Michael Moore says the Pope told him capitalism is a sin. The Pope gave the lying documentary maker a private audience, they held hands, discussed their communist inclinations, and then the Pope asked Michael Moore to pray for him… which is like asking a Kodiak bear to clean your salmon for you.
Michael Moore and Lawrence O’Donnell. Put ‘em together in front of a camera and the socialism just begins to spontaneously ooze. Or spurt. Or gush. Yeah, gush is a better word.
Michael Moore and Lawrence O’Donnell. Put ‘em together in front of a camera and the socialism just begins to spontaneously ooze. Or spurt. Or gush. Yeah, gush is a better word.
Here’s Michael Moore explaining how President Obama should use government control of General Motors to bring about a socialist workers green paradise:
The auto thing is a good example, too, where I wish Obama would just … if he would just ratchet it up another notch. Yes, you saved the jobs of all my friends back in Michigan but now that we sort of control the car companies let’s get them doing mass transit. Let’s get them doing things that are going to save this planet. Because the internal combustion engine is not going to get us to the twenty-second century. That’s just not gonna, we’re not gonna have a planet. That has to stop. And I just thought, jeez, when you have this power you can do things. And he’s just kinda like, “Nah, we’ll just get the money back from the auto companies and it’s all gonna be ok.”
Putting the questionable constitutionality of Moore’s dream aside, we have one question:
Do you really expect anyone to believe you have friends, Michael?
On the Joy Behar Show, Roseanne Barr told Michael Moore that she may run for president. No. Seriously. We kid you not.
You may wonder how Roseanne Barr, Michael Moore and Joy Behar all work their way into one story. Allow us to explain.
Roseanne Barr guest hosted Behar’s show on whatever network it’s on. Moore was a guest. Moore suggested that O’Donnell should run for office and she informed him that she intends to start at the top and run for President.
No. Seriously. We kid you not. Here’s how the conversation went:
Moore: Start supporting this. Barr: Start, yes, start being active. Right? Start being active. Moore: Yes, but not just going to demonstrations. You need to organize your neighbors, your churches, your schools and can I just say — Barr: Yes, but we’re running out of time. Moore: Can I just say this into your camera? Some of you need to run. You need to run for office. Barr: I’m running. That’s what I was going to ask in the next — Moore: You need to run. Barr: — in the next segment. I’m going to run for President of these United States. Moore: Wow. Barr: On behalf of the tax-paying people. Moore: Wow. Barr: I’m thinking about it, anyway. On this Red Bull.
Wow, indeed, Michael. (And quite an endorsement for Red Bull, we might add.)
Ain’t capitalism great? One minute you have a clever idea, the next minute you’re selling T-shirts. Oh, wait. “Capitalism: A Love Story” was the name of a Michael Moore movie.
Ain’t capitalism great? One minute you have a clever idea, the next minute you’re selling T-shirts.
Oh, wait. “Capitalism: A Love Story” was the name of a Michael Moore movie, wasn’t it? Yeah, now that we think about it, that makes it feel somehow inappropriate for that headline to accompany this photo of this T-shirt.
Can you hold on a minute while we come up with a new headline?
In the meantime, if you know who created this shirt, please let us know. We’d love to provide a link to the site and help the guy sell a few of these beauties.
“They’re sitting on the money,” Michael Moore said, “They’re using it for their own — they’re putting it someplace else with no interest in helping you with our life, with that money.
“They’re sitting on the money,” Moore said, “They’re using it for their own — they’re putting it someplace else with no interest in helping you with our life, with that money. We’ve allowed them to take that. That’s not theirs, that’s a national resource, that’s ours. We all have this, we all benefit from this or we all suffer as a result of not having it.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wzfd_sNw2-Y
Michael Moore is wasting his time making documentaries. He should really try his hand at comedies, because based on that economic theory, he’s the funniest man who’s ever lived.
“Take my money, please.”
“A rich man walks into a bar with a duck under his arm…”
“Slowly I turned progressive…”
“Is that a wad of cash in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”
“Lenin, Trotsky and Ronald Reagan are in a boat…”
Ahhh, you crack us up, Michael. Stop it, Michael. You’re killin’ us. Our sides ache from laughing.
