A reporter asks Press Secretary Robert Gibbs why his boss is taking Arizona to court on dubious constitutional grounds while ignoring sanctuary cities that are obviously violating federal law. Gibbs answers by not answering. What a schmuck.
A reporter asks Press Secretary Robert Gibbs why his boss is taking Arizona to court on dubious constitutional grounds while ignoring sanctuary cities that are obviously violating federal law.
We uncovered some documents wrapped around three day old sushi and purported to be Democratic talking points suitable for town halls meetings and campaign appearances.
While cleaning out some dumpsters hoping to find the rumored Al Franken doodles of Elena Kagan naked, we instead uncovered some documents wrapped around three day old sushi and purported to be Democratic talking points suitable for town halls meetings and campaign appearances.
Nancy Pelosi, the best darn friend a campaigning Democrat ever had
If questioned, we are sure the DNC would deny all knowledge or blame it on either George Bush or global warming, so we didn’t bother to ask. So here it is:
If someone at your town hall meeting starts to talk about lower taxes – RIDICULE HIM/HER immediately. Call them names like smart ass. If they persist, toss in “un-American” or “astro turf” and, of course, the biggie, scream “raaaaacism”.
When questioned about job numbers, it can become quite tricky to counter your constituent, especially if he or she is armed with pesky facts that you, unfortunately, cannot disprove, most likely because facts are, after all, facts. In this case, resort to the unexpected to throw your opponents off balance. Say something like, “Is it just me or do Sarah Palin’s breasts look unnaturally large?” Sometimes distraction is almost as good as winning.
Onward to glorious victory. Supreme Leader Barack Obama knows a frown is just a smile turned upside own
Should someone at your town hall bring up the Blago corruption trial and the glorious leader’s president’s involvement, go on the offensive. Make fun of Boehner’s tan by calling him a “person of color”. Not only is this distracting, it’s downright hilarious!
If someone mentions unemployment numbers, remind them it could be worse – 30%, 50% or even 100%. They could be a living in a communist nation and no one would get paid. Ummm, on second thought, don’t say that.
If a Republican or, God forbid, a Tea Party member should sneak into your Town Hall past your Union provided security personnel and they dare to ask about the oil spill, remind them that it is George Bush’s fault. Then question their patriotism for questioning the Great and Powerful Obama. Since no one knows exactly how the oil spill started, accuse them of begin responsible. Who knows? Maybe your accusations can gain some traction.
Should someone bring up the old news about Sestak or Romanoff being offered jobs for dropping out of their campaigns, look at them with utter disgust and disdain. You may wish to watch clips of Robert Gibbs to get the look down just right. Then say something like, “Are you honestly accusing this great man, the most intellectual and sexiest president of all time, of stooping so low?” Then sneer and say, “How could you? I’m not even going to dignify that question with a response.”
If your state borders Mexico – unlike Arizona – and someone questions border security in your state, jump up on your chair as if you have seen a large rat and yell, “Racist, racist, racist” while pointing at the offender. Don’t fall into the trap of letting a constituent ask if you’ve actually read the 20-page Arizona bill. This sort of bill is often both complicated and arcane and can be terribly confusing. Just assure your audience that the bill is racist and encourages profiling.
We are sure that we have left out some scandal problem that may give rise to a question or two, but if all else fails use the Nancy Pelosi defense. Talk about God’s will and tell everyone how great unemployment is.
First Saudi Arabia hinted that it would let Israel use the Kingdom’s airspace if and when it decides to take out Iran’s nuke facilities. Now the United Arab Emirates’ ambassador to the United States has made it pretty clear that his nation wouldn’t object to an air strike or two, either.
Emirates ambassador whispers, "Psst. Hey, Israel. Go ahead and bomb Iran."
First Saudi Arabia hinted that it would let Israel use the Kingdom’s airspace if and when it decides to take out Iran’s nuke facilities. Now the United Arab Emirates’ ambassador to the United States has made it pretty clear that his nation wouldn’t object to an air strike or two, either.
The Jerusalem Post has the anti-Iranian information:
The United Arab Emirates ambassador to the United States said Tuesday that it would be worthwhile to bomb Iran’s nuclear program, The Washington Times reported.
Ambassador Yousef al-Otaiba reportedly endorsed the military option if sanctions do not stop Iran from obtaining nuclear weapons.
