Iran tells John Kerry thanks, but no thanks

by editor on January 5, 2010

The French-looking John Kerry can retreat even faster than real Frenchmen

As if being rejected by Americans in the 2004 election wasn’t enough of a blow to his delicate ego, John Kerry’s now been rejected by a second country: Iran.

The French-looking Democrat from Massachusetts had dreams of meeting with the mullahs and somehow solving the Iran nuclear stand-off with the power of his personality.


The Hill tells Kerry’s tragic tale:

Iranian legislators on Sunday decided to not allow a visit from Senate Foreign Relations Committee Chairman John Kerry (D-Mass.), according to Iranian media.

“Members of the Iranian parliament’s Foreign Relations Committee (a subcommittee of the parliament’s National Security and Foreign Policy Commission) voiced opposition to the request after studying the issue,” Hassan Ebrahimi, head of the committee, told the semi-official Fars News Agency.

Kerry’s office responded that he “had no plans to visit Iran.”

Of course, if the mullahs had said, “Come on down,” Kerry would have told his pilot to gas up Ketchup One and get it out on the runway.

Source: The Hill

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And when we say “solid B-plus“ we mean it’s a complete, dismal failure.

Yes, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton has ‘fessed up that Barack Obama’s “smart diplomacy,” which seems to be comprised of writing pretty letters and giving pretty speeches aimed at Iran, has produced results just as impressive as the smart diplomacy policy with North Korea. Which is zero.

This video demonstrates a first: Former UN Ambassador John Bolton and Clinton agreeing on something.

Source: Gateway Pundit

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Is that a Somali pirate behind those Foster-Grants?

Is that a Somali pirate behind those Foster-Grants?

It’s a conundrum. Who do you root for when a ragged band of Somali pirates hijacks an Iranian fishing boat?

Iranian Deputy Managing Director for Maritime Affairs Saeed Izadian said an Axis of Evil fishing boat has been captured in international waters by Somali pirates on Sunday.

“A number of armed men off the coast of Somalia hijacked this Iranian vessel,” Izadian sputtered.

He pegged the number of crewmen held hostage at 29, saying that pirates have not yet demanded a ransom.

Iranian fishermen versus Somali pirates. Vegas oddsmakers say take the fishermen and the points.

Source: New York Post

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Demonstrating how the Fairness Doctrine would work on American radio, the Iranian government warned protesters that “Death to America” was the only government-sanctioned chant and that anyone caught chanting anything else would face severe punishment.

In response, thousands of pro-democracy protesters interrupted government-sponsored rallies marking the 30th anniversary of the Iranian take-over of the U.S. Embassy by chanting “Death to the dictator.”

This, of course, caused great distress on the part of Iranian Supreme Leader Khamenei, the dictator in question.

The same protesters repeatedly chanted, “Obama, are you with us or against us?”

No report as to whether this caused any distress on the part of the American Supreme Leader. But we doubt it.

H/T: AP Check

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Monkeys can be mean little sons of bitches

Monkeys can be mean little sons of bitches

Britain and other European Union nations are having trouble negotiating with the missilized mullahs of Iran. Who’d a thunk?

“It’s like playing chess with a monkey,” said one diplomat close to the talks. “You get them to checkmate, and then they swallow the king.”

Two points:

First, if an American diplomat had uttered those words, he would immediately be removed from his position and forced to apologize for comparing the fine, upstanding mullahs to monkeys.

Second, the idiot Europeans obviously haven’t tried America’s super successful approach. Just give them a big, wide grin and a hearty handshake and insult your own country.

Works every time for President Obama.

Source: Telegraph UK

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President Obama may have said he’s not interested in victory when it comes to Iran, but there’s another Obama who knows how important it is to win.

“It’s a battle — we’re going to win — take no prisoners,” Michelle Obama told reporters.

Unfortunately, she wasn’t talking about Iran. She wasn’t talking about Afghanistan. She wasn’t even talking about the healthcare battle. No, Mrs O was talking about her efforts to win the 2016 Olympics for Chicago.

