Author: editor

Hillary presses “restart” button with Russians, restarts Khruschev era

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhXwcn3BksA America voted for hope and change. We just hope they like the change they’re getting.

According to CNN, the Russian government just announced that they may base long-range bombers in Cuba for the first time since the 1962 Cuban Missle Crisis.

When Secretary of State Hillary Clinton presented her Russian counterpart with a special “Restart” button this week, he apparently took it as a sign his government could restart the Cold War.

Next thing you know, Vladimir Putin will channel Nikita Khruschev, show up at the United Nations, start pounding his shoe on the podium, and threaten to bury us.

You really need to upgrade your hiring process, President Obama. Next time you need a Secretary of State, may we suggest Craig’s List?

Vile cripple Larry Flynt claims he’s had more women than vile stroke-victim Hugh Hefner

larry flint tmz videoIn a battle between a vile hardcore porn publisher and a vile softcore porn publisher, wheelchair-bound Larry Flynt claims he’s had more women than Hugh Hefner. “

To tell the truth, we don’t care about either of these guys. They’re both living in the past.

But based on longevity, we’d give the nod to Hefner. As far as we can tell, the guy invented sex and most of the primary positions associated with it. He’s been doing it since dinosaurs roamed the earth. He drew the first centerfolds on the wall of a cave. The first issue of Playboy was a big seller in Sodom and Gomorrah.

This video shows just how wacky Flynt is. The TMZ reporter says, “How you doin’ tonight, sir.” Flynt’s entirely disconnected response is, “I’ve had more women than Hefner.”

Would someone please take the demented old codger home, wipe up his drool, and put him to bed.

Source: TMZ

Trump’s TV ratings sinking even faster than his real estate empire

celebrity apprentice cast

Poor Donald Trump can’t catch a break. If his current run of luck continues, “poor” may be the most appropriate to describe the real estate mogul and TV personality.

According to the Huffington Post, the second episode of Trump’s “Celebrity Apprentice” drew an audience 21% smaller than its season premiere episode.

That was about 25% less than ABC-TV’s anemic two hour programming block of “Desperate Housewives” and Brothers and Sisters,” which was also down 19%.

At this rate, it won’t be long until The Donald is spotting eating risotto served up by Michelle Obama.

Source: HuffingtonPost.com

75-year old Saudi woman gets 40 lashes, American media get reprieve

Ahhh, the beauty of Sharia Law. Coming soon to a country near you!
Ahhh, the beauty of Sharia Law. Coming soon to a country near you!

For some mysterious reason, this story’s barely made a blip in the news. Guess the American media’s just been too darn busy gushing over Michelle Obama’s arms.

A 75-year-old Saudi Arabian widow has been sentenced to 40 lashes and four months in jail for “mingling” with two young men who were not close relatives. One was her late husband’s nephew and the other was his business partner. Ah, the beauty of Islamic Sharia law.

One can’t help but notice the media’s striking lack of concern for women outside the United States. It’s rare to hear more than a whisper of protest from any print or broadcast media.

And the big name women’s organizations? Silent as Marcelle Marceau despite the fact that they’re always the first to say, “It’s one world. We’re one family of people. We’re all brothers and sisters.” Yet when confronted with horrible abuse in Muslim nations, the typical response is, “We must understand. We must not be so quick to criticize, because its their culture.”

Perhaps those 40 lashes would have been applied better to someone else. Send your nominations to IHateTheMedia.com.

Source: Yid With LID

Muslim leader tells true intentions: America will become a Muslim country

Muslims in America simply want to become good Americans. They just want picnics, beer bellies, and mortgages they can’t afford, like the rest of us. At least that’s what the media tells us.

Luckily, not-so-peaceful jihadists can’t keep their mouths shut. Stick a camera in front of one of these guys and he feels compelled to blab the truth. Apparently, a camera to jihadist is like sodium pentothal to a liar.

