Author: editor

Why did the Washington Post censor today’s Doonesbury comic strip?

Many times over the years, newspapers have chosen not to run Doonesbury comic strips for one reason or another. Creator Garry Trudeau often focuses on topics that editors and readers find offensive.

Today, the Washington Post was so offended that it refused to run the strip. What was the topic they found so offensive? Was it sex? Drugs? Crude language? No, the topic was the recent layoffs at the Washington Post. Instead, they ran a “Doonesbury Flashback” strip–a rerun.

So much for the WaPo, that vaunted bastion of free speech and truth.

The real question, though, should be, why does any newspaper still run Doonesbury? It hasn’t been funny in at least 35 years. It’s the Janeane Garafalo of comic strips.

Here, thanks to MediaBistro, is today’s censored strip.

 

Toxic Janeane Garafalo compares Limbaugh to Manson & Hitler

janeane_garofalo_200x300Unfunny comedienne Janeane Garafalo showed up on Keith Olbermann’s show last night. She was as unfunny as ever, but Keith laughed Olber-maniacally anyway.

“The type of female that does like Rush is the same type of woman that falls in love with prisoners,” she said. After mentioning Richard Ramirez and Charles Manson, she continued by saying, “Eva Braun, Hitler’s girlfriend, that’s exactly the type of woman that responds really well to Rush.”

“(Former CNN anchor Daryn Kagan) dated him,” the ever-so-charming Garafalo whined, “so either she suffers from Stockholm Syndrome, a lot like Michael Steele, who’s the black guy in the Republican party who suffers from Stockholm Syndrome, which means you try and curry favor with the oppressor…any female or person of color in the Republican party is struggling with Stockholm Syndrome.”

Janeane Garafalo, equal opportunity hater.

Update: The Red Eye Crew has a good time ridiculing Garafalo (and Keith Olbermann) on this and related comments. It’s funnier than hell and worth watching. Includes video of Garafalo and Olbermann with their quotes.

CNN proclaims Michelle Obama cool, cooler, coolest first lady ever. Cool.

 

We’re not quite sure why CNN’s Showbiz Tonight has an “Obama Watch.” We must have missed the news report that said the Obamas are now part of show biz.

The video in this article is from last night’s Showbiz Tonight. Let us sum it up for you:

“Michelle Obama. Cool. Cooler. Coolest. So cool. Really cool. Super cool. Mega-cool. Coooooooool.”

The video is 4:53 long. We pulled these quotes out of the first two minutes. Then we had to stop watching. Just had to. Couldn’t take it anymore.

“She definitely gets cool points from me.”
“People want to emulate her.”
“People love the way she loves her husband.”
“This is really a breath of fresh air.”
“She’s absolutely relatable and people really like that about her.”
“She seems like a real person and I think people really appreciate that. I know I do.”
“Part of her cool factor is her style.”
“The first lady is setting style trends left and right.”
“Women everywhere want to dress like her.”

We doubt that you’re reading this last sentence. You probably stopped reading even quicker than we stopped watching.

Reporter fired for his inappropriately exposing his bright blue scrotum

<b>This is definitely not Attorney General Eric Holder.</b>
This is definitely not Attorney General Eric Holder.

A Baltimore television reporter has been fired for creating the infamous John Gibson “bright blue scrotum” video.

In the doctored video, comments Gibson made on Fox News about an escaped monkey were cut together with completely unrelated comments he made about U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder.

WBAL-TV, an NBC affiliate, admitted that one of its former employee had posted the video on YouTube without its knowledge. Other media outlets revealed that the WBAL reporter responsible for the doctored video had been fired.

This seems unfair to us. What color is the attorney general’s scrotum? Do we know for sure it’s not bright blue? This is the man who has sworn to uphold the law of the land. Before the reporter is fired, shouldn’t Holder be required to produce the evidence?

Mysterious blonde stalking Limbaugh. Could it be Chris Matthews?