But wait. It was reported last week that “On Feb. 7, Michael Moore filed papers claiming he was owed at least $2.7 million on 2004 doc ‘Fahrenheit 9/11.’” Considering his desire to confiscate wealth, we assume that he wants those millions only so he can donate them to the United States Treasury.
Being on Michael Moore’s email list is fun. A lot of fun, in fact. We get emails in which he rants and raves and comes up with all kinds of stupid leftist ideas. It’s a giant laughfest of leftist stupidity.
Being on Michael Moore’s email list is fun. A lot of fun, in fact. We get emails in which he rants and raves and comes up with all kinds of stupid leftist ideas. It’s a giant laughfest of leftist stupidity.
And now he’s come up with his dumbest idea yet. Let’s just let the fat filmmaker explain it in his own words:
From: Michael Moore
Date: Fri, Feb 18, 2011 at 1:56 PM
Subject: Join My High School Newspaper …a note to students from Michael Moore
To: The Administrator
Adults now ignore fat filmmaker Michael Moore, so he's going after children
Dear High School Students:
…We like to say that we have this great “free press,” and yet how free are high school newspapers? How free are you to write or blog about what you want? I’ve been sent stories from teenagers that they couldn’t get published at school. Why not? Why must we silence or keep out of sight the voice of our teenagers?
It’s not that way in other countries. The voting age in places like Austria, Brazil or Nicaragua is 16. In France, students can shut down the country by simply walking out of school and taking to the streets.But here in the U.S. you’re told to obey and to basically butt out and let the adults run the show.
Let’s change that! I’m starting something on my site called, “HIGH SCHOOL NEWSPAPER.” Here you will be able to write what you want and I will publish it. I will also post those articles that you’ve tried to get published at your school but were turned down. On my site you will have freedom and an open forum and a chance to have your voice heard by millions.
I’ve asked my 17-year-old niece, Molly, to kick things off by editing this page for the first six months. She will ask you to send her your stories and ideas and the best ones will be posted on MichaelMoore.com . I’ll give you the platform you deserve. It will be my honor to have you on my site and I encourage you to take advantage of it.
You are often called “our future.” That future is today, right here, right now. You’ve already proven you can change the world. Keep doing it. And I’d be honored to help you.
What are the odds that Moore will print any conservative articles?
How embarrassing is it to be outed as Michael Moore’s niece?
Would you want Michael Moore hanging out with your children?
If Michael Moore is going to begin hanging out around high schools, will Michelle Obama make him begin eating at one of her salad bars?
If the writers for Michael Moore’s high school newspaper wanted to unionize and demand salaries and healthcare benefits, would Moore embrace their efforts or fire them?
Fat filmmaker Michael Moore just ponied up $20,000 to help spring Wikileaks spokeshole Julian Assange from his English jail cell. Far as we can tell, the only thing keeping this story from being a perfect left wing trifecta is the absence of the Daily Kos.
Fat filmmaker Michael Moore just ponied up $20,000 to help spring Wikileaks spokeshole Julian Assange from his English jail cell. Far as we can tell, the only thing keeping this story from being a perfect left wing trifecta is the absence of the Daily Kos.
C'mon, admit it. You're not convinced that Michael Moore isn't really Sean Penn in a fat suit.
Oh, wait, we spoke too soon. Michael Moore just took to the pages of the Daily Kos to explain his actions:
Yesterday, in the Westminster Magistrates Court in London, the lawyers for WikiLeaks co-founder Julian Assange presented to the judge a document from me stating that I have put up $20,000 of my own money to help bail Mr. Assange out of jail.
Furthermore, I am publicly offering the assistance of my website, my servers, my domain names and anything else I can do to keep WikiLeaks alive and thriving as it continues its work to expose the crimes that were concocted in secret and carried out in our name and with our tax dollars.
We were taken to war in Iraq on a lie. Hundreds of thousands are now dead. Just imagine if the men who planned this war crime back in 2002 had had a WikiLeaks to deal with. They might not have been able to pull it off. The only reason they thought they could get away with it was because they had a guaranteed cloak of secrecy. That guarantee has now been ripped from them, and I hope they are never able to operate in secret again.
