Jay Leno goes after ACORN, airs its new commercial
Jay Leno goes after ACORN, airs its new commercial
Category: Television
Wolf Blitzer goes on Jeopardy, answers the question “Is that guy really that stupid?”
CNN’s Wolf Blitzer appeared on Celebrity Jeopardy last night and proved once and for all that, yes, he is that stupid. The thin veneer of intellectual superiority was stripped away and the know-it-all Blitzer proved he knew nothing when he competed against actress Dana Delaney and comedian Andy Richter.
CNN’s Wolf Blitzer appeared on Celebrity Jeopardy last night and proved once and for all that, yes, he is that stupid.
The thin veneer of intellectual superiority was stripped away and the know-it-all Blitzer proved he knew nothing when he competed against actress Dana Delaney and comedian Andy Richter.
To be blunt, Blitzer sucked. He was an ignoramus. He embarrassed his friends, his family, his employers, short people, bearded people, and fellow clueless liberals.
Richter won the game with an incredible $68,000 total. Delaney racked up an creditable $9,300. But Wolf’s final score was -$4800. Yes, negative $4,800.
It’s very difficult for a Jeopardy contestant to come up enough wrong answers to go that far in the hole. It takes great effort and even greater ignorance.
Where’s that damn Teleprompter when it’s really needed?
Man bites dog! Jon Stewart turns on mainstream media!
“You mean to tell me that two kids from the cast of High School Musical III broke this story with a video camera and their grandmother’s chinchilla coat,” Stewart said, “and you’ve got nothing?”
ABC News anchor Charlie Gibson said the ACORN stings are better suited for “the cables,” but Jon Stewart disagrees.
“You mean to tell me that two kids from the cast of High School Musical III broke this story with a video camera and their grandmother’s chinchilla coat,” Stewart said, “and you’ve got nothing?”
What do you know. We agree with the smarmy, smirking Stewart for once.
Susan Boyle is doing the Rolling Stones. Their song, that is.
If you could have found a bookmaker willing to take the bet — which is doubtful — you could have made a fortune betting that Susan Boyle’s first song would be a 38-year old Rolling Stones classic.
If you could have found a bookmaker willing to take the bet — which is doubtful — you could have made a fortune betting that Susan Boyle’s first song would be a 38-year old Rolling Stones classic.
Consider this proof that Mick Jagger and Keith Richards are vastly underrated as songwriters.
Kanye West, who said, “Bush doesn’t care about black people,” doesn’t care about white people
The same idiot rapper who shocked America by announcing “Bush doesn’t care about black people” during a nationally-televised Hurricane Katrina charity event back in 2005, topped his long list of idiotic comments during the MTV Music Video Awards.
Kanye West made a fool of himself on national television last night. It’s getting to be a habit.
The same idiot rapper who shocked America by announcing “Bush doesn’t care about black people” during a nationally-televised Hurricane Katrina charity event back in 2005, topped his long list of idiotic comments during the MTV Music Video Awards.
Here’s what happened: Taylor Swift was graciously accepting the award for Best Female Video. She’d won the award over Beyonce, Kelly Clarkson and a couple other flavor-of-the-month performers whose names no one will remember a year from now.
As Taylor was thanking MTV, West ran on stage, took the microphone from Swift, and announced that Beyonce had been robbed.
“Beyonce had one of the best videos of all time,” he said about her “Single Ladies” video.
Swift, as you can imagine, was shocked. She stood silently, trophy in hand while West ranted. Cameras cut to the audience, where Beyonce looked equally stunned. MTV quickly cut to a commercial break.
Can we make a fool of ourselves on national television? Yes, we Kanye.
Source: Huffington Post
Noah Webster becomes official White House spokesman
It seemed for one brief moment on Sunday that White House spokesman Robert Gibbs was holding out the Olive Branch from President Obama when he said on CNN, “President Obama does not think opposition to him is racially motivated, a claim made in Maureen Dowd’s Sunday column.”
It seemed for one brief moment on Sunday that White House spokesman Robert Gibbs was holding out the Olive Branch from President Obama when he said on CNN, “President Obama does not think opposition to him is racially motivated, a claim made in Maureen Dowd’s Sunday column.”
If only Gibbs had stopped there. But CNN’s John King pushed for more and asked the press secretary about former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin.
“After playing a tape of Obama saying death panels are “a lie, plain and simple,” King asked, “Does the president believe that Sarah Palin is a liar?”