“I think it’s a cost-benefit analysis,” Otaiba said to an audience in Aspen, Colorado. “I think despite the large amount of trade we do with Iran, which is close to $12 billion … there will be consequences, there will be a backlash and there will be problems with people protesting and rioting and very unhappy that there is an outside force attacking a Muslim country; that is going to happen no matter what.”
“If you are asking me, ‘Am I willing to live with that versus living with a nuclear Iran?,’ my answer is still the same: ‘We cannot live with a nuclear Iran.’ I am willing to absorb what takes place at the expense of the security of the UAE,” Otaiba reportedly said, in response to a question after a public interview with the Atlantic magazine. His remarks shocked many in the audience, The Washington Times reported.
We know a beautiful Chinese woman who tells the story that her elderly grandmother once advised her, “You should marry a Chinese man. But if you can’t marry a Chinese man, marry a white man. But if you can’t marry a white man, marry a Japanese man. But whatever you do, don’t marry a Korean man.”
Looks like the Iranians have officially become the Koreans of the Middle East.
(Hey, don’t blame us for this story. Blame our friend’s elderly grandmother. Old ladies can get away with saying crap like that.)
It’s almost reassuring in a sick sort of way to see that President Obama blames his international woes on others just as consistently as he blames his domestic woes on others. It’s never this guy’s fault.
Barack Hussein Obama is about as popular as a ham sandwich in Haifa
It’s almost reassuring in a sick sort of way to see that President Obama blames his international woes on others just as consistently as he blames his domestic woes on others. It’s never this guy’s fault. It’s always the fault of those morons who aren’t smart enough to realize that he is The Greatest President In History.
Haaretz.com explains the latest example:
U.S. President Barack Obama told Channel 2 News on Wednesday that he believed Israel would not try to surprise the U.S. with a unilateral attack on Iran.
During the interview Wednesday, when confronted with the anxiety that some Israelis feel toward him, Obama said that “some of it may just be the fact that my middle name is Hussein, and that creates suspicion.”
“I think that sometimes, particularly in the Middle East, there’s the feeling of the friend of my enemy must be my enemy, and the truth of the matter is that my outreach to the Muslim community is designed precisely to reduce the antagonism and the dangers posed by a hostile Muslim world to Israel and to the West.”
Here’s a little unsolicited tip from IHateTheMedia.com, Mr. President:
It’s not your middle name. It’s that you side with Israel’s enemies first, last and always.
We ran an ad in the Montecito Journal, Al’s new hometown newspaper, welcoming the Goracle to the neighborhood. We did it because we’re warmhearted, caring people. So why are we getting all these angry emails?
When we heard Al Gore was moving into a new beachside Montecito mansion just a couple hours down the road from IHateTheMedia.com’s international headquarters, we did the neighborly thing and tried to deliver a welcome basket filled with central coast wines. Unfortunately, the security guards weren’t as neighborly as we were.
So we did the next best thing and ran an ad in the Montecito Journal, Al’s new hometown newspaper, welcoming the Goracle to the neighborhood.
We did it because we’re warmhearted, caring people.
So why are we getting all these angry emails?
(Click image for full-size version. You may download and use in your blog)
Turns out you can’t tweet about your respect for a Hezbollah honocho even at left wing cable networks. Well, not at CNN at least. The same tweet would probably get you a promotion at MSNBC.
Very sad news from CNN. Octavia Nasr, the network’s Senior Editor for Middle East Affairs, is now the network’s former Senior Editor for Middle East Affairs.
Turns out you can’t tweet about your respect for a Hezbollah honocho even at left wing cable networks. Well, not at CNN at least. The same tweet would probably get you a promotion at MSNBC.
The crazy old left wing hunters want nothing more than to destroy Rush Limbaugh’s career by catching him uttering racist words so offensive that they can be used to turn public opinion against the talk show host.
You know that old movie about the aging big game hunter who’s spent years stalking one particular lion, but has never managed to bring the magnificent beast down? There’s nothing he wants more than that lion’s head hanging on his wall. It’s become a personal battle and the hunter’s failure has made him bitter, angry, and obsessed.
In this case, think of Media Matters as the hunter and Rush Limbaugh as the lion.