So why is WikiLeaks, after performing such an important public service, under such vicious attack? Because they have outed and embarrassed those who have covered up the truth. The assault on them has been over the top.
Now if only Hugo Chavez can be worked into this story somehow, our lives will be complete.
Conservatives have always wanted to see less of Michael Moore, but not this way. The round mound of sound and fury is trying to shed a few pounds. OK, more than a few. A lot more.
Conservatives have always wanted to see less of Michael Moore, but not this way. The round mound of sound and fury is trying to shed a few pounds. OK, more than a few. A lot more.
Michael Moore proves that black really doesn't make you look slimmer.
The Daily Caller has the dietary details:
The liberal filmmaker recently checked into a $4,500 a week luxury weight loss spa in Miami, a patron of the spa confirms.
Moore visited the Pritikin Longevity Center and Spa in mid-November. The resort’s campus features “650 acres of lush tropical gardens, fountains, water features and other amenities,” its website boasts.
Moore has visited Pritikin in past years and said he once lost 30 pounds by employing the center’s methods of eating “heavy foods.”
“I eat at least 35 grams of fiber every day. Eat foods that are heavy in weight but low in calories. I got this idea from Roger Ebert; he was the one who turned me on to the Pritikin Longevity Center in Florida. (Eating heavy foods) naturally creates the same thing as gastric bypass; it gives you a full feeling so you don’t want any more food,” Moore told the Chicago Tribune in 2007.
He lost 30 pounds once?
Good lord, Michael, you’re so fat that your tongue weighs 30 pounds. Your wattle weights 30 pounds. Your man boobs weigh 30 pounds. Each. If you ever got up off your fat ass you could lose 30 pounds just sweating. You should lose 30 pounds from the friction caused by your thighs rubbing together. And you’re dumb enough to tell people that you once lost 30 pounds?
No matter how much weight you lose, Michael, you’ll still be a fathead.
Michael Moore on Barack Obama: “Please take off the pink tutu, because it’s time to put on the boxing gloves and go fighting for the people.”
Michael Moore had a very productive session on Bill Maher’s Friday night HBO show. He more than filled his quota of absurd statements.
This one, for example, directed at President Obama:
“Please take off the pink tutu, because it’s time to put on the boxing gloves and go fighting for the people.”
Michael, Michael, Michael. You, as the master of irony that you are, should recognize the B. Hussein Obama story as a mere retelling of the tale of the scorpion and the fox.
You knew what he was when you elected him.
That tutu is part are parcel of who the man is and always will be. Vladimir Putin knows it. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad knows it. Hugo Chavez knows it. Kim Jong-Il knows it. Felipe Calderón knows it.
We say keep the tutu on. No one really wants to see what’s under it.
Michael Moore and CNN’s Jessica Yellin were guests on Friday’s “Real Time.” Of course, the fat fantasy filmmaker repeated his oft-heard claim that “white America does not like having a black president.”
Choosing to use the words “Michael Moore” and “facts of life” in the same sentence may have been an unfortunate mistake on our part. Seeing those words juxtaposed brings up horrible mental images that we were unprepared for when we typed them.
Nevertheless, Michael Moore and CNN’s Jessica Yellin were guests on Friday’s “Real Time.” Of course, the fat fantasy filmmaker repeated his oft-heard claim that “white America does not like having a black president.”
Believe it or not, Yellin schooled Moore on voter turnout during midterm elections and the fact that Obama’s approval ratings have nothing to do with race.
A variant of an obesity gene carried by more than a third of the U.S. population also reduces brain volume, raising carriers’ risk of Alzheimer’s disease.
Michael Moore explained! It's a miracle of modern medical science!
This may sound like a story from the Onion, but it’s not. It’s real. And it goes a long way toward explaining Michael Moore.
A variant of an obesity gene carried by more than a third of the U.S. population also reduces brain volume, raising carriers’ risk of Alzheimer’s disease, U.S. researchers said on Monday.
People with a specific variant of the fat mass and obesity gene, or FTO gene, have brain deficits that could make them more vulnerable to the mind-robbing disease.