<b> Low resolution security camera photo of mysterious blonde stalker. Please notify authorities if you have any clues to this person's identity.</b>
Low resolution security camera photo of mysterious blonde stalker. Please notify authorities if you have any clues to this person's identity.

Ooh-la-la. According to police reports (view PDF), Rush Limbaugh is being stalked by a mysterious blonde named Melanie. She’s 30-40 years old, and drives a new, white sedan.

Wait. It’s a woman? Then it might not be Matthews after all.

According to 911 records, the mysterious blonde attempted to follow Rush’s car through the gates of his Palm Beach estate yesterday. She hightailed it before police arrived.

Rush was cool, calm and collected about the whole thing. “I’ll deal with it,” he said in an email to Jose Lambiet, a columnist and blogger for the Palm Beach Post. “Part of the territory.”

That’s all we know. Ten-four, over and out. (We don’t actually know what that means, but we’ve wanted to say it ever since we were kids and watched Broderick Crawford on that old “Highway Patrol” TV show.)

Source: Page2Live

Press ignores UN admission that Israel never shelled school in Gaza

israel_flag1This is one of those stories the media never covers. And one of the reasons we hate them.

During the recent Gaza conflict, it was widely reported that Israel Defense Forces had bombed a U.N. school in the Jabalya refugee camp. This led activists to accuse Israel of war crimes and U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon to demand an investigation.

Now the U.N. reports that “a clerical error” led them to falsely accuse Israel of the attack. The international organization’s January 6 field report said an IDF shell had caused fatalities when it hit outside the school, but an updated field report dated January 7 said the shell hit the school itself.

U.N. spokesperson Roseanne Roseannadanna said, “Oops. Never mind.”

Funny how coverage is so much spottier when it comes to retractions. Especially when it involves Israel.

The truth exposed: Helen Thomas is really Billy Crystal

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4BRI0NtQ1DUHelen Thomas has been squatting there in the front row of the White House press briefing room all these years and now we discover she doesn’t even really exist.

It’s all been a giant practical joke played on America by comedian Billy Crystal.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D-inZNvPyzE width=”300″ height=”230″Want proof? Watch these two videos. You’ll be convinced that battle axe reporter Helen Thomas is just another one of Billy Crystal’s crazy characters. In fact, it’s the same character he played in The Princess Bride. Same face. Same voice. Same lunacy.

We’re onto you, Crystal. Did you really think you could fool top notch investigative reporters like IHateTheMedia.com?

Another Washington DC child porn bust. This time it’s an ex-editor for NPR.

david_malakoff1Apparently, D.C. stands for “Disgusting Creep.” Last month it was a reporter for Fox News. This month it’s a former National Public Radio science editor.

Legal documents (click here to view) say David Malakoff has been charged with possessing child porn between April and June, 2008. He had been a science editor and on-air correspondent for the publicly-supported radio network until he “resigned” in June, 2008. Interesting juxtaposition of dates, we’d say.

Watch for more news as this dirt-o-rama develops in D.C.

Joe Biden’s blunder of the day

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Hear an investigative report on another of Joe's numerous blunders. Click image to watch.

We’re thinking of making this a daily feature. Because Blunderin’ Joe Biden provides plenty of material.

“What I don’t understand from Governor Jindal is what would he do,” Biden said on the CBS Early Show. “In Louisiana there’s 400 people a day losing their jobs. What’s he doing?”

Then Joe’s fantasy ran smack dab into reality when Shreveport, Louisiana-based KSLA-TV investigated the real situation.

“In December, Louisiana was the only state in the nation besides the District of Columbia — according to the national press release — that added employment over the month,” they reported. “The state gained 3,700 jobs for the seasonally adjusted employment.”

The source of Biden’s information is often mysterious, but it doesn’t match stats from the labor department. At 5.9%, Louisiana’s unemployment rate is far lower than the national average of 7.2%.

Who writes this guy’s material? He’s hilarious.

Source: KSLA News 12 Shreveport Louisiana

Direct link to KSLA’s investigative report video here

Does Chris Matthews fantasize Obama is Captain Kirk (and he’s a sexy green alien girl)?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLQM8NKrHuwChris Matthews revealed a little too much about himself on Wednesday night’s Hardball.