The crazy old left wing hunters want nothing more than to destroy Rush Limbaugh’s career by catching him uttering racist words so offensive that they can be used to turn public opinion against the talk show host.
So Media Matters waits, hiding in the bushes, waiting for Limbaugh to expose himself so they can get a clear shot. So far, they’ve missed every time.
Cute Little Katie Couric barely managed to avoid sneering at the Prime Minister of Israel as she bemoaned the lack of ObamaLove in the Holy Land.
ObamaLove is contagious! Catch it now, Israel!
What would a news show be without the host expressing her disappointment with an allied nation’s opinion of the Most Lovable President Ever? Okay, it doesn’t happen that often, because most of the mainstream media refuse to give air time to anyone who does not love themself some Obama.
But then there’s Cute Little Katie Couric, who barely managed to avoid sneering at the Prime Minister of Israel as she bemoaned the lack of ObamaLove in the Holy Land.
Couric: Can you explain this to me then? In a poll conducted a month ago, just a month ago, 71 percent of the Jews in Israel surveyed said they dislike President Obama – 47 percent expressed a strong dislike.
Netanyahu: Well, maybe they don’t have the opportunity to have the kind of conversations that I had. And maybe they’re not aware also the ongoing cooperation between Israel and the United States. In the fields of security, intelligence – the fact that-the Iron dome program to protect against missiles is something that has been bolstered by this administration and by this president. We have a common goal to achieve a secure peace. I’m looking forward to working with him to achieve it.
Couric: Well, to change public opinion in your country, should you be more strongly advocating on his behalf?
Oh, Katie, Katie, Katie. Pimping for Obama is hardly a Prime Minister’s job. But it is, apparently, a news anchor’s job.
Turns out the guy doesn’t like President Obama any more than he liked President Bush when he became the darling of the liberal media by tossing a shoe at the former president.
Last year, Muntazer Al-Zaidi was liberal icon. This year, he’s a foul Iraqi raaaaacist.
Turns out the guy doesn’t like President Obama any more than he liked President Bush when he became the darling of the liberal media by tossing a shoe at the former president.
Note this quote from an Al-Zaidi interview on MEMRI TV:
Muntazer Al-Zaidi: With regard to Bush’s bloodthirsty nature, several foreign journalists asked me, after the earthquake in Haiti, about the fact that Bush had gone there as if he was a “peace activist.” I said: Believe me, Bush did not go there for the sake of human rights or for the victims. He went there because he missed the smell of blood, and the stench of destruction that he wreaked on Iraq. So he went there to get a whiff of that smell, because he is a sick man.
Interviewer: In your view, Obama is not very different from Bush, even if he wraps the actions of the US in false humanitarian wrapping.
Muntazer Al-Zaidi: We have a saying in Iraqi Arabic – and I’m sure the Egyptian brothers living in Iraq know it. “Away goes a white dog, and along comes a black dog.” They are the same, except for the color. Away goes a white US president, and along comes a black president. They are no different.
And as the American voters are beginning to learn, that old saying is true:
Every day’s a bad hair day for Barbara Boxer, but Thursday was also a bad poll day for the embattled California Democrat.
Every day’s a bad hair day for Barbara Boxer, but Thursday was also a bad poll day for the embattled California Democrat.
Reuters reports the remarkable turnaround for Republican candidate Carly Fiorina:
Democratic Senator Barbara Boxer’s edge over Republican challenger Carly Fiorina has dwindled to 3 points as she seeks re-election in November, with more Californians now holding an unfavorable view of the three-term senator, a poll released on Thursday showed.
Boxer, who once held a 30-point lead over Fiorina, the former CEO of Hewlett Packard and a political novice, is now ahead by a margin of only 47 percent to 44 percent, the Field Poll found.
What’s even more surprising is that Fiorina has moved up so quickly while still remaining relatively unknown to California voters. Of course, we may be looking at that from the wrong perspective, because it may well be that Boxer has moved down because she isn’t unknown to the voters.
Remarkably, the brilliant Ms. Boxer decided to launch her campaign with a speech touting job creation in a state with a 12.4% unemployment rate, third highest in the nation.
Her days of telling people to call her “Senator” may be numbered.
Noted black radical bonehead Malik Zulu Shabazz went on Russian television to complain about Fox News. Couldn’t he have saved a lot of time and trouble by just going on MSNBC?
