Win $150 by dressing The World’s Most Beautiful First Lady

Mrs-O.org is promoting a contest in which you can win $150 for dressing a digital Michelle Obama in the best combination of fashion items.

Michelle Obama fashion contest A website devoted to The One’s number two is hyping a new dress-up game.

That’s right. Mrs-O.org is promoting a contest in which you can win $150 for dressing a digital Michelle Obama in the best combination of fashion items.

You could dress her as a fearless First Lady. Or as a hospital Vice President plotting a patient dumping scheme. Dress her for an America-hatin’ Sunday morning in Reverend Wright’s church. Dress her for a date night in New York city at the taxpayer’s expense. Why, the possibilities are virtually endless.

In what can only be considered a major fashion faux pas, the list of fashion items includes neither a burka nor a linebacker uniform.

H/T: ClosetClouture.com

Oh, la la! French politician who jumped to Polanski’s defense also jumped young boys

Frédéric Mitterrand, the French culture minister and the first major political figure to leap to the defense of Roman Polanski, admitted in his autobiography that he paid “young boys” for sex

Never trust a man who poses for photos like Frédéric Mitterrand
Never trust a man who poses for photos like Frédéric Mitterrand

Frédéric Mitterrand, the French culture minister and the first major political figure to leap to the defense of Roman Polanski, admitted in his autobiography that he paid “young boys” for sex while he was traveling in Thailand.

Here’s how the Guardian UK reports the story:

Mitterrand’s impassioned comments in support of Polanski, who had initially faces charges of rape, and against an “a frightening America”, were controversial and the French government eventually distanced itself.

But Mitterrand’s critics on the political extreme right and the left have now questioned his suitability for office over his self-confessed penchant for “young boys” in Bangkok.

In his bestselling autobiographical work, The Bad Life, published in 2005, Mitterrand describes travelling round Thailand, confessing: “I got into the habit of paying for boys”.

He wrote of his attraction to young male prostitutes despite knowing “the sordid details” of the sex trade. “All these rituals of the market for youths, the slave market excited me enormously … the abundance of very attractive and immediately available young boys put me in a state of desire.”

French. Culture. Minister. ‘Nuff said.

Source: Guardian UK

We pause now to honor another outstanding black American who deserves the Nobel Peace Prize

We’re tired of all the talk about President Obama and the Nobel Peace Prize. Let’s talk instead about another fine, upstanding black man who has been unfairly denied the same honor for far too long.

Blah, blah, blah. We’re tired of all the talk about President Obama and the Nobel Peace Prize. Let’s talk instead about another fine, upstanding black man who has been unfairly denied the same honor for far too long.

We beg, we beseech, we implore, we demand that the Nobel Prize Committee right this long-standing wrong.

Give the damn award to Rodney King. And give it now.

O’Reilly fantasizes to Bachmann: “You and Sarah Palin are good-looking women” who “drive the far left crazy”

Is it just us or does Bill O’Reilly get just a little too enthusiastic in telling Michele Bachmann that she and Sarah Palin are very attractive women. Settle down, big fella, settle down.

Is it just us or does Bill O’Reilly get just a little too enthusiastic in telling Michele Bachmann that she and Sarah Palin are very attractive women. Settle down, big fella, settle down.

Source: MofoPolitics.com

A quote that could have been about Barack Obama and the Chicago Olympic bid

Baseball Hall of Famer Ralph Kiner tells this story in his autobiography: “After the season in which I hit 37 home runs, I asked Pittsburgh Pirate general manager Branch Rickey for a raise. He refused.

ralph-kinerBaseball Hall of Famer Ralph Kiner tells this story in his autobiography:

“After the season in which I hit 37 home runs, I asked Pittsburgh Pirate general manager Branch Rickey for a raise. He refused.

‘I led the league in homers,’ I reminded him.

‘Where did we finish?’ Rickey asked me.

‘Last,’ I replied.

‘Well,’ Rickey said, ‘We can finish last without you.’”