The attached video is from a Chicago-based TV show called Underground Railroad. They guest, Dr. Amir Ali, seems rather happy (eager, in fact) to announce that Islam and sharia law are coming to the good ol’ USA and that we’re destined to become an Islamic country.

Here’s another quote from Dr. Ali from the MarkedManner.com blog: “When Hitler reluctantly started to implement his ‘final solution’ in dealing with German Jews…whatever else he was, he was no dummy! What did he know about which we are as yet blissfully unaware?”

In the words of Joe Biden, “Gimme a f$#&kin’ break.”

Source: CreepingSharia.com, MarkedManner.com

Obama’s economic philosophy traced to childhood readings

Social scientists have long questioned the origin of President Obama’s most deeply-held economic philosophy.

Is it, they wondered, rooted in the mixed up mélange of cultures in which he was raised? Did it spring, as others suggested, from some genetic link to his father’s exotic homeland? Or does it arise, as some have proposed, from the spiritual awakening of his college years?

Now the truth can been discovered and can finally be revealed.

Barack Obama’s most treasured economic philosophies can been traced back to his extensive childhood reading of the works of Brant Parker and Johnnie Hart, two highly-regarded 20th century artists and political scientists.

wizard-of-bam

Pilot makes porn while flying helicopter, license yanked

Helicopter porn busted by the Federal Aviation Administration. The FAA revoked David Keith Martz’ pilot license this week when they saw an online video in which Martz had sex with porn star Puma Swede while flying his helicopter over San Diego.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUOoBwa2AVA

The Federal Aviation Administration revoked David Keith Martz’ pilot license this week.

Martz got the FAA’s attention when they saw an online video in which Martz had sex with porn star Puma Swede while flying his helicopter over San Diego. The FAA investigated after the videotaped sexcapade was made available online.

“We’re going to review the video. We’re going to try to speak to everyone in the video, including the porn star, and we’re going to go from there,” FAA spokesman Ian Gregor said. “We probably should have taken a closer look at the evidence when it was first presented to us. And I can assure you, we’re doing that right now.”

To repeat, the guy from the FAA said, “”We probably should have taken a closer look at the evidence when it was first presented to us. And I can assure you, we’re doing that right now.”

When did government guys get funny?

Source: Aero-News.net

NPR cuts newspaper subscriptions, still pays news anchors big bucks

You’ll be glad to know your tax dollars are being fiercely protected over at National Public Radio.

The publicly-supported broadcaster recognizes the tough times in which we live, so they’ve taken the radical step of slashing newspaper subscriptions from their budget. Here’s how the tragic news was broken to the staff:

As of April 1 NPR is canceling all newspaper subscriptions. We are making some arrangments to get the Wall Street Journal either on line or hard copy. You have until tomorrow to appeal this if there is a solid reason why you should be exempt. This is a cost saving measure company wide.

No word yet on whether they cut any of the exorbitant salaries paid to talent and producers. How exorbitant? How’s this:

Barbara Rehm, Managing Editor: $383,139
Robert Siegel, Host, All Things Considered: $350,288
Renee Montagne, Host, Morning Edition host: $332,160
Steve Inskeep, Host, Morning Edition: $331,242

Richard L. Harris, Afternoon Program Director: $190,267

So at a time when real world radio companies — those that don’t wallow in your tax dollars — are bleeding money, slashing salaries and laying off people left and right, NPR is cutting newspaper subscriptions.

Your tax dollars at work.

Source: NewsBusters.org

Joe Biden uncensored. Don’t listen if you can’t handle “the F-word”

joe_biden_fingersYou never know what’s going to come out of Joe Biden’s mouth. But we’ll bet you didn’t expect this.

