AntarcticSeaIce
Climate scientists decide expansion of Antarctic sea ice is caused by Global Warming. Modern science is easy. Causation is already decided for you – all weather is caused by Global Warming, everything biological is created by Evolution, hydrocarbons come from decayed vegetation, economic success kills Mother Earth, etc. – so to be a successful “scientist” all you need do is explain your data according to the appropriate scientific dogma using words small enough for journalists to understand. Voila! Nobel Prizes will be yours.

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28 Comments on "Climate scientists decide expansion of Antarctic sea ice is caused by Global Warming"

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sa_rose
Member

We have had a relatively warm winter here in SA. Of course, right now we are drying out from 24hrs of rain (thank you God!) and the current temp is 55 with a wind chill into the 30s. A couple of weeks ago we had a late freeze. So I don’t see much evidence of warming. Come July I may feel differently.

6 November 2012
Member

Basic double-think.

Ruben
Member

Halitosis: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Rancid potato chips: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
A surfer wiped out: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Stale bread: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Acute toe fungus: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Intensely cold North Dakota winters: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
A stock portfolio lost 8% of its value: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Obama hit 2 out of 50 shots today: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Gigli was a box office flop: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Argyle socks make people dizzy: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
I missed my 53 foot putt: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Eczema: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Male pattern baldness: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Warm summer evenings: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Doggonit! I only bowled a 97: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
I smashed my thumb with a hammer: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
The rice pilaf was mushy: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
That last fish got off the hook: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
Erectile dysfunction: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
A butterfly caught in a spider’s web: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
April showers: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
May flowers: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
June brides: caused by anthropogenic global warming.
My kid got a D- on his math test: caused by anthropogenic global warming.

There’s more but, hey, by now, you get the idea: according to its proponents, everything’s caused by anthropogenic global warming.

Navyvet2
Guest

Good list but you left off:
An erection lasting more than four hours: caused by AGW.

CO2Insanity
Admin

If you have an erection that last more than 4 hours call Al Gore.

poppajoe49
Member

That would surely make it go away!

RKae
Member

A butterfly trapped in a spider’s web?

That’s my soul up there.

poppajoe49
Member

Optional answer, Bush’s fault.

RKae
Member

Global warming is Bush’s fault. Bush’s presidency is due to global warming.

We have a liberal-logic closed-loop paradox!

jcrowley1985
Member

Nah, it’s Corporate Greed.

andre53
Member

And while they’re at it, did they also attribute the absence of global warming to global warming?

JPTravis
Member

That’ll be in the next IPCC report.

Navyvet2
Guest

More proof of global warming. In 1962 the Minnesota Twins home opener was 34 degrees. This year’s opener it was a sweltering 35 degrees. So There. Issue is settled.

JPTravis
Member

I’m not a baseball fan, but aren’t you playing the Tigers? The radio sports guys here were joking that the Tiger ace might throw a no-hitter because the Minnesota hitters will be too cold to swing their bats.

Navyvet2
Guest

The Tigers could have girly thrower Obama pitch as long as they put a Jason Verlander mask on him, or a Yankees uniform and the Twins will fold like an accordion.

CO2Insanity
Admin

They have electric underwear. No problem unless they pee their pants, then zap!

JPTravis
Member

You’re right. That’s 1 degree in fifty years and at least as scientific a sample as the climatologists use. Extrapolating out, that’s 2 degrees of warming in a century… shit, sounds good to me.

Progressive Hemrrhoid
Member
Progressive Hemrrhoid

For global warming I’ve sure spent a lot of money on heating my place this winter. Normally by this time of year it’s wouldn’t be 20 degrees below normal and still snowing.

JPTravis
Member

Just came back from the grocery store: it’s 30 degrees outside according to my car, and it’s snowing. On April 1. My golf league starts in two weeks and there’s still snow on the ground. Global Warming my blue frostbit ass.

Progressive Hemrrhoid
Member
Progressive Hemrrhoid

I rode past the local Golf Course this afternoon, the back nine looked like an outdoor scene from John Carpenter’s The Thing.

CO2Insanity
Admin

And I’m roasting and wishing I had a short-sleeve shirt on today. Must be a sure sign of global warming.

JPTravis
Member

Well step outside that sauna, man! Come outside!

BobontheJob
Member

Snow = GW; No snow = GW. Warm March = GW; cold March = GW. Ice shrinkage = GW; ice expansion = GW. It’s become beyond stupid for a couple of years now.

poppajoe49
Member

What’s the problem?
We all know that the hotter it gets, the more ice we will have.
Why is that so hard for you to understand?

/sarc

Big Al
Member

Make fun of the climate scientist if you dare but if that ice ever melts it will release a substantial amount of Dihydrogen Monoxide. That’s a fact Jack!

JPTravis
Member

I remember my high school chemistry teacher betting us he could drink a whole glass full of dihydrogen monoxide. He did, too.

Big Al
Member

I forced my teachers to move on to the hard stuff.

sifi
Member

It’s all lies that point to a political agenda and the liberal lapdog media eagerly lap it up and then regurgitates it to their politically illiterate litters. It’s all about blind votes guided by emotion.

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