“The basic result is that this very prevalent gene not only adds an inch to your waistline, but makes your brain look 16 years older,” said Paul Thompson, a professor of neurology at the University of California Los Angeles, who worked on the study published in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.
Bottom line: This discovery gives the term “fat head” a whole new meaning.
Michael Moore was kind enough to send us an email this morning. We thought we’d share with you his mocking, lecture, which he addressed to all republicans.
The fat and happy Michael Moore
Editor is traveling today, so the not-as-funny, f*cking pissed, Administrator is able to rant and rave here with no punch lines.
Michael Moore was kind enough to send us an email this morning. We thought we’d share with you his mocking, lecture, which he addressed to all republicans.
You better get used used to it. Now that Obamacare has passed, and the march to socialism is on, full speed ahead, from our Salinsky-trained, ridiculing president at the top, all the way down to slime like Michael Moore in the gutters of the far left, they are coming after you, with taunting derision now that their Chicago-style “do anything it takes” party of vermin has beaten us on this pivotal issue.
Fellow seekers of liberty: harness the outrage you feel from the volley of jeering attacks to come, out of the lying mouths of those we most despise, to sustain your anger, and channel it into every productive thing you can do to both repeal this bill and to remove the corrupt democrats and any irresolute republicans from office this November.
Sit down right now and write out a big check made out to IHateTheMedia.com. That would be the kindest way for you to repay us for watching Rachel Maddow. Especially on a night when her guest is Michael Moore.
Poor Michael is upset. Very upset. He sees the end of Camelot Part Duex coming in November:
Sit down right now and write out a big check made out to IHateTheMedia.com. That would be the kindest way for you to repay us for watching Rachel Maddow. Especially on a night when her guest is Michael Moore.
Poor Michael is upset. Very upset. He sees the end of Camelot Part Duex coming in November:
Well, we see what it’s led us to, to the fact that one out of eight homes now in America is in foreclosure or delinquency,” Moore said. “One out of eight home and, of course, the millions that don’t have health care and everything else it’s – how do you get yourself out of bed every morning to do this show with just the despair of how – the hope that we all had a year, year and a half ago. And now it’s like, I just feel like the Democrats are – they’re in for an ass-whooping of Biblical proportions in November if they don’t get off the dime and do the job they were sent there to do. I mean that. I mean, it – don’t they see that?
No, seriously, we deserve money for watching this stuff. Send your check today.
Is it just us or is this website starting to sound just like PBS?
Cenk Uygur, one of liberal radio and TV’s self-designated Young Turks, interviewed corpulent corporation buster Michael Moore. What could go wrong?
Cenk Uygur, one of liberal radio and TV’s self-designated Young Turks, interviewed corpulent corporation buster Michael Moore. What could go wrong?
Moore: You know, I tell you, these Democrats are disgusting. Wimps and wusses and weasels. You know, get some spine. This is why I have to admire the Republicans. They at least stand for something. They at least have the courage of their convictions. They get elected to office, they come into town, and they go “Get outta my way, there’s a new sheriff in town. This is the way we’re doing things. Get outta here.” And then they do it. You know. I mean what they do is crazy. But dammit, they are good at it. We should take a page out of their book.
It was almost as if Moore realized he had bitten the hand that feeds him, so he quickly took a shot at conservative Glenn Beck.
Cenk: I couldn’t agree more with that. So to finish that thought, if you were, for example, Van Jones, how would you have responded to Glenn Beck?
Moore: Fuck off! That’s what I would have said. But again, you mentioned Glenn Beck, and of course, he’s the guy that’s called for my removal from the planet Earth.
Whew! That’s more like it, Michael. We were worried about you there for a second.
Moore’s most recent effort, Capitalism: A Love Story, took aim at businesses that used shelters to avoid paying taxes and took government bailouts during the market crash. The thing is, Moore used similar tactics,
In George Orwell’s Animal Farm, all pigs are equal, but some pigs are more equal than others.
In the case of Michael Moore, some slobs are more equal than other slobs.
Moore’s most recent effort, Capitalism: A Love Story, took aim at businesses that used shelters to avoid paying taxes and took government bailouts during the market crash.