The greatest headline in history: “One gay man, two lesbians, a three-legged cat and a poisoned curry plot”

This sounds like one of those “The Pope, a rabbi and an imam were stranded in a boat” jokes, but it’s not. Naturally, it comes from England.

Tripod, a 3-legged cat that has absolutely nothing to do with this story.
Tripod, a 3-legged cat that has absolutely nothing to do with this story.

This sounds like one of those “The Pope, a rabbi and an imam were stranded in a boat” jokes, but it’s not. Naturally, it comes from England.

Let’s just let the Daily Mail UK explain it:

A gay man tried to poison his lesbian neighbours by putting slug pellets into their curry after he was accused of kidnapping their three-legged cat.

Gary Stewart, 37, had been at loggerheads with Marie Walton and Beverley Sales for months.

But things looked brighter when he made a peace offering of some curry, claiming he had ordered too much from the Indian takeaway.

When the women started to eat, they found the curry studded with slug pellets.

They called the police and Stewart was arrested.

He appeared before magistrates in Manchester where he admitted attempting to poison the two women on September 22.

He denied a further charge of making threats to kill.

Last night it emerged that Miss Walton, a full-time mother, and Miss Sales, a goods vehicle driver, had been the victims of an apparent hate campaign by Stewart at their home in Denton, Manchester.

Stewart is even alleged to have kidnapped the family’s three-legged cat, Amber, and dumped her in a village miles away.

There’s nothing we can add to this story. Absolutely nothing.

Source: Daily Mail UK

Distaste for disaster: New end-of-the-world movie is unintentionally hilarious

When we read that there was a new disaster film called “2012,” we assumed it was about Democrats retaining control of both houses of congress. Luckily, we were wrong.

When we read that there was a new disaster film called “2012,” we assumed it was about Democrats retaining control of both houses of congress.

Luckily, we were wrong.

2012 tells the supposedly terrifying story of a world simultaneously struck by fires, earthquakes, meteor showers and floods. Let’s not forget airplanes crumbling skyscrapers, continents slipping beneath the seas, and highways buckling like roller coasters.

Amazingly, they left out global warming and adult acne.

Directed by Roland Emmerich, the guy behind other over-the-top movies like “Independence Day” and “The Day After Tomorrow,” it stars leftists John Cusack, Danny Glover, Woody Harrelson, and Amanda Peet, plus Thandie Newton, whose politics we don’t know, and Chiwetel Ejiofor, who we’ve never heard of.

One critic said, “The 2012 The Worst is Over Movie Clip that recently found its way online is full of the absurd action and grand special effects … As the clip continues, the delivered action is so over-the-top it almost looks like an cartoon.”

Oh, wait. We’re wrong again.

That was a review of the Obama administration’s first nine months.

Source: Daily Mail UK

Idiot Somali pirates attack harmless cargo vessel, find out it’s a French warship

A group of brilliant Somali pirates stormed what they thought was a defenseless cargo vessel. Imagine their surprise when it turned out to be a heavily-armed French navy ship. Needless to say, the pirates came out second best in the encounter.

Arghhhh. No one ever said pirates were smart.
Arghhhh. No one ever said pirates were smart.

A group of brilliant Somali pirates stormed what they thought was a defenseless cargo vessel. Imagine their surprise when it turned out to be a heavily-armed French navy ship. Needless to say, the pirates came out second best in the encounter.

Here’s how the BBC reports the story:

French military spokesman Admiral Christophe Prazuck said the pirates attacked in skiffs late at night some 500km (310 miles) off the Somali coast.

But the command and supply ship, the Somme, repelled the attack and chased the pirates, capturing five of them.

…Admiral Prazuck told French TV station La Chaine Info the pirates seemed to be surprised that the navy ship fought back.

“Once they realised they were facing a ship that was responding and was heading towards them, they stopped shooting and attempted to flee,” he said.