Biden was at Union Station yesterday, bragging up Obama’s $1.3 billion “investment” in train stations and rail lines. The error-prone vice president was apparently unaware of a near-by microphone. When one of his former Senate colleagues called him “Mr. Vice President,” Biden replied with what is reportedly one of his favorite phrases:

[audio:https://www.ihatethemedia.com/wp-content/uploads/biden_give_me_a_fucking_break.mp3]

“Gimme a f*&$#ing break.”

Remember back in 2004 when Dick Cheney looked Senator Patrick Leahy straight in the eye and said, “Go f#$% yourself?” The libs got all weak in the knees, broke out in cold sweats, and swore they were absolutely horrified that Cheney had violated their virgin ears with such vile language.

Our reaction at the time? “Gimme a f*&$#ing break.”

Robert Gibbs drones on, White House reporter drops off

You’re the press secretary for the most powerful man on the planet. You’re in the middle of the greatest financial crisis in generations. Terrorists threaten the future of the world. Under the circumstances, people hang on your every word.

Unless you’re Robert Gibbs, the president’s press secretary. He smirks, he snarls, he smears, but even that isn’t enough to keep reporters from falling into deathlike trances during his daily press briefings.

One member of the White House press corps actually fell asleep yesterday. You can see her over the left shoulder of the reporter asking the question in this video.

It’s still a bit of a mystery who the heavy-lidded journalist may have been, but press corps observers say it appears to be Wall Street Journal reporter Laura Meckler, who is pregnant.

Our first inclination is to say, “Cut her some slack. She’s pregnant.” But upon further reflection, we’d like to amend that to, “Cut her some slack. She was listening to Robert Gibbs.”

Source: WJNO Radio and Gawker

Vanity Fair asks Rachel Maddow about fart fetishes. And other sophisticated stuff.

rachel maddow closeupConservatives are constantly told how unsophisticated they are. That they’re rubes. Bumpkins. Recent refugees from turnip trucks.

Well, listen here, you liberal city slickers. You can keep your sophistication, if that’s what they call it over at Vanity Fair magazine these days.

The current issue features an interview with MSBNC host Rachel Maddow. It’s probably the most bizarre interview ever conducted by a major publication. We’ll just tease you with this bizarre exchange:

Vanity Fair: Miss “Cable Queen,” as Vogue calls you, do you suffer from any paraphilia?
Maddow: Paraphilia?
Vanity Fair: Listen to this saucy pedant. Paraphilia is having a rare erotic fetish. Perhaps you may indulge in eproctophilia?

Maddow: Duh?
Vanity Fair: Darling! Eproctophiliacs are those sexually turned on by farts and farting!
Maddow: That word actually exists?

As you can see, we are simply not smart enough, not sophisticated enough, not freakin’ loony enough to be good leftists.

Bumpkins of the world unite!

Source: Vanity Fair

It’s our first weekend caption contest

<b>Click for full image</b>
Click for full image

Want to win an IHateTheMedia.com T-shirt or coffee mug? Just submit the funniest caption of the weekend (as a comment). Only one entry per person. We’ll pick the winner and send you the T-shirt or mug of your choice. Have fun. Be creative. Make us laugh.

CONGRATULATIONS TO OUR WINNER: Continue reading “It’s our first weekend caption contest”

Olbermann’s ratings shrinking faster than glacier in global warming

Top 10 cable shows for March 10, 2009After several months of soaring ratings, the numbers have dipped a tad over at Fox News. But they’re not complaining, because the numbers are in absolute freefall at MSNBC.

Looks like the election of President Obama is the best news Fox News has heard in years.

The accompanying chart looks at the top 10 cable TV shows for Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Source: MediaBistro, Nielsen Media Research

Ari Fleischer treats Chris Matthews like Chris Brown treated Rihanna

Chris Matthews misunderestimated former Bush press secretary Ari Fleisher last night on “Hardball.” When the MSNBC host attacked, Fleischer gave him a lesson in verbal pugalistics.

The “Hardball” host had barely said hello when he went on the attack.