“The Conservative Political Action Conference begins its three day meeting tomorrow in Washington,” Matthews stammered, “and take a look at some of the panels being offered. ‘Al Franken and ACORN: How Liberals Are Destroying the American Election System.’ ‘Will Congress Take Your Guns?’ ‘The True Cost of Global Warming Hysteria.’ If you like Star Trek conventions, you’ll love this baby.”

Sounds to us like Chris may have attended a Star Trek convention or two in his time. Probably in costume. If that’s the case, we have a suggestion for him: Try following Spock’s example and use logic once in a while. It could change your life.

Now would someone please put their phaser on stun and shut this guy up?

Bill O’Reilly out, Fred Thompson in

fred_thompson_jeri_kehnBill O’Reilly’s giving up his day job. He’s leaving “The Radio Factor” and passing the baton to Fred Thompson.

Thompson has an incredibly serpentine career path. Actor. Senator from Tennessee. Actor. Presidential candidate. Actor. And now, radio talk show host.

The Washington, DC-based “Fred Thompson Show” will focus on politics and pop culture. He’ll have guests and take phone calls. It will premiere on more than 125 stations March 2.

One one hand, we’re not really sure if the slow talkin’ southerner will be a very compelling radio host. On the other hand, his wife Jeri Kehn is hot.

Good enough for us.

Minneapolis newspaper supports unions. Unless it’s their workers’ union.

support_unions_stickerThe Minneapolis Star Tribune loves the working class. They love big labor. Until it comes to its own workers and their union.

The struggling Star-Trib wants a bankruptcy court to void its contract with the printer’s union so the newspaper can save $3.5 million a year in labor costs.

In a written statement, the Star-Tribune’s management said, “Yes, we are hypocritical boneheads whose political philosophy has guided us to the verge of bankruptcy. We humbly apologize for all the poorly conceived pro-labor editorials we’ve written over the years.”

To be entirely truthful, the Star-Tribune didn’t really say anything remotely resembling that previous paragraph.

But don’t you think they should have?

National Association for the Advancement of Colored People shows its true colors

post_cartoonThe NAACP has called for a boycott of the New York Post. In other words, they’ve endorsed censorship.

In a truly bizarre distortion of reality, the organization called the Post’s infamous chimpanzee cartoon “an invitation to assassinate” President Obama.

Benjamin Todd Jealous, the aptly-named president of the NAACP, called for the removal of editor Col Allan and long-time cartoonist Sean Delonas.

Earlier this week, the newspaper apologized to anyone who may have been offended by the cartoon. But the NAACP says the apology was insufficient and called for readers to boycott the Post.

This is like looking at clouds. I look at one and see a cute little bunny. You look at the same cloud and see the violent, Lee Harvey Oswald of chimpanzees.

In the immortal words of Mick Jagger, “Hey, you, get off of my cloud.”

Source: AP

Did you know Al Gore invented hiphop?

We don’t know if this music video qualifies as rap or hiphop. But we’re pretty sure neither genre will be too quick to claim it.

Things haven’t been going well for our friends in the global warming crowd lately, what with the freakishly cold weather in the northern hemisphere this winter.

So they’re doing a little outreach to rap and/or hiphop fans. Because as the number of true believers dwindles, they need to reach out to people they’ve never targeted before. It’s their attempt to be “relevant.”

Listen and laugh. It actually makes Brittney Spears’ a capella work sound good.

Radio execs willing to do almost anything for a beer

budewiser_friendsIf there’s anyone who could use a nice, cold brewski right now, it’s the poor guys struggling to survive in the radio business. But Budweiser’s not buying a round for the house.

According to Radio Daily News, Budweiser beer, owned by brewing giant Anheuser-Busch, has informed radio stations that they won’t be paid for 120 days after its commercials run.

To make matters worse, Bud also told stations that they must maintain the current level of “value-added” promotions (things like personal appearances, on-air mentions, etc).

