Category: Television

And so it begins: Fox Business Network gets first ratings win over CNBC thanks to Imus

Irrascable, almost unwatchable curmudgeon Don Imus has helped the Fox Business Network rack up its first ratings triumph over arch rival CNBC.

If there was ever been a face made for radio, it's the one belonging to Don Imus.
If there was ever been a face made for radio, it's the one belonging to Don Imus.

Irrascable, almost unwatchable curmudgeon Don Imus has helped the Fox Business Network rack up its first ratings triumph over arch rival CNBC.

Imus’ radio show, a simulcast of his radio show, averaged 148,000 viewers a day for the week of October 5. That allowed FBN to eke out its first narrow victory over CNBC since FBN fired up its transmitter two years ago.

The New York Daily News reports:

Imus retained about 75% of his audience for the period, and helped propel Fox Business to its highest overall ratings for a week.

Imus’ total viewership on Fox was several times the average of his last simulcast, on the RFD network, and a little less than half the number he averaged when he was on MSNBC.

Fox Business News or Joe Kernan and crew at CNBC? Joe Kernan and crew at CNBC or Fox Business News. We just can’t decide.

We admit it. We’re torn between two lovers, feelin’ like a fool. Lovin’ both of you is breakin’ all the rules.

Sorry, we momentarily channeled Maureen McGovern and her 1976 hit.

Source: New York Daily News

NBC cancels series before it deserves it, Obama gets Nobel prize before deserving it. It’s just that kind of day.

It was a very weird, but very consistent day. At the same time NBC has cancelled “Southland” before it ever aired, Barack Obama was given a Nobel Peace Prize prior to accomplishing anything to deserve it.

Southland didn't deserve what it got. Neither did Barack Obama.
Southland didn't deserve what it got. Neither did Barack Obama.

It was a very weird, but very consistent day. At the same time NBC has cancelled “Southland” before it ever aired, Barack Obama was given a Nobel Peace Prize prior to accomplishing anything to deserve it.

Jay Leno’s comment on the cancellation story was, “NBC’s ratings aren’t so hot. In fact — and this is true — this week the network canceled the show ‘Southland’ before it even came back on the air. Next thing you know they’ll be canceling shows before writers can even think of them.”

Had Leno done a Nobel Peace Prize version it would have said, “Barack Obama’s approval ratings aren’t so hot. In fact – and this is true – today the Nobel committee gave the President the Nobel Peace Prize before he’s actually accomplished anything. Next thing you know they’ll be giving Presidents awards before they’re even elected.”

What’s that? Obama was nominated two weeks prior to his inauguration? So the prize couldn’t possibly be based on anything he’s done? Hmmmm.

Congratulations, President Obama. We’re sure you’re proud to be take your place alongside other peaceful men like Yassar Arafat.

Source: Live Feed

CNN on the outside looking in, reports on White House dispute with Fox News

Just try, if you can, to imagine the chagrin suffered by CNN when it has to report a story about Fox News. Even worse, imagine its complete humiliation when it has to stage group discussions about Fox.

Just try, if you can, to imagine the chagrin suffered by CNN when it has to report a story about Fox News. Even worse, imagine its complete humiliation when it has to stage group discussions about Fox.

For example, when the White House declares Fox News to be the enemy. Then imagine the entire panel agreeing with David Gergen and saying that Obama’s attack on Fox News “is a risky strategy and it’s not one I would advocate.”

Luckily, CNN’s embarrassment will be minimized by the fact that no one saw the discussion because all the network’s former viewers now watch Fox.

Source: HotAir.com

Stop global warming by scaring the hell out of children

The British government is upset that voters aren’t buying into the global warming scam. It’s solution? Scare the hell out of British children.

The British government is upset that voters aren’t buying into the global warming scam. It’s solution? Scare the hell out of British children.

Source: Tim Blair

Bill Maher wants to be taken seriously. Seriously.

Bill Maher wants President Obama to repeal “don’t ask, don’t tell” regulations just to drive the right wing crazy.

bill-maher Bill Maher wants President Obama to repeal “don’t ask, don’t tell” regulations just to drive the right wing crazy.