“Despite many media outlets saying that what former Governor Palin was saying wasn’t true, she continued to say it,” Gibbs responded. “I’ll let Webster define what one calls her. I think in the absence of fact… sometimes what happens is we fill the void with stuff that quite frankly isn’t true.” He said Obama helped fill that void in his speech Wednesday night.
It’s unfortunate, but not unsurprising, that King never thought to ask, “Why was the health care bill modified to remove end of life counseling if it could not be misconstrued as death panels?”
Let us fill in the void that Gibb’s answer would create “Ummmmmmmmmm.”
Source: Politico.com
– Written by Patrick Michael
Crowd chants “Glenn Beck” while CNN reporter gives live report at Washington, DC rally
Pity CNN reporter Lisa DesJardins. She drew the unenviable task of representing the left wing cable news network at Saturday’s massive right wing gathering in Washington, DC.
Pity CNN reporter Lisa DesJardins.
She drew the unenviable task of representing the left wing cable news network at Saturday’s massive right wing gathering in Washington, DC. The crowd let her know exactly what they think of her network’s “creative” reporting.
The highlight is when the crowd taunts CNN by repeatedly chanting the name “Glenn Beck” in honor of the former CNN host who has now become a huge ratings success at rival Fox News.
They also chanted “Tell the truth” and “No more lies,” much to the dismay of the frustrated DesJardins.
It’s beautiful to watch.
Bill Maher to Obama, “Hey! I’m not crazy!”
“Maher called the White House “cowards” for allowing Van Jones to resign following a series of right-wing attacks and for capitulating to those who complained about the nature of Obama’s back-to-school speech.”
Bill “This country is so stupid” Maher is mad — really mad — and taking the Obama administration to task.
“Maher called the White House “cowards” for allowing Van Jones to resign following a series of right-wing attacks and for capitulating to those who complained about the nature of Obama’s back-to-school speech.”
Maher defended his statement saying “The Democrats just never learn. Americans don’t really care which side of an issue you’re on as long as you don’t act like pussies.”
The Huffington Post said, “Maher then criticized Obama for trying to win over those who vehemently disagree with him, insisting that the president should instead ‘stand up for the 70 percent of Americans who aren’t crazy.'”
Any right wing publication who dared refer to Democrats as (and we quote) “cowards” or (quoting again) “pussies” would be vilified by the left wing press. But since we are quoting Bill Maher as quoted in a left wing publication, what can we say?
While we agree that “Democrats are cowards” who often “act like pussies,” we are baffled by his statement that Obama should stand up for the 70 percent of Americans who aren’t crazy.
We’re not sure what polls Bill is paying attention to, or who he considers “not crazy” but we are willing to bet that he considers himself part of the 70%.
Which is all the proof you need that Bill is actually part of the 30%.
Source: Huffington Post
– Written by Patrick Michael
“The Path to 9/11” – The film the Clintons (still) don’t want you to see.
“The Path to 9/11,” a two-part five-hour miniseries, aired only once on ABC in 2006, yet is still not available on DVD. Why? The series was a $40 million investment for the network which drew 25 million viewers and received seven Emmy nominations. So why wouldn’t the network want to recoup its investment?
“The Path to 9/11,” a two-part five-hour miniseries, aired only once on ABC in 2006, yet is still not available on DVD.
Why? The series was a $40 million investment for the network which drew 25 million viewers and received seven Emmy nominations. So why wouldn’t the network want to recoup its investment?
The suppression and censorship appear to be due to pure politics and legacy-protection, primarily on behalf of the Clintons, although neither Bill Clinton nor George W. Bush came off in a particularly heroic light in the film.
As The Los Angeles Times reported in 2007, “the miniseries’ writer, Cyrus Nowrasteh, believes it’s crystal clear: Powerful forces are out to protect Bill Clinton’s presidential legacy and shield Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton (D-N.Y.) from any potential collateral damage in her bid for the White House.
“Nowrasteh, also one of the miniseries’ many producers, said he was told by a top executive at ABC Studios that ‘if Hillary weren’t running for president, this wouldn’t be a problem.'”
Perhaps Hillary is still holding out hopes for the nomination in 2012. Otherwise this film certainly ought to be available by now.
Source: Los Angeles Times
It’s not easy to be both smug and dumb, but Rachel Maddow somehow manages to pull it off
Six months ago, had you attempted to tell us that Rachel Maddow could become even more smug and annoying, we would have said it was impossible. We were wrong.
Six months ago, had you attempted to tell us that Rachel Maddow could become even more smug and annoying, we would have said it was impossible.