“The Somme gave chase and intercepted one of the pirates’ boats. All the weapons had apparently been tossed into the sea and the suspected pirates are now being held on board the Somme.”

You know they’re bad pirates when they get defeated by the French military.

Source: BBC

Did Dennis Miller really say Fox is successful despite Hannity and Beck?

Bill O’Reilly and Dennis Miller use the 13th anniversary of Fox News to laugh and scratch and analyze why so many people love the network. And why so many hate it.

Bill O’Reilly and Dennis Miller use the 13th anniversary of Fox News to laugh and scratch and analyze why so many people love the network. And why so many hate it.

It’s Miller at his best — including hilarious comments on CNN, MSNBC, Fox, Hannity, Beck, Roger Ailes, and the hot women of Fox.

Source: MofoPolitics.com

Welcome to “How Will He Die?” the Hamas mascot death watch guessing game

“Pioneers of Tomorrow” is a sick, sick Hamas TV program for kids. Over the years, it’s starred a series of cute Disney-esque characters who teach Palestinian children about the glory of killing Jews and dying for Islam in the process.

“Pioneers of Tomorrow” is a sick, sick Hamas TV program for kids. Over the years, it’s starred a series of cute Disney-esque characters who teach Palestinian children about the glory of killing Jews and dying for Islam in the process.

Those cute, cuddly hosts always end up dying for their “noble” cause. (We’ve always hated Mighty Mouse and wished he would have met an untimely end, but we digress.)

Some unknown wit has put together this montage called “How Will He Die?” that lets you guess how each of the unfortunate characters went to meet his maker (and, we assume, 49 cute, furry virgins).

Also see our previous article, Moderate Muslim Mickey Mouse brutally murdered
by evil Jew.

Source: Tim Blair

Appeasement Prize. They meant to say Appeasement Prize.

An audience gasped audibly when Barack Obama was announced as the winner of the Nobel Peace Prize. How to you say WTF in Swedish? They meant to say Appeasement Prize.

Nobel Appeasement Prize Medal Barack Obama

An audience gasped audibly when Barack Obama was announced as the winner of the Nobel Peace Prize. How to you say WTF in Swedish?

C’mon, America! You can do it! John Kerry says a depression can help us meet emission goals!

The United States has already this year alone achieved a 6% reduction in emissions simply because of the downturn in the economy, so we are effectively saying we need to go another 14%.

The lovely Teresa Heinz Kerry and her second favorite condiment
The lovely Teresa Heinz Kerry and her second favorite condiment

Massachusetts Democrat Senator John Kerry may have the face of a horse, but he lacks horse sense.

The Massachusetts Democrat is backing Cap-and-Trade, a mindboggling waste of money designed to combat so-called global warming by slapping taxes on energy.

“Let me emphasize something very strongly as we begin this discussion,” Kerry said. “The United States has already this year alone achieved a 6% reduction in emissions simply because of the downturn in the economy, so we are effectively saying we need to go another 14%.

C’mon, America. Join John Kerry’s quest to achieve lower greenhouse gas emissions by sinking into a never-ending state of economic depression.

But, you may ask, how can the country survive when it’s unable to produce anything of any value?

Simple. We’ll do it the same way John Kerry does it. By marrying a homely, rich widow nation that will give us all the money we need.

Maybe Norway would like to be our sugar momma.

Source: Wall Street Journal

More new terminology from the Obama administation: “Illegal aliens” are now “newly-arrived asylum seekers”

Janet Napolitano has announced that the people who were once called “illegal aliens” and were then called “illegal immigrants” and were then called “undocumented immigrants” are now to be called “newly-arrived asylum seekers.”

Newly-arrived asylum seekers waiting to check into the Presidential Suite at the St Regis Monarch Beach Hotel
Newly-arrived asylum seekers waiting to check into the Presidential Suite at the St Regis Monarch Beach Hotel

It gets harder and harder to keep a straight face while listening to Obama administration.