Noted black radical bonehead Malik Zulu Shabazz went on Russian television to complain about Fox News. Couldn’t he have saved a lot of time and trouble by just going on MSNBC?
Shabazz said Fox is not only trying to stir up racial fears, but lying to the American people. And he was just getting warmed up.
Shabazz also categorized Fox viewers as “whites” and “Confederates”. When whites say they want to “take their country back,” he continued, “we interpret that as meaning take our country back from this black man”.
And then, just to put a little icing on the controversial cake, he told “right wingers” and the tea-party that “We’re ready to rumble.”
Sorry, but it’s just a little tough for us to take a guy seriously when his name is Zulu Shabazz.
Rachel Maddow, MSNBC hostess extraordinaire, has taken her road show to Kandahar, Afghanistan for a little of her special brand of impartial reporting.
Rachel Maddow, MSNBC hostess extraordinaire, has taken her road show to Kandahar, Afghanistan for a little of her special brand of impartial reporting.
Far be it from us to cast aspersions, but good lord, man, faces like that are the reason they invented the burkha.
(Please note the remarkable maturity we’ve shown by not falling victim to our baser instincts and using the term Fagahnistan.)
After an uproar from conservative bloggers and free-speech activists, the Transportation Security Administration late Tuesday rescinded a new policy that would have prevented employees from accessing websites with “controversial opinions” on TSA computers at work.
The ban on “controversial opinion” sites, issued late last week, was included as part of a more general TSA Internet-usage policy blocking employee access to gambling and chat sites, as well as sites that dealt with extreme violence or criminal activity.
But the policy itself became controversial as the Drudge Report and a number of conservative bloggers highlighted the possibility that the policy could be used to censor websites critical of the agency or of the Obama administration in general. The American Civil Liberties Union also questioned the language.
TSA spokeswoman Lauren Gaches said the agency’s revised “acceptable use” policy for Internet access on the agency’s network was designed to block sites “that promote destructive behavior to one’s self or others.” ”
After further review, TSA determined the ‘controversial opinion’ category may contain some sites that do not violate TSA’s policy and therefore has concluded that the category is no longer being considered for implementation,” she said in an e-mail to The Washington Times.
Bad week at IHateTheMedia.com. We can’t get a fatwa issued against us for insulting Islam. We can’t get Napolitano to name us as banned controversial site. We can’t get Lindsay Lohan to return our phone calls.
How’s a website supposed to get a little publicity?
From her safe, secure, ultra-liberal bunker in San Francisco, out of touch Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi has issued suicide marching orders for her Democrat house minions.
Princess Pelosi of San Franciscostan seems to be a bit out of touch with her people
From her safe, secure, ultra-liberal bunker in San Francisco, out of touch Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi has issued suicide marching orders for her Democrat house minions:
Hold town hall meetings and tell your constituents how proud you are of your vote for ObamaCare.
The Hill ruminates on Pelosi’s political hallucinations:
Speaker Nancy Pelosi is doubling down on healthcare reform, betting that it will do Democrats more good than harm in November’s elections.
She and her leadership team have seized on new polls that suggest healthcare overhaul’s popularity is rising, and they are urging members of Congress to use this week’s recess to tout the new law.
Pelosi (D-Calif.) and the party leadership have sent lawmakers back to their districts urging them to hold town hall-type meetings to highlight the law’s benefits, in the belief it could help Democrats avoid major losses in November.
Recent polls indicate a slow but steady uptick in the popularity of healthcare reform. Despite Republican hopes that the law’s controversial passage will win them seats this fall, the Democrats’ actions show they still consider the issue a political winner.
One can only assume that Pelosi and the rest of the House leadeship missed the latest Rasmussen study that shows 60% of likely voters want ObamaCare repealed.
But The Pelosi is The Pelosi and her world view extends no further than the Bay Bridge – the one she’s urging fellow Democrats to jump from.
If nothing else, this should make for some good video clips.
This is going to come as a terrible shock to Al Gore and his band of Gorebots, but that IPCC report – you know, the one that foretold all the horrible consequences of global warming – was mostly hot air.
The polar bears are going to be fine, but global warming scaremongers may face extinction.
This is going to come as a terrible shock to Al Gore and his band of Gorebots, but that IPCC report – you know, the one that foretold all the horrible consequences of global warming – was mostly hot air.