We were wrong.
Alternate TV Guide: What the hell else is on TV tonight while Obama drones on endlessly about healthcare?
ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, Fox News, Fox Business, and MSBNC are all interrupting their regular broadcasting schedule to air Barack Obama’s 112th healthcare speech, but do not despair. They always said we’d have unlimited options when we had 500 TV channels and that dream is finally being fulfilled.
You may have read that Fox is the only major TV network not carrying President Obama’s address to a Joint Session of Congress tonight at 8 p.m. EST.
Although Fox is opting to air its hit show “So You Think You Can Dance,” Obama-TV will seemingly be everywhere else.
ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, Fox News, Fox Business, and MSBNC are all interrupting their regular broadcasting schedule to air Barack Obama’s 112th healthcare speech, but do not despair. They always said we’d have unlimited options when we had 500 TV channels and that dream is finally being fulfilled.
Alternate, non-Obama programming is as near as your remote control. Here are a few programs that look interesting to us:
-
Fox – So You Think You Can Dance
BBC – Kitchen Nightmares
CW – America’s Next Top Model
A&E – Dog the Bounty Hunter
Animal Planet – Untamed & Uncut
BET – Nora’s Hair Salon
Bravo – Top Chef: Las Vegas
ESPN – Major League baseball
MTV – Pranked
Discovery – MythBusters
TLC – Lottery Changed My Life
Travel – Extreme Megastructures
Enjoy. And pray that the program on Animal Planet isn’t really about the provision of ObamaCare that requires circumcisions for all newborn boys.
Glenn Beck asks “Who is Beau Friedlander and why is he saying these terrible things about me?”
“Why is he saying those terrible things?” is the easy part. Left wing lunatics just don’t like you, Glenn. The tougher question is, “Who the hell is Beau Friedlander?”
“Why is he saying those terrible things?” is the easy part. Left wing lunatics just don’t like you, Glenn. The tougher question is, “Who the hell is Beau Friedlander?”
Turns out Beau (apparently his real name) is the editor-in-chief of Air America. We were shocked when he wrote an article in the Huffington Post demanding that Fox News fire Glenn Beck.
Don’t get us wrong. We weren’t shocked that he wrote the article. No. We were shocked to find out that Air America is still in operation.
It seems that Beau was hired by Air America to bring their internet-based reporting up to the level of a really bad Jerry Springer episode. Beau, to his credit is trying, first demanding that everyone forego Fox News or be branded un-American. Then, saving his liberal funniest for last, remarking that Van Jones is no more communist than (wait for it)…Glenn Beck.
That got us scrambling (in vain, it seems) for Glenn Beck’s admission of being a communist. Maybe Beau can get a copy of Glenn Beck’s confession from Dan Rather or better yet, maybe Air America can hire Dan and they can work together on stories.
To study Beau at work, and to see the sophisticated methods that Air America utilizes to determine which stories are the most timely and important, watch the embedded video.
Source: HuffingtonPost.com
Written by Patrick Michael
That settles it: O’Reilly declares ObamaCare unconstitutional
Bill O’Reilly, the Ultimate Authority On Everything, has declared that ObamaCare is unconstitutional. Megyn Kelly and Lis Wiehl were discussing the issue when O’Reilly issued his verdict that under the commerce clause of the Constitution, the government can’t force you to buy anything.
If you ever had any question about the legality of ObamaCare, it’s been settled by the Chief Justice of the Cable News Supreme Court.
Bill O’Reilly, the Ultimate Authority On Everything, has declared that ObamaCare is unconstitutional. Megyn Kelly and Lis Wiehl were discussing the issue when O’Reilly issued his verdict that under the commerce clause of the Constitution, the government can’t force you to buy anything.
We really want to like O’Reilly, but he’s just so damned smug. Even when we agree with the guy, we feel a little bad admitting it.
By the way, the word of the day is “smug.” Look it up.
TV newsman stung by bee, starts screaming obscenities
This is the kind of media we love. Veteran reporter Ron Wood of WSYR-TV in Syracuse, New York was stung by a bee right in the middle of a report, causing him to let loose with a string of obscenities. Careful, Ron, the FCC is watching.
This is the kind of media we love. Veteran reporter Ron Wood of WSYR-TV in Syracuse, New York was stung by a bee right in the middle of a report, causing him to let loose with a string of obscenities. Careful, Ron, the FCC is watching.
WARNING: Not for sensitive ears.