Case in point: Janet Napolitano has announced that the people who were once called “illegal aliens” and were then called “illegal immigrants” and were then called “undocumented immigrants” are now to be called “newly-arrived asylum seekers.”

Here’s how Reuters reports the story:

Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano said illegal immigrants ranging from criminals to newly arrived asylum seekers would be held in different facilities according to the risk they pose.

“This is a system that encompasses many different types of detainees, not all of whom need to be held in prison-like circumstances,” Napolitano told a conference call.

Referring to noncriminals such as newly arrived asylum seekers, Napolitano said, “We will begin efforts to house these populations near immigration service providers and pursue different options like converted hotels or residential facilities for their detention.”

And now, as they say, the second shoe dropping, courtesy of Bloomberg:
Continue reading “More new terminology from the Obama administation: “Illegal aliens” are now “newly-arrived asylum seekers””

Chris Matthews guest delivers news MSNBC host doesn’t want to hear

Poor Chris Matthews. Poor, poor Chris Matthews. The MSNBC host is bitterly clinging to the results of a new poll that show President Obama’s approval numbers roaring back to life.

Poor Chris Matthews. Poor, poor Chris Matthews.

The MSNBC host is bitterly clinging to the results of a new poll that show President Obama’s approval numbers roaring back to life.

Of course, Matthews attributes The One’s sinking fortunes to “all the crazy stuff of the summer.” You know, crazy stuff like “the tea parties, the birthers, the nutbags out there.”

Unfortunately, guests Charlie Cook of the Cook Political Report and John Harris of the Politico weren’t so eager to agree with Matthews assessment of the situation. It was their unenviable task to tell Matthews that the pole he cited was an outlier and inconsistent with all the other polls.

For the first time in recent memory, Matthews was almost stunned into silence. Which would have almost made his show watchable.

Source: NewsBuster.org

There’s so much cold weather, this week’s Horrible, Gore-able Headlines has to run early this week

Looks like the mild summer is being followed by a cold fall and an early winter. But don’t worry. It’s all just part of that global warming climate change crisis thing.

Looks like the mild summer is being followed by a cold fall and an early winter. But don’t worry. It’s all just part of that global warming climate change crisis thing.

SNOW PILING UP: Idaho school kids enjoy ‘earliest snow day in history’
Source: KTVB.com

Colorado ski resort boasts ‘earliest opening day in 40 years’
Source: DenverPost.com

Vegas ski resort to open ‘earlier than it ever has’
Source: Fox5Vegas.com

Calif. wildfire stalled by record low temperatures
Source: Associated Press

Snow on Sunday! ‘Would be earliest measurable in Chicago’
Source: NBC Chicago

Ted Kennedy admitted to sleeping with more than 1,000 women

The National Enquirer says that Teddy Kennedy wanted his recently-published memoirs to include details of his sexual conquests. Unfortunately, the primmest and most-proper of the legendarily prim and proper Kennedy clan censored the embarrassing revelations out of his autobiography.

You want somma 'dis? You want somma 'dis? You want somma 'dis?
You want somma 'dis? You want somma 'dis? You want somma 'dis?

We’re almost embarrassed to say this, but two-headed aliens and Hollywood gossip aside, the National Enquirer seems to do a good job with political reporting. Consider the sad saga of John Edwards and his baby mama.

Now the Enquirer says that Teddy Kennedy wanted his recently-published memoirs to include details of his sexual conquests. Unfortunately, the primmest and most-proper of the legendarily prim and proper Kennedy clan censored the embarrassing revelations out of his autobiography.

Here’s how the Enquirer reports it:

Ted Kennedy slept with more than a thousand women – and spent at least $10 million in hush money over the years to keep his skirt-chasing a secret!

The late senator made those sensational confessions in a chapter of his autobiography, but horrified family members and advisers cut them out.

Before he died of brain cancer at age 77 on Aug. 25, the womanizing politician also revealed that he planned to seduce Mary Jo Kopechne on the night she drowned, said a close source.