“What brings you back?” Matthews challenged. “Is this the return from Elba? Is this the 100 days of Napoleon’s return from Crawford? What is going on with this network of former Bushies — current Bushies, I should say — singing the old song?”

“Well, Chris,” Fleischer responded coolly, “I’m here because you invited me to be here.”

“Oh, yes,” Matthews stammered. “OK.”

It went downhill from there. Every time Matthews attempted to land a body blow, Fleischer dodged it and delivered a stinging punch of his own. He never backed down.

At one point, Fleischer said, “Chris, do you ever not interrupt your guests, or is that all you’d like to do?” Even Matthews’ off-camera crew cracked up.

At various times in the interview, Fleisher called Matthews “disingenuous” and “shameful,” accused him of twisting people’s words, and said “How dare you?”

Enjoy the video, because we don’t think Matthews will invite Fleischer back on Hardball very soon.

Source: MSNBC.COM, NewsBusters.com

Make big bucks with Obama’s Magic Money Machine™

anigif_obama-makes-it-rain-with-surprise-9371-1236962397-4Down on your luck? Out of work? Bank foreclosing on your house? Wish you had a source of unlimited money?

Well, now you do! It’s called Obama’s Magic Money Machine™. And you can have one of your very own for just three easy payments of $19.95 per month. In fact, forget that. Obama’s Magic Money Machine will pay youuuuuuu.

But wait, there’s more! Call now and in addition to Obama’s Magic Money Machine™, we’ll give you a ShamWow and a Snuggie absolutely freeeeeee! But you must call now, because this special offer is only good for the first 300,000,000 callers. Not an American citizen? That’s no problem, either. Just swim across the river and give us a call because we hablamos español, senors y senoritas!

Obama’s Magic Money Machine™. Personally endorsed by Barney Frank and Christopher Dodd. Call now 1-800-IHATETHEMEDIA.COM.

*Obama’s Magic Money Machine™ is a registered trademark of IHateTheMedia.com.

NOTE: This is a freakin’ parody. Do not call that phone number. For all we know, it belongs to some porn operation in Bangkok.

Quite frankly, Barney Frank is a lying sack of @*$&!

barney frank madBarney Frank is a lying sack of excrement. Oh, we beg your pardon. Did we say that? It just slipped out by accident.

Here’s a Bloomberg News story from March 5, 2009:

“U.S. House Financial Services Committee Chairman Barney Frank said he wants to see people prosecuted for wrongdoing related to the financial crisis as lawmakers overhaul regulation of Wall Street.”

“Frank will call on attorneys general, bank regulators and officials from the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission to outline plans for prosecuting and recovering funds from those responsible for the crisis, he said today at a news conference in Washington.”

“’What are your plans to prosecute those people whose irresponsible and, in some cases, criminal actions helped bring about this crisis?’ said Frank, a Massachusetts Democrat.”

He’s a hero, that Barney Frank. A man of honesty, courage, and conviction. A man who did everything possible to keep our financial system safe. Except when he’s the afore-mentioned lying sack of excrement as proven by this quote from a September, 2003 House Financial Services Committee hearing:

“I worry, frankly, that there’s a tension here. The more people, in my judgment, exaggerate a threat of safety and soundness, the more people conjure up the possibility of serious financial losses to the Treasury, which I do not see. I think we see entities that are fundamentally sound financially and withstand some of the disaster scenarios…I believe there has been more alarm raised about potential unsafety and unsoundness than, in fact, exists.”

George Washington couldn’t tell a lie. Bill Clinton couldn’t tell the truth. And Barney Frank can’t tell the difference.

Source: Bloomberg, Ace of Spades

Liberal CBS News anchor Katie Couric wins award named for liberal CBS News anchor Walter Cronkite.

Katie Couric may never win the ratings, but who cares? She just took home a coveted Cronkite Award (which we assume is called a “Wally” by TV insiders).

Couric’s Wally was presented for “her revealing, multi-part interview of Republican Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin.”

