise rich libs like Al Gore to move into eco-friendly huts pronto.

It would be particularly important for us to limit our emissions of greenhouse gases, since atmospheric composition can be observed from other planets,” the authors write.

It’s also important for us to limit our bullcrap emissions since it’s likely that frauds and hypocrites can be spotted from other planets, too.

– Written by Bonfire of the Absurdities

Source: Guardian UK

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