Our sources say it was only 500 women, not 1000. But since Kennedy was seeing double most of his adult life, the mistake is understandable.

Source: National Enquirer

Idiot Levi Johnston to pose for gay men’s magazine

We’re going to give Levi Johnston the benefit of the doubt and assume that neither he nor his advisors are familiar with the demographics of Playgirl magazine readers.

Somehow, we dont think Levi Johnston will like the thought of gay men looking at his...uhh...his...never mind
Somehow, we dont think Levi Johnston will like the thought of gay men looking at his...uhh...his...never mind

We’re going to give Levi Johnston the benefit of the doubt and assume that neither he nor his advisors are familiar with the demographics of Playgirl magazine readers. They undoubtedly thought, “Ahhh, Playgirl. Lots of women readers.”

That would be an incorrect assumption.

Posing nude for Playgirl is next for the 19-year-old father of Sarah Palin’s grandchild. Johnston’s attorney, Rex Butler, said Wednesday that a formal agreement has not been reached with the online magazine but adds it’s a “foregone conclusion” it will happen…

To get ready for his close-up, Johnston “is training three hours a day, six nights a week at an Anchorage gym with a local body builder, Marvin Jones, a former Mr. Alaska competitor.

When was the last time you saw a woman reading Playgirl magazine? Never?

Wikipedia says,
Continue reading “Idiot Levi Johnston to pose for gay men’s magazine”

ABC reporter anoints Obama “the world’s prom king”

ABC News correspondent Claire Shipman may have given President Obama the silliest endorsement ever. And to paraphrase Whoopi Goldberg, we don’t just mean ever. We mean ever ever.

Claire Shipman dreaming that the Prom King asks her to dance
Claire Shipman dreaming that the Prom King asks her to dance

ABC News correspondent Claire Shipman may have given President Obama the silliest endorsement ever. And to paraphrase Whoopi Goldberg, we don’t just mean ever. We mean ever ever.

“It would have been great had he come home (from Copenhagen) a winner,” Shipman wrote. “Great for all of us. But maybe not so much for him. Why? Because then he would have then [sic] really irked his critics.”

Ignoring the fact that his critics don’t need any new ammunition, the Good Morning America reporter added the coup de grâce:

“[Obama’s critics] already secretly and not so secretly peeved that he’s been voted the world’s prom king. Another victory would have just started a wave of dangerous, uncontrollable seething.”

Claire, honey, that’s the problem. We don’t want our President to be Prom King. We want him to be President. We want him to be feared as well as respected. He’s supposed to be the big man on earth, not the big man on campus.

By the way, was Barney Frank elected Prom Queen?

Source: TrueSlant.com

European protesters use mysterious chemical weapon against police

Then the farmers rolled out their big weapon, a well-endowed and fully-loaded Holstein named Bertha.

milk-protest

“After months of complaints by European dairy farmers angry over low prices,” the New York Times reports, “protesters in Brussels on Monday poured milk onto the streets, hurled eggs and other missiles, and started fires that filled the air with black smoke.”

Then the farmers rolled out their big weapon, a well-endowed and fully-loaded Holstein named Bertha.

Where’s PETA when you need them?

Source: New York Times

Uh-oh! Smartest White House Ever makes another diplomatic blunder

If the Bush White House had issued this press release, the left would have used it as proof that everyone in the administration was an idiot. Especially George Bush.

Anders Fogh Rasmussen. Or Lars Løkke Rasmussen. Or some other Rasmussen.
Anders Fogh Rasmussen. Or Lars Løkke Rasmussen. Or some other Rasmussen.

When the President flew into Copenhagen last week to save Chicago’s bid for the Olympics, he hastily added a few extra diplomatic tasks to his itinerary.

The White House followed long-standing procedure and issued a press release to let the media know the president’s schedule for the day.

If the Bush White House had issued this press release, the left would have used it as proof that everyone in the administration was an idiot. Especially George Bush. But we’ve yet to see that argument made about the Obama White House press release.