We say put the woman in charge of our foreign policy.

After all, who would you rather face in a street fight? The scrawny, smiling, appeasing Barack Obama or a hard-as-nails, looming linebacker like Michelle?

Source: Political Ticker

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According to the Huffington Post, President Obama is a chess master extraordinaire. No, really. That’s what they said:

President Obama knew about the secret Iranian facility nine months ago. Before he began his strategy of engagement, he knew Iran was lying about its program. When he extended his hand in friendship, he knew Iran had built a secret factory to enrich uranium. Before he offered direct talks, he knew Iran was hiding a nuclear weapons breakout capability.

Each move was denounced as “weak” and “naïve” by the right. That talk looks foolish today. These were the moves of chess master, carefully positioning pieces on the board, laying a trap, and springing it at the opportune moment.

Well, actually, the moves still look weak and naive to us.

We’d say the Huffington Post has it slightly wrong. Obama looks more like the president of the high school chess club than a chess master. And Mahmoud Ahmadinejad looks like one of the tough kids who’s about to give him a wedgie.


– Written by Patrick Michael

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You know you have a problem when the President of France is tougher than the President of the United States.

You know you have a problem when the President of France is tougher than the President of the United States.

What does it say when the President of France has more testosterone than the American President of the United States?

As the WSJ described the surreal scene at the UN, “At least the French President tried to sound tough, which isn’t hard when you stand next to Mr. Obama.” (Ouch!) After Obama used most of his United Nations speech to blather on about climate change and “a world without nuclear weapons,” Sarkozy brought him back to the real world.

Obama said, “We must never stop until we see the day when nuclear arms have been banished from the face of the earth.”

“We live in the real world, not the virtual world,” Sarkozy responded. “And the real world expects us to make decisions.”

Sarkozy continued to school Obama with more teachable moments:

“President Obama dreams of a world without weapons … but right in front of us two countries are doing the exact opposite.

“Iran since 2005 has flouted five security council resolutions. North Korea has been defying council resolutions since 1993.

“I support the extended hand of the Americans, but what good has proposals for dialogue brought the international community? More uranium enrichment and declarations by the leaders of Iran to wipe a UN member state off the map,” he continued, referring to Israel.

Talk about timing: Just as Obama wants to unilaterally lay down his nuclear arms, another inconvenient truth crops up in the form of a second Iranian nuclear facility. Seems like the last time Obama talked about disarming, the North Koreans tested another missile. Not that it fazed Obama.

Needless to say, we were shocked—shocked!—that Sarkozy’s mocking response to Obama’s utopian UN speechifying went unreported in U.S. newspapers.

Is it any wonder that newspapers continue to lose readers when they won’t even print news?


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Benjamin Netanyahu asks the question any reasonable person would ask.

“The man who called the Holocaust a lie spoke at this podium. To those who refused to come and to those who left in protest, I commend you. You stood up for moral clarity and you brought honor to your countries. But to those who gave this Holocaust denier a hearing, I say on behalf of my people, the Jewish people, and decent people everywhere — have you no shame? Have you no decency?”

Sadly, the answer seems crystal clear.

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No tea for you, Mahmoud.

No tea for you, Mahmoud.

Well, now this will teach those pesky Iranians that we mean business. This must be what the Obama administration means by “tough sanctions.”

According to the Jerusalem Post:

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad will be unlikely to receive an invitation to a reception US President Barack Obama will host in New York later this month, the White House said Thursday.

The reception for world leaders will take place during the United Nations General Assembly meeting.

White House spokesman Robert Gibbs said he doubts that Ahmadinejad will be invited because “Iran is failing to live up to its international obligations.”

Ahmadinejad, ever the party animal, said, “Who needs Obama’s tea party? I’ll be at the Yankee game that night, throwing kisses at sexy Bronx Bomber shortstop Derek Jeter. Hubba,hubba.”