A few years ago, radio stations would have laughed at Bud’s draconian conditions. But with advertising revenue rapidly drying up, broadcasters are expected to meekly acquiesce.

Anheuser-Busch is currently under investigation to determine if they “donated” to Al Sharpton’s various “charities.” Our guess is that Sharpton didn’t have to wait for 120 days for his money.

American Idolatry: Simon Cowell wants to live forever

simon_cowell1In a move sure to make thousands of singers wish they were dead, American Idol judge has announced that he wants to live forever.

The caustic American Idol judge wants to be frozen upon his death so he can be revived in the future.

“I have decided to freeze myself when I die. You know, cryonics,” he announced to dinner guests at Prime Minister Gordon Brown’s residence. “Medical science is bound to work out a way of bringing us back to life in the next century or so, and I want to be available when they do. I would be doing the nation an invaluable service.”

Fellow American Idol judge Paula Abdul has taken another approach to eternal life. Instead of being frozen, the erratic star seems to prefer getting pickled.

Source: DailyMall

Joy Behar says chimp cartoon is “an assassination threat” on Obama

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRGan85AIlAAny day now, psychiatrists are going to walk right onto the set while they’re taping The View and take Joy Behar away to a nice, padded room.

She actually said the infamous chimp cartoon is “an assassination threat” on President Obama. Seriously. She said that. We’re not making it up.

“I think you can be investigated by the FBI,” she declared, “if you make an assassination threat.”

Coming up next week on The View, Behar suggests that Angelina Jolie should adopt Little Orphan Annie, demands increased unemployment compensation for Dilbert, and congratulates Doonesbury on his enlightened drug policy.

Then, as soon as the show is over, she’ll rush off for her annual physical with Rex Morgan, M.D.

Ex-Gitmo inmates appear in Al-Qaeda video, American nets take notice

Two of the “innocent” terrorists released from Gitmo are now appearing in a chilling jihadist website video.

According to anti-terrorism experts, Abu Sufyan al-Azdi al-Shahri, or prisoner number 372, now holds an executive position with Al-Qaeda in Yemen. Abu al-Hareth Muhammad al-Oufi, or prisoner number 333, is now an Al-Qaeda field commander.

American network talent scouts, always on the prowl for talent, were quick to note the duo’s charismatic screen presence.

“We’re developing a Hannity & Colmes style show for them,” said an executive with NBC. “We’ll call it ‘al-Shahri & al-Oufi.’”

“We’re planning a Hannity & Colmes style show for them,” said an executive with MSNBC. “We’ll call it ‘Abu & Abu.’”

We’re planning a Hannity & Colmes style show for them,” said an executive with CNN. “We’ll call it ‘372 & 333.’”

Source: Sky News

Bush more popular than Obama, The One now ranks number two

bush_obama_walkingOur thanks for Newsbusters’ Noel Sheppard for this one.

According to the results of the latest Gallup poll, George Bush had a higher approval rating after one month in office than Barack Obama.

“For the first time since Gallup began tracking Barack Obama’s presidential job approval rating on Jan. 21,” the poll revealed, “fewer than 60% of Americans approve of the job he is doing as president…59% of Americans give Obama a positive review….”

In a similar poll conducted a month after President Bush’s first inauguration, his approval rating was 62%.

To repeat, Bush 62%, Barack Obama 59%. This thing is going down in flames faster than the Hindenberg.

Would someone please call Mount Rushmore and put the new Barack Obama addition on hold?

Joe Biden doesn’t know the difference between a website and a telephone

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=71pTSTwSzK0Ahhhh, Joe Biden. Once again he’s proven that he is the comedy writer’s best friend.

This morning he went on the CBS Early Show to hype Obama’s “stimulus” program and the new government website that lets us track how our money is being spent (or China’s money, as the case may be).

Unfortunately for poor ol’ Joe, he had to admit he didn’t know what the website is. In fact, he didn’t appear to know what the internet is.

