Top 25 reasons Joe Biden fell asleep during President Obama’s deficit speech

by editor on April 14, 2011

Yup. Ol’ Joe chose what some extremist Republicans are calling an inappropriate time to catch a catnap – right in the middle of his boss’ speech on the debt and the deficit.

But the Vice President had a really good excuse. Twenty-five of them, in fact.

  1. Up late last night trying to come up with something incredibly stupid to do while President spoke.
  2. In his dreams, the President is serious about deficit reduction.
  3. He made the mistake of counting members of the mainstream media lining up like sheep to back Obama’s plan.
  4. All those zeros… Zzzzzzeros.
  5. Hey, Gore slept through the 90s and nobody said anything about it.
  6. He was tired from a long day of making sure that only China could have coal plants.
  7. He stayed up all night trying to figure out a good comeback for that smartass at the ice cream shop.
  8. The way the government has been spending money, taking a 20-minute map is like stickin’ it to the man for $4 million.
  9. It’s the Biden Sleep Deficit plan.
  10. That’s not just a nap, that’ fucking serious sleep!
  11. “Barry told me to go ahead, take a nap, and he’ll wake me up when he needs me to add something intelligent.”
  12. Being a word genius is tiring work.
  13. Even the dimmest of bulbs need to be turned off to cool down once in a while.
  14. Up late last night making up phrases that rhyme with “Boehner.”
  15. Nice sunny day, gentle breeze from Barry’s mouth, the endless droning on and on of Barry’s speech … you do the math.
  16. His son Beau put music on Joe’s MP3 player and he fell asleep listening to the unofficial lib lullaby: Ten Years After’s I’d Love To Change The World:

    “Everywhere is freaks and hairies
    Dykes and fairies, tell me where there is sanity
    Tax the rich, feed the poor
    Till there are no rich no more

    I’d love to change the world
    But I don’t know what to do
    So I’ll leave it up to you

    And it’s somehow Bush’s fault.”

  17. Honoring those Latino citizens who made this country great by partaking in the traditional siesta!
  18. He lost a significant amount of sleep worrying over the results of Barrack’s AIDS test.
  19. The inside of Biden’s eyelids look just like the long, dark chasm that has been the Obama presidency.
  20. The anesthesia hadn’t completely worn off after an earlier trip to the hair clinic.
  21. His alien radio control implant was temporarily blocked by the lead paint in the rotunda.
  22. Late night panty raid in the Freshman dorm.
  23. He couldn’t get any coffee that morning because he didn’t have an Indian accent.
  24. Brainwashing Side Effects include: drowsiness, prolonged grinning, hair loss, and delusions of grandeur.
  25. Time for a nap – I’ve heard this all before from that peanut farmer guy … what the hell was his name? His brother made some great beer … where am I?

Contributors: Sven Waring, Perlcat, JJJRO

{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }

DMartyr April 14, 2011 at 6:42 am

Rated Awesome! What do you think? Thumb up 22 Thumb down 2

And I thought he was in training to become an air traffic controller…

hisham April 14, 2011 at 7:56 am

Rated Awesome! What do you think? Thumb up 8 Thumb down 1

Bwahahahahaha! Good one, D!

hisham April 14, 2011 at 8:02 am

Rated Awesome! What do you think? Thumb up 9 Thumb down 1

He’s getting his street cred for what I believe will be his next great adventure: Three Toed Sloth Trainer.

Elrond Hubbard April 14, 2011 at 9:43 am

Rated Awesome! What do you think? Thumb up 13 Thumb down 1

Falling asleep during Obama’s speech was a good response to that partisan piece of crap. The correct response was to stand up and walk out; it’s too bad Rep. Paul Ryan and the others were too polite to do it.

deepthinker April 15, 2011 at 8:11 am

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 1

Screw being polite when you are being lambasted by the biggest liar in US History, barry obama. The republicans better get some gonads a back bone and the stomach for getting down in the trenches and getting bloody on this one. If not barry will paint them as he did in this speech as mean spirited, uncaring and willing to slash and burn those that he can scare the most.

I want someone to stand up and tell it just the way it is not sit in the front row and act like their mouths are glued shut.

MJV in Wisconsin April 14, 2011 at 11:01 am

Controversial. What do you think? Thumb up 7 Thumb down 1

“7.He stayed up all night trying to figure out a good comeback for that smartass at the ice cream shop.”

It’s frozen custard, not ice cream!

Paden April 14, 2011 at 11:31 am

Rated Awesome! What do you think? Thumb up 9 Thumb down 1

Don’t wake him…let sleeping dogs lay.

copter1 April 16, 2011 at 5:01 pm

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 1

Or perhaps, let lying dogs sleep.

Paden April 14, 2011 at 1:04 pm

Rated Awesome! What do you think? Thumb up 10 Thumb down 1

Ya know…Joe sleeping is the most honest thing he’s done in office. ;)

Neo-7 April 14, 2011 at 3:37 pm

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 2

Alvin Lee and Ten Years After—- great song.

Buck O'Fama April 14, 2011 at 6:57 pm

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 1

Biden knows there ain’t anything worth plagarizing when Prez Snorbama gets to flappin’ his gums.

Ruben April 14, 2011 at 7:59 pm

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 1

Alright… there’s Sleepy. Now, where are the other six mental dwarfs?

Navyvet April 15, 2011 at 6:31 am

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 1

As you say there’s Joe Biden as Sleepy. The rest are: Dinglebarry as Dopey; Hillary as Bitchy; Eric Holder as Sleazy; Harry Reid as Whiny; Al Franken as Cheaty; Nancy Pelosi as Crazy. Of course, they are all interchangeable in the roles

john April 14, 2011 at 11:36 pm

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 1

He does his best work like that, eyes closed, mouth closed, brain waves——————————————————.

Big Al April 15, 2011 at 5:55 am

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 1

I am surprised that they didn’t blame it on Global warming.

RIP April 16, 2011 at 12:35 am

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 1

L.J.B. was asleep? How could you tell?

RockingHorseGuy April 16, 2011 at 4:53 pm

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 1

Somehow, I expect to be called a racist for not being impressed with Biden.