SourceJerusalem Post

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State sanctioned execution of homosexuals in <s>Alabama</s> <s>Mississippi</s> Iran

State sanctioned execution of homosexuals in Alabama Mississippi Iran

OK, so maybe Huffington Post writer Johann Hari didn’t exactly say gays were being beheaded in the Deep South, but that’s exactly what he implied by saying that the Deep South one of the most homophobic places on Earth.

This bizarre assertion came in an article that defended Bruno, Sacha Baron Cohen’s movie about a gay Austrian fashion designer:

The joke isn’t on gay people; it’s on the bigots who, when confronted with this creation, believe he is real, and typical of gays. Baron Cohen literally risked his life to make the point. He went to some of the most homophobic places on earth — the refugee camps of the Middle East, and the Deep South of the US — and behaved as a gargoyle drawn from the subconscious fears of homophobes.

There you have it. Homophobia is as bad in the American South as it is in the Middle East. Except for one thing. Unless we’re mistaken, they’re only comparable in the twisted mind of Johann Hari.

Hari should read what the Gay and Lesbian Humanist Association says about homosexuality in Islamic countries:

Homosexuality is illegal in most Muslim countries and punishable by death in several. Amnesty International, Homan (an exiled Iranian group) and other human rights groups regularly report shocking abuses and crimes against homosexuals. For example, in April 2001, nine gay men were given prison terms of 4 to 5 years with 2400 to 2600 lashes in Saudi Arabia. Abdul Sami (18) and Bismillah (22) were killed by the Taliban by having a wall toppled on them in 1998. In 2001, 52 men were arrested following a party on a river boat and charged with “immoral behaviour” and “contempt of religion” in Egypt (a supposedly “moderate” Islamic country). Many were given prison sentences with hard labour.

Iran has been particularly enthusiastic in its persecution of homosexuals. Estimates of the numbers of gay and lesbian people this evil regime has murdered range from hundreds to thousands but, as many executions are not public, and bereaved families may cover up the reasons out of shame, the higher estimates are plausible. Those cases that have been publicised include three gay men and two lesbians beheaded in January 1990, and 70 people executed in the early 1980s for trying to set up a lesbian and gay organisation. The Iranian Chief Justice, Morteza Moghtadai, justified the 1990 beheadings by saying, “The religious punishment for the despicable act of homosexuality is death for both parties.” False, trumped-up charges of homosexuality are also used to suppress political opponents, as happened to Dr Ali Mozaffarian, a Sunni Muslim leader executed in Shiraz in 1992.

Now we readily admit that we can’t read every newspaper in the world every day. So we may have missed the stories about gays being beheaded in Alabama and lesbians sentenced to hard labor in Mississippi.

Or maybe there’s another possibility:

Perhaps the HuffPo writer is as prejudiced against Southerners as he claims Southerners are against homosexuals.


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Polar bears are united in opposition to Iranian democracy

Polar bears are united in opposition to Iranian democracy

Any minute now, we expect Al Gore to come out against the Iranian democracy protests. All because of this report:

“Iran’s Ministry of Energy has asked all Iranian citizens to lower their use of electricity in the late hours of the night. Protesters have been using electrical appliances en masse to disrupt the electricity supply in the country…”

For god’s sake, is their silly little protest really worth this needless increase in carbon footprints? What difference does it make if they die in the streets or die when the rising tides sweep away the entire nation? What possible difference does it make if freedom lives, but polar bears die?

Oh, the humanity.

Source: AP Check

Dueling Headlines

by editor on July 12, 2009

Obama “excited” by Iran’s robust election debate
Source: Reuters

Official: Obama Administration Skeptical of Iran’s Election Results

You know the world has gone insane when al Jazeera shows more support for democracy than the President of the United States does.

You know the world has gone insane when al Jazeera shows more support for democracy than the President of the United States does.