The Australian, one of the largest newspapers in the land down under, reports on chicanery within the IPCC:
THE UN body that advises governments on climate change failed to make clear how its landmark report on the impact of global warming often presented a worst-case scenario, an investigation has concluded.
A summary report by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change on regional impacts focused on the negative consequences of climate change and failed to make clear that there would also be some benefits of rising temperatures.
The report adopted a “one-sided” approach that risked being interpreted as an “alarmist view”.
For example, the IPCC had stated that 60 per cent of the Great Barrier Reef was projected to suffer regular bleaching by 2020 but had failed to make clear that this was the worst projected outcome and the impact might be far smaller.
The wording of a statement on between 3000 and 5000 more heat-related deaths a year in Australian cities had suggested that all of the projected increase would be the result of climate change, whereas most of it would be caused by the rising population and an increase in the number of elderly people.
The report, which underpinned the Copenhagen summit last December, wrongly suggested that climate change was the main reason communities faced severe water shortages and neglected to make clear that population growth was a much bigger factor.
Have at it, global warming lunatics. Remind us again how your cause is just and how you’re doing it for the children.
Remember those independents who elected President Obama? The ones who had supposedly joined with the Democrats to create an enduring new majority? Say bye-bye, Barack.
Remember those independents who elected President Obama? The ones who had supposedly joined with the Democrats to create an enduring new majority? Say bye-bye, Barack.
Gallup has the news of the independents’ new found independence:
Thirty-eight percent of independents approve of the job Barack Obama is doing as president, the first time independent approval of Obama has dropped below 40% in a Gallup Daily tracking weekly aggregate. Meanwhile, Obama maintains the support of 81% of Democrats, and his job approval among Republicans remains low, at 12%.
Over the past year, Obama has lost support among all party groups, though the decline has been steeper among independents than among Republicans or Democrats. Today’s 38% approval rating among independents is 18 percentage points lower than the 56% found July 6-12, 2009. During the same period, his support has fallen nine points among Democrats (from 90% to 81%) and eight points among Republicans (from 20% to 12%).
At the rate this guy is going, even Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid will vote Republican in November.
Barack Obama was elected as America’s first black president, but has already transformed himself into America’s first black gold president.
Barack Obama was elected as America’s first black president, but has already transformed himself into America’s first black gold president. George Bush may have been an oil man, but we doubt that any president will ever be more identified with oil than the current occupant of the Oval Office.
By the way, President Obama, how’s that laser-like focus on the oil spill working out for you?
She looks homeless. She sounds brainless. She’s that one and only leftwing lunatic, Janeane Garofalo, guest starring in Night of the Living Braindead.
She looks homeless. She sounds brainless. She’s that one and only leftwing lunatic, Janeane Garofalo, guest starring in Night of the Living Braindead.
In tonight’s episode, Janeane introduces a new word to the English language: depilitorizing.
We graduated from a major liberal west coast university, which means we have an 8th grade vocabulary, so we know a lot of words most people haven’t mastered. We have seven, maybe eight hundred words in our rather extensive vocabularies.
In case you didn’t know, depilitorizing is the act of removing hair from your demilitarized zone. For example, “When I was stationed in Seoul, I got depilitorized. They called it a Korean Brazilian.”
We’re not sure why Garofalo brought up her debilitorized zone in the middle of this conversation.
Oh, and by the way, conservatives control the media.
On one hand, Congressional candidate Paul R. Nelson has produced a political commercial that brilliantly positions his opponent. On the other hand, it’s exactly the wrong kind of commercial.
On one hand, Congressional candidate Paul R. Nelson has produced a political commercial that brilliantly positions his opponent. On the other hand, it’s exactly the wrong kind of commercial.
The only way to figure out the meaning of that cryptic statement is to watch the commercial for yourself.
Hint: Nelson has turned his opponent’s name into a huge liability.
Can you imagine the din that would have arisen if Bush Director of Homeland Security Michael Chertoff had issued an order banning “controversial websites”?
Can you imagine the din that would have arisen if Bush Director of Homeland Security Michael Chertoff had issued an order banning “controversial websites”?