But who are we to paraphrase Maher’s brilliance. Let’s have him explain it in his own words:

“Because here’s the thing about today’s conservatives: They’re not bright. They can’t keep a lot of ideas in their head at once. And by ‘a lot’ I mean ‘two.’ If we can get them all worked up about fighting the gay menace, it will siphon away all that crazy, right wing, town-hall energy from all the other big issues they’ve been fighting.”

Then Bill went what we politely refer to as totally off the deep end.

“Health care and the environment are complicated, but it’s not hard to keep track of the places that God allows you to put your pee-pee. I mean, you can count those places on one hand. And that hand isn’t something you should be using either. A year ago, if you had asked your average wing-nut neighbor what he thought about health care reform, he would have shrugged his shoulders and gone right back to eating his Moon Pie. But he’s pissed-off about it now, why? Because it’s in their nature to be pissed-off. They have a pre-existing condition called the Conniption Fits. The tea-baggers have taught us all an important lesson in modern politics: If you want to be taken seriously, act like a fucking loony-tune.”

Under the circumstances, Bill, we take you very, very seriously.

Source: HuffingtonPost.com

– Written by Patrick Michael

Welcome to “How Will He Die?” the Hamas mascot death watch guessing game

“Pioneers of Tomorrow” is a sick, sick Hamas TV program for kids. Over the years, it’s starred a series of cute Disney-esque characters who teach Palestinian children about the glory of killing Jews and dying for Islam in the process.

“Pioneers of Tomorrow” is a sick, sick Hamas TV program for kids. Over the years, it’s starred a series of cute Disney-esque characters who teach Palestinian children about the glory of killing Jews and dying for Islam in the process.

Those cute, cuddly hosts always end up dying for their “noble” cause. (We’ve always hated Mighty Mouse and wished he would have met an untimely end, but we digress.)

Some unknown wit has put together this montage called “How Will He Die?” that lets you guess how each of the unfortunate characters went to meet his maker (and, we assume, 49 cute, furry virgins).

Also see our previous article, Moderate Muslim Mickey Mouse brutally murdered
by evil Jew.

Source: Tim Blair

Chris Matthews guest delivers news MSNBC host doesn’t want to hear

Poor Chris Matthews. Poor, poor Chris Matthews. The MSNBC host is bitterly clinging to the results of a new poll that show President Obama’s approval numbers roaring back to life.

Poor Chris Matthews. Poor, poor Chris Matthews.

The MSNBC host is bitterly clinging to the results of a new poll that show President Obama’s approval numbers roaring back to life.

Of course, Matthews attributes The One’s sinking fortunes to “all the crazy stuff of the summer.” You know, crazy stuff like “the tea parties, the birthers, the nutbags out there.”

Unfortunately, guests Charlie Cook of the Cook Political Report and John Harris of the Politico weren’t so eager to agree with Matthews assessment of the situation. It was their unenviable task to tell Matthews that the pole he cited was an outlier and inconsistent with all the other polls.

For the first time in recent memory, Matthews was almost stunned into silence. Which would have almost made his show watchable.

Source: NewsBuster.org

ABC reporter anoints Obama “the world’s prom king”

ABC News correspondent Claire Shipman may have given President Obama the silliest endorsement ever. And to paraphrase Whoopi Goldberg, we don’t just mean ever. We mean ever ever.

Claire Shipman dreaming that the Prom King asks her to dance
Claire Shipman dreaming that the Prom King asks her to dance

ABC News correspondent Claire Shipman may have given President Obama the silliest endorsement ever. And to paraphrase Whoopi Goldberg, we don’t just mean ever. We mean ever ever.

“It would have been great had he come home (from Copenhagen) a winner,” Shipman wrote. “Great for all of us. But maybe not so much for him. Why? Because then he would have then [sic] really irked his critics.”

Ignoring the fact that his critics don’t need any new ammunition, the Good Morning America reporter added the coup de grâce:

“[Obama’s critics] already secretly and not so secretly peeved that he’s been voted the world’s prom king. Another victory would have just started a wave of dangerous, uncontrollable seething.”

Claire, honey, that’s the problem. We don’t want our President to be Prom King. We want him to be President. We want him to be feared as well as respected. He’s supposed to be the big man on earth, not the big man on campus.

By the way, was Barney Frank elected Prom Queen?

Source: TrueSlant.com

Aussie TV shows man masturbating to photo of Obama. Chris Matthews to sue for plagiarism?