You know there’s a problem when al Jazeera runs an opinion piece that criticizes President Obama’s weak-kneed support for Iranian democracy.

Here are a few of the Arabic news service’s pithier comments:

Zinger #1: “It took two weeks of intensified government repression against protesters in Iran before Barack Obama, the US president, moved from cautious commentary to describing the crackdown as ‘violent and unjust.’”

Zinger #2: “Obama is acutely aware of the real reason why he cannot be too forceful in supporting the millions of Iranians demanding to have their votes counted. The problem is not with US administrations long past, but with the policies of the current administration.”

Zinger #3: “The substance of Obama’s foreign policies in the Middle East and North Africa remain in many key areas strikingly similar to, and are in some cases more aggressive than, those of George Bush, his predecessor.”

Zinger #4: “Does Obama really not understand that Mubarak’s interest is not in peace, but rather in an unending peace process that ensures his continued relevance and billions of dollars in no-strings-attached American aid?”

Zinger #5: “Ultimately, it is the reality of the Obama administration’s support for a discredited status quo across the region, and not the actions of the Eisenhower administration half a century ago, that makes it impossible for the US to play a forceful role advocating for democracy in Iran at this crucial moment in the history of the Islamic Republic, and ours as well.”

The Emperor has no clothes. But as far as his acolytes are concerned, that just highlights his well-toned pecs.

Source: al Jazeera via

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CNN's credibility is tattered and twittered

CNN's credibility is tattered and twittered

Which will vanish from CNN sooner – its last viewer or its last remaining shred of credibility? It’s a race down to the wire.

At a time when the Iranian thugocracy has clamped down on foreign reporters, CNN still managed to get some great quotes from unnamed pro-democracy protesters. Unfortunately for CNN, the sharp-eyed folks at BNO News figured out why they were unnamed – the quotes were actually tweets that had been posted by an anonymous Iranian Twitterer called PersianKiwi.

Here are PersianKiwi’s original tweets posted in the morning hours of June 24:

they were waiting for us – they all have guns and riot uniforms – it was like a mouse trap – ppl being shot like animals #Iranelection 6:53 AM Jun 24th from web

I see many ppl with broken arms/legs/heads – blood everywhere – pepper gas like war – #Iranelection 6:35 AM Jun 24th from web

Later in the day, posted the following story:

TEHRAN, Iran (CNN) — Security forces wielding clubs and firing weapons beat back hundreds of would-be demonstrators who had flocked to a square in the capital on Wednesday to continue protests against an election they have denounced as fraudulent, witnesses told CNN.

“They were waiting for us,” one source said. “They all have guns and riot uniforms. It was like a mouse trap.”

“I see many people with broken arms, legs, heads – blood everywhere – pepper gas like war,” the source said.

Similar unnamed “sources” tell us that Ashton Kutcher is heading for the store to buy some cheese and crackers. But we’re not putting in a story.

Uh-oh. Looks like we just did.

Source: Gawker via

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President Obama reacts to another Mahmoud Ahmadinejad gutbuster

President Obama reacts to another Mahmoud Ahmadinejad gutbuster

We’ve been laughing so damn hard we can’t catch our breath. Give us just a sec. OK, OK, OK, we think we can continue with this story now.

Fox News reports, “President Obama said Friday that he doesn’t take Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s demand for an apology seriously after the Iranian president accused him of interfering in the country’s affairs.

“’I don’t take Mr. Ahmadinejad’s statements seriously about apologies, especially given the fact that the United States has gone out of its way not to interfere with the election process in Iran and I’m really not concerned about Mr. Ahmadinejad apologizing to me,’ Obama said in a joint White House appearance with German Chancellor Angela Merkel after they conferred privately.”

And who can blame the President? That Mahmoud is such a well-known kidder. Those weren’t protests in Iran, they were laugh riots. He’s like an Iranian Shecky Greene. The Henny Youngman of the Middle East. You just can’t take the guy seriously.