The Wallies are awarded twice each year by the USC Annenberg School for Communication. They are named in honor of Walter Cronkite, once known as “the most trusted man in America.”

Couric won her award in the category “Special Achievement for National Impact on the 2008 Campaign.” Judges said the interview was a “defining moment in the 2008 presidential campaign.” But they didn’t stop here. No siree, Bob. They also called it “extraordinary, persistent and detailed.”

Other winners included ABC’s George Stephanopolous, who eked out a narrow win in the category “Best Achievement in Hair” and CBS’ Bob Schieffer, who took home a Wally in the category “Most Likely to Keel Over Dead In the Middle of a Story.”

All in all, it was an exciting evening for one and all.

Source: Huffington Post, Reliable Sources

Air America adds trash talk TV host Montel Williams

montel_williamsFormer trash TV host and current presidential coin conman Montel Williams is joining Air America. He has the perfect resume for floundering libtalk network – no radio experience.

“Montel Across America” debuts in April. Here’s how Air America describes this momentous occasion in a press release:

“Meet Air America’s newest addition, Emmy award-winning host Montel Williams! His new Air America program is called ‘Montel Across America,’ and it debuts April 6 airing weekdays from 9am-12pm EST on radio stations across the country.”

“On radio stations?” Most press releases include the number of radio stations. Like “Dennis Miller will debut in 73 markets.” Or “Rush Limbaugh is heard on 600 radio stations.” But Air America really doesn’t want to get into that sort of thing because they have so few affiliates.

So let’s just leave it at “…debuts April 6 from 9am-12pm EST on radio stations….”

“Next up on Air America, Rikki Lake asks teenage girls, ‘Who’s your baby daddy?”

Source: Radio Equalizer

Just for fun
City council meeting disrupted by Arkansas barking spiders

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jrBaV5MvX_4Let’s be honest about this. This video has absolutely nothing to do with the media. Fact is, we’re running it simply because it’s funny.

Sure, we could probably come up with some lame rationale that would somehow tie it to the media. But we’re not even going to try.

Oh, wait a sec. It’s a city council meeting. So it probably ran on local community access television.

Voila. It’s media-related and we now feel fully justify in running it here at IHateTheMedia.com.

Another Obama nominee bites the dust, Queen tune nominated as administration theme song

Another week, another Obama nominee bites the dust. But at least this one had paid his taxes.

President Obama’s controversial choice to be Chairman of the National Intelligence Council has withdrawn his name from consideration for the post.

Charles W. Freeman blamed the “Israel lobby” for his problems. Others said the withdrawal had more to do with questions about Freeman’s financial ties to China and Saudi Arabia.

Financial ties to China and Saudi Arabia? Who does this guy think he is, Bill Clinton?

Speaking of Bill Clinton, remember how the Clinton campaign was so successful using Fleetwood Mac’s “Don’t Stop Thinking About Tomorrow” as its theme song?

We think it’s time for you to choose a theme song for your administration, Mr. President. May we suggest the little ditty performed by Queen in the attached video. Certainly seems appropriate.

Don’t thank us, Mr. President. We’re here for you.

Source: The Politico

Terrorist informant links Ayers and wife to murder of policeman

Terrorist Bill Ayers standing on the American flag
Terrorist Bill Ayers standing on the American flag

More bad news for unrepentant terrorist Bill Ayers and his equally-unrepentant wife Bernadette Dorhn.

Larry Grathwohl was an FBI informant who infiltrated Ayer’s Weather Underground terrorist group in the 1970s. He’s holding a press conference in San Francisco today to talk about things Ayers and Dohrn would rather keep buried in the past.