THE ABC is facing another barrage of public anger over a new TV show in which shock comedian John Safran simulates sex acts to an image of US President Barack Obama.

john safran masterbates to Obama

You have to hand it to the Aussies…no, that might not be an appropriate way to say it. Let’s try again.

The Aussies have added a stroke of realism…no, that wording won’t work, either. Let’s start over.

Who is this insane Aussie? Did they get some jerk off the street…no, we apologize. That seems inappropriate, too.

Aw, the hell with it. Here’s how the Herald-Sun newspaper describes the sordid situation:

THE ABC is facing another barrage of public anger over a new TV show in which shock comedian John Safran simulates sex acts to an image of US President Barack Obama.

The Australian Family Association described the show as “filth.” Spokesman John Morrissey said it would be the lowest point in Australia’s television history.
“It’s offensive and it’s in bad taste and it’s certainly not something that kids should be exposed to,” Mr Morrissey said.

Safran masturbates to the image of President Obama in a Palestinian sperm bank.

American cable TV host Chris Matthews may be considering a lawsuit demanding royalties from Safran.

“I invented masturbating to Obama and this guy is ripping me off,” the Hardball reportedly thought. “In fact, I’m feeling that thrill up my leg right now. This interview is over. Anyone know where the nearest men’s room is?”

Source: Andrew Bolt

Larry King attacks Limbaugh, Hannity, Beck for their low ratings. Which, by the way, dwarf his ratings.

Consider this a perfect example of the pot calling the kettle black Larry King being an idiot during an interview with Republican Congresswoman Michele Bachmann.

Consider this a perfect example of the pot calling the kettle black Larry King being an idiot during an interview with Republican Congresswoman Michele Bachmann.

King: Would you want the Limbaugh, that crowd — would you want them to be your voice as the Republican Party stands in this country?

Bachmann: Well remember it’s who the American people are referring to Larry. And the American people are looking to voices like Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, Mark Levin, Glenn Beck –

King: I just told you — it’s 2 percent of America. It’s 2 percent!

Senility is a terrible thing. Larry still thinks people watch his show.

Source: MofoPolitics.com

Levi Johnston hawks his nuts in another 15 seconds of fame

We played with several angles on this story of Levi Johnston hawking his nuts and joking about knocking up Bristol Palin in a new commercial, but just weren’t sure which way to take it.

We played with several angles on this story of Levi Johnston hawking his nuts and joking about knocking up Bristol Palin in a new commercial, but just weren’t sure which way to take it. So let’s see how you would write it up, in a comment below.

White House: Don’t blame Safe School Czar for hiding pedophilia from authorities. Blame Fox News.

Kevin Jennings, Obama’s Safe Schools Czar, heaped praise on Harry Hay, the founder of NAMBLA (the National Man/Boy Love Association). He also declined to report a statutory rape to authorities.

Slimier and slimier.

Kevin Jennings, Obama’s Safe Schools Czar, heaped praise on Harry Hay, the founder of NAMBLA (the National Man/Boy Love Association). He also declined to report a statutory rape to authorities.

Is poor judgment to blame? No. Temporary insanity? No. White house Press Secretary Robert Gibbs says the latest White House scandal is the fault of…get ready…here it comes…Fox News.

“Its a shame,” Gibbs said with despair. “I hope people watch what they (FOX News) do.”

For once, Mr. Gibbs, we agree with you. It’ll be a pity if people don’t watch Fox News coverage of this story.

Source: Gateway Pundit

Cokie Roberts speaks the unspeakable about Roman Polanski, “Just take him out and shoot him.”

Can’t disagree with ABC’s Cokie Roberts when she says, “He raped and drugged and raped and sodomized a child.” Also can’t disagree when she says, ”Just take him out and shoot him.”

Can’t disagree with ABC’s Cokie Roberts when she says, “He raped and drugged and raped and sodomized a child.” Also can’t disagree when she says, ”Just take him out and shoot him.”

But, Cokie, dear, this is no way to ingratiate yourself with network television executives.

Source: Breitbart.com

Adios, amigos. MSNBC’s Schultz and Maddow losing viewers

MSNBC executives must be sweating bullets. Last quarter was a for the also-ran lefty network, and last week was even worse.

Why is this man smiling? He must not have seen last week's ratings.
Why is this man smiling? He must not have seen last week's ratings.