“I just flew in from Tehran and, boy, are my arms tired.”


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The sad decline of #iranelection tweets

by editor on June 28, 2009

Iran iranelection tweets

Twitter is widely recognized for the role it has played in assisting the people of Iran in their struggle to regain their voice, lost in the 1979 Iranian Revolution. The tweets (Twitter messages) from supporters all around the world, particularly the United States, gave them hope, tactical and logistical information, and importantly, a megaphone to the outside world.

The volume of tweets was astonishing, producing never before seen numbers. It was so invaluable that our state department asked Twitter to postpone a critical scheduled system maintenance. Tens of thousands of tweets tagged with the hashtag #iranelection were being made each hour.

But, the chart (real-time here) above sadly tells the tale of the declining Twitter activity of this nascent second Iranian Revolution. We attribute part of it to the punishing crackdown by the Mullahs. The rest can be explained only by the short attention span of the media and its spectators. On to the next topic: Michael Jackson, which was enough to even snuff out most discussion of the Cap and Trade vote.

But, maybe, just maybe if our president would have “meddled,” and led a Reagan-like rallying cry, it might have kept the issue alive in the media, ignited the world beyond Twitter, to whole nations, to do more for the Iranian people. What could we have done more? We don’t know exactly. We never do. And we will never know.

The “hope” seems to be gone now, the once-in-a-generation chance for “change” gone. Inspiring, courageous leaders, who believe their words, make a difference.

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Zahra Rahnavard, wife of Iranian “reformist” candidate Hossein Mousavi, is often referred to as an agent of change. But this photo of Zahra stomping on homemade flags of Great Britain, the United States and Israel makes you wonder what kind of change they’re talking about. quotes Zahra as saying, “I and my husband are mujahids to the last drop of our blood – fighting side by side with the Muslims of the world for the sake of Islam and the Qur’an, and in confrontation of kufir and shirk embodied by the US, western imperialism and fellow travellers. My ambition is to see all Muslims rise on those lines until the day arrives when the world is transformed into an Islamic garden of faith, justice, and equality. They see it far away and we see it nearby.

We don’t often agree with President Obama here at, but he may have been right on when he said there wasn’t much difference between Achmadinejad and Mousavi. At least there doesn’t appear to be much difference between Achmadinejad and Mousavi’s wife.

So like your mother always said, “Be careful what you wish for, you stinking little imperialist, Zionist pig.”

Source: Creeping Sharia

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Freedom fighters: Reagan versus Obama

by editor on June 26, 2009

There’s a reason they erect statues of Ronald Reagan in Eastern Europe. It’s the same reason they won’t be erecting any statues of Barack Obama in Iran.

This video clip perfectly contrasts Reagan’s outspoken support for Poland’s freedom fighters to the Obama administration’s tepid non-comments about Iran.

Source: Gateway Pundit

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Do not forget what happened to Saddam Hussein sign

That poor, deluded George Bush. He actually thought the establishment of a democracy in Iraq would inspire democratic movements in other Muslim nations.

But Bush was apparently wrong. Barack Obama credits his own Cairo speech for inspiring the Lebanese voters’ to reject Hezbollah. And he’s probably equally confident that this new Iranian protest sign was inspired when he said spoke those powerful words, “It’s not productive given the history of U.S.-Iranian relations to be seen as meddling.”

Perhaps the following slogan would serve as a warning to Barack Obama:

“Do not forget what happened to Jimmy Carter.”

Source: Gateway Pundit

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President Obama unveils his new hot dog diplomacy

President Obama unveils his new hot dog diplomacy

How is the President dealing with the oppressive Iranian regime? By wooing them with wieners at a series of 4th of July celebrations around the world.

No. Seriously. Blood may be flowing in the streets of Tehran, but that won’t keep the ketchup from flowing at our embassies around the world.