Here’s part of Grathwohl’s pre-released opening statement:

“The San Francisco Police Department Park Station bombing occurred on February 16, 1970, when a pipe bomb filled with shrapnel detonated on the ledge of a window at the San Francisco Police Department’s Golden Gate Park station. According to the San Francisco Chronicle, “Investigators in the early ’70s said the bombing likely was the work of the Weather Underground, and not the Black Liberation Army,” but the crime was never solved. Brian V. McDonnell, a police sergeant, was fatally wounded in its blast; Robert Fogarty, another police officer, was severely wounded in his face and legs and was partially blinded.”

“No one was ever charged with the crime although six years the FBI was close to indicting Ayers wife and fellow terrorist Bernardine Dohrn around six years ago.”

“I was in the Weather Underground as an informant/infiltrator for the FBI. I have testified, spoken, and written about the involvement of Weather Underground terrorist leaders Bill Ayers and Bernardine Dohrn in that bombing…There is no statute of limitations on murder.”

Attorney General Eric Holder is probably working on those pardon papers already.

Source: YidwithLid.com

Chuck Norris calls for rebellion, wants to be “President of Texas”

chuck norris flagBadass good guy Chuck Norris claims Texas has never formally been part of the United States and that the Lone Star State may lead a rebellion by seceding from the union. And if that happens, he’d like to be president of the new Lone Star Republic.

“That need may be a reality sooner than we think,” he said in a column at WorldNetDaily. “If not me, someone someday may again be running for president of the Lone Star state, if the state of the union continues to turn into the enemy of the state.”

“…we’ve bastardized the First Amendment,” he continued, “reinterpreted America’s religious history and secularized our society until we ooze skepticism and circumvent religion on every level of public and private life.”

We might move to Texas just to see President Norris kick Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s bony little ass. Toss ‘em both into an ultimate fighting cage. Only one man comes out alive. Put it all on pay TV. Bingo. The budget is balanced and peace is restored.

Thank you, President Norris.

Source: Examiner.com; WorldnetDaily

Michelle Obama, Beyonce and Wonder Woman. All wrapped up in one convenient story

<b>Beyonce, Michelle Obama, Wonder Woman. Separated at birth?</b>
Beyonce, Michelle Obama, Wonder Woman. Separated at birth?

This started off as two completely different stories, but a third story popped up during our research that magically tied all three stories together into one mega-blockbuster piece of investigative reportage.

Story Number One: Beyonce claims that Michelle Obama approached her during an inauguration celebration just to say that the singer was a role model for her little girls.

Story Number Two: A story in the Huffington Post compares Michelle Obama to Wonder Woman.

Neither of those stories seemed strong enough to merit our attention. Goofy enough, to be sure, but not strong. But then, we ran into Story Number Three. It was kismet, fate, truth stranger than fiction.

Story Number Three: The LA Times reported on November 7, 2008 (just two days after the presidential election) that Beyonce desperately wanted to land the role of Wonder Woman in an upcoming film.

Do you see where this is going? Michelle Obama calls Beyonce a role model. Michelle Obama is like Wonder Woman. Beyonce wants to be Wonder Woman. This inextricable linkage cannot be mere coincidence. We contend that they are one and the same woman.

Just look at the evidence: All three dominate weak men. All three specialize in sleeveless costumes. And all three are black.

What’s that? You thought Wonder Woman was white? Au contraire, mon frere. Check out the junk in that trunk.

Source: The Sun, Huffington Post, Los Angeles Times

Comedian Bernie Mac accused of stealing $50 billion

Telling the difference between Bernie Mac and Bernie Madoff seems pretty simple to us.

One lost his life, the other lost $50 billion. One never stole more than a punch line, but the other stole a fortune from widows and orphans. One was black, the other is white.

Nevertheless, an MSBNC anchor had a bit of trouble telling one from the other while reporting that prosecutors will be seeking $170 Billion from Madoff. The older, whiter, more crooked of the two is expected to plead guilty to 11 criminal counts and could spend up to 150 years in the slammer. If he serves his full term, he will be 220 years old upon release.

We miss you, Bernie. And we mean Mac, not Madoff.

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