Something strange for a Friday: 1980 Beach Boys interview on Good Morning America
Someone at Good Morning, America had the bright idea of interviewing the Beach Boys. But no one bothered to find out what kind of drugs Dennis Wilson had been taking the night before. Or maybe even that morning.
Someone at Good Morning, America had the bright idea of interviewing the Beach Boys. But no one bothered to find out what kind of drugs Dennis Wilson had been taking the night before. Or maybe even that morning.
The funniest part is how the rest of the Beach Boys attempt to complete the interview as if they don’t notice that Dennis was completely whacked out.
We’re not religious, but we pray to God that Dick Morris is right for once
We’re not the biggest Dick Morris fans. Nevertheless, Morris appeared on the Sean Hannity televison show the other night and predicted that democrats could lose up to 100 Congressional seats next year.
We’re not the biggest Dick Morris fans. We just have a sense that if we looked back at all this guru’s predictions, they’d be correct about as often as Haley’s Comet swings by this part of the universe.
Nevertheless, Morris appeared on the Sean Hannity televison show the other night and predicted that democrats could lose up to 100 Congressional seats next year.
Dear God: If you let Dick Morris be right about this one prediction, we swear we’ll never skip church again. And if you’re in a generous mood, please let Courtney Friel have her own show on Fox. Amen.
H/T: BluegrassPundit.com
Major programming shift: Cow’s vagina replaces CNN’s normal line-up of horses’ asses
First time we saw this video, we thought it was Wolf Blitzer. False alarm. Turns out it’s a cow giving birth. For some reason, CNN decided to show this video clip of reporter Deborah Feyerick helping a calf be born. We can’t explain it.
First time we saw this video, we thought it was Wolf Blitzer. False alarm. Turns out it’s a cow giving birth.
For some reason, CNN decided to show this video clip of reporter Deborah Feyerick helping a calf be born.
We can’t explain it.
Fox News kills competition, Glenn Beck’s ratings make mockery of boycott
Beck’s ratings are higher than ever. Remarkably, his show doesn’t run during primetime, yet his audience is larger than every prime time on every cable news network except Fox News’ O’Reilly-Hannity tandem. How long until Fox moves him into a more prominent time slot? And who will go to make room for him?
If President Obama’s henchmen are organizing a boycott of Glenn Beck, the ratings show that no one’s paying attention.
Beck’s ratings are higher than ever. Remarkably, his show doesn’t run during primetime, yet his audience is larger than every prime time on every cable news network except Fox News’ O’Reilly-Hannity tandem.
How long until Fox moves him into a more prominent time slot? And who will go or move to make room for him?
| Network | Program | Total Audience |
|---|---|---|
| Fox News | O’Reilly | 3,440,000 |
| Fox News | Hannity | 2,937,000 |
| Fox News | Beck | 2,810,000 |
| Fox News | Greta | 2,450,000 |
| Fox News | Baier | 2,066,000 |
| Fox News | Smith | 1,860,000 |
| MSNBC | Olbermann | 1,114,000 |
| CNN | King | 1,063,000 |
| MSNBC | Maddow | 885,000 |
| CNN | Cooper | 827,000 |
| MSNBC | Hardball | 640,000 |
Source: MediaBistro.com
“All Barack Channel” (ABC) refuses to air TV anti-ObamaCare commercial
ABC-TV has refused to run this anti-ObamaCare television commercial despite the fact that it’s running on other TV stations across the country. Take a look and we think you’ll agree there’s nothing objectionable about it. Unless, of course, you disagree with what it says.
ABC-TV has refused to run this anti-ObamaCare television commercial despite the fact that it’s running on other TV stations across the country. Take a look and we think you’ll agree there’s nothing objectionable about it. Unless, of course, you disagree with what it says.
Of course, this is the same magnanimous television network that turned an entire night of its valuable primetime programming over to the President a few weeks ago so he could hype his socialized medicine scheme.
Turning down a commercial is an especially puzzling decision since network television rating and revenues have slumped substantially. Money be money. Yet ABC declined to take the income it would have earned by running the commercial produced by the League of American Voters.
Where’s that damn Fairness Doctrine you we need it?
Source: LivingLakeCountry.com
Fox News ratings in stratosphere, now second highest rated of all cable networks
Fox News left its cable news competitors in the dust long ago. Now the network has its sights set on a prize that even Rupert Murdoch would have once thought impossible – number one ratings among all cable networks.
Fox News left its cable news competitors in the dust long ago. Now the network has its sights set on a prize that even Rupert Murdoch would have once thought impossible – number one ratings among all cable networks.