Yet that’s exactly what happened when Director of Homeland Security Janet Napolitano issued new censorship rules late on Friday afternoon, hoping her edict would slip through unnoticed over the long holiday weekend. Looks like that ploy didn’t work, Jan.
CBS News risks being banned, we assume, by reporting the news:
We're waiting for the ACLU to file suit against Janet Napolitano. Still waiting.
The Transportation Security Administration (TSA) is blocking certain websites from the federal agency’s computers, including halting access by staffers to any Internet pages that contain a “controversial opinion,” according to an internal email obtained by CBS News.
The email was sent to all TSA employees from the Office of Information Technology on Friday afternoon.
It states that as of July 1, TSA employees will no longer be allowed to access five categories of websites that have been deemed “inappropriate for government access.”
If your first guess was that the Ethic’s Czar chair is vacant because The Most Ethical Administration in History has no ethics violations, you should immediately tell your doctor that you need your medication increased.
Ethics Czar Norm Eisen has been like Sgt. Schultz. He sees nothiiiiing.
If your first guess was that the Ethic’s Czar chair is vacant because The Most Ethical Administration in History has no ethics violations, you should immediately tell your doctor that you need your medication increased. Delusions that severe can have long lasting effects.
The Huffington Post reports:
President Obama has nominated his “ethics czar” as ambassador to the Czech Republic, the White House announced on Monday. The White House won’t say whether it plans to replace him.
The story continues:
Eisen’s first act as special counsel to the president for ethics and government reform was to gather up Obama’s campaign promises about battling special interests in Washington and to bundle them into an executive order banning lobbyists from serving in the administration, which Obama signed on his first day in office.
Apparently the Huffington Post’s website does not command enough bandwidth to add the fact that Obama violated this Executive Order less than a day after signing it by hiring former lobbyist William J. Lynn III as his Deputy Defense Secretary which, if we’re not mistaken, establishes a new record for presidential promise breaking.
Nevertheless, the article’s unabated hilarity continues:
Under Norm Eisen’s leadership, the Administration has had a remarkable first year making our government more accessible and accountable, including reducing special interest influence in Washington,” said a White House official. “Among other accomplishments, as government watch-dog groups have recognized, the President’s revolving door lobbying ban for officials leaving government is ‘the most-far reaching ever adopted’; the President’s ‘reverse’ revolving door rules for officials entering government are the ‘first-ever’ and ‘innovative’; and the President’s open government initiatives are ‘unprecedented’ and ‘go well beyond any efforts undertaken by previous administrations.’
Well, yes, they are the “most-far reaching” damn rules ever. The problem is that the whole Executive Order is basically a joke that is violated almost daily in the Obama White House via a liberal use of waivers. The White House is in fact so darn friendly to lobbyists that we are surprised the Vice-President isn’t a lobbyist. But at least his son is.
So it’s not the empty Ethics Czar Chair that’s a problem. It’s the empty ethics promises.
The federal government has spent $550,496 on a project that involved conducting “focus groups and in-depth interviews” with American long-haul truck drivers to learn about their sex lives.
Truck drivers aren't just filling their tanks at those roadside truck stops
The federal government has spent $550,496 on a project that involved conducting “focus groups and in-depth interviews” with American long-haul truck drivers to learn about their sex lives in order to assess their risk of contracting HIV or other sexually transmitted infections.
The project has failed to find any instances of HIV among the truck drivers studied.
The government may have worded some of the questions a bit too formally. We would suggest that they would get more honest answers in the future if they simply rephrase the questions by using terminology with which the truck drivers can identify. For example:
Question #1: Have you ever hooked your big rig up to a strange trailer Question #3: Have you ever been rear-ended at a truckstop? Question #7: Have you ever made a long haul delivery down the chocolate highway? Question #12: Have you ever gone the wrong way up a one-way street?
We saw this clip and thought, “Hmmmm. Congressman Lewis sounds familiar.” Then it hit us – he sounds just like Cleveland Brown, the animated character that originated on Family Guy and has now moved on to his own show. Same tone, same cadence, same emphatic delivery.
We saw this clip and thought, “Hmmmm. Congressman Lewis sounds familiar.” Then it hit us – he sounds just like Cleveland Brown, the animated character that originated on Family Guy and has now moved on to his own show. Same tone, same cadence, same emphatic delivery.
Seems only fair since Lewis is a bit of a cartoon himself.