Hot Dog Diplomacy

Earlier this month, Obama ordered our embassies to invite Iranian diplomats to their annual 4th of July celebrations. And in the minds of Obama’s state department officials, Iran’s brutal oppression of freedom fighters is no reason to dis-invite them from our celebrations of freedom.

“There’s no thought to rescinding the invitations to Iranian diplomats,” State Department spokesman Ian Kelly said.

“We have made a strategic decision to engage on a number of fronts with Iran,” he continued. “We tried many years of isolation, and we’re pursuing a different path now.”

“Pork ribs,” Joe Biden thought to himself. “Let’s offer ‘em pork ribs. Everybody loves a good pork rib.”

Source: AFP

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The self-described “most transparent administration in history” took another step toward self-immolation at the President’s press conference today.

Just moments before the press conference began, Huffington Post reporter Nico Pitney was personally escorted from the nether regions of the White House Press Room by deputy press secretary Josh Earnest. Pitney was awarded a prime spot just inside the barricade.

Miraculously, President Obama not only singled out Pitney for a question, but seemed to know exactly what the question would be, setting off alarms for all the other reporters present.

“Nico, I know you and all across the Internet, we’ve been seeing a lot of reports coming out of Iran,” Obama said. “I know there may actually be questions from people in Iran who are communicating through the Internet. Do you have a question?”

Pitney pretended to ignore Obama’s introduction and asked his question as if the President hadn’t tipped it: “I wanted to use this opportunity to ask you a question directly from an Iranian.”

Of course, Chris Matthews will say this just proves that the president has added clairvoyance to his other remarkable talents he has exhibited as The Greatest President In the Universe.


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WTF? Iranian protesters get more support from the Egyptian dictatorship than they do from President Obama.

WTF? Iranian protesters get more support from the Egyptian dictatorship than they do from President Obama.

Barack Obama is an amazing man. He spoke in Cairo on June 4 and instantly transformed the entire Middle East. In fact, the transformation has been so complete that the dictatorial regime in Egypt can now give Obama lessons on how to speak out against the brutal Iranian regime.

Here’s a translation of a June 18 editorial from the Egyptian government daily Al-Ahram:

Events in Iran have followed in close succession since the announcement that fundamentalist candidate Ahmadinejad was elected to a second term in the presidential elections. Between the mass demonstrations [of the reformists] decrying electoral fraud, and the counter-demonstrations accusing the reformists of allegiance to the West, the international community has stood confused about what position to take towards this democratic outpouring in a country that is on the threshold of acquiring nuclear capabilities, something all international and regional actors consider an unwelcome development.

The caution that has characterized the position of the principle international actors towards the abuses occurring in the streets of Iran, up to and including the killing [of protesters], may be sending the wrong message to the ruling powers there. The upshot of this message is that the strong desire to reach a political resolution to the Iranian nuclear crisis and to avoid a clash with the Iranian authorities is a goal that supersedes all other considerations – even if these other considerations be support for international principles and human rights, and the urging of the [Iranian] government to stop the violence and bloodshed and to lend an ear to the views of the Iranian opposition. [This opposition] has expressed its rejection of the election results and its resistance to a second term for the current president, primarily for domestic reasons, and principle among them [Ahmadinejad’s] failed management of the economy.

In other words, grow some cojones, President Obama.

(“Cojones,” of course, is an Arabic word meaning “backbone.”)

Source: Al-Ahram via Gateway Pundit

Democracy? You want democracy? Haven't you heard about global warming?

Democracy? You want democracy? Haven't you heard about global warming?

Here’s how the Guardian UK reports Obama’s release Wednesday of a new report on global warming:

“The Obama administration is poised for its most forceful confrontation with the American public on the sweeping and life-altering consequences of a failure to act on global warming with the release today of a long-awaited scientific report on climate change.”

And here’s how the same newspaper reports his response to the democratic movement in Iran:

“It’s not productive given the history of U.S.-Iranian relations to be seen as meddling.”

It’s also not productive, apparently, to have a backbone or core beliefs.

Source: Guardian UK

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