Here’s how MediaBistro.com describes the situation:
Last week we reported on Fox News Channel’s primetime programs putting up huge numbers — three nights in a row beating CNN, MSNBC, CNBC and HLN combined in both Total Viewers and the A25-54 demo.
Well now the cable news rankings are out and Fox News was the second most-watched basic cable channel in primetime last week, only behind USA. FNC was 5th overall in Total Day viewership.
MSNBC was 24th in primetime and 32nd in Total Day. CNN ranked 26th in prime and 23rd in Total Day.
That sound you hear is Keith Olbermann whimpering over in the corner.
See last week’s article: O’Reilly-Hannity-Beck go 1-2-3 in cable news ratings again, Fox destroys competition again.
Source: MediaBistro.com
Farrah Fawcett creates new Six Million Dollar Man
Make no mistake about it, no matter how much Redmond inherited, there’s only one Six Million Dollar Man and that’s Fawcett’s former husband Lee Majors.
England’s Daily Mail reports that actress Farrah Fawcett left her $6,000,000 estate to her troubled 24-year-old son Redmond O’Neal.
Make no mistake about it, no matter how much Redmond inherited, there’s only one Six Million Dollar Man and that’s Fawcett’s former husband Lee Majors.
Source: Daily Mail
CNN’s new strategy: “Hey, nobody watches us so let’s attack the people they do watch.”
Ratings-challenged Campbell Brown reported on the feud between Bill O’Reilly and Keith Olbermann and actually mentioned that their ratings handily top hers.
CNN has fallen to a miserable third in the cable news ratings and they seem to have adopted a very strange strategy to win viewers back: Reporting how they’re getting their asses kicked.
Ratings-challenged Campbell Brown reported on the feud between Bill O’Reilly and Keith Olbermann and actually mentioned the fact that their ratings handily top hers. (She neglected to mention Nancy Grace’s program on HLN also hands Campbell her ass on a platter during the 8 p.m. hour.)
Continue reading “CNN’s new strategy: “Hey, nobody watches us so let’s attack the people they do watch.””
O’Reilly-Hannity-Beck go 1-2-3 in cable news ratings again, Fox destroys competition again
All Fox News hosts have higher ratings than all their competitors combined, including CNN and MSNBC. Data for August 10, 2009.
If you’re not on Fox, your ratings picture is pretty grim. All Fox hosts have higher ratings than all their competitors combined. Here’s what it looked like on the night of August 10.
We call your attention to the Glenn Beck ratings. Considering his time slot is during work and drive-home hours for the vast majority of America, his numbers are astounding. Perhaps a rearrangement of the Fox News line-up is in order.
| Network | Program | Total Audience |
|---|---|---|
| Fox News | O’Reilly | 3,814,000 |
| Fox News | Hannity | 3,118,000 |
| Fox News | Beck | 2,417,000 |
| Fox News | Greta | 2,388,000 |
| Fox News | Baier | 1,988,000 |
| Fox News | Shep | 1,833,000 |
| MSNBC | Olbermann | 1,243,000 |
| MSNBC | Maddow | 1,082,000 |
| CNNHN | Grace | 875,000 |
| CNN | Griffin | 810,000 |
C-SPAN caller hates the media. Who can blame her?
Leah, a C-SPAN caller from New Hampshire, came on the air saying that she “just wants to clarify a few things about these manufactured angered crowds.”
Not much commentary necessary here. We’ll just let Leah, a C-SPAN caller from New Hampshire, tell you what’s what.
She came on the air saying that she “just wants to clarify a few things about these manufactured angered crowds.” Politico reporter Manu Raju and C-SPAN’s Rob Harrell undoubtedly thought they were going to hear from a disgruntled Democrat.
Instead, Leah took them to school.
H/T: HotAir.com
Sneak preview of new Hollywood thriller called “President Humpy Saves the World”
Here’s Kimmel’s concept of how Hollywood might handle its version of the “President-Clinton-rescues-two-reporters” story.
Jimmy Kimmel gets less hype than Conan O’Brien and David Letterman, but night-in and night-out, he’s by far the funniest of the three late night hosts.
Here’s Kimmel’s concept of how Hollywood might handle its version of the “President-Clinton-rescues-two-reporters” story.
Thanks, Jimmy. We couldn’t have said it better ourselves.
(Actually, we couldn’t have said it nearly as well, but by saying “we couldn’t have said it better” we subconsciously elevate ourselves to Kimmel’s level in your mind. At least that’s our theory. How’s it working?)