The thing is, Moore used similar tactics, taking advantage of a Michigan tax break to fund the making of his film–which raked in millions, by the way. Michigan taxpayers–already hit hard with the collapsing auto industry–were left holding the funny money bag for that one.
Maybe the taxpayers should pull together for the sequel, Socialism, a Fraud Story.
When a thoroughbred racehorse breaks a leg on the track, they rush out and quickly put the poor beast out its misery with a bullet to the head. Anyone have a spare round for Michael Moore’s “Capitalism?”
When a thoroughbred racehorse breaks a leg on the track, they rush out and quickly put the poor beast out its misery with a bullet to the head. Anyone have a spare round for Michael Moore’s “Capitalism?”
This weekend’s results are in. Capitalism’s total box office receipts were a sad, sad $703,000. It’s total box office is a paltry $12,937,000 after five weeks of release. Five films brought in more than that this week alone.
Capitalism’s vital signs are extremely weak. Friends and family are gathered at its bedside. No heroic measures will be taken to keep it alive. Say your goodbyes. Bring in the priest and give the last rites. Order a casket and a hearse. Schedule a day at the cemetery.
And then pause and laugh your ass off at that fat bastard Michael Moore.
Michael Moore may hate capitalism, but he’s learned a valuable lesson by making Capitalism. That is, you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.
Hey, Michael, how’s the box office for your latest movie?
Michael Moore may hate capitalism, but he’s learned a valuable lesson by making Capitalism. That is, you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink. Or its Hollywood corollary, you can lead a whore to water, but you can’t make her drink. But we digress.
What Moore has learned is that no one wants to see a film that calls for the destruction of a system that made it possible for that film to be made.
The total box office for “Capitalism” dropped 39% this weekend despite playing in an additional 33 theaters. This weekend’s total box office was a mere $2,700,000 and the total two week take is just $9,095,000.
Think about it this way: At $10 per ticket, that means only 270,000 people saw “Capitalism” this weekend. That works out to 271 people per theater. Figure three showings per day Friday, Saturday and Sunday, that means a sad, sad average of 30 people paid to see each showing of Capitalism.
Of course, this is Hollywood. So a documentary that’s full of lies and distortions that no one want to see, well, that’s surefire Oscar material.
We regret being the bearers of bad news. Michael Moore’s latest “documentary” died a quick, but painful death this weekend. Virtually no one was with it when it expired.
We regret being the bearers of bad news. Michael Moore’s latest “documentary” died a quick, but painful death this weekend. Virtually no one was with it when it expired.
Total box office take for Capitalism’s opening Friday, Saturday and Sunday was a mere $4,850,000. That puts it in seventh place for the weekend, nestled between a movie called “Whip It” in sixth place and the latest remake of “Fame” in eighth. It was the fat filmmaker’s worst opening since 2002’s Bowling for Columbine.
By way of comparison, a comedy-horror film called “Zombieland” ended up in the top position with $25,000,000.
One of the beauties of capitalism (with a lower case “c”) is that people have the right to reject Capitalism (with a capital “C”). And they did.
Director and “Biggest Loser” candidate Michael Moore is awfully damn happy with himself over his latest movie. Moore said “Having spent the last year and a half living pretty much under the radar and quietly putting together this movie for you, it is heartening, to say the least, to read the early reviews where Time Magazine called it ‘Moore’s magnum opus’
Michael Moore has a big opening. His film didn't have such a big opening.
Director and “Biggest Loser” candidate Michael Moore is awfully damn happy with himself over his latest movie.
Writing in Huffington Post, Moore said “Having spent the last year and a half living pretty much under the radar and quietly putting together this movie for you, it is heartening, to say the least, to read the early reviews where Time Magazine called it ‘Moore’s magnum opus,’ the Los Angeles Times has declared it my ‘most controversial film yet,’ and Variety has said that Capitalism: A Love Story is ‘one of Moore’s best films.’ Wow. Honestly, I didn’t know what to expect, considering this film is an all-out assault against the racket polite people like to call ‘Wall Street.'”
Let’s see. Since Moore’s remarks that “Capitalism is both un-Christian and un-American, an evil that deserves not regulation but elimination,” we can kind of guess where this movie is going.