MSNBC executives must be sweating bullets. Last quarter was a ratings disaster for the also-ran lefty network, and last week was even worse.

For the first time since her premiere last September, Rachel Maddow failed to top 1,000,000 viewers all five nights of the week.

And Ed Schultz. Poor Ed Schultz. After his disappointing premiere back in April, networks executives reassured worried advertisers that his ratings would grow. In reality, they’ve actually become more abysmal. Last week the bombastic buffoon’s total audience fell under 500,000 viewers three of the five nights.

Maddow has a bit of an excuse because Keith Olbermann wasn’t around as a lead-in to her show. But she’s been able to top that magic million mark during previous Olbermann absences.

Meanwhile, O’Reilly, Hannity and Beck have turned Fox News into the 1927 Yankees of cable news.

That sound you hear is the gnashing of teeth emanating from MSNBC’s executive suites.

Source: Nielsen Media Research via MediaBistro

12 things you probably don’t know about the latest cable news ratings

The third quarter isn’t quite over on the calendar, but it’s over in the world of ratings. Fox may have a lot to celebrate, but everyone else is wondering what the hell hit them.

CNN must be kicking themselves for letting Glenn Beck get away.
CNN must be kicking themselves for letting Glenn Beck get away.

The third quarter isn’t quite over on the calendar, but it’s over in the world of ratings. Fox has a lot to celebrate, but everyone else is wondering what the hell hit them. Here are a dozen things that may surprise you about the latest cable news ratings.

1. A perfect ten. All ten of the top ten shows are on Fox News, powered by the O’Reilly-Hannity-Beck troika.

2. Beck kicks butt. Glenn Beck increased the ratings for his time slot a remarkable 136% over the third quarter of 2008.

3. Lucky 13. During September, Fox had the top thirteen programs in cable news.

4. Dominance. The O’Reilly Factor has now been the top-rated cable news show for an unprecedented 106 consecutive months.

5. Better and better. Fox News is the only cable news network to post across the board year-over-year increases.

Continue reading “12 things you probably don’t know about the latest cable news ratings”

Good news for Roman Polanski: Whoopi Goldberg says he may be guilty of rape, but it wasn’t rape rape

“I know it wasn’t rape rape. It was something else, but I don’t believe it was rape rape … When we’re talking about what someone did, and what they were charged with, we have to say what it actually was, not what we think it was.”

“I know it wasn’t rape rape. It was something else, but I don’t believe it was rape rape … When we’re talking about what someone did, and what they were charged with, we have to say what it actually was, not what we think it was.”

In related news, we believe Whoopi is a moron, but not moron moron.

Is the right wing conspiracy vast or just half vast?

NBC was unable to book the Greatest President In History for consecutive appearances on Meet the Press. So they went with Bill Clinton who reassured the left that there won’t be a repeat of the ’94 Democrat debacle.

NBC was unable to book the Greatest President In History for consecutive appearances on Meet the Press. So they went with Bill Clinton who reassured the left that there won’t be a repeat of the ’94 Democrat debacle.

“There’s no way they can make it that bad,” Clinton said. “The Democrats haven’t taken on the gun lobby like I did and they took 15 of our members out. So I don’t think, it’ll be, whatever happens, it’ll be manageable for the president.”

After speaking of the weakness of the current Republican party, Clinton was asked if the vast right wing conspiracy that took him down still exists. “Oh, you bet,” said Clinton. “Sure it is. It’s not as strong as it was, because America has changed demographically, but it’s as virulent as it was.”

So the vast right wing conspiracy still exists?

Wonder if she still has that blue dress.

Source: HuffingtonPost.com

– Written by Patrick Michael

Hugo Chavez hates Fox News, says their “minds are filled with confusions”

Hugo Chavez hates Fox News, says their “minds are filled with confusions.” Congratulations, Fox. You know you’re doing something right when you’re loathed by a bombastic Communist dictator.

Congratulations, Fox. You know you’re doing something right when you’re loathed by a bombastic Communist dictator.

Officially debunking the myth of British TV programming superiority

Saturday morning at 9 a.m. BBC America aired a program titled, “You Are What You Eat. It was described as the story of “a businsessman whose diet of meat, chocolate and milk has lead to 130 extra pounds and a flatulence problem.“

Saturday morning at 9 a.m. BBC America aired a program titled, “You Are What You Eat. It was described as the story of “a businsessman whose diet of meat, chocolate and milk has lead to 130 extra pounds and a flatulence problem.“

Please consider the myth of British superiority officially debunked.