“You know, I’m embarrassed,” a flustered Biden admitted. (Looking for help off camera) “Do you know the website number? I should have it in front of me and I don’t. I’m actually embarrassed. (after receiving the information from off camera) Excuse me. It’s recovery.gov. Recovery.gov.”

What’s the website number? We just called information. It’s 1-800-BONEHEAD.

MSNBC screws up, reacts to Bobby Jindal by saying, “Oh God”

Someone on MSNBC disparagingly muttered “Oh, God” on the air last night as Governor Bobby Jindal of Louisiana approached the camera to give the Republican response to President Obama’s speech. And we don’t think it was because they worship the ground Jindal walks on.

We’ve never been mistaken for Aristotle, but logic tells us Chris Matthews is probably the culprit, since the loquacious host has now developed the remarkable ability to analyze a speech even before it is given.

At the beginning the evening, before Obama had uttered a word, Matthews declared that his speech was “Churchillian.” So it seems only logical that he would bookend the night by panning Jindal’s response in advance.

What caused the outburst? Some observers think the “Oh, God” comment may have slipped out during an unguarded moment of ecstasy while the obviously-smitten Matthews was imagining his man love for the president.

Either that or Keith Olbermann said it when he saw the object of his affection in a mirror.

SOURCE: Fox News

Britney Spears sings with no music track. Cover your ears.

Let’s get right to the point. Because nothing we could write could possibly be funnier than the sound of Britney Spears singing without a music track.

In fact, there are lots of things we’d rather hear before we have to listen to Britney sing again.

For example, the hideous screeching of a she devil giving birth. The mournful wailing of a coyote whose leg is caught in trap. The sound of lunatic eating his own tongue.

But we’re feeling charitable today, so let’s just say, “Ladies and gentlemen, here’s Britney Spears.”

MSNBC’s Norah O’Donnell run over by steamroller

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QAytq2Dh_SwOuch. Norah O’Donnell never saw it coming. It’s been hours now and she’s probably still woozy after the figurative beating she took from documentary maker John Ziegler.

Ziegler’s out promoting “Media Malpractice,” his new documentary, by making the rounds of all the news and talk shows. Today was MSNBC’s turn.

Based on the smug smile on O’Donnell’s face when the interview started, she though Ziegler was going to be easy pickings. She was wrong.

The former talk show host immediately went on the attack. He repeatedly and pointedly made her look like the empty-headed news babe she is (and by the way, politics aside, Norah O’Donnell is a babe).

Ziegler clearly enjoyed every moment of this interview. Norah, not so much.

For the Media Malpractice documentary, go here.

Playboy may fold (or centerfold, as the case may be)

playboy_bunny_logoThe Playboy empire may be on the auction block. If it can’t find a buyer, it has to figure out how to survive massive losses that show no sign of diminishing.

Last week, the “sophisticated” gentlemen’s magazine had a dismal conference call announcing its fourth quarter and full-year financial results. Jerome Kern, the company’s interim CEO, gulped and reported a 2008 loss of $156 million.

Kern admitted he’s “open to discussions” about a possible sale. In the last six months, the company has eliminated 80 jobs, lost its CEO (founder Hugh Hefner’s daughter Christie), moved back to Chicago, and replaced its editorial director. Critics also complain that the magazine has no internet strategy.

The magazine desperately needs to attract a younger demographic. So it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that one of its problems is that its most visible spokesman is an 82-year old man who pretends he’s sleeping with three attractive young women.

Hugh Hefner seems to have “sophistication” confused with “sophomoric.”

Source: Mediabistro

Rantin’ Rick Santelli viewed 2,500,000 times

If you think the rant by CNBC’s Rick Santelli hasn’t tapped into a reservoir of resentment across this nation, get this:

Since it went online last Thursday, the clip has been viewed more than 1,800,000 times on CNBC.com. It’s also been viewed more than 700,000 times on YouTube.com. (These numbers are growing so rapidly that they’ll be out of date by the time you read this.)

Rantin’ Rick Santelli, one media guy we don’t hate.

Source: MediaBistro

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