Here’s what the press release said:

The President will arrive in Copenhagen, Denmark in the morning. The arrival at Copenhagen Airport, Kastrup is open press.

The President and the First Lady will then travel to Christiansborg Palace. They will be greeted by HM Queen Margrethe II and HRH Prince Consort Henrik. There will be a travel pool spray. The President will meet Danish Prime Minister Anders Fogh Rasmussen. There will be a pool spray at the top of the meeting.

Don’t look now, Mr. President, but that the wrong Rasmussen. Lars Løkke Rasmussen is the Prime Minister of Denmark. Anders Fogh Rasmussen is Secretary-General of NATO.

But you know how it is. All those Danes look alike.

Source: HotAir.com

Green power proves underwhelming Down Under

At some point you have to start feeling sorry for the greens. No one wants their cars. No one wants their light bulbs. No one wants their taxes. And most of all, no one wants to be scammed by their government.

Turn out the lights, Perth. The green party's over.
Turn out the lights, Perth. The green party's over.

At some point you have to start feeling sorry for the greens. No one wants their cars. No one wants their light bulbs. No one wants their taxes. And most of all, no one wants to be scammed by their government.

The Sydney Morning Herald tells the story:

In a move that could cost the Federal Government’s GreenPower scheme public support, the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission has asked a state government agency and energy suppliers to stop telling customers that using GreenPower will ‘‘make a real difference’’ to the environment. Almost a million households now buy GreenPower, paying extra on their power bills to support renewable energy and shrink their carbon footprint.

But they will no longer be told it leads to ‘‘significant results for our environment’’.

Turns out the only thing that’s significant about green power is its cost.

Source: Sydney Morning Herald

Aussie TV shows man masturbating to photo of Obama. Chris Matthews to sue for plagiarism?

THE ABC is facing another barrage of public anger over a new TV show in which shock comedian John Safran simulates sex acts to an image of US President Barack Obama.

john safran masterbates to Obama

You have to hand it to the Aussies…no, that might not be an appropriate way to say it. Let’s try again.

The Aussies have added a stroke of realism…no, that wording won’t work, either. Let’s start over.

Who is this insane Aussie? Did they get some jerk off the street…no, we apologize. That seems inappropriate, too.

Aw, the hell with it. Here’s how the Herald-Sun newspaper describes the sordid situation:

THE ABC is facing another barrage of public anger over a new TV show in which shock comedian John Safran simulates sex acts to an image of US President Barack Obama.

The Australian Family Association described the show as “filth.” Spokesman John Morrissey said it would be the lowest point in Australia’s television history.
“It’s offensive and it’s in bad taste and it’s certainly not something that kids should be exposed to,” Mr Morrissey said.

Safran masturbates to the image of President Obama in a Palestinian sperm bank.

American cable TV host Chris Matthews may be considering a lawsuit demanding royalties from Safran.

“I invented masturbating to Obama and this guy is ripping me off,” the Hardball reportedly thought. “In fact, I’m feeling that thrill up my leg right now. This interview is over. Anyone know where the nearest men’s room is?”

Source: Andrew Bolt

Larry King attacks Limbaugh, Hannity, Beck for their low ratings. Which, by the way, dwarf his ratings.

Consider this a perfect example of the pot calling the kettle black Larry King being an idiot during an interview with Republican Congresswoman Michele Bachmann.

Consider this a perfect example of the pot calling the kettle black Larry King being an idiot during an interview with Republican Congresswoman Michele Bachmann.

King: Would you want the Limbaugh, that crowd — would you want them to be your voice as the Republican Party stands in this country?

Bachmann: Well remember it’s who the American people are referring to Larry. And the American people are looking to voices like Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, Mark Levin, Glenn Beck –

King: I just told you — it’s 2 percent of America. It’s 2 percent!

Senility is a terrible thing. Larry still thinks people watch his show.

Source: MofoPolitics.com

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