And the Lord Media sayeth unto the masses, “Worship me, for I am the one true God”

Imagine that you’re speaking in front of a room packed with people who had paid their hard-earned money to hear what you had to say. Now imagine that a couple TV networks decided that they should do live reports from that room while you’re speaking.

Here’s proof that arrogance is in the media’s DNA.

Imagine that you’re speaking in front of a room packed with people who had paid their hard-earned money to hear what you had to say. Now imagine that a couple TV networks decided that they should do live reports from that room while you’re speaking.

That’s exactly what happened at this week’s Values Voters Summit. MSNBC and Fox sent reporters to event and they both somehow got the impression that they were the story.

When people interrupted the live broadcasts to ask the reporters to quiet down and show a little respect for the speakers, the reporters were offended. As were the anchors.

Yup, we hate the media. The left wing media and the right wing media.

Source: HotAir.com

Today Show won’t talk about ACORN, but tracks down ex-neighbor to about the Yale killer

The Today Show can’t find time to report on the ACORN scandal, but manages to track down and interview – get this – the ex-neighbor of suspected Yale killer Raymond Clark.


Sometimes there just aren’t enough hours in the day. For example, the Today Show can’t find time to report on the ACORN scandal, but manages to track down and interview – get this – the ex-neighbor of suspected Yale killer Raymond Clark.

Turns out the woman didn’t really know Raymond Clark. But she knows he had dogs. And he tried to stare her down. And he yelled at her kids once. And he was controlling with his girlfriend. And stuff. But that doesn’t mean he’s guilty or anything.

By the end of this idiotic interview, Viera looks as if she’d give anything for the chance to talk about ACORN’s pimps and prostitutes.

Source: Hippo’s Ass

The Obaminable Showman

The One now believes he is The Only One who can save his floundering socialist healthcare plan. So he showed up on five networks — ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN plus Spanish-language Univision — on Sunday to pitch his leftist heart out.

Barack Obama, The Obainable Showman

The One now believes he is The Only One who can save his floundering socialist healthcare plan. So he showed up on five networks — ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN plus Spanish-language Univision — on Sunday to pitch his leftist heart out.

Of course, the Greatest President In History did not appear on Fox Sunday, automatically eliminating himself for consideration for any future sequels to Profiles In Courage. In search of more friendly climes, he will continue his Talking Tour 2009 on Monday’s David Letterman Show.

According to Martha Joynt Kumar, a political scientist at Towson University in Maryland, Barack Obama has been one very busy President. Oh, not busy doing the actual work of a President, but busy talking. Always talking. By the time the sun sets on Sunday, he will have done 124 separate interviews during his short presidency. One hundred twenty-four.

In contrast, George Bush had done only 40 interviews and Bill Clinton had done 46 at this same point in their presidencies.

We hope ObamaCare covers Presidential Appearance Fatigue Syndrome (PAFS), because we are really getting tired of seeing this guy on televison.

The year’s most unsurprising research: Almost no one trusts the press

The public’s assessment of the accuracy of news stories is now at its lowest level in more than two decades of Pew Research surveys, and Americans’ views of media bias and independence now match previous lows.

pew-research-americans-dont-trust-media

As a result of it’s latest survey, Pew Research concludes that Americans don’t trust the press. Not exactly a man bites dog story.

Here’s how Pew reports it:

The public’s assessment of the accuracy of news stories is now at its lowest level in more than two decades of Pew Research surveys, and Americans’ views of media bias and independence now match previous lows.

Just 29% of Americans say that news organizations generally get the facts straight, while 63% say that news stories are often inaccurate. In the initial survey in this series about the news media’s performance in 1985, 55% said news stories were accurate while 34% said they were inaccurate. That percentage had fallen sharply by the late 1990s and has remained low over the last decade.

Similarly, only about a quarter (26%) now say that news organizations are careful that their reporting is not politically biased, compared with 60% who say news organizations are politically biased. And the percentages saying that news organizations are independent of powerful people and organizations (20%) or are willing to admit their mistakes (21%) now also match all-time lows.

Where’s Dan Rather when we need him?

Source: Pew Research Center

I HATE THE MEDIA ™
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