The Independent Eye, a blog committed to independent film review bemoans the fact that there are no conservative reviews of the film. We can’t understand why conservatives are not flocking to see it either, but we think it may have something to do with the fact that Moore is a fat idiot and his movies blow chunks.
Using his typical 1/4 truth documentary style, Moore again focuses on the misery of some to make his point (and his profits).
Now if he could just spare us the misery of another Michael Moore movie.
Michael Moore was promoting his vile new so-called documentary, “Capitalism: A Love Story,” at the Venice Film Festival. “Moore admitted that he felt vindicated that George Bush had finally gone. ‘The American people are now thinking more like me,’ he said.”
The Rotund One was promoting his vile new so-called documentary, “Capitalism: A Love Story,” at the Venice Film Festival.
“Moore admitted that he felt vindicated that George Bush had finally gone. ‘The American people are now thinking more like me,’ he said.”
We hate to be the bearers of bad news, Michael, but the American people didn’t oust George Bush. The 22nd Amendment did.
Alternate energy: Power the homes of several average American families for a year with the fat sucked out of Michael Moore's wattle.
For some reason, we’re on corpulent corporate bashing Michael Moore’s email list.
Yesterday we got an email from our pal Mike that proved he’s as good an economist as he is a film maker.
He presents a 9-point plan to revitalize America. It involves mass construction projects including bullet trains, light rail systems, fleets of electric cars, windmills and solar panels, and hybrid cars and busses.
But how, you may ask, can we possibly afford all this? Well, Michael has the answer to that, too.
“To help pay for this, impose a two-dollar tax on every gallon of gasoline. This will get people to switch to more energy saving cars or to use the new rail lines and rail cars the former autoworkers have built for them.”
Yes, $2 per gallon. Overnight. Bang. The price goes up more than 50% overnight.
We have a better idea. Enforced liposuction on all obese film makers. Burn it like they used to burn whale oil back in the 1800s. We’d cut our foreign energy dependence overnight.
The Associated Press makes it pretty clear where they come down politically. In fact, they couldn’t disguise it if they tried.
Take Saturday’s AP story on Detroit, for example. They asked three homegrown Detroit celebrities – Michael Moore, Ted Nugent, and Mary Wilson – about the city’s troubles.
They lead off with liberal fantasy moviemaker Moore, giving him seven paragraphs and 204 words. Yet conservative Motor City Madman Nugent merits only two paragraphs and 96 words (previous article). Even politically unannounced former Supreme Wilson tops that with four paragraphs and 104 words. The story even allowed Moore a chance to promote his new “documentary,” but mentioned no current or future projects from Nugent nor Wilson.
We’d like to propose a debate between the Moore and Nugent. A ten round debate. Mary Wilson can be the ring girl. Sell tickets. Bingo. Detroit’s financial problems are solved.
Fat filmmaker Michael Moore is looking for whistleblowers of the Wall Street variety. Check the following message on corpulent corporation basher’s website: "L" is for Loser
Friends,
I am in the middle of shooting my next movie and I am looking for a few brave people who work on Wall Street or in the financial industry to come forward and share with me what they know. Based on those who have already contacted me, I believe there are a number of you who know “the real deal” about the abuses that have been happening. You have information that the American people need to hear. I am humbly asking you for a moment of courage, to be a hero and help me expose the biggest swindle in American history.
All correspondence with me will be kept confidential. Your identity will be protected and you will decide to what extent you wish to participate in telling the greatest crime story ever told.
We’d like to blow the whistle on the shenanigans going on here at IHateTheMedia.com, Michael, but we fear retribution by the evil mega-conglomerate that owns this website. They are vicious, scum-sucking weasels.
When a thoroughbred racehorse breaks a leg on the track, they rush out and quickly put the poor beast out its misery with a bullet to the head. Anyone have a spare round for Michael Moore’s “Capitalism?”
The Rotund One was promoting his vile new so-called documentary, “Capitalism: A Love Story,” at the Venice Film Festival.
The Associated Press makes it pretty clear where they come down politically. In fact, they couldn’t disguise it if they tried.
